Thread 721149026

If pokemon were real, would you actually pack up and go on a journey innawoods with them?

>>721149026 (OP)
is this dagasi?

>>721149026 (OP)
if pokemon were real everyone would be too busy eating and/or fucking

>>721149026 (OP)
I'd be shagging that weedcat with my tongue until my jaw hurt than with my cock until my cock hurt. Daily.

>>721149026 (OP)
i'd be too busy starting a breeding farm for all the eevee forms to make loads of cash

>>721149026 (OP)
I'd go as deep innawoods as I can so I can fuck them without my neighbors calling the cops on me only to find an entire colony of Pokéfuckers who went out to do the same thing

>>721149026 (OP)
a :3 face is not an excuse to want to fuck animals

>>721150248
Or boys lol :3

Why does this image feel so jarring for some reason?

>>721150327
Because it's AI sloppa. Even when you roll a 1 in 100 result with no visible flaws, there will always be something off about it.

>>721149026 (OP)
if pokemon was real there would be no journey to go on, what are you going to challenge the pokemon league? It would be like baseball where you need to train from birth to be good enough to compete and then your pokemon will die at some point and youll be destitute on the street with no skills. What do you think YOU can discover a new pokemon give me a break.

>>721149193
dAIgasi

>>721150327
Besides the AI?
Each of those starters is from a different generation. They are not usually grouped together at all.

>>721149026 (OP)
you're legally an adult at 10, I probably would have at that age, yeah.

>>721151263
Except, you know, being the 3 starters with sexiest final evos.

>>721150248
do you get paid by the government or your tranny polycule to virtue signal like this all the time?

>>721150802
I'm the prodigy trainer lucky guy that has everything handed to him, oh yeah.

>>721151350
The catch is that your legal name is now Dicks.

>>721149026 (OP)
Why would I do that when I can commute 1 hour each way to a 9 hour (1 hour forced lunch) office job that barely pays rent?

>>721151313
A matter of opinion, and not typically done with the stage 1 forms. Most would just have the final evos.
A strange prompt.

>>721149026 (OP)
i would probably die of an heart attack or some sexual disease because my whole day would just be fucking pokemon

>>721149026 (OP)
What and kill a bunch of wild coyotes and animals with them?
I feel like that would do more environmental damage than otherwise. Pokemon would be better off utilizing elements for free like a lot of those slave labor ideas Team Rocket had but y'know, possibly ethical.
Economy would crash though with corpos replacing humans with them for minimal pay (upkeep feed) so innawoods would probably be the only sustainable thing any of us schmucks, with or without.
I'd sooner invest in an electric type to keep the lights on. I also don't think I'd actually fuck one. I have the charisma of a black hole.

>>721149026 (OP)
>catch every single pokemon
>have sex with all of them
>write down how you had sex with them, how they behave, whats the best way to go at it, what kind of pussy they have, how it felt, how it tastes, smells, everything, with numbers and pictures and shit
>make it into an enciclopedia
>becomes bestseller
>get rich
>also get human pussy because you are rich
>be in tv all the time and tell people pokemon are better to fuck than humans

>>721149026 (OP)
long distance cycling to be honest

Well 2BPH I'd rather get raped to death by wild PKMN regardless of their gender because I don't deserve any choice over who's fuckmeat I would become.

>>721152213
Why is this slut always showing its ass

It's the pokeball tech that needs to be real
If that shit was around now, every one would start capturing raccoons, beavers, bears, and foxes.

>>721149026 (OP)
What's up with those elemental foxes, and the elemental monkeys and elemental balls?

I get that you can have 3 versions of the same mon in water/fire/grass but it feels lazy to just have pallet swapped mons and it detracts that there is some elemental affinity to the breed.

>>721152353
no idea

>>721150802
>It would be like baseball where you need to train from birth to be good enough to compete and then your pokemon will die at some point and youll be destitute on the street with no skills.
The monster rancher series covers that. Monsters are reanimated using a losttech hellgate, live about four years and are trained like boxers for cockfighting. Additionally, they get blended and combined in a destructive forced breeding process.

Also humans live for over a hundred years with little apparent aging.

>>721149026 (OP)
>fire on demand
Fennekin wins and it's not even close

>>721153231
Fennekin already won by virtue of evolving into Delphox.

What's the logic for when eating pokemon is okay versus cruel? Magikarp and seabass and other pure fishmons seem okay. Slowbro tails considered somewhat cruel? Tentacool calamari? Milktank steaks? Tepig or lechonk pulled pork?

What about grass types? Are they mostly too poisonous? Are there some that are staples?

Are cottonee harvested for textiles? Do they survive like a sheep or die?

>>721152353
Never been around a cat before?

>>721152242
>I don't deserve any choice
why?

>>721149026 (OP)
Wether feral or anthro-coded, sentient or feral , mons would NEVER do it with humans

>>721149026 (OP)
If they were real we'd be fucking dead.

>>721152889
>monster rancher series
Wait, that shit has actual games? I only know the anime.
Are the games any good?

>>721153736
Yes, they're good. Challenging unless you use a guide/walkthrough.

>>721149576
This might seem like a good idea, but I doubt you'd be the only one to think this. It's like saying that German Shepherds seem popular so you're going to open a breeding farm for them and make loads of cash. You'd be competing with too many people. If you want to make money you'd probably have to become a League Champion with them and then breed them.

>>721153675
>first picture is a child hugging it
Nah we'd win.

>>721153634
Because I'm a despicable individual who will never understand why he's even still alive and is a thankless money drain upon everyone around me, due to a bunch of undiagnosed mental disorders I don't even care about - since I'll never afford to medicate anyways?

>>721149026 (OP)
>>721150802
>>721152889

The Pokemon series, and Satoshi has mentioned it once or twice: the player character is an exceptional autist, most people quickly abandoned the "dream" to be a pokemon master after a year or two and ordinary people can only take care of Pokemon relevant to their job/lifestyle background (Ranger, Gardner, Rancher, Policeman, most normal people in-game really just have pet-types) with the more 'niche' Pokemon trainers coming from some kind of devoted cultural background like psionics or dragon tamers.

>>721153563
>What's the logic for when eating pokemon is okay versus cruel?

There's three answers to this:
-Pokemon possess a weird four-quadrant compass of non-human intelligence, human intelligence, and minimal/no intelligence. Most fish, bugs, grass-types, seem to be fairly stupid for example.
-Some Pokemon by-products aren't necessarily harmful or lethal to harvest: crab claws, tentacles, grass-type fruit/foliage, milk, etc.
-Modern society is less comfortable with eating Pokemon and has been introducing more and more meat-alternatives and vegetarian options.

>>721153657
Please don't use any images made by somebody that regularly delivers Porkyman porn requests for me as fuel in your nonexistant arguments.

>>721149705
humanity would definitively engage into human-pokemon relationships since pokemon have smart enough minds, facial and body expressivity and they seem to have dog level of faithfulness, you don't even need to go to the forest, go throw some empty Monster cans to the garbage, find some cute ratata, take her home, clean her and as long as you can feed her some scraps you have a waifur for as long as she lives, she will sleep with you, you will be able to put cute dresses on her and she will even succ you wile you play, a gaming fuckbuddy, get a smeargle chick and you will finally have that 2000 point imperial guard painted (""pro painted"" grade)

>>721152059
if Pokemon where real the Indian would already had that in the Kamasutra and centuries later the British empire would turn that into a science filling entire libraries with books about that ,by now we would have new Pokemon breeds made only for human pleasure

>>721149026 (OP)
Yessir

>>721149026 (OP)
LOL No because i would get sued by nintendo

>>721149026 (OP)
I'd be comfymaxxing with my grasstype bros
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fIXqRx2hokc

>>721153657
>that pic
Fuck, that's the stuff.

>>721151229
that's Mohammed Dal-Gasi to you fucking heathen

>>721153657
There's something about sexually frustrated lizardmons that really gets my noggin joggin, that Dragonite comic by Shoutingisfun is the bee's knees.

>>721149026 (OP)
Fuck off back to your containment board
>>>/vp/

I dont know, I dont think it'd be a good world. Some pokemons, especially ghost types, would be really dangerous. Then things like Scolipede would be scary.

>>721154540
Desu I think at the very least psychic Pokemon would be 100% on the table for human/pokemon relationships, along with some other Pokemon that are incidentally capable of communicating directly, be it through telepathy, learning to speak, writing, etc. Like it's pretty fucking hard to argue that the Pokemon didn't give explicit consent when it can literally tell people that it did.

>>721157495
>what if the animal consents tho

>>721157631
Can you please post something more productive than something a bot could?
We've had the harkness test argument over and over. It's not even funny after decades of it. I tire of your rituals.

>>721157495
The majority of Pokemon seem to be sapient, although I guess it gets kind of rough around the edges for the less-communicative ones. Like they fully understand human speech but a lot of them don't really seem to have the means to communicate back.

>>721154348
if you recognize your problems (if they truly are as severe as you claim) it means you still have insight, which means there's still hope for you. Fixing it might require going out of your comfort zone. If others don't recognize or believe you have psychological problems on the other hand, then you shouldn't seek their appreciation and give yourself a break.

>>721152059
>Get to Grimer
>Catch turboAIDS
>Get to Magmar
>Die

>>721149026 (OP)
Violent sex with left.

>>721157495
I mean in the most objective ways possible, most psychic pokemons are basically just humanoids with usually incredibly elevated intelligence and focus who can use stuff like telekinesis. Its not a stretch, they're basically on par or higher than you are on the totem pole, especially with how some are full blown martial artists or levitators and more, its hard to say an Espeon can't say yes when it can also just punt you with a psychic punch or self fuck with a psychic dick.

>>721154474
Aren't there non-Pokémon animals? Moo cows or some shit?

>>721149026 (OP)
Pals >>> Pokemon

>>721152213
Indeed.

>>721149026 (OP)
10 year olds are considered legal adults in pokemon world. So yes.

>>721158589
Based

>>721158589
wings made for hug (while fug).
The problem is according to it's lore Palworld is more like a horror world specially with things like splaterina going around

>>721158669
those are nice well trained posteriors

>>721149026 (OP)
Only if female gym leaders and champions were real too

>>721158527
>its hard to say an Espeon can't say yes when it can also just punt you with a psychic punch or self fuck with a psychic dick.
It can also literally just telepath "Yes I consent to being dicked by this human, I am fully aware of what sex is and what it entails and desire to be plapped by human cock". Like any Pokemon capable of telepathy is just straight up fair game, that includes everything from Espeon to Mewtwo to Gardevoir to Lapras.

>>721158576
>Aren't there non-Pokémon animals? Moo cows or some shit?

There used to be, but that was eventually retconned. It's all Pokemon now.

>>721159403
It's pretty inconsistent which psychic types are actually telepaths. I mean, some have literal Telepathy as a hidden ability, while some others are only described to read feelings. And the anime just whips out telepathy whenever it's convenient.

>>721149026 (OP)
Nah man, I fucking hate the wilderness, probably wouldn't even own a Pokémon because of it.

>>721159689
True, I guess it would depend on what continuity you personally were in. Regardless, every continuity has at least SOME Pokemon that are capable of telepathy, as well as SOME Pokemon that are capable of human speech. Like there's options no matter where you end up.

>>721149026 (OP)
>Journey with them?

>>721157631
That is the main argument behind illegalizing bestiality, obviously there are others since it's just taboo in general
Since animals do not operate on the same level of sentience as humans, we can manipulate, or restrain them and do as we please to them, making it extremely immoral. Also from a societal sense it could spread disease or harm population growth

>>721159930
Pokemons are even living on cities, meowth, ratata, purrloin, canine based pokemon, avians... you have no excuse for not having a pokefu, just be sure to pick a low maintenance one

https://bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net/wiki/List_of_Pok%C3%A9mon_by_habitat#Urban_Pok%C3%A9mon


>>721160454
>Also from a societal sense it could spread disease or harm population growth
we call it feminism and is heavily encouraged in our institutions

>>721158141
I'd kill you for that smilefaggotry but that would require me to go outside and have other people look at me which I fucking detest, so I'll just have to let you off the hook as usual. . .

>>721150248
Yes it is, especially when they're the ones forcing me to fuck them under the threat of high-impact sexual violence.

>>721149026 (OP)
They are real, they're just called animals.

>>721149026 (OP)
Nintendo would sue you for that.

>>721159209
I can fix her