Thread 8103716

Chilling, lurking.

Everything feels it's moving fast, it feels like there is not enough time.

I have desktop icons turned off so I'm posting the paper I use.

Life feels awful recently, Nana has cancer, poorer than I've ever been, and the banks keep taking my money because I'm poor.

Unhappy relationship that I'm staying in because of a kid who I love too much to leave and only see a few days a month.

I'm sure it will get better, but god damn I need a break.

Simple. Three monitors. That's about it. Also, since when do I have to wait 60 seconds plus just to make a post?!

i have a meeting with the bosses tomorrow to talk about my recent lag in work.
i feel very torn, or lost. or listless. i dont really know where to go at this point in my life. a not so small part of me wants to get the first bus out of here and leave everyone behind. i essentially subsidize the living of a whole family that is my sibling, living in my home. and the stresses have begun to be too much; both financially and mentally. my mother wishes to leave too. i think about suicide often. not so much the killing but how'd id make others feel to know ho wclose they were to me physically and yet not be able to see how badly i want it to end and id hope my death (grim and with the use of shotgun) would haunt them and hurt them and their kids forever.
which is childish i know. and id be leaving behind a good crew of friends whom i love dearly and a dog so i cant kill myself.
i'd like to run away however, they say this is just a hump to get over, but theres just been alot of humps. i also need a break, a long good break.

Tariffs took my job away last month, and the only job to reach out to me was a scam. Money is tight, and I'm stressed. The only saving grace is playing video games with my son and being able to spend more time with my boyfriend.

The little guy in the background was drawn by my BF I like putting him in shit. And that's my cat.

Quite normal

>>8103750
Yeah it's new, creating a post is 300 secs.

>>8103748
That's tough anon, hope it gets better for you.
At least the kid make it easier to bear the burden.

>>8103752
If you don't want your sibling to live in your home why don't you tell them? if you want them there it's another thing.

A break will definitely help and help you clear your mind about suicide. It will give you hope and motivation to tackle this "hump".

>>8103810
Yet the tariffs going to save America. Hope you can find a new job,

That little guy is funny and cursed at the same time.

>>8103902
its been a few days since i posted that, and i do feel better. But they sort of have no where else to go atm, along with their family. id be kicking the whole lot of them out. i dont have the heart, plus i do care for them. its just alot of people, in such a small space, and its wearing on me.
and ill be taking a trip with some friends this weekend we'll be out of th city and hiking at a nearby nat'l park and then chilling in a small town. thank u for ur words

>>8103971
That sounds great, hope you enjoy the trip.

I understand how you feel, around 5 or 6 years back I used to live close to my family. It was such a pain when they were at our house all the time hanging around.

>>8103716 (OP)
mind sharing your wallpaper? it looks good

>>8103994
Here you go anon, enjoy.

Currently being a NEET, I kinda enjoy the isolation actually, talking pretty much only to my parents. I feel like it shouldn't feel as nice. I guess my life is in a standstill right now, though I do manage to get some things done. It's probably gonna get better later and a lot of cool things are coming, just not quite yet.

DWM

>>8103812
Ultrabased. This is what a real man's desk should look like.

>>8104037
That sounds pretty good anon.

>>8103716 (OP)
tired
recently got into linux and enjoying it

>>8104019
Isn't there a name for this sort of colour scheme? Grok or something?

>>8104093
Gruvbox

I feel pretty tired. Adderall hasn't kicked in yet.

Not much going on, like my desktop, but I guess is better than being sad.

>>8104127
Yeah, that's it. Thanks, anon.

>>8104127
Yeah gruvbox is such a chill and cozy color scheme and you almost have it every where.

Unfortunate, do take for a condition or no?

>>8104148
True, not much going is always better than getting the flue. After few years I finally got the flue and it's not fun

>>8104226
Yeah I went overboard and put it everywhere.

And yes I have severe ADHD. I went undiagnosed most of my life and didn't even think it was a real thing until I decided to go back to college as an adult while working full time. With the insane workload, it quickly became clear to me that adhd is real and I definitely have it. I got a prescription for it and as much as I hate to have a dependency on the stuff, it's incredibly effective. It turned my life around. I regret not getting it sooner.

>>8103716 (OP)
I want to use linux but I'm a bottom of the barrel subhuman retard ape with a very limited knowledge of computers. What do I need to know generally before I try it?

>>8103716 (OP)
I need that wallpaper

>>8104381
Damn that sounds great.

>I regret not getting it sooner.
I too have to go do the test for it, even have the letter of doc but idk, couldn't get around to it.
For now using coffee as the substance to help.

>>8104392

Here:
>>8104019

>>8104392
I found it online looking up Hyundai Schematics Wallpaper.

>>8104396
Nvm, looks like I'm late, gay and obsolete lol.

Simple DWM

>>8104391
As natural selection taught us, fuck around and find out.

BUT DO NOT NUKE YOUR WINDOWS.

Try basic Linux systems on virtual machines and see for your self. Let your curiosity guide you.
There are documentation for everything.

When you get to the point that you like it and are comfortable with using Terminal or just normal use, "Dual Boot" it next to your windows. Then you can get the smooth use of Linux with your hardware.

If got to the point that you can use terminal's basic commands and know what they do and like to program and write some script, try arch(MASSIVE DOCUMENTATION).

Also try ricing your system on different window/tile/desktop managers. You can get other's config that looks nice to you. You can then look at their config files to see how they did it and how you could do it. Then make yours or you can read the wikis and do it you self.
If you didn't read all of this..... Documentations won't help you. Watch Youtube guides and use simple OS's like Mint, Manjaro, Ubuntu or Cutefish.

TLDR: try linux on virtual machine and see if it's your cup of penguin cum.

>>8104397
>>8104396
Unlucky XD

>>8104399
Thanks.

>>8104400
Well I did find higher res versions.

>>8104411
The difference is probably irrelevant because it was already high res but nevertheless, it's there.

>>8104411
>>8104412
The point being the pape was in the colorscheme of the rice

>>8104413
I see. I had nightime mode on for my computer screen so I couldn't discern the difference. Me dumb.

>>8104391
Can i have the wallpaper file or link?

>>8104434
Yes.

>>8103716 (OP)
trying out an all amoled setup

>>8104442
and working on a small game

>>8104437
>22
Thanks.

>>8104414
Still your effort to find it was appreciated.

>>8104442
>>8104443
That's cool. What is the game about?

Ok a little random question, what font do you use for your Japanese?
I reinstalled my system and my number one in Japanese looks half dead.

>>8104443
What editor is that one looks cool

>>8104398
wallpaper file or link please? It looks do darn pleasing.

>>8104551
It's Neovim or maybe Vim.

I saved my very old laptop with Mint :3

>>8104482
>That's cool. What is the game about?
it is a 1d version of pacman. i am calling it pacline
>what font do you use for your Japanese?
I am using Iosevka Nerd Font everywhere

>>8104551
it is neovim

>>8104603
Power of Linux

>>8104713
>i am calling it pacline
Cool but how will that work? won't all the ghosts just head towards you?

>>8104713
>Iosevka
Yeah I'm using the same font.

>>8104777
>Cool but how will that work? won't all the ghosts just head towards you?
https://arlagames.itch.io/paku-paku-c64
>Yeah I'm using the same font.
make sure it is patched with nerd fonts for glyphs support

>>8104789
fun game. well done anon

>>8104227
wtf is the flue?

>>8104442
What laptop?

Been using Manjaro for a little bit now - my first Linux distro.

>>8104391
The shell (bash) (aka using the terminal) learn the basic commands and just the concept that anything can be done through the shell.

That and using the package manager to install software

Caught in a loop of endless solitude

>>8104895
Resist and disregard the naysayers that will inevitably try to convince you that Manjaro is bad.

I've been using it myself for a couple of years on a spare PC set up in a different room, zero issues and it just keeps on running.

>>8103748
Hang in there bro! The despair and sadness will level out eventually!

>>8104953
When I started to try linux and daily drive, I installed Manjaro. It is a fun operating system and easy to use but holy shit Nvidia drivers were pain to figure out. Rebooting and seeing the black screen was not fun.

I switched to ubuntu until I got the courage to install arch.

>>8104950
Same here. But I sought the solitude, sought the comfort in being alone.

I feel Good Enough. I'm glad I'm alive.

>>8105002
The drivers just work now. I use the iso with them baked in and have zero issues.

>>8105008
Damn but I guess I have to thank the broken Nvidia drivers for making me mess with Linux lol.

>>8105006
That sounds good, enjoy life anon.

Well I feel decent enough...
Fuck Windows 11, thanks you Explorer Patcher & rainmeter.
I'd like to find the artist that made this wallpaper, I love what he does :)

>>8105115
https://www.mattvince.com/product/zelda-wind-waker-wallpaper-4-pack/

I think the artist name is Matt Vince hence the logo on the pape "MV".

the wallpaper changes over time

>>8103812
Why does the bettery icon looks so different and wierd?

>>8104148
>Captura de pantalla

>>8105179
Thank you so much bro for the website of the artist ! Guess I'm gonna cycle between all 4 wallpapers and check in details his website !
Cheers mate !

>>8105191
Cool

starting to get over working restaurants, I used to genuinely enjoy it but nowadays i don't make enough and it's more stressful than what it's worth. been thinking about getting a "real" career but I never got a degree or even had a "dream job" I wanted to work towards so I don't even know where to start... i just know it's probably time to grow up

>>8105227
No problem, enjoy.

>>8105229
Yeah it is rough with nowadays economy everywhere.

What hobbies do you have? maybe try finding jobs that intersect with your hobbies so you can enjoy working. Maybe it will become your dream job.

>>8105231
it's kinda crazy I've changed almost nothing with my expenses and I went from making comfortable money to just enough in such a short time.

I looked into some stuff, I like repairing hardware on pcs/phones/old game systems but not many of those kinds of places around.
My real dream job is more just one that pays alright and gives me enough free time to do things I want to do. I'd honestly probably be fine with some random 9-5 corporate job as long as I can live relatively comfortably

>>8105233
Ikr.

I see, what you are looking for should be every job but unfortunately the world sucks.

To be honest it is sad seeing most of people don't have a dream job and wishing for something that everybody wants. Society is fucked.

thx mate

>>8105233
How much do you make currently and what is your approximate goal?

>>8104442
is that irc?

>>8103716 (OP)
invigorated, focused. Can't stop learning, I got alot of red tape to do today. Remaking my workout routine to better suit my new goals now that I've stepped away from fighting for the time being. I'm gonna get started on making an encrypted p2p chat client for me and my friend to shitpost on tonight, I dont know alot but I think I'll learn lots doing this.

>>8104391

we can tell you are bottom of the barrel by your desktop don't even bother.

>>8105224
Así es amigo mío

I feel like shit, suicidal thoughts and I have exams soon, like future deciding exams.

I put light colors so as not to end up more depressed.

>>8105468
That's nice. My advice, don't get burned out and take care.

>encrypted p2p
Sounds interesting, what language are you going to write it in? And what encryption method you going to use?

>>8105510
Exams are stressful. Good night sleep and good food will 100% help you study well for them.

Is everything ok? why do you feel like shit?
I would say it is normal to have suicidal thoughts, everyone going through tough times get those thoughts.
Why do you think ending it is worth it?

>>8105511
Will the color make any difference?
Won't you go blind with bright lights at night?

>>8105301
I make around 45k a year but I have very minimal expenses so that was always more than what i needed.
I don't really have a money goal, for my life anything more than even 60k would be plenty.

but with no degree and no experience outside of restaurants I kinda set my self up for failure here

Borrowing my mum's laptop to apply for some jobs; looking for a wallpaper first. I run arch on my own desktop and debian on my laptop though.

>graduate uni(CS), get a decent job
>move to a new town, no friends
>get into a cycle of playing vidya and wanking while smoking weed all day
>become less functional over the course of 5 years
>no longer performing my job properly
>tension building in relationship over my issues
>lose job
>lose gf
>move back in with parents
>been unemployed now for a year

Only stopped the cycle recently, with the aide of a lot of mental health help. Being sober and clear thinking for the first time in 5 years has really made everything crash for me. I'm lonely; I cut off my friends over the years. I don't have a job and have a lot of anxiety about getting back into work. I have no real hobbies. I have nothing to show for my 20's. I'm restless, bored, anxious and lonely all the time. All of these thoughts and feelings have been building for years and I think I need to feel them now to get off my ass.


>>8104391
Biggest downside is you can't play FPS games that use kernel level anticheat. Hunt still works though.

>>8105559
someone I know IRL worked front of house for a few years, then in the kitchen for a few more. Currently she's prepping to do a course that will teach her to help set up new restaurants and get them off the ground.

Weather's too fucking hot and it's not even summer yet
But life's good these days

>>8106040
I'm happy for you. It is hard to break out of a cycle but when you do you should be careful not to relapse. Other than that it needs a lot of courage and commitment to do what you did.

Feeling your feelings is tough. Trying to understand them and think about why you feel what you feel will help you find a solution and help you in general.

Captcha: GTATA

>>8106041
Yeah, weather is warm. Here weather is bipolar, one day is so hot you catch on fire, other day is raining and cold.

>>8106041
can you post that pape without your desktop background?

>>8103716 (OP)
Feelin good after spending a few days with SteamOS on my primary desktop. Replaced Win10 instead of moving to 11. No regrets, everything runs better

>>8104443
font?

DWM,
Wallpaper is from the Pointillism thread
>>8056303

Feeling pretty good. I've gotten myself a job and a girl within 2 weeks. Hope all you anons are doing okay as well.

>>8106040
Shit will get better, my downtime was three and a half years. I don't want to get too personal but nofap and the gym really helped me with anxiety and also helped my mood a lot.

is it almost over?

>>8106399
You tell me.

>>8104564
here

>>8103716 (OP)
tired but that's life

i use wallpaper carousel so my widgets sometimes don't look good

I want to kill myself.

>>8105229
Stop thinking in terms of "dream job", and start thinking in constraints: What do you like doing? What do you dislike doing? What do you want to get out of your job? In doing so, what will you refuse to ever do?
The goal isn't to get a perfect job, a perfect salary, or whatever. That's a recipe for misery, and you'll spend a lot of time doing absolutely miserable shit and never achieve the goal. Instead, define your boundaries, and your path will appear before you.

>>8106672
Specs?

>>8106191

Damn that's a commitment. I thought it came out only for handled devices.

How is your experience going?

>>8106244
I'm glad for you. I'm feeling better and putting things back together one step at a time.

I saw a similar idea of painting in museum but with parallel lines. It is interesting to see well placed parallel lines/dots make a beautiful painting.

>>8106399
Perhaps.

Love the wallpaper.

>>8106657
Why?

Two weeks since my last suicide attempt. I was talked down from it by two very dear friends. I'm trying to focus on my friends to find the strength to soldier on.

It's nice that you're replying to every post here. You're a nice person.

>>8106832
Stop trying to kill yourself, doofus. There's a lot to live for, yet.

>>8106832
Stop fapping, go to the gym and go into nature as often as possible. Forget women for a while. It is that simple.

love Openbox

>>8106864
I don't fap, I go for a short walk every day, and don't care for a relationship, whether it be woman, man, alien, whatever. I don't feel like sharing my sob story here but it's not just "boo hoo I'm so sad because no gf."

>>8104037
have i seen you on youtube before?
if so kys
if not still

>>8106708
I'm in college for a degree i hate. It's been 3 years already and I haven't managed to hang myself. Also just got an internship. I'm an amateur MMA fighter. Last victory was really good against a high level opponent. Coach says I have to lock in, he's gonna make me turn pro next year. I'm training at two places along with normal strength training at a regular gym. Grew up in a broken family. Short on money. I'm just tired dog. Everything in my body hurts. Everyday I wake up to get embarrased everyday, get brain damaged, all to be no gf no friends no future no life loser. I'm wasting my youth while Chad is partying and making memories. I'm gonna have to start taking new combinations of drugs so I don't sperg out in an office setting or while I'm being squished between wagies on public transport.
And I've probably given enough information to be profiled whining to strangers on an anonymous imageboard where nobody cares.
>>8106998
Me too. I'd like something more barebones but for now Openbox is the best I've found.

>>8107030
you must be some kind of a schizo because I've never posted any content to youtube

>>8104953
isn't it just an arch fork? what's wrong with it?
I use arch btw

>>8104399
why not nuke windows though, that's what I did too, makes installing it easier.
Or do you mean before trying?

>>8104037
>It's probably gonna get better later and a lot of cool things are coming, just not quite yet.
i like your desktop and enthusiasm anon, cheers!

>>8106191
pape please

Feel awful boys.
Girl came into my life out of nowhere turned everything upside down and chipped away a bit of my soul.
I think I still love her, fuck.

>>8107509
what are you using for that clock top right?

>>8107599
It's a Rainmeter skin called Elegance that I got off' Deviantart ages ago.

>>8103716 (OP)
life's been chaotic as of lately; lots of work, lots of responsibilities. someone I used to talk to a lot seemed to have dipped, which stung a little, but oh well.

>>8107509
Is this explorer patcher taskbar?

>>8107896
With good mindset, suggest you the same.

>>8106644
may we have the pape?

I faire well. Construction workers are destroying and rebuilding the house next to mine own. This makes the surroundings loud and insalubrious. India is a loud country, with little regard for personal space, especially for those who cannot afford it. Men are treated as cattle. 'Tis what 'Tis.

I'm not feeling very well, I'm doing quite badly at university and I feel stupid and I feel like I'm letting my family down.

>>8107031
i am writing this because people have died trying to seek help or solace here and i will be remiss if I let this pass.
there's plenty of time to make memories - some memories are moreworthwhile than others anon.
its okay to feel down once in a while but you have to live to be able to experience more.

stop comparing to others and think of what you got. i am actively stopping myself from doing that and I can honestly say 10/10 would recommend.

times are tough? sure they always have been. we all get challenges unique to our situations and if we keep looking at others for comparison you will keep missing the lessons you ought to learn.

I can only tell you things I have experienced myself. maybe you are having issues or in a horrid situation, anon for that I am sorry that I cannot help you. but know this I will be rooting for you.

Over the past few weeks I've just got a real sense that I'm not a part of all this. I never was. I never have been. A friend described a similar feeling of looking up to the sky since he was a boy and thinking "Take me up and away from all this. I'm not at home here. This isn't where I belong."

I have a message for her when I go:
>Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing, there is a field. I will meet you there.

>>8104411
>>8104412
does anyone has images like this one but with old german cars?

>>8108294
Shut your faggit as up you retard lol. Ending it is the wost you can do idiot. Go to the gym and stop bitching you homo!!

>>8108211
dunno your exact situation but i felt like i could relate. i became depressed during college/uni to the point where i failed every class in a semester and never opened up to anyone about it even to this day. i really can't offer much advice or explain what i did but i just had to make myself snap out of it and really lock in. you'll be alright, bro.

A lot of linux users here. How do y'all fare when playing games?

>>8108410
by using proton on steam basically everything i've played runs flawlessly (can also run non-steam games with proton by adding the .exe to your library). i don't play them myself, but i've heard of issues when it comes to games with anti-cheat.

>>8108410
I play Marvel Rivals and Source games and it's all good. There are like 4-5 major games that are the deal breakers for most ppl.. I think it's cod, fortnite, lol, rainbow6, minecraft bedrock.

Overtime we get used to games going in and out of support like LoL just recently. I definitely still have my a separate SSD for Windows because of this, but from the 2010s to now holy shit Linux is crazy.

Feeling alright. Summers coming along fine, work is slowly showing constant working results from 3 Years. I just want my wife to have more freetime and maybe talk to my ass of a dad again, though im unsure if its worth it.

To the linux questions:
1. usb stick, ventoy -> .iso-data -> dual boot after secure boot deactivation -> good to go.
2. gaming was never easier with protonup-qt

>>8108407
Wallpaper please

>>8108563
here you go, bro. here's also another similar one: https://files.catbox.moe/r622v2.png

>>8106832

Please don't kill yourself your taste is immaculate.

How'd you get windows to look so good

Very basic customization but still good looking

>>8108648
>but still good looking
Nope. I doubt it ever looked good, desu.

i'll bite, here's my desktop

>>8108669 Not very literate when it comes to modifying microslop windows 11 outside of the lock screen and wallpaper. How did you get Asuka on there?

I feel fine.

>>8105115
>Renoise
based

Feeling pretty good. Lost my job last christmas, was able to live off of savings for a while. Spent my 20s doing what I wanted to do for work and had a lot of fun, but I'm over it. Now I think I'm going to pivot careers and see what happens.

Haven't really been on here since 2014 but I just did a fresh install on an old laptop and I always go to /wg/ for some papes. Glad this board has stayed the same more or less.

>>8108674
brother, i'm running Haiku, not Windows 11

Sometimes in life, you feel stuck. You think every decision you made in the past was wrong. You’ve reached a dead end, a point where you can’t seem to recover. You try new things, work harder, but still don’t get any results. You feel like you’re wasting yourself. You start doubting your own abilities. You try and try and try and fail even more miserably than before.

You know it all. You understand the situation. You realize the battle is internal, not external. No outside help is going to change that. Only you can save yourself. So you keep moving, flowing like a leaf in the windy mountains, slowly falling down and wait for the leaf to become still.

>>8108949
i like that panel, is it popOS?

>>8108963
Yup! It's popOS

>>8108963
Yup, It's popOS

Life is treating me well this year, I have improved my health, exercise, cooking, career skills. I hope to add more to my relationship and dating life.

pretty happy! i recently got a part time job, it doesnt pay well but my parents allow me to stay rent free so long as im working or going to school.

>>8109119
pic rel didnt attach

>>8109119
same for me when i was in college and starting to work. it made me realize just how dope my parents are especially when you see how other parents treat their kids as soon as they're adults.

I'm going to hell

Nothing special except the double ultrawide setup.

Everything is fine, working night shifts which are great, but I don't see my friends at all anymore.

got into linux 3 days ago and i'm loving it. even wrote myself a nice shell script to show me temps

>>8105511
I like your icon pack anon, could you tell me what it's called?

>>8109192
lmao

nothing really interesting about my desktop. i use all 3 (linux, macos, windows), but i need to upgrade my main ssd in my laptop, hence the mac.

life so far has been surreal. got a last minute internship, girl i was with broke up with me, its been an interesting couple of months. i really dig sunsets, and ive been just driving to this spot near my work right before sunset, and i just sit and watch the sunset. other than that, life has been uneventful.

>>8108211
not gonna lie, i was in the same position you were in. i felt like a disgrace to my family, especially since i struggled to get an internship my first two years, and looking at other people getting offers from pretty well respected companies was just a punch in the gut. keeping it within won't help you or anyone, it is best to open up with someone you can trust, and even though you might feel like a disgrace or letting your family down, they are always there for you. you can always lean back on them for support, and they will be there for you.

keep your head up and keep on grinding anon. don't let yourself down.

>>8107031
man im also going into my 4th year, and like you, i just got an internship. all i can tell you is to keep your head up, this time will pass. you just need to keep at it, and if you feel like MMA is the path to go, focus more on that, but don't let your education slip. comparison is the thief of happiness, and you aren't doing yourself justice comparing yourself with other people in the world. you're fighting your own battles, they're fighting their own.

keep on fighting anon, you got this.

>>8104037
love your desktop setup anon, how do i achieve this level of /comfy/???

>>8109242
I just copied this anon (pic related) who used expose blue for KDE. The blue color app theme I don't really remember the name though, I've switched to KDE since that.

>>8109249
pic related is my current setup, nothing fancy but I find a more neutral theme to be comfier for daily usage

>>8109250
cheers anon, really dig this more. reminds me of windows xp

>>8105229
wallpaper please

>>8104437
what do you think

current setup. nothing too flashy

life's alright. a bit slow, if anything. not super used to the stillness

>>8103716 (OP)
This looks awesome. How did you customize it like this.
Can you tell me anon?
I'm also new to Linux. Installed Arch Linux yesterday.

>>8109360
nta but they're using hyprland which is pretty different from a conventional desktop environment like kde or gnome. i'd recommend following a tutorial to get an idea of how it even works and making your own configurations before using someone else's.

Feels like I haven't done anything worthy, time keeps passing by at my expense, and I'm just trying to fill the hours

>>8109362
Oh okay anon. Thanks. I'll get used to Arch Linux 1st then.

Comfy morning of exercise and chores, had a small lunch, now I think I'll watch some Dark Souls videos.

>>8108644
Hahahahahaha, thank you, sweetie. I'll keep going just for you. I moved back to Linux, though. Windows is just such a hassle.

Things have improved since last month, but I don't feel any better. I don't think I want to die anymore, though, for now. I am learning how to cook, gradually moving to more technical dishes.

>>8105231
I hope one day I can join the police force; that would be cool.

This is my current wallpaper BTW.

>>8109772
acab anon. there’s selling out level working for the man, and then in another whole bootlicking level is being a cop

>>8109772
>>8109773
>get paid by the ultra rich to protect their wealth
>get paid scraps
>get shot at, screamed at, stabbed
>at least the union and retirement are sort of good

it’s definitely one of the lowest tiers of humanity… it’s always been

>>8109776
>get paid scraps
They make 6 figures, anon.

>>8109781
They totally don't. I know a cop who also had a lawn care business on the side in order to make enough money.

>>8109849
Share the wallpaper, please

>>8108767
what is that clock plugin?

It's been a rough few months, and it looks like things won't calm down for at least another month. one thing that's helped is customizing my linux setup. it gives me a sense of control. i switched back to windowmaker for a while because the configs are outdated from the switch to debian from xubuntu. as i use it i'll find things that are wrong and fix them.

>>8109741
I need that wallpaper texture so bad. Where do you find those?

Wake up, exercise, go to work, come home, jerk off, smoke, play vidya, shower, go to bed. Maybe fit going out with friends in there a few times a month. This is pretty much how Iv been living my life the past year. It’s been 2 years since Iv graduated high school and I still don’t know what what I wanna do with my life, so Iv just been working and trying to better myself. Future very uncertain.

>>8109741
Oh man i wish I could have a desktop that looked like this.

>>8104127
Can you post the paper, please? And what's this theme called?

I feel like shit

>>8103716 (OP)
heres my Windows install. I dualboot Fedora and use Win 10 LTSC to play modded Skyrim so not that much going on...
>how you feel anon
pretty good :)
I was playing but rn Im gonna browse 4chan or something...
*slurps /comfy/ tea*

>>8103716 (OP)
Sad, lonely and frustrated, missing people that left me, missing people that i left, searching girls just to feel company, procastination that kills me, i hate sex but i only want it, i hate people but i'm so fucking lonely, i was thinking on left 4chan forever, same as smoking cigarettes, but maybe both things will stay with me a long time. But i just don't want porn and prostitution on my life, not anymore

>>8110277
anyway, if someone can help me to remove the "belavin" shit i will appreciate a lot C:

>>8110155
Not him, but this is the wallpaper. It's a tiling background that's too small to post on /w/.
https://github.com/tile-anon/tiles/blob/main/341-2.png

Not him, but this is the wallpaper. It's a tiling background that's too small to post on /wg/.
https://github.com/tile-anon/tiles/blob/main/341-2.png

>>8110323
Meant for >>8110155.

>>8103716 (OP)
Is arch your main?
Gotta hop on the hyprland wave, but I know I'm gonna miss windows.

>>8110229
7-1 based

>>8109741
your bookmarks just tell me you do nothing with your life

>>8110139
do it then maybe?

>>8109741
what do you use for this?

>>8110475
just use kde since it's more or less a customizable windows as far as usage goes. if you wanna mess with hyprland you can install it and swap between them whenever.

I've been using a tiling script so I rarely see my bare desktop these days.

is there a good, retro, mac os 9 theme for kde?

>>8110480
I don't know HOW stupid

>>8103716 (OP)
2 days ago I passed out in a hospital wating room. All tests came back fine. "Stress and anxiety" the doctor said. I guess my body is finally catching up with my mind, and all the questions without answer that lie there.

Forgot to post how I feel:
Pressured, some days relief, the other days mad anger. Trying to stoic my way until the next relief stage.

>>8106244
not using vertical tabs.

>>8109249
damn if i could go back in time to when that album came out and feel the vibes to the zeitgeist back then.

now it just feels dated and melancholic.

also, funcrusher plus, and black elvis lost in space.

>>8110229
zen. well done, good job.

>>8103716 (OP)
I don't know how much longer I can bear it. Quit a steady job a couple months back. Still haven't found anything new. I don't even enjoy my hobbies anymore and I have no vision for the future.

comfy pape taxed from another thread.

>>8103716 (OP)
>tell us how you feel anon
Retarded. I'm almost a wizard and I don't have any kind of experiece with anything, so I can't apply to a good paying job; all I know is shitposting on mongolian basket weaving forums. Being in a turd-world country doesn't help either, so it's not like I can sustain myself just by working at McDonalds. The few jobs I could get in the past few years somehow paid below minimum-wage, what am I supposed to do then?

I'm enjoying life while I've still got it

>>8111112
Have you considered getting certs pertinent to something you're passionate about? For instance, you could get an RHCSA, RHCE, and some other stuff. That's more or less the career path I've taken.

>>8107028
What WM for windows is that?

Right now I'm doing alright. There isn't really a world with me. I live in my own little world. I'm happy in my own little world. I got some antidepressants and I'm doing better than I used to. I can sit here as an unemployed schizophrenic alcoholic and after all the things I've been through and survived I can say that I'm doing alright. I think my dad would be pretty proud of that. I know I am

>>8103716 (OP)
I always wanted to be a mage when I was a kid. I was very sad when I discovered that magic wasn't real. Now that time has passed, I like to engage in things that make me feel like a Wizard, such as Ricing or researching things. Currently I'm applying for a Phd

>>8110279
hope this is okay

>>8104080
Source on top right picture?

the dread of finally having to face my adult life is creeping upon me. i'll probably go to uni later this month and i've been struggling to find a job. i've tried to stay away from my endless search for a partner, yet it always pulls me back in, as always. i wouldn't say i'm sad, but i'm close. guess i'll just have to wait. i hope that you, reading this, shall find confort soon. :)

>Post your desktop
I have the day off work to prepare for a medical exam tomorrow, so I installed Linux for the first time in 12 years. Have had fun messing around with the same stuff I had back then (i3, picom, alacritty etc.) even if it's dated.

> tell us how you feel anon
Foul mood because I can't eat until tomorrow afternoon and I had an argument with le wife over something stupid. That aside, my life is generally excellent rn so I can't complain too much. I recently turned 30 and am in excellent shape, make good money, and have more or less conquered my long-standing health issues as well as some personal vices.

>>8111111
Why did you quit? Are you sure your lack of enjoyment in hobbies isn't due to you being a neet? I remember feeling detached from my interests when I had no jewb,

>>8112542
Just B urself. Strong handshake and eye contact yeah

>>8109741
Please link the wallpaper i need it badly

>>8107031
Hang in there man, I promise it gets better. I remember being in a very similar spot when i was in college. Best thing to do is remember that comparison is the thief of joy, and to work on yourself. You also have to make some very difficult decisions in terms of what you want in life. Don't want kids? Get a vasectomy. Hate where you live? Move! Hate your body? Exercise, motherfucker! And most of all, socialize. You have to keep putting yourself out there until you find people who are actually on your wavelength. And don't be so goddam hard on yourself

what is that cli tool again which u guys use to dump the setup and specs swaggy on the terminal like that? thx

>>8112808
fastfetch

>>8112818
>fastfetch
thanks m8

feeling tired but fulfilled, studying human biology for my degree, teacher makes dad jokes all class but you can tell he loves what he does so that's nice

I want to rice a theme sorta like Windows Whistler, Apple Cheetah-like. Pretty much 2001 aesthetics. Any inspo or anon that has undertaken something like this?

>>8104442
that's pure black? my eyes decieve me

>>8103810
can i get your wallpaper? it got a chuckle out of me

trying to get a job to help my sister pay rent but i don't have a car. life's hard but indomitable human spirit or some shit ig

>>8103716 (OP)
Stories like mine are a dime a dozen: guy blessed with opportunities can't make full use of said opportunities due to his own weakness, will die in complete isolation and hates his own life.
I could go on and tell my whole story but there's no point, and the fact that I have a twin brother that had the exact same opportunities as me and managed to fully make use of them, find a gf and find a job is a testament to my own failure.
I just want the sufferings to end, I don't even necessarily want to end my life. In the end I don't care about finding a job, finding a gf or even having friends. I just want to get away from society in general and live in isolation. Is that too much to ask?

>>8103716 (OP)
Life is good overall. 100k in savings, learned to drive manual last year, just got my passport recently.
However cooming is the ultimate vice, even more so than my drinking. Hoarding niche fetish porn, visiting dominatrixes, fucking prostitutes, playing H games. I can't get enough of it. There's a hole in me that it will never fill. It just wants more.
None of this actually gets in the way of me living a normal life. I maintain a good job, have a tight-nit circle of friends as well as a girlfriend, can enjoy my other hobbies and still lead a healthy lifestyle.
I've done everything that I told to do to crawl out of my incel stage in my teens and early 20s, and yet I don't feel like I've "ascended". Missing out on teenage love really damages you, even if you manage to BTFO everyone else later on.

>>8110636
Looks like he's on i3blocks based on the open window on the far left

life is good boys, things are looking up. Just finished paying off the last of my student loans today, starting a long weekend, had a good fantasy draft, bought myself some flowers. Got cheated on last month but hey it's not so bad being single. Thinking I'll play some games this weekend.

Hope things improve for the rest of y'all.

>>8113788
Anon ill pray for you, I've been there. i went to church to try and find a trad gf to fill my emptiness and that sex fatigue from tinder and hookers. Ended up doing a deep dive on Christianity and became a believer.
>There's a hole in me that it will never fill. It just wants more.
Hate to be that guy but find God bro, got me a wife and kids, got raises i never thought were in my reach, and found actual true happiness

Does anyone use wallpaper engine? i make custom wallpapers all the time and they all move and interact and are customizable.

>>8104391
use mint

>>8103716 (OP)
thinking about breaking up with my girlfriend. Feel like things have sort of been moving backwards, and she doesn't really give a fuck about our relationship. Other than that, I'm feeling pretty happy.

What do you guys think I'm relatively new to ricing linux

it's been years since I touched my rice. I basically stopped caring since I started using kde

>>8107509
take my unsolicited advice, focus on you and the right person will want to share it with and you will share theirs. Simple, sweet, no fuss. No one will save you from you, the world is dead, we killed it, but you'll be better if you try and someone will love you for your effort.

Heghlu'meH QaQ jajvam

I've got a lot of optimism and hope right now. On Monday I'm starting a full time course at my local college. It'll all be people around my age so I hope to make some friends and finally get a new gf. This year has been one of the worst years of my life, mainly due to the fallout of my last relationship that ended around this time last year. I'm schizophrenic and I've been suffering from frequent suicidal depression and recurring psychosis since last September. It's only in the last few months that things have changed. I've got back on antidepressants and that's helped significantly. I have a drinking problem but I'm working hard at quitting. I'm getting counselling for it and I'm currently 11 days dry.

I'm hoping that this is the time now when things turn around and I can enjoy some good life again. If it all goes to shit then I'll probably go completely crazy and it'll be Christmas in the loony bin. But here we go.

Remember frens, it's not too late to change your hikikomori ways

>>8112542
me again, some weeks later and i did get into uni, and i did get a job. still very nervous about both but i hope it'll all go well

can't say the same for the partner part. i've met this girl, we were kind of clicking, we had sex and i lost all interest. i'm starting to think i might be asexual, to be honest. we'll see how things go in uni and i'll try to be more "down to heart" with girls without trying to get into their pants lol

hope everyone gets well soon, it gets better :)

>>8114674
stay strong brother. 11 days is a huge fucking milestone :)

>>8114576
try to figure it out, always, even if it hurts. communication is key, and that's the harsh truth. be honest to her about what's going on inside your head

>>8113788
vices are hard. i struggle with porn addiction myself. it does affect you in various ways, even if subconsciously. one day at a time, one less fap. you're the one who's gotta get yourself out of that hole, alone.

>>8114690
>11 days is a huge fucking milestone :)
Thanks man. Today is day 13. Longest I've gone since this bullshit started

>>8114689
THere no such thing as a-sexual or any, there gay or straight you fucking retard!! You didnt met a girl that exites you enough to fuck all the time thats why. It can take a while to meat one if you dont go out. Expecting one to fall in your lap is not how it works stupid!! Just remeber that

>>8103716 (OP)
general sadness over my past relationship, made worse by uncertainty of job future. have been single for 3 years now, will be 32 years old in a couple months. feeling time slipping and wanting to have family and children, but i can't support them.

today was productive

Autistic

I'm the middle of three brothers. We're all either late 20s or early 30s, and have never really had girlfriend experience. Dad is dead, and mom doesn't say much, but I wonder if she's upset at us for not being more successful in this regard. We're all on the introverted side, to one degree or another. Oldest bro is by far the biggest sperg. I can present myself well, but am very avoidant. Little bro is probably the closest to being normal: he's the most social. I'm worried mom will latch on to him as the best chance to get grandchildren. She wouldn't be wrong to do so, it's just that thinking about all this reminds me of the fact that I am quite lonely. I make the most money of us three, but I'm a boring tech wagie. I don't have adventures, no sex, etc. I dream of being some kind of ideal person, someone heroic.

>>8116100
I'm new to nix: what is the program that you have that's displaying CPU usage and such

>>8116103
Welcome to the fun. It's called btop. There's also htop, nvtop, and radeontop. The latter 2 are for GPU's specifically.

>>8116106
Thanks fren, very cool

>>8114645
Nice, but I'd choose another font for terminal/ranger
>>8110723
Once I was admitted to a clinical ward because I had the flu and I thought my symptoms were similar to meningitis. all tests were negative and I had an intense Headache after a lumbar puncture. I'm a psych doctor, so I felt ridiculous after that.
>>8109741
Based

>>8103716 (OP)
I feel a weird mix of indifference and excitement towards life. Work is a pain, and college is a bore. My backlog keeps growing, and I don’t have enough time to pick a show or game before going back to bed and starting all over again. I want to save up to eventually buy a PC or a console, but I find it hard to justify spending so much money on something I won’t get to use much. Yeah… nowadays, only food and the few seasonal anime I watch bring me joy.

>>8116168
i relate to you so much...just livin day by day it feels.

feeling okay, its getting late and i have to get up early for work tomorrow but whatever. i work tomorrow then get the next two days off with my husband that i'm looking forward too <3

>>8105468
>under
>heat
>intra
>sector

>>8116108
kys, pronto, gamer.

>>8113727
Post wallpaper please

>>8105510
wallpaper pls?

>>8117014
Immoral, degenerate pedophile.

>>8105229
I went down that road as well, I worked in a variety of restaurants to get through college, then some time after.

>I used to genuinely enjoy it but nowadays i don't make enough and it's more stressful than what it's worth.

Exactly, I loved being a part of the team even though I had the shittiest job, but it got old when I was more stressed than I was in college, and was making almost no money.

>been thinking about getting a "real" career but I never got a degree or even had a "dream job" I wanted to work towards so I don't even know where to start

You need to get out of the food industry before you get pigeon holed, it sucks and it will never get better. I wish I had some more useful advice to give, but I'd say go learn a trade, anything is better than restaurant work.

Sorry for the long reply, I saw myself in your post is all. Hope it gets better.


Nice desktop, I've been thinking of giving KDE another try.

>>8103716 (OP)
Giving Cosmic desktop a try,
It's not bad, but it definitely has a way to go before "show time"

> and tell us how you feel anon

To tell the truth, things are going "OK" , I'm about to travel to Korea with my girlfriend. My job is becoming stressful (teacher) and I'm not sure if I want to do it anymore, but don't feel like I can easily change careers.

>>8117031
Gamer faggot. The stresses you have can be traced to your bing bing woohoo gaming addiction. Stop at once.

>>8117033
I dont really game much, but eat a bag of baby dicks with your shitty attitude though :)

feeling good, gonna go to bed soon.

trying to keep chill, work about to get really busy so trying to avoid stress.

>>8103716 (OP)
I feel excited.

College is going well, third year is challenging (but not in a bad way). My extra-curriculars are more demanding than my academics. Time and resource management are stressors (not in a bad way).

Had to break up with the gee eff about a month ago, she was my first real girlfriend. A very pretty and wonderful young lady; religious, conservative, fit, so so smart, beautiful white teeth, etc. I could go on and on.

Unfortunately, she realized she does not want to move out of the state after completing college and would like to die in the same town she was born in. This is absolutely incompatible with my future career and dream. We met at a park to discuss the matters. When we arrived we both knew how it would end, neither of us willing to sacrifice what was necessary.

Ultimately, I am not going to give my prospective success, my dream, away for a lady. I did not shed a single tear, but it is a strange feeling knowing so much about someone that is no longer in my life (except for a class we still both share, lol).

Parents are both retired now, sibling started attending a very nice college recently.

I have been reading a lot, science fiction mainly.

Everything happens for a reason I am sure.

I don't even know really, just stressed I guess.

chillin

I don't really know what I feel anymore, except anger. I have nothing to show for the past decade. I am poorer, sadder, more isolated, more dependent, less productive, less passionate, less inspired, angrier, and stupider than I was a ten years ago. My work appears to be no closer to its long-term goals. I'm still beholden to the same vices (pornography, laziness, internet distraction, cowardice), and I'm still sighing over the same relationship that never was.

A recent data loss left me without my creative works of the past 7 years, and I've lost around 98% of my net assets. I was planning a new business when the capital to get started vanished. Health issues make it somewhat dubious whether I will be able to continue in my chosen work. Before that, a head injury left me forgetful and mentally weak. I used to be able to think about problems, contend with them, and solve them. Now, my mind slides off the surface of any problem I try to think about, and I hardly even notice, or care for long when I do notice. I don't know what to do or how to proceed with anything in life; I can't figure out what is best, and I don't know if what I've been doing all this time was a mistake or if I just need to keep doing it and endure the consequences.

Some people might be suicidal in my position, but I'm not. Those thoughts and fantasies have come and gone for so long that I don't take them seriously much anymore. I recognize them as the thoughts of an attention-seeking child. On the contrary, I believe in the holy merit of suffering. To a well-ordered Christian, suffering is a gift from God: an invitation to join Him in His eternal sacrifice. I have asked for suffering, and I have what I have asked for. I don't regret the asking, I don't need all the problems to go away, but I wish I didn't let myself get angry and sad over them, and wallow in the anger. I wish I could bear all this well. I wish I could figure out what to do.

Anon, thank you for the best feels thread in years.

>>8104391
you won't be able to play Fortnite anymore (and that's a good thing)

i kinda just don't feel real.

>>8108669
where did u get this theme for Falkon?

>>8109265
pape pls?

Living just in case things get better. Music gets me through the day.

I have everything I have ever wanted. I don't really want to continue living and see it all fall apart
Also psychologist said that I may be depressed, but I think it is just my personality desu

>>8113727
wallpapers, please

>>8117659

Your taste in games suggests you've got good taste in music.

>>8117578
why dont you feel real anon ?
Nice desktop btw

>>8103716 (OP)
insanely basic

>>8118056
forgor pic

Almost 30. Quit drugs recently as a lifelong fiend and suffering pretty bad with the dopamine rebound. Food, masturbation don't feel good. Tried gaming again.. can't games for more than 10-20 minutes.

I cook fresh meals for 20-30 minutes most of the week - it's beautiful how it takes my mind off everything. But then it's done and take a few bites I can't enjoy it much. I'm just glad my family enjoys it and have them eat something healthy instead of the cancerous slop in the supermarkets.

I found working out is the closest thing to getting high. Instant endorphine rush, no emotional comedown, no shame. Calisthenics is the shit. But I can't do it 8 hours everyday, so I'm always looking for that "something". If anyone can share what helped them in drug abuse recovery, I'd love to hear. Thanks

>>8118166
here's the pape from reactOS. Upscaled to 1440p by a very cool guy on this board

>>8118167
*KolibriOS
Linux brain rot too many OS to remember

>>8118166
Sounds like you are on the right path. Anxiousness is hitting hard but that's normal after an abrupt change of habits and eliminating the instant escapism method.

Just keep on going brother, things will get better when you are not looking

>>8118171
Thanks man, just needed to be heard. No so great at delivering this info verbally

>>8118202
can't complain, not too much going on

Max comfy achieved

I am in search of good horror papes

>>8118490
Is that SSX 3? Luv that game.

I've just been really stressed and unfulfilled lately and also a good friend is moving to another city quite far away so i won't be able to see them for a long while

>>8118545
Yup, it's pretty fun

>>8118542
Looks really clean, anon

Any info on your setup?

>>8103716 (OP)
I feel blessed anon

>>8119189
yov vse mac desu

>>8119189
hey twin ;3

Goodnight, sweet thread.

>>8118886
What % of your interactions are with said friend?