Thread 40877781

I find that I am inexplicably drawn to the act of apologising. I am constantly apologising to people in my day-to-day life, even for shit that is clearly not my fault. My immediate knee-jerk reaction to any inconvenience I am involved in whether it was caused by me or the other party involved is always to apologise. I feel some kind of perpetual, pervading sense of guilt looming over my head basically at all times. Even my sexual fantasies since as far back as I can remember have revolved around apology, I'm more interested by the idea of kneeling at a woman's feet and begging forgiveness for some nondescript transgression than I am by the thought of actual intercourse. In my whole life it's like I'm desperate for absolution for something and I don't even know what.

It's probably just from cripplingly low self-esteem, but I had a thought a couple days ago, half-jokingly, that I must have committed some heinous, despicable deed in a past life which is why I am the way I am. But now I'm seriously wondering, could that actually the case? How could I go about finding out?

>>40877781 (OP)
Eat some meat and lift some weights. /fit/ would be better for you.

>>40877781 (OP)
Damn that breakdancing dude must've ran over her whole family

>>40877781 (OP)
Meditation. There's a book called "Knowing and Seeing" by Pa-Auk Sayadaw. It's based on a classic Buddhist meditation manual called Vissudhimagga. Part of the various instructions include how to discern past lives.
https://dhammatalks.net/Books13/Pa-Auk-Sayadaw_Knowing-and-Seeing-4th-Ed-2010.pdf
I don't know if that'll help your particular condition right now, but good luck.

>>40877781 (OP)
Go on google and search psychic mediums near me or past live regressionist and local psychics near you will pop up that you can book in-person sessions with that should be able to look into your past lives or you can try to do it yourself with guided past life regression hypnosis meditation videos on YouTube. Chances are you did either do something extremely bad to females in your past life or you could've been just really compassionate and understanding to females like a pope or a counselor or a doctor or something and that trait is just bleeding through. You were probably a womanizer or a rapist or beat your wife or something in your past life and now in this life you're extremely apologetic and subservient to females to even out the karma. You need past life regression done and past life therapy. Once you get the regression done (correctly) and understand what the situation is you'll know how to get closure from it and move on and stop feeling that way and apologizing.

https://youtu.be/cdAD12peW2c?si=GpwgIKaD6ZDOv962

https://youtu.be/VpcqXwtjiIU?si=faiq5nyhKZYCakDl

https://youtu.be/rAgcbBW1dnM?si=ljghiA_xXAE61_dP

https://youtu.be/-MUaArf9K8Y?si=YvGyvwJFM7RGmjY8

>>40877781 (OP)
you are a good lad. my friend is as same as you. it suggests that your bloodline is not a cannibal (thats from thousands of years). hope you find peace always. cheers.

>>40877781 (OP)
You think this is a flaw?
Easy
Own up to it
Defend it

>>40877781 (OP)
Even if you did horrible things in your past life forgive yourself and move on. Heal if you need to but you have a different slate now.