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Thread 41313517

122 posts 38 images /x/
Anonymous No.41313517 >>41313533 >>41313638 >>41313668 >>41313676 >>41313691 >>41313698 >>41313739 >>41313956 >>41314131 >>41314152 >>41314233 >>41314239 >>41314301 >>41314655 >>41315892 >>41316309 >>41316762 >>41316806 >>41317182 >>41319396 >>41319858 >>41323723 >>41325343 >>41325925 >>41326784 >>41327779 >>41329570 >>41329902 >>41330511 >>41334461
Do I have what it takes to become a vampire? I want to live forever. I know vampires browse this board.
Anonymous No.41313533 >>41313538
>>41313517 (OP) What is your blood type?
Anonymous No.41313538
>>41313533
A-
Anonymous No.41313638
>>41313517 (OP)
yes
Anonymous No.41313668 >>41323693
>>41313517 (OP)
Let's use some common sense, do you really want to become immortal and be stuck forever and ever in that 4/10 under 6 foot no muscle vessel you're inhabiting right now?
Anonymous No.41313676
>>41313517 (OP)
Anonymous No.41313691
>>41313517 (OP)
Truly the darkest form of necromancy, to force such an unfortunate to bear such a countenance into eternity. Just kill yourself and reincarnate as literally anything but you.
Anonymous No.41313698
>>41313517 (OP)
Truly this must be the face of an ageless monster
Anonymous No.41313739 >>41313758 >>41313858
>>41313517 (OP)
What skills do you have?
Anonymous No.41313758 >>41313787 >>41313903 >>41314661
>>41313739
I am lonely and unlikeable.
Anonymous No.41313787 >>41313839
>>41313758
With that mindset, you wouldn't survive the first night faggot
Anonymous No.41313803
sorry we only accept alphas
Anonymous No.41313839
>>41313787
But surely these qualities made me an ideal candidate to be a vampire larper?
Anonymous No.41313858
>>41313739
I'm more intelligent than the average person and have a lot of discipline.
Anonymous No.41313903
>>41313758
And turning into a blood-drinking serial murderer would fix that, of course, I see your logic.
Anonymous No.41313956 >>41329603
>>41313517 (OP)
Anonymous No.41314131 >>41314505 >>41314511 >>41315076 >>41315085 >>41315100
>>41313517 (OP)
Yes, I am a vampire. I can help.
HOW TO BECOME VAMPIRE INSTRUCTIONS:
1. Find nearest train station.
2. Go to a crossroads of the rail lines.
3. Close your eyes, tight. Do not open them no matter what you hear.
4. You will hear what sounds like a train coming.(this could take hours.)
E. Spread your body out on the track as wide as you can, face upward, eyes still closed.
6. You will feel our fangs in your neck.
7. You might feel a slight evisceration as the train runs you over. (If the ritual worked, you will vapour form away from the train.)
8. ???
9. Profit!
Anonymous No.41314152
>>41313517 (OP)
How many vampire books have you read0?
Anonymous No.41314233
>>41313517 (OP)
What do you imagine it takes to become a vampire?
Anonymous No.41314239
>>41313517 (OP)
Why do you want to live forever?
Anonymous No.41314301 >>41314370 >>41314645 >>41314665
>>41313517 (OP)
I am a real vampire. Ask me whatever you want nigglet.
Anonymous No.41314354 >>41314420
Slay all vampires. Slam dunk vampire heads into the trash. Drop kick vampire girls in the stomach. Curbstomp vampires. Pierce every vampire to the ground with a silver sword.
Anonymous No.41314370 >>41314412
>>41314301
Not OP, but you single or in a vampire group?
Anonymous No.41314412 >>41314764 >>41314811
>>41314370
No no if you're OP you have to admit come on I'll be nice.
Anonymous No.41314420
>>41314354
Hells yeh! Damn vampuires
Took muh jewrb
Anonymous No.41314438
bruh u dont need to become a vampire you need a fuxking face reconstruction surdgery and TRT and some sort of fuckig meds im telling you this shit is not looking good hope u take my advice or u can also fentmaxx your existance will just remain fkn misserable
Anonymous No.41314505
>>41314131
>our

I know it's a shitpost, but why did he say our?
Anonymous No.41314511 >>41314645
>>41314131
vampyre here. can confirm, this method works.
Anonymous No.41314645
>>41314301
>>41314511
Also a vampyr and I can also confirm
Anonymous No.41314655
>>41313517 (OP)
Nigga vampire is an extreme form of cope, let me help you: you're trans.
Anonymous No.41314661
>>41313758
Go become a woman so you're not unlikeable anymore, get fucked by men and you'll never be lonely again kek.
Anonymous No.41314665 >>41314685 >>41314733
>>41314301
Not OP, but where can a nigga meet a latina roja vampira? Argentina?
Anonymous No.41314685 >>41314709
>>41314665
OP the fact that you keep having to clarify that you're not OP in this shitfest of a thread as if anyone gives a shit tells me that not only it's you but that you feel self-conscious about your gaming cave dweller mountain dew chugging physiognomy which others have pointed out at length.
Anonymous No.41314709 >>41314717
>>41314685
Dumbass nigger, I'm not the brownoid OP; I'm actually based.
Anonymous No.41314717
>>41314709
Whoa
Anonymous No.41314733 >>41325773
>>41314665
Here's your vampire latina bro
Anonymous No.41314764 >>41315248
>>41314412
Sadly I'm not OP. He's better than me in the vampire stuff. He will become a vampire servant which is better than being a lame human.
Anonymous No.41314811 >>41315256 >>41318360
>>41314412
Okay, I'm OP. Bite me.
Anonymous No.41315076
>>41314131
This. My body has never been the same since trai- I mean since the vampiric ritual. But I get along fine.
Anonymous No.41315085
>>41314131
>our fangs
Anonymous No.41315100 >>41315861
>>41314131
Everyones talkin bout the our fangs thing here but no ones talkin bout how anon put e instead of a 5 on the list
Anonymous No.41315248
>>41314764
Aren't vampire servants just humans? Either way I mean, I agree, he has at least the face of a servant. Maybe he won't be a vampire but he could be a vampire simp.
Anonymous No.41315256
>>41314811
Only boy heartthrobs and angel-faced goth girlies mate, sorry. Try to hit the gym and looksmaxx then post again?
Anonymous No.41315861
>>41315100
everyone asks what are our fangs but nobody asks HOW are our fangs
Anonymous No.41315892 >>41319561 >>41322340
>>41313517 (OP)
Anon, I’m going to be honest with you you have to have RH negative.
The Rh negative blood type is a classification in the human blood system where the Rh factor protein is absent from red blood cells. People with this type can face complications in pregnancy if their partner has Rh positive blood. It is less common than Rh positive, can occur with any ABO blood type, and some studies suggest it may influence immune responses, helping defend against certain viruses while also affecting susceptibility to others. Yes, roughly 1 percent of the global population has AB negative blood, which is the rarest combination of ABO and Rh negative. More broadly, about 15 percent of people worldwide are Rh negative, but exact percentages vary by region and ethnicity.
>ok, and?
What people and witches of old would call a curse is actually a virus that put’s such strain on your body that you unlock dormant evolutionary traits. However theres only a one percent chance you’ll survive and turn otherwise you get blood clots, heart failure, literal disintegration, the autophage is extreme but the more of a person you consume the more you look hunger albeit old vampires cant hide certain traits like eye bags, gray hair and even wrinkles. Modern vampires subside off of blood except for some really rich and elite ones.
Anonymous No.41316297
Realz vampir here jus wan say, you are gay hahahaha (I jerked off to my ex again)
Anonymous No.41316309 >>41325260
>>41313517 (OP)
I’d suck you bro, no cap
Anonymous No.41316762 >>41317127
>>41313517 (OP)
Are you good at seeing the bigger picture/perspective? Less good at seeing the details?
Anonymous No.41316806
>>41313517 (OP)
no uglies allowed sorry
Anonymous No.41316817
total vampire death
Anonymous No.41317127 >>41318383 >>41327918
>>41316762
I see details.
Anonymous No.41317182
>>41313517 (OP)
Not in this life no.
Anonymous No.41318360
>>41314811
Ok OP just be around at nighttime so we can talk about your skillset and how you can contact your city's vampire loge.
Anonymous No.41318383 >>41318425
>>41317127
You don't seem interested, honesly, like if you're going to reply with 3-word sentences at least have the decency to be a 10/10 20-something girl. Otherwise, effort is required.
Anonymous No.41318425 >>41318433 >>41318475 >>41318558 >>41319624 >>41325267
>>41318383
Simple. I read your aura and can tell you're not a vampire so I don't need reply with effort.
Anonymous No.41318433
>>41318425
You're didn-t reply to the same anon from yesterday.
Anonymous No.41318475 >>41319086
>>41318425
Can you read my aura?
Anonymous No.41318558
>>41318425
Maybe you should've disclosed you got Auspex from the beginning, a vampire might have noticed
Anonymous No.41319086
>>41318475
Not a vampire.
Anonymous No.41319396 >>41319463
>>41313517 (OP)
You'll never be one of us buddy.......
Anonymous No.41319463
>>41319396
Come on, give him a chance, he's got really moxy, real chops
Anonymous No.41319561
>>41315892
I'm a nigga and A-, I'm just goated

Unlike OP
Anonymous No.41319624
>>41318425
OP's a faggot as usual nothing new, but what about the rest of us

I'm A- negative, I'm going to find una bella vampira pelirroja, any advice?
Anonymous No.41319858 >>41319949
>>41313517 (OP)
Your head is misshapen. You will never be made a vampire.
Anonymous No.41319949
>>41319858
Looks like a pineapple
Anonymous No.41321646
Bump so vamp bro finds his sire
Anonymous No.41322329 >>41322575
You would get vampire diareaha but other than that you would get a lot of miscellaneous pussenstein..I assume that’s what you ultimately want.
Anonymous No.41322340
>>41315892
I'm RH positive, but I really want to see a vampire.
Anonymous No.41322575
>>41322329
I thought being a vampire was about blood and murder not pussy
Anonymous No.41323615
Your head is misshapen. You will never be made a vampire.
Anonymous No.41323693 >>41325283 >>41325290
>>41313668
don't vampires have superhuman strength? He'll look like he has no muscles but actually be super strong
Anonymous No.41323723 >>41325290
>>41313517 (OP)
If i got bit by a vampire that looks like you and not brad pitt i think id kill myself ngl
Anonymous No.41324570 >>41325294
Blade would eventually cut you in half.
Anonymous No.41325260
>>41316309
fr fr?
Anonymous No.41325267
>>41318425
Maybe I serve a vampire dumb dumb
Anonymous No.41325283 >>41325290
>>41323693
I'm obviously talking about body image and the pitfalls of being a slob for eternity. I mean, maybe vampires lift, so it doesn't mean he would have to stay that way... but fuck bro I don't know I have no idea about vampire biology.
Anonymous No.41325290
>>41323693
>>41325283
see this is what i'm talking about kek
>>41323723
Anonymous No.41325294
>>41324570
some mfs are always trying to ice skate uphill, primarly OP
Anonymous No.41325343
>>41313517 (OP)
You want this to be your life?
Anonymous No.41325414 >>41325494 >>41325522 >>41325762
>serious vampire thread: no replies
>weird looking guy asks dumb question: everyone replies

/x/ deserves this shit
Anonymous No.41325439
Anonymous No.41325490 >>41325517
This thread is cringe. You should go to a hypnotherapist to help you forget you ever made it.

>hurr i want to give up food and drink only metallic-tasting blood that contains harmful things so i can larp as a demon-infested retard on the internet

Yeah, leather trench coats are cool, I know. Don't forget to stand on top of buildings in lightning storms you fucking idiot.
Anonymous No.41325494
>>41325414
Bro you need to have fun and stuff.
Anonymous No.41325517
>>41325490
>Yeah, leather trench coats are cool, I know. Don't forget to stand on top of buildings in lightning storms you fucking idiot.
Fucking kek
I mean I guess they're cool in an ironic way, being genuinely cool was like a 2000s things, I think we slowly left it behind with The Matrix and, well, Columbine.
Anonymous No.41325522 >>41325528
>>41325414
>serious vampire thread

Let's face it, it's not been the same since a certain anon left. us
Anonymous No.41325528 >>41325580
>>41325522
Don't go there.
Anonymous No.41325580 >>41325731
>>41325528
lol why
Anonymous No.41325593 >>41325785
"How can you be outside in the day time?"

See, I can read your mind. That's the power of a vampire.

*teleports behind you*

The answer is, you have to leave your basement for short periods of time to accumulate resistance to the harsh UV rays of the sun.
Anonymous No.41325731
>>41325580
It's too dangerous.
Anonymous No.41325762
>>41325414
We basically overtook this thread because OP is a faggot and I'm out here asking the vamps where I can go meet Latina redhead vampiras

So my dick can get wet and sucked so hard that I become a vampire from how good the sex would be anon
Anonymous No.41325773 >>41325881
>>41314733
Redhead but not Latina, kill yourself
Anonymous No.41325785
>>41325593
This looks like OP a week after the vampire bite.
Anonymous No.41325881
>>41325773
you kill yourself fag it's literally in your post you wanted a latina
Anonymous No.41325925 >>41326149 >>41330108
>>41313517 (OP)
being a vampire means being undead which pretty much means being in a state that feels like sleep paralysis all the time.
Anonymous No.41326149
>>41325925
Grim
Anonymous No.41326754
bruh....
Anonymous No.41326784
>>41313517 (OP)
Bitch, id focus on putting down the cheeseburger first, if you can't say no to Ronald Mcdonald what makes you think you have the will power to contain your urge to feed when you need to.
Anonymous No.41327779
>>41313517 (OP)
The shilling is real ITT lol. You don't want this, fren. Trust me. It's not something epic and cool.
Anonymous No.41327918
>>41317127
Your physiognomy says otherwise
Anonymous No.41327987
baka kine tryna be us
Anonymous No.41328028
I get the feeling a lot of men are jealous of OP lmao you guys can't even grow hair
Anonymous No.41328117
I wonder if vampire pussy is good
Anonymous No.41329570
>>41313517 (OP)
OP is so much of a betafag that he scared off the vamps from this thread

Not even worth to be a blood slave
Anonymous No.41329603
>>41313956
Lol that's just meeeeaaan
Anonymous No.41329902
>>41313517 (OP)
You'd make a better dwarf.
Anonymous No.41330108
>>41325925
You've mentioned this before, but I suppose one can get used to anything. How did you come upon such an interesting take?
Anonymous No.41330511 >>41330599 >>41332614
>>41313517 (OP)
>Wants to be immortal
>Looks like this

Why though? Do you enjoy suffering or sum?
If I looked like this I would want my misery to end asap
Anonymous No.41330599 >>41332594 >>41333461
>>41330511
He can lose weight and shave and be normal looking desu
Anonymous No.41332594
>>41330599
lol
Anonymous No.41332614
>>41330511
Do you believe your appearance is all there is to life? How sad must you be.
Anonymous No.41333461 >>41333940
>>41330599
Bro being a vampire is something that I can only as barely tolerable with Lestat looks.
Also just common sense, being good looking means you can draw in anyone you want to feed from. Being an incel who can't fuck at will is going to make it really hard.
Anonymous No.41333940 >>41334060 >>41334094
>>41333461
Look, I have several friends who don't look for relationships because they think of themselves as too ugly. They literally pay random women for sex, not prostitutes, just normal ladies. You can just as easily do the same. It's not that hard... BTW, if you go to tinder men will fly on you, no matter what you look like.
Anonymous No.41334060 >>41334328
>>41333940
so you're a gay vampire?
Anonymous No.41334094 >>41334151
>>41333940
OP got no game, just look at how his replies in this thread have been so far
Anonymous No.41334151 >>41334557
>>41334094
Man I gotta stop shitting on OP this thread has been brutal but I can't look away lol
Anonymous No.41334328 >>41334345 >>41334557
>>41334060
Sure, not that I actually date men. Just have fun on apps.
BTW, black chicks in America are very easy.
Anonymous No.41334345
>>41334328
Yeah they kinda are.
Anonymous No.41334461 >>41334473 >>41334557
>>41313517 (OP)
You're not ugly at all! The only thing I'd suggest for you is that you might want to look into whether your hairline is receding. If it is, then you'll wanna hop on topical finasteride asap to prevent further recession. Balding basically destroys any chances at getting girls, so it's important for you to keep an eye out for that. Also, practising basic skincare never hurts [twice daily cleanser, occasional exfoilation, twice daily moisturizer, and daily sunscreen if you're going outside].

Aside from that, I think you look fine. Ignore the comments calling you ugly!
Anonymous No.41334473
>>41334461
would u date him though?
Anonymous No.41334557 >>41334812
>>41334151
OP looks too rapey to be a vampire unironically
>>41334328
you know where a nigga can meet a latina vampire then?
>>41334461
>only talks about physical looks, but doesn't say OP should stop being a betafag
>mfw niggas wont stop dicking on op
Anonymous No.41334812 >>41335208
>>41334557
>latina vampire
redundant
Anonymous No.41335208
>>41334812
Don't be such a faggot op at least I know what I want out of a vampire unlike yoh