Thread 33217608

And it's been 5 years already, here I am talking to another girl and I can help it but to think about my ex from all those years ago, I just can't get her out of my mind, it's as if she was truly the peak, the most valuable thing I ever had. Not a single girl I see is as beautiful as she was.
I want this to stop, what can I do? why am I still obsessed with her even when I know all the bad shit she did and does I can't believe I'm still in love with her even when I haven't even seen her in years

>>33217608 (OP)
Your ex is a person with warts and everything and you seriously need to move on. I was obsessed with an ex for a few years and then I moved on with my life. It's embarrassing to look back on.

>>33217608 (OP)
what makes her so special or stand out from the rest? sometimes it’s just self projection and that’s robbing you from being able to move on

>>33217608 (OP)
Gavin McInnes says fuck five fives

>>33217608 (OP)
realize she’s just another woman

>>33217608 (OP)
>it's as if she was truly the peak, the most valuable thing I ever had

what made her so valuable?

>>33217608 (OP)
>why am I still obsessed with her even when I know all the bad shit she did and does
You probably just don't believe that you can do better - or think you don't deserve to.

Also, ask yourself if it's really her you are hung up on, or merely the idea of her.

Get back with her. If you love her and she loves you, then you will make it work.

>>33217608 (OP)
The only question to ask is: Did you fix whatever the reason was for the breakup?

>>33217968
>Also, ask yourself if it's really her you are hung up on, or merely the idea of her.
Very important question to consider. I ran into an ex-gf by chance five years after we broke up, and over the course of a quick catch-up, it very quickly became clear that I had been mourning / pining for a ghost. She was simply a very different person to the one I remembered, or rather how I liked to remember her.

>>33219566
>he was simply a very different person to the one I remembered, or rather how I liked to remember her.
how was she different?

>>33219566
hate to burst The Bubble here but there’s also a real chance that this isn’t the case. because when i ran into my ex, she’d been doing really well and had genuinely improved/changed from when we originally dated. i expected myself to had been “mourning for a ghost” as you said but that wasn’t the case. we reconnected, and we are now married 6 years later

so OP’s going to have to find a different way to move on that doesn’t involve convincing himself that he’s not *really* hung up on her, or that she’s let herself go or something

>>33219474
I fixed what the issue was on my end. All I can do is be honest. We both made mistakes in the outside world played a large influence as well. I don't know what the solution is, but I know I want to try. How I see her like last time I saw her hasn't changed for me.

no. you supposedly haven't spoken to her in that regard in 5 years, so you don't know how your relationship would be in the present day. what you're obsessed with is the idea of her and whatever experiences you're dwelling on; just find a way to stop and move on if she already has and stop giving her power in your life when she's not there how you want her to be

remembering doesn't change that

Not forgetting is what makes the difference. Because I felt the same the entire time I know it's real. Whatever you say, it doesn't matter. It's empty words compared to what I know to be true. You can be butt hurt and act like a fag about it but it doesn't change the fact it's true.

>>33217608 (OP)
Find her pornstar lookalike.

>>33222098
> I want this to stop, what can I do?
> Whatever you say, it doesn't matter

it doesn't seem like you want any suggestions then. what you felt was real, yes, but if you feel it's negatively affecting you NOW and your ability to potentially get better relationships, it's just something that feels nice but is holding you back

You will never understand. And I don't need you to, all that matters is that I know it's true.

You can try to sabotage all you want, it won't make a difference

least obvious ragebait

>>33217608 (OP)
try to visualize your feelings as something like a scrapbook. an object to be put on on a shelf. it might be sentimental, lots of people keep scrapbooks and love scrapbooking but how often do they actually go through it? many years pass as they get covered in dust and they fade out of sight and mind.

try visualizing her like this. i had one ex before my current gf, it took a while, but, i got over her.

>>33219645
Sounds like she was very different, just in ways you like. People rarely stay the same for very long, and when they do it's often not for good reasons IME

>>33217608 (OP)
>I'm still in love with her
NO ANON
YOUR DICK IS IN LOVE WITH HER
STOP THINKING WITH YOUR DICK
THINK WITH YOUR BRAIN
RETARD

Bemoralization campaign going strong.
If someone stays the same it shows consistency and commitment. Faithfulness over all else. This shows that it is the truth.

If it was just lust then I would have been gone a long time ago