>What is /htgwg/?
How to Get Women General is by men, for men, about women, so bring all of your questions about getting and dealing with women here. Some anons on this site actually get laid, and some of those even want to help. If you're trying to meet and date women, then this is the place to ask questions, seek advice, and share experiences. We know how hard it can be. We got you bro.

>What is /htgwg/ not?
These threads are NOT for whining, moping, incels, volcels, MGTOW, hopelessness, or demoralization. We're all aware that meeting and dating women is hard today, and even harder for some, but /htgwg/ is for men trying to overcome the challenges. IGNORE the posters who complain, have given up, or insist that there's nothing they can do. This site has other boards and threads that they can pollute. BE SMART: Spot the bait, don't reply, and DON'T WASTE TIME ARGUING WITH THEM!

>How to ask for advice
Context is important: be more specific than "This girl ghosted me, why?" We can't help if we don't know the situation, so try to provide as much (useful) info as possible ("I was at the bar, this chick was checking me out..."). What's your relationship with the girl? How long have you known her? Any conversation screenshots? Etc... Don't forget to ask an actual question.

>Resources and Books
Wingman.live: https://wingman.live/ (AI dating coach)
"Models": https://pdfcoffee.com/318797392-mark-manson-models-2016pdf-4-pdf-free.html
"No More Mr Niceguy": https://archive.org/details/robert-glover-no-more-mr-nice-guy-id-353324692-size-612
Wingmam: https://www.youtube.com/@YourWingmam
Dr. NerdLove: https://www.doctornerdlove.com/blog/
Leykis 101: https://pastebin.com/7U5Sdhwq
https://fantasticanachronism.com/2025/03/20/how-to-be-good-at-dating/
(new suggestions with working links are welcome)

REMEMBER: It's good to read and prepare, but don't overdo it. Get off this site: go learn and build up your social skills by meeting actual women in the real world.

Prev: >>33259172

Why did the general die?

>>33263909
Probably poor choice of OP pic in the last one

>>33263909
Why's it so dead then? Did we all get gfs?

I'm average asf and get laid. as it happens I have a date with a nice milf tomorrow.
my secret: I get drunk and I try.

last date was landed saturday night when I was leaving a bar in the following manner
>hi, you're very pretty
>hi, thanks
>I'm looking for a girlfriend, wanna go for drinks on tuesday or wednesday?
>tuesday is OK, here's my #
it was the 5th or 6th woman I tried this on that night

How does one hook up with Indian chicks? I'm a leaf and they're everywhere in public but idk if they go to bars or use tinder or what. Is there a place/app I should prioritize looking to up my odds?

>>33264362
This is nothing to brag about
>I'm a youngish guy who has sex with old women (easy) and get myself drunk to do it because I'm searing my conscience by being a degenerate

How do dudes who look like this manage to get gfs?

M or F

I'm geuinely autistic hear me out. How do you go about navigating casual hook ups or whatever? I turned down a girl I thought was really stunning because I'm currently seeing someone in my free time. It's basically just casual at the minute and we've not really discussed taking it further than just sex or whatever. I don't know if you're supposed to hit them with the "what are we" talk or read between the lines. I want to date around to understand better who I'd like to be with and already feel a bit sad I turned down the other girl.

>>33263842 (OP)
>how to get women
All the good looking women who would make great wives and mothers are taken in high school and college the latest. Whatever remains is taken shortly after they enter the workforce. There exist very few good looking (7 and above) women that are single and have a good heart, are modest, raised in a decent family, soft spoken and pretty. The window of opportunity when they are single is very very narrow. These are the 2% of women, the highest stock of females this wonderful creation can offer. If you don't frequent their circles or the events they attend you have no chance of meeting them. Women also don't go anywhere alone, so whatever hobbies women have or events they attend it is done with their husband or boyfriend and if they are single with their groups of friends.

tldr; there simply aren't enough single good looking young white women to go around for everybody, they are rare and exist mostly in very niche places where men without social circles (loners) can't get in to

I hit it off with this cute girl I met on hinge, talked to her for three days, we had a date planned, talked about our deal breakers and future plans and things seemed great. However, last night she started talking about tattoos and she said she planned to get "many". I asked how many and she said more than two cause I said one or two I'm fine with. So I told her it was a deal breaker and broke it off. She was super sweet and understanding about it. However now I'm a bit upset about it, not regretful but I just think it's a shame because it was a great connection. However tattoos on women are disgusting and I stand by that.

>>33264526
wrong thread nigger

I was talking to a girl from bumble for a few days and her profile said long term relationship so I asked her later on insta if she was actually looking for a serious relationship and she blocked me lmao, why are some people like this? What a bitch.

I'm getting drinks with a girl in 2 weeks I already told her that's my last week in town but she was still down. How to turn the implications into reality during the date?
Also how much texting should be done and what about to keep interest up?

Is it possible to recover from asking a girl for a kiss? She said yes but I just feel like even when you’re unsure whether she wants it or not that it’s an unbelievably retarded way to do it and I’m wishing I said anything but that desu

>>33266559
no never ask to kiss that's retarded. maybe a gay guy, because it's feminine and passive and might speak to them

>>33266562
Yes I’m aware it’s retarded m8, I let my autism get the best of me. What I’m asking is if it’s possible to recover from it?

>>33264523
Being normal and a head taller than a woman is enough.

>"Why are you always so shy and serious, anon? You should smile more!!"
Why is she saying things like this

I'm in a dumb situation. I feel stupid for having her in my mind but hey that's just how I roll.

Met a girl at a festival, we spent 3 days together. Not constantly but we would run into each other and dance/talk/dance/talk. The last night of the festival we got into really deep emotional talks and we hugged like crazy and we definitely "sparked". We exchanged numbers and said we would keep in touch. Problem is, she lives in another country (and is a bit younger than me (nothing extreme). I don't want her as my girlfriend because obviously that would be such a pain but I do want to keep in touch and be in her life a bit.

When is a good time to start texting her? Straight away has always been the universal "no" but I don't want her to forget about me so fast. Do I even jump back into the emotional shit or go casual first? She even admitted to me that she has abandonment issues (same here I guess) and part of me feels like I can "use" that to keep her interested in me. God I feel so childlike with this, it's been so long since I felt like this for a girl.

coming full circle to this

>>33266764
Well probably because you're always shy and serious, and need to smile more. Just a thought.

>Finally had the courage to ask a girl out on coffee/dinner/walk
>She said yes
Now the self-doubt begins:
Did she understood it as I was asking for a date?
What if she thought I asked as just a friend?
What do i even do now? She said she is busy this week, so we do it next week.
Do I text her between now and then?
How do I do any of this stuff?

>>33268506
>Did she understood it as I was asking for a date?
>What if she thought I asked as just a friend?
Of course she knows you want to fuck.
>What do i even do now? She said she is busy this week, so we do it next week.
>Do I text her between now and then?
Try to be normal. Sure it's hard.. but that's life.
You should... mirror her level of interest.
>How do I do any of this stuff?
Say good morning, how are you doing, tell her things about your job or shit, after dinner, etc.
Be cool and basically, never "double text".
If she is interested, all will go smooth.

Two weeks it's a lot of time and texting could lead to misunderstanding.
Real confident men just call.
So if she is "normal" you can call each nigh every 1-3 days.
If she is interested in you, she will call you.

>>33264523
open relationships

>>33264362
Fucking kek. Might try this.
>>33264506
No no, this is great.

Stop trying to impress people, just for the sake of them being good. Instead, impress people who care and understand.

>>33270176
Why would they want to care and understand you if you don't impress them or stand out?

>>33270189
It's a bit different anon. Some people look past mistakes seeing you as human, and others well they're a bit too perfectionist. There are people in this world who need that perfection to be capable of doing good deeds, but however, you're a baffling idiot to them, and they can't help but feel humiliated by you all the time, maybe instead of going to someone who has all of the good traits you want, you go to someone who doesn't let your antics get to them, but instead laughs it off and moves on.

>>33263842 (OP)
>match with a girl
>fake name, semi obscure photos
>says she's a psychotherapist, claims to be avoiding her patients
Well alrighty then, seems excessive though

>>33266550
>How to turn the implications into reality during the date?
Ask her back to your place, if you have one, or insinuate yourself into her place. Any excuse will do as long as she's interested: "hey, wanna grab a cup of tea?"
>Also how much texting should be done and what about to keep interest up?
That's why I like setting up dates fairly quickly. It all depends on how often you've texted up to this point. But I say a few message every 2-3 days should do the job.

>>33263909
>Why did the general die?
>>33264289
>Why's it so dead then? Did we all get gfs?
You know why, don’t play dumb

Try to remain optimistic despite a woman's sterness. Being patient is best. This does not mean be a doormat, but try to be positive and her despite the sternness.

>>33273271
Be positive about yourself and her*

Genuinely, I can't connect with women, I can't respect them, I'm not gonna betabux but I'm not good-looking enough for casual sex, which is the only thing I really want these days.

IDK maybe I'll just try and lower my test levels or something.

>>33273271
It's hard to remain optimistic when it feels like you just lack what it takes to actually make people love you.

>>33266943
>she lives in another country
Forget it. Imagine having to fly over to her for the first date - all that time, effort and money for high pressure.

>>33273491
Why do you feel you can't connect or respect them?

>>33274303
Many, many reasons, but the short version is that their lives are simply too God damn easy these days, in at least one aspect or another. Almost all misery a woman experiences is purely something that was her choice. As someone who's been feeding themselves since the age of 4 due to neglect and managed to succeed despite it, I can't help but feel... apathy with a tinge of disgust about them.

>>33274344
I can understand the feeling. But if you want casual sex you need to at least engage with women. And if you want to engage with them, you should try not to judge them beforehand. I'm sure it's something you've already heard a lot of times, but that's just how it is.

>work up the balls to go up to 6/10 at walmart
>she gets really awkward and after a few forced exchanges asks me to please leave her alone
>just leave all my shit on the shelf and gtfo

you faggots told me cold approaching was the best way to meet women nowadays. fucking liars.
also I don't think I can go back to that store and it was the closest one to my apartment, fuck all of you now I have to drive an extra 10 minutes every time I want food.

Hey, what do I do if she wants to be a house waif? I'm successful enough for this, but this is something I've not thought about.

I have no idea what to do. I went on a couple dates with a coworker and prior to the 3rd one she told me she’s not ready for a relationship right now.
I think there was more to it than just that but I’m inclined to think that was the truth as she seems like she also has mental stuff going on.
Thing is, it’s been over a month and she still sneaks looks at me, smiles at me, makes eye contact with me a lot and also initiates convos often. Now keep in mind, she is a shy and introverted woman. She does not treat other coworkers the same way she treats me. I want her, but I also want to respect her decision and I don’t want to pressure her. Problem is, despite the ball being in her court, I don’t think she will bring it up again (for multiple reasons), even if she does have feelings for me. Another problem is that even though it really does seem like she has feelings for me, it also seems like she doesn’t like me as much as I like her. I don’t know if she’s trying to stop herself, which is exactly what I’ve been doing too (trying to not get too attached and respect her choice) or if she doesn’t like me as much as I think. I’ll continue to enjoy her company at work, but all of this has me thinking; if she was really that into me, there wouldn’t be all this second guessing, yeah? Or are weird(for lack of a better word), introverted women just naturally this confusing?

>>33277982
>*at times it also seems like she doesn’t like me as much as I like her

>>33277982
The mistake you're making here is assuming that just because a woman smiles at you, flirts with you, or yes, even has feelings for you to at least some extent means she also wants to be in a relationship with you.
And you are correct, a woman who truly wants to be with you wouldn't make it this complicated or hard for you, so you just answered your own question I think. Trust your gut. It might not even be a good idea to be in a relationship with this girl even if she was willing. You said yourself she has some mental issues going on. People will tell you who they really are without you (or even them) realizing it.

I've always been way more attracted to black women as a white guy, I even lost my virginity to one. But now I'm living somewhere that I feel like I'm not attracting them, not matching on dating apps, etc. How can I find a black queen once again?

How do I reply to pic related? Any way to salvage it? I dont know how to strike the balance between overly horny and sterile. She's probably DTF but idk how to bring it home. I've had a gf before and we had sex but I think I was basically just betabux.

>>33278836
Lol

>2 emojis
>you free for drinks Saturday evening?

>>33278836
You don't, she sounds boring and dry as fuck

Also why did you say you'd rather show it in person? Sounds like you're talking about flashing her lol

Going to ask her to be my gf tonight wish me luck
BTW none of the advice I've heard here has helped at all lmao

>>33278201
I'd say if you're a white guy who can't fuck black girls you're ugly as fuck or look like a shooter

Question for men. What are your secret tricks that help you to find girls with daddy issues and/or BPD? I love this type so much.

>>33279067
What two emojis should I send?

>>33279092
Yeah she probably is but all I care about is creaming in her pussy.
>why did you say
Because I wanted to indicate attraction instead of making small talk about her job. These women are mostly boring as hell, probably cause they're not that attracted to me, so I just go for the closest slightly sexual flirting I can. The only times I got hookups in my life the girl was pretty receptive to sex talk almost right away.

>>33279339
>What two emojis should I send?

Eggplant, then either fire or peach. Never goes wrong.

No dont send the eggplant into peach hahahah
I was thinking either the skull or a laughing one like the wink + tongue one.

>hahahah
Get back to plebbit, faggot.

>>33279393
You've already told her that you'd like to show her your dick in person my nigga, if she doesn't respond to eggplant and peach she's messing with you.

>>33279393
I thought emojis were gay?

The main thing with dates is to try to have a good time.

>>33277982
give it up bro
she clearly rejected you

knowing when to quit is highly attractive
if you don't give up when there's clear rejection like that, she'll just grow to hate you

>>33279121
I'm nerdy looking and only fat white girls seem into that

>>33278045
I just wonder if she’s acting this way because she’s trying to not go back on her decision despite having feelings for me, as well as other reasons. But I digress, what is abundantly clear is that she’s made her decision. I think pulling back but still enjoying her company and not acting butthurt is the best thing I can do. Because as it stands although I’m willing to wait for her, this shit is really confusing and complicated

>>33263842 (OP)
Hey guys,

Last year a girl that I really liked left me. It sucked but I'm pretty sure Im over it. I've been roaming around ever since. I got in way better shape and have been getting more matches on my app. I try to go into every date with an open mind but I just dont really feel a spark, or even find them attractive. These girls arent ugly but I just dont feel attracted to them like the last one.

Right now I have a girl who seems pretty into me, shes alright, we have a few common interests. I wish I was madly in love with this woman, but I'm not. I think I'll keep things casual and hope it turns around and I do fall for her. Have any of you guys experienced this type of shit before?

Coworkers say I need to "put myself out there". How? Where?

>>33280344
Now.

>>33264362
You make it sound so easy.

>>33280490
very helpful anon

>>33280779
Less thinking more doing.

Giving women mutual respect is a lot better than being nice.

>>33280171
I think people have "types" and they can realistically love 99% of people in the right condition, but they only feel sparks for their "types". Your "types" can evolve as you get exposed to more types of people in theory and also you can meet girls that are similar "types" to girls you met in the past.

>>33280344
Zach is actually kinda right, but working on yourself is a great way to push that off and increase your odds later on. Realistically there is probably 500,000+ women in America that are you dream girl that would date you now and you just have to get out however you can and network.

How come when I try to follow this dumbass thread's advice to not be cringe and autistic, I get no action for months.
But when I decide to just do whatever the fuck I want it works 2nd night?
I honestly did just tell the girl I find her body attractive and I wanna see if her personality's hot too. Then I honestly just told her what I was looking for (hookups). It worked.

>>33281171
Because you're an 8+/10 which means you need almost no game at all and "overgaming" is a thing.

>>33281158
>Your "types" can evolve
What? TYPES is evolving!
Congratulations! Your TYPES evolved into OYAKODON!

>>33281181
Like 10-20% of women are open to having sex with most guys that show interest. They can be really hot too. It's not in my personality to sleep with them though because I don't like hookups it turns out. They can be down to date too. They're just kinda "easy" for lack of a better word.

I was thinking of trying online dating or just dating without someone setting me up with a woman. Normally, when meeting and talking with people before pursuing a date, I could advertise my most desirable traits first and after there's some level of commitment reveal my less desirable ones. I'm assuming people looking for a date right out of the gate though are going to poke around more before they develop any attraction to me, so I was going to ask how much of my flaws are a turnoff to try and decide what to work on first:

Flaws
>Getting older (36)
>Short at 5'7"
>Not very outgoing
>Lack of sociable hobbies
>Pretty much a nerd, talk way too much about niche subjects no one cares about
>Recently moved back in with parents since mom's not in great health
>Job is stable but pays poorly

On the upside
>Told I am very handsome and even hot by quite a few women
>Not overweight, exercise regularly
>Have a college education
>Financially stable, have about $120k in savings and a little more in investments
>No major personality flaws or overt quirks
>Active volunteer for local charity/church organization

What should I try to change or improve in order to not raise a red flag for women I date? And outside of my own issues, what are some general things that immediately drive away potential long term partners?

>>33281706
Don't put your height in your profile. I didn't and I plently had dates and hookups, but if I was upfront about height, I'd get filtered right away

Living with your parents at 36 is the real problem here, even if you have good reasons for it.

>>33264378
I want a brown chick eh... Me I could have talked to some of them in indian stores in Paris, there maybe I should have asked about the products, the saree, and said "I want to buy it to my future wife even if she would happen to be white". So that's an idea. Some of them looked at me but I didn't discern what their looks meant, it could be curiosity in a non-secure way (maybe because we are in Paris and there are muslim idk eh)

>>33281814
I figured that'd be an issue but I think I'm stuck here for a bit until the situation improves, probably at least half a year or so. I had a rent house from 30 to 34 but came back after my mother went through cancer treatment, she's better now but still has treatments I'm taking her to. I could move out but then I'd have to drive a lot more to take her to them.

Should I try and hide that fact while attempting to date? I think any dates will figure it out quickly when I can't take them back home, but it might also be that I could try and outweigh the problem some other way.

>>33281827
Just tell them the truth, not much else you can do. Don't put it in your profile though

>>33263842 (OP)
where can I meet lots of women ? When will the women start looking at me in the streets ?

Anyone else avoid women who owns dogs? There's a good likelihood they are fucking them.

>>33281934
Maybe you should entertain an idea of touching grass

>>33281934
Fuck her dog, reclaim the alpha position.

>>33281934
Dogs are fucking disgusting regardless. Whenever I see a dog I want to kill it with a baseball bat.

>>33281934
Pets are desire killers for me

They force woman into schedule, waking up early. Dog is always around, with unnecessary complications. If you bond with dog, you will have more to grief during separation later. Dog will be in your bed. Dates can be complicated because she has to feed/walk it

Pets are like light version of babies. Unromantic and bothersome. Oh she will expect you to handle this dog as your own. But you never chose it or trained it

>>33281706
You have low self esteem, you inner world belief is how to appease women (not to raise red flags) instead of how to market yourself to them

And you are 36. You are a peter pan living with parents, cloistered and neurotic. It will feel weird, but open your mind and heart for a moment

You as you are - personality, lifestyle and dating skills - are lagging 10 years behind

When girls flirt with me I either don't notice until after the fact or I just freeze up, not knowing what to do and it hurts so fucking much. Also just meeting cool people in general makes me super anxious because I feel like I'm constantly gonna bother everyone, nothing to do with wanting to get with girls or anything.
But in other news I fairly recently got my first kiss, it happened outside a rave venue. It was nice but felt confusing afterwards...

>>33282547
>And you are 36. You are a peter pan living with parents, cloistered and neurotic
That’s harsh and unfair. Moving in with his mother bc of her health is different than doing it bc you have no money. He’s got 120k in savings, so he doesn’t have to live with her.

Anyway, I agree trying to minimize red flags is the wrong attitude. Should be trying to build himself up. And making more money is probably the most important aspect of that. The rest of it, is not as much of a weakness as you might think. Especially on online dating if you’re hot.

>>33282628
>That’s harsh and unfair. Moving in with his mother bc of her health is different than doing it bc you have no money. He’s got 120k in savings, so he doesn’t have to live with her.
NTA and I agree, but come on, woman don't look at it the same way

>>33282628

Son, I will be brutal, but loving

>That’s harsh and unfair
Life was never designed to be fair. Universe is harsh and doesnt care about how you feel. Either you live in delusion and fail or you accept the reality and adapt

>Moving in with his mother bc of her health is different than doing it bc you have no money
You are clueless. Female attraction is not excell spreadsheet. Woman looks at grown up man, who LIVES WITH his mother, instead of being the king sponsoring his mother care and lifestyle. And female biology screams - this mommy boy is stagnating since he is 16

And she cannot help it, evolutionary biology doesnt care about your morality, or priests would have more bitches than rock stars

>He’s got 120k in savings
Male brain. Clueless. Female desire is based on empathy, mirror neurons, pattern recognition and such. Number in his phone will never outweight reality in front of the woman - this boy never left his mothers lap

You are arguing out of logic, common sense and virtues. I am opening your eyes to attraction, desire and emotions. They are opposite

>Should be trying to build himself up
Okay, not fully clueless. These are words of a man, not a child. Very good

>The rest of it, is not as much of a weakness as you might think
Women can sense weakness out of one word saying with certain tonality. I am not inviting everyone into micromanaging every small bit, I am bringing awareness. Women care only how you make them feel, and very attentive to that

>Especially on online dating if you’re hot
I will say it with brutal love, but to female he is a deadend short manchild being a part time nurse to a grandma. He is competing with men 10 years younger with same money, better genetics and no mothers to babysit. His biggest advantage over competition should be developed seduction skills, emotional regulation, sexual polarity, lifestyle stability and tribal/social connections

He is antisocial, asking how to impress women

>>33282135
I'm surprised by the amount of porn there is of women fucking their pooches. Now factor in all the women who do it secretly.

>>33282547
>>33282628
It makes a lot of sense though when anon phrases it like that--I'm not playing to win right now, I'm playing not to lose. Won't get as far with that attitude.

I had always approached the dating scene as being similar between a man and a woman even though it's not. I as a man look for major flaws in a partner and exclude them based on that first because there's a few hard requirements I look for in the women I date. A woman might be more interested in the other end of the spectrum, what can the man do for her, and the other aspects are negotiable so long as he can provide and satisfy.

>>33282667
This is the harsh truth, I'm afraid. Even with a good reason, no one wants to date a middle aged man who lives with his parents, even if it's more his parents living with him. If I were a woman looking to settle down with a man, I would not want the inlaws living under the same roof.

>>33276223
Dude who fucking cares. Don't base your happiness on whether or not a woman approved of you.

>>33277982
She just wants you to orbit. Move on. If she sees that you're over her she'll probably say something like, "you've been so cold to me lately what's going on?" She already said no, don't let her waste your time.

>>33280093
You're not getting what anons are telling you MOVE ON. Or forever be trapped in the friend zone. While you're patiently waiting for her she's probably already with someone else. This is textbook friendzone shit.

>>33264378
Be white and go on Tinder. Also a Leaf in college and I've had Indian girls in my class practically interrogate me. Don't know why you'd want one though.

Do you really need to use dating apps these days? I don't want to just find some random slut at a bar either.

Do women want sex on the first date? I am in a horrible catch 22 because I have bad sexual anxiety and really need to get to know a woman before I can trust her enough to have sex but it seems that most women want sex pretty much immediately and if you don't give it to them they get it from somewhere else.

>>33279146
On dating apps set your sexuality to bisexual and then for filters select "show only women"

>>33281706
You sound way too self conscious for someone that financially stable. 5'7" is not that bad.

>>33281847
I started getting mires in public once I hit sub 20% body fat.

>>33283550
On my first ever date with a girl I feel like I could have fucked on the first date because she ask me if we're going back to my place on the walk home, I gave sort of an open ended answer instead of saying "yes" so it didn't happen. We fucked on the 2nd though. I feel like most girls will fuck on the first date if the vibe is right (though won't admit it for fear of being labeled a slut), you just have to lead her to it.

>>33280171
You are not over the last girl. Hope this helps.

>>33282519
Brown detected.

>>33283535
No just wait in your room if you wait long enough your soulmate will come knock on your door and you get married that day.

>>33283611
You joke but a repair girl came over one day and was totally into me. Of course I did nothing about it because I'm a retard.

So, how much rejects I should be prepared to before meeting gf?

Has anyone here actually gone from being a virgin hermit to having a gf? I mean like in your mid twenties and onward?

>>33283683
I was a virgin and didn't get my first gf until 25. Took a lot of looksmaxing and self-reflection and getting my first gf kinda affirmed and I am good enough for people and that the self-doubt is all in my head.

Is using chatgpt a good idea to navigate this new-to-me dating stuff?
I'm 34 and this is my first time ever trying to get a gf
The autism is a bit strong in me and I have no idea how any of this works. It's like learning chinese or something

>>33283731
No, talking to some pozzed AI will just condition you to be a betamale. Maybe consider getting a job where you interact with the public often, it can give you charisma gainz.

>>33283741
Been in sales for 15 years now. Having that job does not make me better at talking to girls. At work I only talk work stuff, not flirting and shit.

>>33281322
>Like 10-20% of women are open to having sex with most guys that show interest
Not me though

>>33283731
I give chatgpt the conversations and ask for a reply but it's always super ass. It's kind of decent for finding date places or whatever.
My best advice is to just go on dates and level up through experience. Yeah you'll blow it at the start rhey will think you're awkward and ghost you after but just use every encounter as a learning experience. Cheap coffee dates during the weekends and have conversations learn to interact with women.

>>33283620
Or maybe she thought she might squeeze a tip from you

>>33263842 (OP)
For some reason all my hookups were with women who had "looking for new friends" or "still figuring it out" tag on Tinder.

Try to fuck a girl who attends the same meetup group I do (so our social circle is similar). Yay or nay?
I have no intentions in having a long-term relationships with her.

>>33281934
If she's White, 200%
If she's Asian, that's your breakfast tomorrow.

>>33283586
>nooooooooooo not the pupperinos!!!!!

>>33283519
you misunderstood my last sentence

>>33283925
>Or maybe she thought she might squeeze a tip from you
She wanted to squeeze a tip, alright.

>>33282626
Literally me. Women have flirted with me since i was 12, but i always act like a total autist afterwards so nothing comes of it. I'm not sure how chads come up with responses so quickly.

>>33282626>
Literally me. Women have flirted with me since i was 12, but i always act like a total autist afterwards so nothing comes of it. I'm not sure how chads come up with responses so quickly.

How unreasonable can a woman's requests for communication regularity get before she's a lost cause?
I'm honestly so used to being left on read by women that women requesting daily "updates" or similar response times is alien to me.

Two different stunners sat next to me at the library after eyeing when me walking in, aaaaaand... I did nothing with it. Sigh. My looks will someday fade, been used for very little, and I'll be left wondering why I didn't do more with it when I had the opportunity. But what can I even do in that situation? "Hey, what you workin' on?" meh

>>33284647
My thoughts are if she understands that you might be busy within reason (IE, she knows you're at work five nights a week and can't reply on the spot, or understands that you might not be at your phone every minute of your days off) and doesn't hold that against you, it's fine. If she's expecting an hour or two conversation every day, you need to either rein her in or just meet in person/live together.

I've had a couple of girlfriends with boundary issues like that, and while I can't say I wasn't ever guilty of just putting her off because I wanted to do something else, sometimes I just wanted to go to sleep or talk to friends elsewhere. If I were sitting around and watching TV or whatever though I was usually quick to respond.

>>33263842 (OP)
The truth about women is this:
You need to kill your ego and stop giving a fuck about them, what they want, think, or how they perceive you. Don’t care about getting women or being seen by them in any particular way.

Once you truly understand this, your so-called “game” will start working, because there is no game. There’s a woman, and there’s a man. If there’s mutual attraction, it’s a win.

Just be yourself. It’s old advice, but it works.

If you still want to understand a thing or two: women are generally attracted to security, stability, masculine energy directed toward the world, and protective energy directed toward them. It’s like a mix of strength and care. Ultimately, women are deeply driven by emotion, work on it.

But here’s my final advice: Don’t give a fuck. Don’t try to overanalyze or decode anything. Just live. Ignorance truly is bliss, believe me.

POV: Bankrupt, living with my parents, mildly depressed, no car, working 14 hours a day, strangely enough, I’m not invisible to women.
Do I understand it? No.
Do I want to? Also no.

>>33284680
My problem is I currently have nothing worthwhile to say to anyone.

Okay, how's this for the cold approach:
>Hey, how's it going?
>Hey. I'm good, you?
>Good. I just moved here and don't really know anyone yet, can I get your number?

>>33283585
While theres a lot of thought about this topic, you might be right. My inclination is to keep going with the one I'm seeing right now in an effort to actually get over her.

>>33284680
I'm currently dating women to get better at dating women. There's only one of the bunch I would consider marrying, and none I would fuck off the bat.
Maybe it's just my Machiavellian tendencies, but I can't see dating as anything other than a means to marry, and marrying as anything other than a means to give my children the best possible chances to succeed. Going out with women is nothing other than practicing so that when I finally find a woman worth investing in, she's willing to invest back.
I go different places when dating just so I have the experience, almost never because I care about the woman, because I know they almost never care about me. For me, this is just Advanced Masking 401, and passing lets me graduate to parenthood.

How can I stop being so desperate
I want girls and I want them to show up to dates
But I’ve noticed if I don’t try hard most will just ignore me
But trying hard then conversely makes them less attracted to me and thus get no real results even if they show up to the date

>>33276223
What did you say? How did it go?

>>33285116
You have to give up in order to get good
If you spend all your time worrying about how you'll never be the best you can do nothing but fuck up. Let go of your ego and you will ironically become confident, because it's not about what other people think of you, it's what happens or doesn't happen. Did you get closer to your goal? That's what matters.

>>33263842 (OP)
How do I meet women in my 30s?
>30 khhv
>only been on one date (met on an app. Went well, but desu she was too autistic for me)
>allegedly decent looking, 6'1" tall, not obese
>male-dominated nerd hobbies
>don't know how to chat up strangers, especially when it comes to rizz
>mostly stay home when not doing hobbies with friends because bars are boring and there's not much else to do around me
>shitty job where I'm explicitly not supposed to even become friends with coworkers
>tfw still living with parents
Is there any hope?

>>33285639
Of course there is. My brother is an introvert and didn't find his introvert gf until he was in his early 30s.

>>33285660
How did he manage that?

>>33285687
They met through work.

>>33285697
>tfw seemingly stuck in my shitty dead end job
Oh

>>33285711
Stop feeling sorry for yourself.
Most of us are alone because we have a bad attitude about life.

>>33285732
I suppose I am a bit of cynic when it comes to my perspective on life. Might be a bit too late to do anything about that

>3rd date
>saw signs that she wanted to be kissed
>played with her hair
>sat close to me
>deep stares
>kiss that turned heavy petting in the car
>suggested going to my place
>she said if you want, yes
>heavy make out in bed
>half naked
>didn't finish the job as she was on her period
maybe next time

>>33284761
Cold approach is not a thing in Tinder era, certainly not that kind of goofy routine as you've posted

Sitting on the train, this ebony queen gets on wearing a silky dress, titty cleavage, ass for dayzzzz. She sits opposite me, says hello, smiling, asks where I’m going and what I’m up to. I just fucking buckled. I’m not used to sexy women striking up conversation with me. I also had to get off at the next stop :( Was she interested?

>>33286163
You are Jewish.

>>33286166
You are schizo

>>33263842 (OP)
Where can I make lots of female friends ? I love friendship with females and I maybe we can start becoming romantic with one of them.

>>33286286
Become or LARP as a gay faggot
Start wearing makeup, right hotpants, paint your nails, get yourself a cute little gucci purse
Problem solved

>>33286293
CWC already proved that the "gal pal" approach doesn't work.

>>33286322
Tell her you have a crush on Tom Cruise

>>33286293
that would kill all my social life, betray my principles, it would not feel right and I want long term witha good woman, not a leftist.

>>33286405
Women don't befriend heterosexual men, less they have tomboyish tendencies (they won't date you, less you look like the male version of a battle lesbian).

>>33286417
I do have female friends, though one indeed thinks I'm gay or have suspicion (maybe because I didn't try anything with her and was just o joyful somethimes and not serious enough), she was the gf of my good guy friend. And also I have been friend with the gf (woon wife) of my brother, friend with lots of women too, we just don't talk both alone too long, yet we talk, exchangenews, are friendly. So yes I can have lots of female friends. Also I am very into religion so I can be seen as neutral more maybe

>>33286452
Talking to females isn't a friendship. Especially if she has a boyfriend.

>>33286542
Whatever it is how you define friendship, I like having women around and talking to them, and and meeting them so that at some point I'm better at relationships with women and getting the right woman.

>>33286557
Whatever feeds into your delusional hopes of becoming a casanova of some sort.

>>33285427
if my goal is to get a wife, or a gf I can be proud of, then improving is probably my most important goal
but, I don't see it happening
it really seems like luck, because changing fundamentally how you think, how people perceive you takes years

it's pretty depressing and frustrating

>>33286637
additionally one of my realizations after 30 years of life, is that there is no such thing as success
I am in a doomer moment

but all life is, is failure.
just a bunch of failures
the only guarantee in life is failure
success is never guaranteed

>>33286637
>>33286640
Hit the gym.
Get a good job.
Have a real personality.
It's that easy.

>>33263842 (OP)
>new suggestions with working links are welcome)
The Rational Male is pretty dated but still applicable. Chateau Heartiste too.

>>33284689
>>33285116
You need to start getting genuinely well-read.
Not just nerdcore bullshit about not jerking off and the construction of siege weapons but a genuinely broad range of things from autobiographies to travel accounts to horror to economics to poetry.
You have to find ways to become interesting and balanced and extensive reading is the fastest way of doing that if you don't just focus on the usual suspects/subjects.
Stupid men get women all the time because they're socially well versed but you don't have a time machine to redo the critical first 12 years of your life so instead you have to lean into your strengths and fill your brain with a host of different things to augment your personality and discourse with.
The fastest way of generating a good reading list is looking up authors that are popular with women then reading what said authors said they read.
Even tepid romance writers usually have one or two books that you'll find genuinely interesting.
Then fill out the rest.

>>33286069
So, what, when I make lingering and repeated eye contact with a very attractive girl out in public, maybe even with a smile, it's just hopeless? There's nothing I can do? I refuse to believe it. Surely someone here has good advice for it.

>>33287175
If you make eye contact with a woman, she has already decided everything about you in those few seconds. Wether you approach or not is irrelevant, it's all out of your hands.

>>33287175
You have to put in more effort, do some small talk to establish that you're not a creep or idiot

How do I cold approach women who give me signals? I've looksmaxxed a good amount and every so often a cute girl will place themselves close to me, keep looking at me, etc. I feel good that more women find me attractive, but I actually don't know how to start a conversation with them. We just spend time in the same place for like 15 minutes before one of us leaves and we never see each other again.

How do I stop being nervous before first dates?
I've been on around 40 first dates in the past 2 years and
every single time
I'll be shitting 4-5 times on the day of the date. I'm literally shitting myself I'm so scared.
When I meet the girls it's fine, I can hold a conversation and make them laugh and all that but the entire day of the date is a fucking nightmare. I've tried alcohol and it helps somewhat but it makes me equally useless for any productive work that day. I wouldn't know where to buy weed, it's illegal here and I don't know any dealers or anyone who knows any dealers.

>>33288001
It's impossible for intelligent men not to be. Society has rigged the game so that women can destroy our lives on a whim. Of course you'd be nervous about someone who can badly hurt you, that's basic survival instinct.

>>33287614
get yourself one of picrel and when you take one and she looks at you, offer a pez to her. if she takes it, tease her about taking candy from strangers. if she doesn't take one, praise her for the same reason like how prudent she is. then ask her about what she's doing there.
I've done this with multiple girls in all kinds of environments and I always got a conversation going and it wasn't awkward at all. just make sure you catch her looking at you before you offer her a pez.

>>33264539
if you are only attracted to 2% of women, you are gay

>>33288022
he asked how to approach women, not 9 year old girls.

>>33288001
You were able to get 40 first dates and you're still nervous?
How many of those dates turned into something more?

Well, my gf is essentially letting me down easy, at least I think that’s what she’s doing. She’s been acting really down for the last 2 weeks and when I picked her up from her parent’s house today she immediately started crying. I asked her if anything was wrong and all she had to say was “you wouldn’t get it”. I pressed further but she wouldn’t relent. As the day went on she expressed that we’ve grown up together (24 now, been dating since 21) and that she’s never just had to sit still and figure out her life for herself because there was always a relationship to lean back and depend on. She also said that I need to experience life as well. Idk what that even means. Is experiencing life just being an aimless nigger and moving around thinking that being in a different environment is going to somehow be better? Sounds like a great way to become 30, having no money, no skills, shit hobbies and look back at your existence and wonder where did it all go wrong… oh, and you won’t even have a significant other to make up for your sorry ass. Not even a month ago this bitch was talking about getting married. It’s funny how things change so quickly for women. Directionless little pathetic creatures, calling them subhuman would give them too much credit. I hate women so much. I hate my girlfriend for being such a fucking coward cunt and not explicitly saying that she wants to break up. I hate her with all my heart. There is no love on her end. I am merely someone to absorb all of her insanity and in the process become a fucking loon just like her. Fuck this slimy cunt bitch

>>33286648
I go regularly to the gym and have a good job
I pay attention to fashion, I have a nice haircut
Like the bare-minimums I have achieved.

I guess I am successful at that.
But, the bare-minimums feel like not enough from my experience

>>33276223
try being good looking next time buddy

>>33288405
this is a classic case that the girl gives up on you because you didn't get married

she wanted to get married and you didn't pull the trigger
so no she is questioning if being with you is worth it

this same thing happened to me, but it was because I didn't want to get married to the girl
and we like to blame the girl for not communicating, but she is asking the same thing, why is this guy not making the decision to stay and marry me or leave

>>33288480
She doesn’t want to get married anytime soon. I was the one that told her I want to marry her and she said that she wanted to wait til we were a bit older. That’s not the issue

I'll try that next time lil buddy

She’s just listening to music and drawing instead of expressing any kind of affection or care for me. She’s either extremely mentally ill or it’s over, probably both. I’d ask her if she’s done with me but she’s not really giving me the opportunity and all her family is here. It’s the most awkward shit just sitting in silence while she definitely has something to get off her chest. Do I just ask her to come outside and express my grief or what? This just sucks sitting here and not knowing what the hell is going on in her stupid little head. I work my ass off and now she wants to waste the 1 of 2 days I get off to fucking torture me. Must be nice having everything taken care of your whole life so you can just waste everyone else’s time because your time has NO FUCKING VALUE

If a woman at the gym makes proper eye contact with me at the gym and she's doing goofy on the mat exercises , do you think I should have commented? I was going to ask "what does this even train?"

She was on her back doing some weird puppy dog bicycle kicking (but vertical) type shit and no it wasn't a deadbug (proper core exercise) and we just locked eyes , I stared at her for like 2 seconds with a neutral half smile face and then just left cause my workout was done.

And it wasn't totally accidental either, she was looking straight ahead and then actively turned towards me.

>>33288862
You probably shouldn't ask it that way, but you could always say: "Hey, I've never seen that one before. What's that called and what does it do?" And you can even pretend that you'll try it.

>>33263842 (OP)
>no car
>no job
>can't cook
>live with mom
>no social skills, barely know how to say anything to hold a conversation
>never go outside
>know all of this while women literally orgasm at the sight of my in public because I'm handsome and slightly muscular
>never get women or get laid

It's so dreadful knowing all of this in the back of my mind when I encounter a woman. Even once I find work, I'll still struggle to hold a conversation. Is there hope for my to find a woman if I get my career on track and still have all the other downsides? I'm really insecure about my inability to conversate or drive (bad vision).

>>33288905
Don't sweat it, anon. You don't have to be all figured out for someone to like you, and a lot of people will be along for the ride while you're building yourself back up. Don't get discouraged.

>>33288873
but should I ask at all after missing the mark? I feel like I missed my shot today cause it was a natural asking point and now she's got me marked as a "beta" / not taking the lead type.

>>33285116
Same, they never show up to dates. I’m 30 years old and never been on a date in my life.
“Approaching women makes you look needy” ICK
“But women don’t approach first”
they do if you are attractive
>I am 6’8 and white
It’s never going to happen, every day is hell, I grow further from the accepted age gap and accused of being pedophile because I am interested in 18-24 year olds, because I have more in common with them, and am a virgin. And 18 isn’t the legal age of consent in my state, it’s 16 so I’m not looking for jailbait.

What kind of men do women fuck?

>>33288985
>What kind of men do women fuck?
the ones who challenge them and feel good in the moment
the ones they stick to are the same, but happen to be at a time when the women is physically looking to settle down

>>33287360
...

My point is if she's decided "oh he's attractive, I wish he'd talk to me."

>>33287420
Right, and my point is I just don't know what to say.

>>33288931
Well, if it happens again, you can ask, but now it's too late. You should have asked in the moment, though.

>>33288862
>>33288931
The line you want is, "That's a real exercise?" with a smile and she'll laugh and explain it to you. Let us know how it goes, good luck!

As a giga chad who is now in a polygamony marriage with Scarlett Johanson and Megan Foxx, getting massive threesomes daily. Don't believe the media. I'll tell you my secret. When I see a hot girl, I drop my pants and take a massive shit in front of them. How I managed to not be a cuck is I pee along it.

>>33287614
I'm trying to figure that out too, anon. If you discover the answer, please let me know. The one who sat near me yesterday was so attractive I could barely breath. Hopefully I see her again, only to blow it a second time.

>>33289243
breathe*, not breath, whoops

>>33289213
Colin Jessica Jost!

I don't know where to meet women at 34yo. Plz assist. I want meet enough to do a numbers game, but they've stopped going to bars/clubs/pubs at this age.

>>33288269
>You were able to get 40 first dates and you're still nervous?
It doesn't make sense but it's nerve racking every time. And the worst thing that ever happened on a date was that it was immediately obvious she wasn't into me and she went home after 40 minutes.

>How many of those dates turned into something more?
6-7 or so.

Guys
A woman I was interested in wasn't interested in me
So I was like "ok" and then I got over it
Ez

>>33289307
have you tried book clubs or walking clubs? i feel like everyone is in their 30s and i cant find women in their 20s

>go out to downtown where all the bars and clubs are on a saturday night
>the only women I see are there with a guy and/or fat
>drive through downtown on my way somewhere else on a saturday night
>sidewalks are fucking packed with groups of cute young women, pairs of cute young women, even cute young women going out alone

someone needs to fucking explain to me why the fuck this keeps happening because it's driving me insane. why is it that every time I go out looking to meet women there's fucking nobody but when I'm occupied and can't stop for a drink it's like single women's night or something. WHY

>>33289407
Neither, I won't enjoy walking though, I already powerlift to exhaustion every week. How do book clubs work?

>>33289432
You've posted this before. You've tried again since and it still keeps happening?

>>33289307
I'm struggling really hard too. I had a relationship for 13 years and now I feel absolutely marooned at 33 like I've wasted most of my life. I don't remember the last time I even saw a single girl I was attracted to.

>>33289534
YES bro it's been a few threads.. it keeps fucking happening every time I go out it's dead and every time I pass through on other business it's nothing but women just walking around with their cute low cut shirts and tight pants or tight dresses I'm going fucking insane I WANT SEX NOW NOW NOW

>go to usual bar
>tan slim latina with FAT tiddies in loose top shows up with her fat goblina friend
>giving me the eyes for like an hour but I just know the fatty is gonna be a problem if I approach
>they leave after a while
>spend the rest of the night thinking about her and her MASSIVE juicy tits

they were fucking huge bros, you have no idea. I even considered sneaking a picture but was scared of getting caught and kicked out or something. if her fat friend hadn't been there I probably would've worked up the courage to go over and say something.
I hate fat women so much bros.

>>33288405
>24 now, been dating since 21

Be glad you found this out now, because the "love of my life" pulled this shit after we had already bought a three bedroom house to raise a family in. She turned 30 and got cold feet. Now she has a ton of tattoos and went from "first and only everything with me, highschool sweetheart" to a double digit body count. And I'm stuck waiting to figure out when to sell this stupid house. I just keep hoping for life to turn around.

>>33288405
sorry anon :/

Social pressure is strong for women. If society tells them to be faithful, take care of the home, and raise the kids, that's what they'll do. If, however, society tells them to "be a free spirit," well, then that's what they'll do.

>>33289582
I don't know what the solution to this is. I feel like everything is just fucked if you want to find a good woman in my area. Maybe I need to just move to a completely different society.

If I'm almost 30 in a wagie job (security guard in a warehouse; upskilling to get into a new career) and suspect I have a bad reputation at my workplace, how would I go about changing it? Assume I'm a typical KHV with no charisma who everyone thinks is creepy for speaking low and mumbling, and gets cussed at for screening people as they leave the building. Most women in the building ignore me when I try to talk or say hello, or give me attitude when I ask to check their stuff at the x-ray machine.

>>33289644
Since you're a cop for your workplace the main way would require you to do your job poorly (let people in and out without hassling them, etc). Other than that you could become hot so they like interacting with you.

>>33289644
uh, change your entire personality and appearance lol. Not sure what we can do for you

>>33263842 (OP)
How do I trick myself into going out to places on my own to meet people? If I'm not with friends or out doing my nerd hobbies somewhere, I'll just stay home. When I am out with friends, we're doing our thing and I'm not going to ditch them to talk to randos.

I have gone to bars a handful of times alone, but never initiated a conversation with anyone there because I simply had no interest. I've gone to a bar a few times in the past simply to have a drink, eat, and read a book in the corner for a bit, and that is more enjoyable than any conversation I've had with some rando when sitting at the bar.

Am I just not doing it right?

>>33289654
>would require you to do your job poorly
As silly as it sounds, I'm not trying to jeopardize my job just to get people to like me. If they're willing to give me an attitude over simply asking to see a bag or phone, then I don't care to go any further with an interaction beyond what's necessary. Other guards have said and done worse shit at the job, but people seem to like them much more.
>become hot so they like interacting with you.
>>33289655
>change your entire personality and appearance lol.
So just looksmax?

>>33289673
As someone also currently having trouble with this, you just gotta get a little buzzed and then find the right person/people to talk to.

>>33289687
>So just looksmax?
Become friendly and likeable, but yes, becoming attractive would help a ton.

Always had "long term relationship, open to short" tag on Tinder to lure in girls who were open to ONS, but didn't advertise the fact. I'm considering switching to "long term relationship" tag, even though I'm mostly interested in ONS and maybe something longer if the girl is cool
>why don't you just say you're looking to fuck
Because that's like 95% guys on Tinder

for the more experienced gentlemen, id like some general tips for sex. you can skip the obvious ones (long foreplay, oral, communication)

>>33289881
Eating pussy is fun and women love it. No reason not to do it

Women love being desired, always bang her like you've just got out of jail

>>33289888
thats pretty fucking solid advice

>>33289397
Every woman I’ve found attractive was not interested in even having a date with me

I studied these books and managed to get GF

I looksmaxxed and charismaxxed, but now I have an issue where I keep almost getting girls but because I'm not aggressive/persistent in my advances, girls either assume I'm not that interested or just wait for me to do it because why would they, there's always another guy that gives them attention. For me it's extremely hard because I'm very used to my advances being unwanted, even though now they would be most of the time. On the flip side, I started getting lots of attention from bottom of the barrel girls that don't receive much attention and see me as a chad that finally wants them because I don't reject them outright either. Basically I always keep a funny and flirty vibe with everyone, just paying more attention to the ones I'm attracted to, but still keeping it kinda ambiguous.

Any advice would be appreciated.

>>33290710
What kind of advice are you looking for? Sounds like you've got it handled and know what the issue is. Just start being more forward, asking girls for their number, asking them to get a drink, and/or inviting them over to your place. If you know them well enough, just go with "hey, wanna come over and hangout?"

>>33290750
Well, the issue is that also a lot of this happens in a shared community space, so I have to gracefully handle rejecting the fatties lest I get a reputation of an asshole, at this point I'm just wasting a shitton of time I could be getting to know or hitting on hot ones talking to the ugly persistent ones instead. And since this is really new to me, I have no clue how to reject people. I've actually fucked a few of them just because it was easier than saying no.

>>33290750
>>33290761
Also, is it at all possible to get hit on by attractive women at some level of attractiveness or is it just some dream for top 0.001%? Cause that's what I truly would want to happen, just playing girls into fucking me doesn't give me that much satisfaction.

>>33290761
>>33290766
I still don't know what you're asking for advice on. Just... don't sleep with the unattractive ones, and be more forward with the ones you are attractive to.

>>33290766
You sound like a typical lazy narcissist who just wants to be able to sit back and be fawned over.
Yes, attractive women will show interest in you if you're attractive yourself. But it's still your game to lose. YOU have to show your own interest, YOU have to flirt or shoot your shot, YOU have to actually act like an attractive guy and not an unconfident sperg.
One thing a lot of you guys don't get is that when you're good looking, girls expect you to actually know it and act like it. That means knowing how to talk to women and not being afraid of them.

>>33276223
Nah, the fun is just starting. Just go next week same time and when you run into her just smile and say hi or wave at her from a couple meters away (or yards or whatever). The ice is broken. Now you just got to normalize your being there. You got this, Casanova!

>>33278836
Ask her what cup size she has. I've had a lot of success with that. Honestly.

>>33290773
>I still don't know what you're asking for advice on
On how to avoid the ugly ones without coming off as an asshole (that both feels bad and can give me a bad reputation)
>>33290782
>You sound like a typical lazy narcissist who just wants to be able to sit back and be fawned over.
Correct and I don't see anything wrong with that, almost every woman does this.
>Yes, attractive women will show interest in you if you're attractive yourself. But it's still your game to lose.
Yea but they "show interest" in the most non-committal way possible. Meanwhile if I'm not borderline harassing her, I'm apparently not acting interested enough.
>YOU have to show your own interest, YOU have to flirt or shoot your shot, YOU have to actually act like an attractive guy and not an unconfident sperg.
>One thing a lot of you guys don't get is that when you're good looking, girls expect you to actually know it and act like it. That means knowing how to talk to women and not being afraid of them.
Yeah, I 100% get that but since I wasn't attractive until recently, I'm not good at it and I am an unconfident sperg. Except whereas before the impression was that I'm an unconfident sperg not worth acknowledging, now the impression is that I'm an attractive asshole blowing them off. This is what I cannot currently reconcile and figure out how to solve. Idk if it just builds up with time and practice or whatever, this is just uncharted territory to me.

>>33290798
You just... don't ask them to come over, and if they invite you over you say no. wtf

Does your penis have a mind of its own?

>>33290809
No, my penis is very much in sync in that I'm getting ED whenever I'm with a girl who I'm not super into. And I don't mean I invite them over, some of this stuff happens at events where fucking is allowed, or it's not fucking but we do some make out shit (boy do they seem to like making out for ages) and missing all opportunity to get together with women who I'm interested in.

I know this sounds super retarded and weak, but that's how I am on the inside.

>>33290798
>Correct and I don't see anything wrong with that, almost every woman does this.
And are you a woman anon? I see a big problem with you acting and thinking like a woman, and so should you. Women sure as fuck will too, believe it or not.
>Meanwhile if I'm not borderline harassing her, I'm apparently not acting interested enough.
Yes. You have to flirt, you have to ask them out, exactly what I just said. The rules don't change because you had some kind of a glow-up and look better now. No one skips the line.
>but since I wasn't attractive until recently, I'm not good at it and I am an unconfident sperg.
I know that anon, it was loud and clear in your post. I went through the exact same thing when I was younger.
Yes, it gets better with practice. But you have to learn some game, you have to learn how to talk to and flirt with women, you have to feel comfortable in your own skin and you have to be confident in yourself. It all gets better with practice, IF you practice.

>>33290825
Sigh. With the girls you aren't attracted to and don't want to ultimately hook up with, talk about the other girl you are interested in. She'll get the hint.

>>33290831
>And are you a woman anon? I see a big problem with you acting and thinking like a woman, and so should you. Women sure as fuck will too, believe it or not.
I mean I don't really give a fuck, I like what I like. I'm not really into vapid trad whores anyway.
>Yes. You have to flirt, you have to ask them out, exactly what I just said. The rules don't change because you had some kind of a glow-up and look better now. No one skips the line.
Yeah okay. Is there a way to not fast track a girl into your bed without giving the impression that you're stringing her along or are uninterested?
>Yes, it gets better with practice. But you have to learn some game, you have to learn how to talk to and flirt with women, you have to feel comfortable in your own skin and you have to be confident in yourself. It all gets better with practice, IF you practice.
I'm very good at flirting, the issue lies precisely at the moment of turning it from flirting to a direct "I wanna fuck you" message. I just cannot seem to get over that hump and keep things on that line forever until I see some confirmation from the girl that she's 100%, without a doubt, is also into that. Of course even the most assertive and interested girls I've encountered don't fucking do that...
>>33290835
Actually not a bad idea, maybe I could use this.

>>33276223
>don't think I can go back to that store
¿??¿?

At least you initiated and gave it a shot. Rejection and awkwardness can be detrimental the first few times approaching girls. But this shouldn't demoralise you to talk to girls. Maybe after fifteen rejections, you will finally meet a potential friend/partner.

>>33263842 (OP)
>28M
>Graduate Engineering Degree
>6 figure income and 6 figure savings per year(depending on bonus) living at home with mom spending just 1500-2k per month, just continuation of prior NEET life but with a job now.
>215lb still /fat/ (down from 255lb last year, and gained some muscle 1.5 years lifting and 1 year dieting)
>Autistic, extremely extroverted kind always talking about politics/literature/anime
>never had a GF
bros, my friends tell me that I'm a sleeping giant once I lose some more weight and wear nice cloths. I just have such terrible luck, never get any female attention. No luck on the dating apps. I don't want to spend money on women or be used by them(I want to FIRE/coast FIRE in a few years), and at the same time I have no idea what to talk to them about. I feel like I have a good personality but evidence shows that maybe not. Advice? Will things magically change once I'm not longer a /fat/, and wear nice cloths and stop being a schizo?

>>33290952
Forgot to mention also balding but have full beard, will probably go shaved head(maybe clean shave beard) once I lose some more weight. Also I'm 5'11-6' tall. As well, I'm brown.

>>33290952
It's really just the weight.

>>33290964
Interesting, thing is I wasn't always a fat, there'd been times in my life I was 180 at my same height(before college) and still had the same problems. I'm not a land whale, just a belly and some in the face.

Noted and appreciated though.

I got a second date despite acting like a complete autist on the first one.

>>33276223
>asks me to please leave her alone
im ngl anon id be salty too depending how annoying you were being. that shit always stings whenever a woman says that especially if you weren't a creep or autist

femanons, is it weird to approach a woman in the gym and just strike a short casual convo? i've been crushing on this cute girl that i see whenever i go to the gym but i feel like its rude to try and talk to people when they're working out but i still want to shoot my shot without looking like a sperg. she hasn't been at the gym in a while so i think id like to get her number at the very least. i know cold approaching isn't really a good idea anymore but still. pls help an austistic man

>>33290998
second dates are a good sign unless shes using you for a free meal. switch it up on the second one. ask if she wants to do something other than grabbing food

>>33291066
I've been rotting in the gym for 15 years and I've know only of two examples of people hooking up and in both cases it was personal trainer and client.
I think almost any other place would be better. Does she talk to anyone else at the gym? Does she wear headphones?

>>33291085
i saw her playing on her nintendo ds on an elliptical but i dont think she wore headphones. every now and then we would glance at each other but i feel like its cause she noticed me looking at her every now and then. not like staring obviously but just catching glances

Wow guys look what I found! This is what you can pull off by being good at holding frame!

As a 5' balding indian janitor, I never had a lot of success with women. I will get started learning game right now so I can do the same soon! Can't wait!

>match with girl on Hinge
>her profile had a poll of "Would you rather: Tits, Ass, Can't Decide"
>i like "Ass" and say "Very to the point"
>She responds "Yeah I don't like to waste time"

How do I proceed? I don't think I'll actually go out with her (honestly not my type but I guess my coomer brain was activated when I liked) but I want to use the opportunity to practice being, idk, "suggestive" with a girl (I'm a v loser, sorry). I feel like I always end up acting too platonic with girls I go out with, so I feel like I should use this chance to get out of that habit.

>inb4 faggot, it's already over, etc.
I know, I'm earnestly trying to stop being such a beta faggot.

>>33291412

Just say anything you feel like bro, who cares, you probably have hundreds of other matches like most guys

>>33291430
if i had hundreds of other matches i wouldn't be here lmao

>>33291457

I know just kidding kek.

It's a joke I make sometimes because some guys try to act like getting girls is easy, when everybody knows it's not.

>>33277982
She sounds autistic but you like her for a reason, right? Just talk to her and ask where her head's at. If she responds negatively, leave.

>>33281934
You’re retarded

>>33289888
This

I'm 33 and I can't tell if a good women is simply found, or you make her want to be one.

>>33291475
you can't turn a whore into a housewife. do what that info what you will

I know this may be an autistic question, but do girls really feel attraction for quiet or introverted personalities? I always hear people saying about how there's always someone who'll appreciate your qualities, but I haven't seen anyone appreciate those kinds of qualities when it comes to romance. It's always the extroverted, charismatic types.

>>33291485
This. I've seen women who were hoes become good housewives, but they have to want to themselves. And usually when they want to, they slowly start ditching their previous hoe lifestyle like clubbing and random hookups and what not.

But you can never make a girl who wants to party, settle down. They always want more and won't be happy with the housewife life, at least not yet.

That's why your best bet is going to places that attract people who have their lives together. Like, if you go to pilates or yoga or cardio or whatever class at 9:30 AM on the weekend for example, well there's a much higher chance they have their lives together than some random thot you made out with at the club.

>>33291510
i think you can be introverted/quiet and still be charismatic, at least a little bit.

fwiw i have a female friend who's engaged to a guy who used to be a drug addict, has no real social circle, and spends most of his time in his room when my friends and I go over to their place. She does genuinely love him it seems, so it IS possible for non-extroverts to get girls. I don't know what she sees in him desu, I guess he sort of acts like a man (he owns a rifle and is frugal with money?)?

>>33291510
Being quiet and introverted is fine, there are plenty of masculine tropes around the strong silent type - James Bond for example doesn't talk much, or Ryan Gosling in Drive.

But if you mean being shy, then yeah, that's a problem. Being shy means you lack confidence, and men who lack confidence are a turn-off to women. If you're really physically attractive they might find it cute at first, but eventually they'll get sick of it.

You don't need to force yourself to talk for the sake of it, you just need to be confident in the things you do say.

Do women like stoic men?

>>33291514
>That's why your best bet is going to places that attract people who have their lives together.

Its a double edged sword because most the girls at those places with their lives together are taken.

>>33291587
if they are attractive sure. you have to remember to be attractive. for which you basically just need to have good genetics and an aesthetic face. it's that easy!

>>33291587
Women like a guy who is like the second main character in their life story. They like the way second main characters listen to them and help them with their life. If you are just some fucking weirdo like me they won't deal with you, but would rather just feel off about you like you're some rabid animal or some shit like that like they usually do.

>>33290870
>fifteen rejections
nigga I contemplated ending it all after the one rejection I got, I'm not doing that 14 more times.

>>33285326
>>33291046
>depending how annoying you were being
I was just asking basic stuff like how her day was going, if she's from the area, if this was her day off or something (it was Tuesday).

>>33291587
>stoicism
2019 reddit called nigga
stoicism was "created" by a politician who was preoccupied with running a country while his wife cheated on him with a gladiator. it has no place in a modern lifestyle
>dude like just don't care about anything lmao
it's not a young man's philosophy. it's a philosophy for dudes in their 40s and 50s whose fire died long ago.

>do women like stoic men
if you tried explaining stoicism to a woman you'd get laughed at and rightfully so

Do I have to become a normie to get a gf?

>>33291660
no you can also kidnap a 14yo girl

>>33291651
>contemplated ending it all after the one rejection I got, I'm not doing that 14 more times.
you're just doomed then. even Chad and Tyrone get rejected 10+times for every color approach that works

>>33291657
>stoicism was "created" by a politician who was preoccupied with running a country while his wife cheated on him with a gladiator. it has no place in a modern lifestyle
false. zeno of citium was a merchant noted as being a dark skinned Phoenician or part Phoenician in every source that still exists about him. he would not have been allowed in Greek politics

>>33291672
>even Chad and Tyrone get rejected 10+times for every color approach that works

they don't jfl

>>33291510
Get fit ans attractive. The hot nerd type does well.

>>33286671
i've been doing this. i still have zero success socially but it has definitely been good for me.

Ask yourself if this beautiful woman you are with has deep feelings for you that she would not have for anyone else.

>some men have so much sex it ruins their lives and they need to go to therapy (and end up fucking half the women in the group almost by accident)
>other men are so desperate and lonely they turn to anonymous online imageboards for "advice" from other desperate lonely men and are one more ghosting away from going full elliot rodger or roping

how do we explain such a chasm in the experiences of otherwise similar men

>>33292231
The incels are like that because they assume a relationship will end their dangerous boredom. What they need to do is face their boredom head on with a therapist and psychiatrist instead of just going around nit picking at successful people with envy. Having this ugly mindset that teachers were stupid to give to children, that being told life will be handed to you if you go to school enough. I know deep down inside that is bullshit because my older brother is working an entry level job instead of the job his master's degree gave him. Absolute bullshit. Worst part is too, he didn't work towards the other jobs his degree gave him, but instead only picked the ones he couldn't find an excuse with. That is the issue with most people I see now. I can get practical healthwise excuses, but there are way too many excuses people make because it doesn't feel or fit right. You got to sweat, and unfortunately that doesn't hit people because they'd rather just lazily use their brain, make a sensible excuse why they can't do everything, and then get rewarded and called Einstein. Einstein worked his ass off to be a physicist and so do Stephen Hawking. The same is needed to be said for you and girlfriends.

>>33292231
>>some men have so much sex it ruins their lives
They also feel a huge void because they thought they would be satisfied with many women, some are able to realize and fill this void by going to church and seeking God and settling down with a Christian wife.

legitimately HOW do you approach a woman with huge tits without it being blatantly obvious that you're only approaching her because of her tits? you know, she knows, everyone around you knows. do you just pretend to not notice she's stacked?

I've gotten to the point where I'm really good at approaching in person and getting numbers/instas. I have like a 60-70% success rate with that. But where I fail is in texting. I have terrible trouble converting these into dates. I know a lot of times a girl giving you a contact doesn't guarantee she wants to date you, but I'm positive for sure that my text game is stopping me from having even greater success.

>>33292641
>Have we met before?

Alright that's 3 times in a row now the moment I try to turn passerby quips into real conversation I get left on seen. Self esteem really starting to take a toll, didn't think I was *that* ugly

>>33292641
You don't. Just approach her, and if anything, women with big tits are usually proud of them. That shouldn't do anything to dissuade you.

>>33292641
Every woman already knows why a man approaches her when she is approached, it doesn't matter why retard. The worst thing you can do is approach her hiding your intentions because then she will see that you are being fake and you will end up falling into the friend zone for never trying to be sexual.

>>33279497
Who the fuck told you that, "bitches love emoticons" is a phrase as old as the internet itself

>>33281171
In those exact words? I have no idea how to get sexual, help a fella out here

>>33292641
Its not important to hide your physical attraction to her. Its important that she be more than her physical beauty. Dates are for her to prove that she is more than that AND that those things are what you've looking for.

>>33281322
How can I feel this out? I'm terrified of getting called a creep and it spreads or someshit

>>33292641
Maybe approach and say something like "hey I just saw you and I think you look gorgeous, I'd like to get to know you better" Not too "safe" but no too overly sexual imo.

What do I do about having 0 capacity for holding conversation? If I watch a movie and they ask what I thought, I usually have almost nothing to say beyond "I liked/disliked it". Talking just isn't in my nature.

Would a woman still want a guy who's just not able to be interesting in conversation and doesn't do much that's interesting either? I'm pretty much just a. guy who plays video games and works. I don't do anything else really or have much to talk about.

>>33281171
>>33281322
>2nd night
Can you tell the steps in detail?

>>33292768
Surely you must have another hobby besides videogames, even if you're not really deep into it. Do you like movies, books, paintings, food, any kind of craft, sport, etc...?

As for how to be better at a conversation, you jsut have to try a bit more. After watching a movie, try to think a bit deeper than "liked/disliked". What did you think of the characters, the music, the cinematography? Did you like some acting in particular? Was there something that made you think? You can turn almost everything into a conversation topic, you just need to believe that people will at least try to engage with it.

>>33284689
Maybe it’s just my depression or whatever the hell I’m going through mentally, but honestly, I don’t give a damn about saying the 'right' thing. In my experience, most women don’t show much depth of intelligence, they usually talk about trivial stuff like dogs, nails, or whatever the latest media trend is. The rare intelligent ones are great to meet, but somehow they always end up being messed up in the head. Honestly, I think everyone these days is mentally ill to some extent.

Focus on learning things that contribute to your own growth, not just things to keep up conversations. Still, ignorance really can be bliss. Don’t dive too deep into understanding people or society, it’ll just drain you.

>>33284977
Dating is really a path to marriage, you're right about that. But being a womanizer isn’t exactly the best path to follow. It might feel thrilling sometimes, but honestly, it’s mostly empty and sad once you truly understand yourself and what life is really about.
I'm not judging you, though. In my opinion, you need to become the kind of person you’d want to marry.
Once you realize that keeping a bunch of women orbiting around you, like many women do with men, makes no real sense, because you’re wasting both their time and your own, you’ll start to rethink your life.

>>33292642
>I've gotten to the point where I'm really good at approaching in person and getting numbers/instas.
How so? Any advice?

>>33292794
>Surely you must have another hobby besides videogames
Beyond watching random YouTube videos nope.

>>33284680
I literally did nothing, I just made my presence known and horny women came to me explicitly.

But I kept doing nothing and nothing happened and I missed opportunities.

>>33292844
>In my opinion, you need to become the kind of person you’d want to marry.
I have to put the reps in because my social skills are comparatively bunk. Understanding what I do and don't like about specific women, what I should and shouldn't do, knowing when a woman is lying, that's easy enough to talk about but the only way to truly learn to do it is do it.
>a bunch of women
lol
lmao even

>>33293007
Yeah well those horny women were probably just on the third stage of the iceberg.

Most I got a woman was on Buddy. I'd be lucky if she dug deep enough to the bottom.

I don't have my computer on me, so I can't do the meme. So far everyone here is on the second level or first one.

Look at pic related and compare to my notes:

Iceberg:
1: Stranger
2: Good stranger
3: Nice person
4: Acquiantence
5: Good Acquiantence
6: Buddy
7: Friend
8: Good friend
9: Best friend
10: Bro/Sis
11: Cat/Dog
12: Girl I had a fling with
13: Girl who is a FWB
14: Girlfriend
15: Long term girlfriend
16: Engaged girlfriend
17: Wife
18: Long term Wife
19: Wife who will never divorce me.

Each level takes more digging deeply than the next one. Jumping levels is foolish. If you want to know a girl likes you she will try everything possible to dig deeper at these levels.

>>33292850
Just forcing myself to do it. There's always a barrier of fear when I haven't done it in a while. And after I got out of a relationship last year I was rusty.
But this last month or two I've been really making an effort to talk to cute girls whenever I see them.

I've recently been watching this guy's videos. He has a pretty basic approach template.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JomeclsSaQs

Gf and I are on a temporary break until she gets her shit together, she said I should try dating other women tho to see if I really want her or not. I only have eyes for her, my gf is the only women that I've loved and lusted for. I've never seen another one in real life that has been able to stimulate my mind the way that she has. I almost want to do it just so I can prove to her that I do love her and only her, and that I'm not with her just because it's easy (it isn't easy dating someone who mentally breaks down once every few months and I end up being a therapist for a week), but I digress. Should I do it?

>>33293114
I will put a handle on that advice. Stop expecting reward. You can look towards it and love it when you get it. However expect things in steps. Remember the ice berg I shared too. A lot of people on the street are either second layer or third layer. If you are going above the first layer which is stranger you're honestly being mean.

>>33263842 (OP)
I had an idea of hiring a sugar baby to be a wing women for me and help me seduce other women. Good idea? I made it with crypto so money isn't an issue. I'm going off the idea that women will hook up with guys if other women vouch for them or have her befriend them and then she spontaneously pushs the idea for a random threesome

>>33293127
She only said that because she's seeing or has intentions of seeing someone else. Don't do that. She will resent you if that isn't the case, and you're not going to work out.

>>33293543
Well she said she isn't going to see anyone and that she still loves me. I believe her, she's never lied to me before and she's still inviting me to go celebrate the 4th of july with her family this week because "It would be weird if there was just 1 year in the family photos where you weren't there", so she fully intends on getting back together with me unless I choose not to. I just don't know how long I'll have to wait

>>33264523
Look how much taller he is compared to everyone in the background.

>>33293608
>Well she said she isn't going to see anyone
That will either change or she's going to use you seeing someone else to resent you later. Don't fall for the trap. Tell her you don't want that, and you can give her some space, but that's it. If she still goes out and cheats, you'll know that was the plan from the start.

>>33293127
>Gf and I are on a temporary bre-
lol

>>33293640
>If she still goes out and cheats, you'll know that was the plan from the start.
Yeah at the point, it's over and I'm done with her. Thanks for the advice. I'll just wait it out

I can't really figure out when's an indication to pursue a relationship with a woman. I've had several that regularly strike up conversations with me and hang around, but every time I think they might be attracted and make a move, they withdraw instantly. Even my last girlfriend, when I finally asked her out on a date, initially declined and only when she realized I wasn't going to ask twice did she try everything in her power to get with me.

What are the signs that there may be some romantic feelings in a woman towards you vs them just seeing you as an acquaintance?

>>33293114
Watching the video, thanks.

Chad slayer tip: fuck women who are moving soon

Should i just fuck sluts?
I have plenty of sluts who are my friends or women hitting me up on datings apps to fuck.

I don't like Casual sex but i think it might it's all i can get for the next year while sort out some stuff out.

I just feel so lonly since me and my ex split.

>>33293971
It's not healthy if you're not into it. A lot of those girls will give you emotional support, though, so it's not like it's only physical. It can be nice to feel wanted for once.

>>33292648
reward yourself for trying bro
life is really hard
and the fact you're even trying is better than many guys

the outcome is just a result of perseverance
don't focus on the results, be patient with yourself, and forgive yourself for mistakes

as for texting:
the number one rule is to match her length and tone or even a level below her effort while moving convos forward

>>33293799
>I can't really figure out when's an indication to pursue a relationship with a woman.
You don't. This is the woman's role, when the time comes for her to ask what kind of relationship you two have, then you answer something. In the meantime, you show indifference to having a relationship, only showing sexual interest.
>I think they might be attracted and make a move, they withdraw instantly
>when I finally asked her out on a date, initially declined and only when she realized I wasn't going to ask twice did she try everything in her power to get with me.
Women do this all the time, it's a seduction tactic to send mixed signals of interest and disinterest so they can get into the man's head, it happened to me several times, one day the girl would rub her ass on me, and the next day she wouldn't even talk to me.
>What are the signs that there may be some romantic feelings in a woman towards you vs them just seeing you as an acquaintance?
She will make it obvious when she sends sexual signals of interest.

Is it worse to be a virgin or only having sex once in your life? I had a short 3 month relationship where that happened. I really don't feel much of a pressure to get a relationship or hooking up, but it could happen I meet a woman I like and the topic of my past relationships could come up.

How do I get a black gf? I'm a nerdy white guy and I feel like they don't look at me for more than a second

>>33288130
Pale white women ages 18-24 makeup 2% of the planet’s population, I do not find obesity attractive. Tattoos are ugly, piercings are ugly.

If you go the gym and its shift change and the staff look at you and go "yep he's here" , one guy and one girl and they both stare at you

Is this a good sign or a bad sign for your reputation at the gym? For the record I don't make eye contact or anything with any of these people, not even entering or exiting the place.

new thread
>>33295953

>>33295953

>>33295953

>>33295904
> "yep he's here"
>I don't make eye contact or anything with any of these people
that's why

>>33296145
but is it a nothingburger ? Or basically is my name getting smeared / gossiped over this?

What about already having a woman and needing to survive pre-menstruation rage every month? How do I handle it in the best way?

>>33296215
They don’t give a shit about you, they probably just think to themselves that you’re a weirdo without giving you a second thought before going on about their day.

>>33297069
Chad doesn't endure pre-menstruation rage. It's just her excuse to express her lack of physical attraction toward you.