I’m in conflict with my identity. There are charactaristics that seem to be unalterable, and I fear not much can be done to change them. Intelligence, mental disorders, personality, perspective, social skills, all are for the most part defined by genetics and early childhood environment. Every time I find an issue I wish to fix, I discover it to be apart of these categories. The biggest problem I’m encountering is that these traits fluctuate. At times I can be so dysfunctional, mentally foggy, disorganized, unable to speak coherently, and process information well. Most of the time I just feel inadequate in these qualities. Then, there are rare moments that it’s as if my ‘iq’ magically goes up by two standard deviation. The difference is uncanny, and every trait I’ve listed above is shown to me in the capacity which I long for. How can I go from such a neurodegenerative like condition to an exceptionally functional person. I don’t abuse substances, I eat clean, exercise daily. Could this be caused by dpdr? Is this just a symptom of adhd/aspergers?

might just be flow state. I'm usually an unfocused dimwit until 5-10 minutes of solid uninterrupted work.

>>33280734 (OP)
Identity is continuously being formed. Therapy can help make the changes you want to see.