so im in a “relationship” with this guy but it’s honestly such a bother. i don’t know what my feelings are for him. he definitely likes me romantically but im getting annoyed at the fact that he has to call, text or hang out with me daily and i don’t really have time for myself. of course i know that any normal person would just say “hey could you leave me alone for the day” but that’s kind of not possible since he would get upset and then he would think i don’t want anything to do with him and then it would be more work for me because i would have to explain him that i don’t hate him and i don’t have the energy for such things. i also can’t be rude to him in the slightest even when im in a shitty mood because he would again be upset at me and he would go straight to his friends and complain. he keeps on telling me to act the way i want but i know i can’t do that since i often make rather offensive joke of course i always make sure that the person is fine if i joke around like that but he again would get upset and i honestly just don’t have the energy to deal with him. i wouldn’t mind texting him from time to time or staying friends with him but i don’t think i can do this whole relationship thing long term it’s fucking me up mentally i have not felt this mentally tired since a really long time. now another thing is i don’t want to be on bad terms with him as he lives close by and it would just be awkward if i accidentally ran into him i was thinking of just playing the girlfriend act but i know i would just make my mental health worse than it already is.

wow, is this how girls are
>i'll be his gf though i'd rather not

>>33315455 (OP)
maybe try writing on a paper all the things you want to tell him

not with the intention that you will show him the paper

but for the purpose of clarying things in your head

honestly it'd be better for you to break this

i’m also not sure if i’m just not into guys because i already knew way before that so maybe that’s also a reason for why i feel this way but i don’t know

>don't actually like my partner
>what should i do?
Gee, I wonder what the best decision here is

I can't believe people come to 4chan asking such things. People here are stupid, but not this stupid. Where are you people coming from

>>33315636
It’s women asking this stuff. 90% of posts on advice are women writing a huge paragraphical wall of text talking about why her boyfriend looked at her the wrong way yesterday and she thinks he’s going to murder her now

>>33315631
i know i should break up with but then i would end up being a complete and total piece of shit in his opinion who just used him and manipulated him because he doesn’t take rejection well

>>33315667
you are not responsible for his feelings

>>33315455 (OP)
>but im getting annoyed at the fact that he has to call, text or hang out with me daily
It takes a couple of minutes a day to briefly talk to someone, and not even people who work 100 hours a week are too busy for that. I think you might be overestimating his expectations and assuming you aren't allowed to do other things. Someone asking to spend time with you daily doesn't mean you have to say yes if you want to do other things or are busy. The flip side of this is true as well, you can't be an aloof avoidant person who won't do things with your partner for multiple days or weeks at a time without a good reason. That's not how relationships work. All you have to do is send him a quick. Hello, love, you, and goodnight daily and spend time with him every once in a while.
>also can’t be rude to him in the slightest even when im in a shitty mood... of course i always make sure that the person is fine if i joke around like that
Not taking your anger out on your partner is kind of an expectation. Nor is putting someone down and playing it off as just jokes. There is a difference between banter and being an asshole.

Literally talk to him about his expectations and yours, they probably are not what you think they are. Find out what he is sensitive about and don't joke about that. That's all it is. It sounds like you have problems with intimacy and avoidance.

>>33315695
are you nuts, it's obvious she shouldn't be with him

>>33315701
Not at all, it's very obvious she is resentful. People exaggerate problems when they are like that.

>>33315701
She outright admits to not just telling him that she is busy when he wants to do something, because of a fear of a conflict. When avoiding those conversations is what causes these sorts of conflicts.

Conflict avoidance is unhealthy and leads to negative outcomes for all parties. It's actually amazing how many people assume they have to do all these things and can never say no to be the best partner ever, burn themselves out, and then become resentful about it because they don't set boundaries.

I could be wrong, and maybe her boyfriend is mentally ill and needs to go to therapy for an attachment issue. But even if that is the case, that's still is something that could have been resolved ages ago by just confronting him and talking about the issue. She should have drawn a line in the sand that he needs to get help or she are leaving for her own mental health.

>>33315667
>not compatible with someone
>i'm going to pretend we are
>oh no, someone's feelings are hurt
>must be their fault

what's the problem with just telling him about it?
If he is a mentally healthy person, he will understand you and will try to save the relationship.

>>33315881
he’s not he goes to therapy and admitted to me a while back that he has an obsession with me

>>33315892
So then leave him and let him be obsessed with somebody else

Sounds like a NICE guy. Leave me now to save everyone the trouble

>>33315463
If you act in that manner you too will have women that rather not

>>33315892
If you want to fix it then set boundaries about what you expect in a relationship, and let him know clearly that you cannot be with him for your own health if those boundaries are crossed. Afterwards make sure his therapist knows he is like this. Otherwise, just leave and tell him why so he might unfuck himself when he meets someone else.

>>33315455 (OP)
>so im in a “relationship” with this guy but it’s honestly such a bother. i don’t know what my feelings are for him.
You're a fucking idiot. Don't enter relationships with people who you don't have feelings for, stupid bitch.

>>33315470
You're mentally retarded and were likely molested as a child as well. Such a fucking child incapable of basic communication, just off yourself, JFC