Thread 33443050

How do you deal with one sided friendships & people you care about that don't put effort into talking?

The moment you stop making an effort, everything stops.

>>33443050 (OP)
all relationships take work
if you feel like it's truly one sided, make new friends

>>33443050 (OP)
Well stop talking to them lmao

>>33443050 (OP)
I can't tell you because that's how most of my friend relationships are.
To be fair, I think that most male/male friendships are, especially post-college if you live in different cities.
I can think of 2 guys I always initiate meetups with every 6 months, but they've still invited me to their weddings, so I guess they reciprocated eventually.

>>33443050 (OP)
Depends I guess. Do you get the feeling, when interacting with them, that they don't like to talk? Like do they show disinterest in continuing the conversation or activity?

If they just need the initial push, but after it they interact normally, then I think it's fine. For example, in my group(s) of friends, I usually hardly ever make the initial effort to initiate conversation, but I do enjoy when people invite me and all.

Now if they act all bored and uninterested in interacting, then I think it's best to just leave them be. Wait for them to talk, if they want.

>>33443050 (OP)
When you initiate things, people get used to you initiating things. You're training them to expect you to make the effort. If you suddenly stopped, it'd likely be interpreted as you suddenly not caring or wanting to distance yourself. Just how it is. It's very rarely an equal share of initiation.

>>33443056
>all relationships take work
Almost true
All relationships require effort (although how much effort is needed is case-by-case in nature), it's just that truly meaningful friendships and relationships never feel like work even when you put a lot of it in

>>33443050 (OP)
Imagine getting a blowjob from her in that position while touching her ass.

>>33443050 (OP)
keep putting in effort, meet their friends, use them for networking/appearing well-adjusted to others and ditch them once you find people who don't suck

>>33443279
a matter of perspective I guess
work is work, but if someone is really important to you, you will put in the work, even when you're down and really don't want to, because they are worth it

>>33443050 (OP)
I ditched all of them after high school and any people I met in the years since that I realized were similar also immediately stopped putting any effort into them. In high school it kind of sucked because cliques were established by sophmore year so I think I spent around 3 years in a friend group of people who didn't give a fuck and I put all the effort into. Never since then though.
>>33443279
>work
>effort
Stop being a pedant anon

>>33443050 (OP)
>How do you deal
i don't. it is pointless.

if they are interesting enough i might check if there might be a reason for their behavior, but usually they are just malicious or retarded. some people are just incapable of breaking a message by point 1, point 2, point 3, etc then write some questions back, others do it so well they make you feel like youre the retard.

You get rid of them. Yes, as in killing them. They are human parasites, you're doing the world a favor.

>>33443050 (OP)
If you need to complain about needing to put in the effort into the relationship, you don't want to put the effort in eiter.

>>33443050 (OP)
>How do you deal with one sided friendships
Depends on friends.
Some of them I told, some of them I just ghosted. Not helps that I have tendency to forget people (object permanence issues with varius 3-4 letter abbrevations) and most of my friends also.
The main question is not even that, but that if you forced yourself to meet/tralk do you feelk better with them or not. If not, then why try, if yes, then it worth the effort.
>The moment you stop making an effort, everything stops.
Exactly. That's the Second Law of Thermodynamics, the Entropy. I hate that too, but it's physics that's just how the Universe works.

>>33443050 (OP)
leave, embrace autism. improve yourself.

>>33443050 (OP)
Sauce