Thread 33445536

My gf is a social butterfly but I'm a shut-in.

Makes me feel a bit insecure, never felt insecure about it before but considering she has people texting her 24/7 and I have no one, it makes me wonder if something is wrong with me and I'm living my life wrong.

Do you think this is an actual problem? Should I try to be more outgoing and friendly? I don't really know how.

>>33445536 (OP)
watch this video:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EyRxboAwzqU

Its obviously an exaggeration. But if you see signs of yourself in this guy, with being insecure.. seeking comfort from her to overcome your own insecurities, then you know this is a problem..

And I say this as someone who used to be afraid of going out and I only went out with my gf and when we were outside early in the relationship I was literally scared. until I got comfortable with being outside. And being with her outside. I know it sounds lame but dude Its fear. You HAVE to solve your own fear. GF can really help with fear but to really overcome it fully it has to come from you. Find friends. Find more options. See that there are other guys and beautiful girls out there other than her. It will make you an all around healthier person. Also realize that girls live this life. They don't live in computer screens, maybe in phone screens but they are always on the move, socializing, being outside. They are considerably less afraid than us. Trust me that whether you want it or not - your gf is out there in the world, interacting with men and women alike, and she knows she has options. When the scales are tipped too much - she will be the one with the upper hand. Don't do this mistake dude. Because when you lose her - you'll lose everything. And I lost my gf when she chose to cheat on me and I ended it a year ago. We were together for 5 years, lived together for 4. Don't fucking wait up. Wake up.

btw if you're wondering - my gf wasn't that much of a social butterfly, she was quite scared and indoors as me. But just slightly more outgoing than I am and less afraid in SOME regards.

>>33445536 (OP)
>My gf is a social butterfly but I'm a shut-in.
I won't read far-fetched threads posted by creative writers trying to pose a new scenario.

>>33445536 (OP)
>>33445667
This anon is right. You must learn to socialize for yourself. If/when she breaks up with you, you're going to be all alone. It happened to me and was suicide-inducing.

It's also not fair to her to carry 100% of your emotional weight. You need at least a friend or two you can confide in. At the minimum.

>>33445536 (OP)
OP don't listen to anyone else on here.

You might not be as social as her. There's nothing wrong with that. It could be an incompatibility long term but keep reading

You need to have your own circle of friends. Only need 2 friends minimum. Just some other guys to BS with, meet for a drink/coffee once in awhile. If its an activity/hiking friend thats great too.

If she ever leaves, yeah it will suck but you won't be at 0.

Also, develop a strong interest in something outside of work. Not video games

>>33445536 (OP)
dude you're living the dream. The reality is that she sees you as a refuge from the hustle & bustle of her social life. Lean into that. You could also just communicate with her and open up about your insecurities. I'm sure she'll tell you exactly what I said here, more or less.

Doesn't hurt to make an effort to be a bit more outgoing, but it's not a requirement and NOT what she's dating you for (or else she wouldn't be with you in the first place dumbass :))

>>33445536 (OP)
You can be different.

Do you want texts 24/7?

ahh yes, the life of an introvert who is attracted to assertive, extroverted women. It's heartening to know that others bear the same cross as I

>>33448532
>It's heartening to know that others bear the same cross as I
hahaha xDDD I love that. I wish I had a lady.