Thread 33448435

This meme from /r9k/ is dead accurate in one way. The following common questions on /adv/
>How do I get a GF?
>where do I meet women?
>what should I say to women?
>how to cold approach?
all reveal the same fact - the person asking the question is too inexperienced and isolated to even consider dating. Ask them questions and invariably IF they have ever had a friend it was 1-3 fellow outsiders that were forced together in middle school and they haven’t spoken to them since.
So the advice is this - if you have no friends & no social life you are nowhere close to being ready to date.
Work on your social life and make friends first.

>>33448435 (OP)
tf are you talking about
i've had plenty of pussy, but covid has made a lot of my social groups distant or damaged, and the gatherings we had prior to it have long since dissolved
>dead accurate
yeah, for a world that doesn't really exist anymore
a lot of things have gotten better over the past few years as far as gatherings and events, but it's still relatively difficult to find new friends or rebuild old ones, and even my most gregarious friends are having a tough time out there
learn to relate to people

>>33448435 (OP)
>Work on your social life and make friends first.
Okay. How?

>>33448435 (OP)
Nah. My brother is a combative misanthrope autist with no job who never leaves the house. My parents have complained to me that he's been sneaking (or blatantly letting in) girls for hookups regularly. He's 6'3 and not physically unattractive otherwise.
Opportunities for love, sex and relationships are almost entirely random. Your chances are bettered by being attractive, going out more and maybe even "maxxing" whatever, but you could do absolutely everything right and die alone, or absolutely everything wrong and have as much romance and penor touch as you want.

>>33448459
>nothing in OPs post relate to me at all
We all know

>>33448484
>my brother suffers from none of the issues in your post. I think mentioning this is interesting
Lol

>>33448482
Read the archive, this is thoroughly answered 5 times a day

>>33448435 (OP)
kind of meme advice to be honest

I've dated girls when I had no friends. Flirting with girls and having sex is the easy part.

The trick is when it becomes a longer term relationship and she wants you to come hang out with her friends and she wants to hang out with yours. Not every girl is going to be keen on dating someone long-term who has no social life. Especially if they're like 18 year olds.

but it's hardly the biggest obstacle that the average incel faces when dating girls.

and yeah having a social life does expand your potential dating pool even if there are no girls immediately within it, it can be the friend of a friend of a friend type of situation.

The biggest mistake that I think incels make is trying to mask way too hard as normies because they want to be chasing after the hottest most popular and most attractive hot blonde chick.

>>33448499
>just read all 33 million posts ever posted on this board bro

>>33448517
None of this addresses the root problem for an incel: undersocialization and overthinking

>>33448533
That's because they're unattractive. They are unattractive to the point that it would hurt the social status of anybody else to associate with them. So they are excluded.
Nothing can be done about this.

>>33448517
>none of the actual issues mentioned in OP apply to me
Why are you sommenting, then?

>>33448539
Seek therapy and stop doomscrolling

>>33448490
othering yourself for your own misery must be exhausting
consider that you're a normie that has had difficulty learning all of the normie things to be a functioning normie that is STILL capable of learning to eventually become one, instead of thinking of your friends as an entirely different species

>>33448435 (OP)
>standpoint epistemology means it's literally impossible for others who haven't gone through my struggles to relate or understand in any way

ironic that r9k went so far around the horseshoe it parrots gender studies now

still not correct, though

>>33448435 (OP)
>all reveal the same fact - the person asking the question is too inexperienced and isolated to even consider dating
Yeah no shit that's why every single incel thread gives the advice "you're not ready to date, you need to just make friends and establish a sense of belonging" and it never gets listened to by the OP

>>33448435 (OP)
I think a lot of people on this thread are missing the point.

Having friends is not a requirement for having a girlfriend or sex. But if you don’t have any friends, it is likely an indicator that you don’t know how to communicate with and relate to others. That indicates some psychological or emotional deficiency and those flaws are what make it more difficult to connect with women.

If you’re having trouble with women and it turns out that you also have no friends, the cause of these problems could be the same thing. It would then be easier to learn how to make friends first to address the issue of not being able to connect with other people. After that, getting to know girls should be a lot easier.

>>33448526
>doing internet searches is too haaaaaard
lol

>>33448533
It directly addresses it-
Deal with that first

>>33448752
The voices in your head aren’t real.
>>33448774
Your non-sequiturs and misunderstood/misused jargon make your look dumb, not smart

>>33448499
They all give the same useless shit

>>33448933
This, exactly.
The anons saying
>I don’t have friends but have GFs
are like a guy that socially drinks saying
>why are you telling raging alcoholics to stop drinking?! I had a beer last week and my life is fine!
The sorts of people that have jobs, social skills, etc. but lack friends right now do NOT make the threads we see everyday that start with
>im 27 years old, never had a job, never spoke to a woman other than my mom, have no hobbies, how do I get a GF next week?

>>33449070
No, you just refuse to do the work.

>>33448435 (OP)
this is true though, it wasn't until I started making friends with normies that I started gaining social skills myself. My normie friends all can approach women, all have a constant supply of gf's, etc.. And their social skills are starting to rub off on me. Like I am better at holding conversations, less anxious, more confident etc

OP is right, you have to learn to walk before you can run

>>33448539
there is some truth to this, even straight men prefer hanging out with handsome men because it makes them look cooler. Both men and women have been a lot nicer to me since I lost weight, got fit and started dressing nice

but, it doesn't take much to look normal. Just don't be fat and unkempt and you'll be fine

>>33449066
>Your non-sequiturs and misunderstood/misused jargon make your look dumb, not smart
You're literally arguing the same thing as feminists that say men shouldn't get to vote on abortion. Your values are so decadent and twisted your judgment on these issues isn't worth considering

>>33449241
>telling people they can change and succeed with effort is JUDT LIKE saying my body my choice
WTActualF are you smoking, you fucking retard?
The point is not
>Incels are incapable of grasping anything
it us
>you are making an error about what the actual problem is
Your combination of narcissism, poor education, and delusions of adequacy lead you to think an attempt to educate others is an attack.

>>33448435 (OP)
>>33448435 (OP)
I think about this manga page a lot.
There's a lot of pressure and urgency to try and make up for lost time and just speed-run relationships, platonic or romantic. But it just doesn't work that way.
Still struggling to get out of my own head and make some real, new friends.