Thread 33474708

My husband's been frustrated with how I forget to charge my phone, bc I've gone out to run errands and had it die on me and he'd call but not be able to reach me.

He asked me to start "checking in" with him every 2 hours when I go out, which he said was bc he wants to know I'm ok. I thought it was sweet he was concerned, and I was fine with it. But when I was shopping with a friend and I mentioned I needed to check in with my husband, she started asking if I was ok, and if he was being abusive and said that it's concerning he makes me do anything.

She scared me with that a little, so I skipped the next check in and about a half hour after it had passed my husband called to see where I was and what was going on and asking why I didn't text him. My friend felt like that was a big red flag, and she said that sounds like he's trying to ease me into being ok with his controlling habits by making them seem reasonable. She's been right about this kind of stuff before, so I feel like I should listen to her, but nothing about what has been going on here really bothered me in and of itself.

Is it really all that bad to do regular check ins for my husband, or is it leading up to more controlling sorts of behavior?

>>33474708 (OP)
this reads like a fake story written by a bored person with too much time.

he could be genuinely concerned or he could be a psychopath, we dont know him, you do

tits or gtfo

>>33474742
also this

>>33474708 (OP)
Tell to your husband that you really need some autonomy in your life and trust from your husband that tho we are apart he still always in my heart.

Distance in a spark plug is determines how big spark flame is . Being apart for a while ,make joy get together greater.

One can desire only what one don't have, with out distance there is no spark with out being apart there is no joy getting together.

So you have to adjust distance or time apart for comfy spark flame for both. Yeah very similar to a motor spark plugs . You have to be flexible according your need for autonomy and different fuels

>>33474833
great wisdom, are u chinese tho

>>33474708 (OP)
Your husband has a legitimate non-abusive reason so your friend should butt out.

Meanwhile one simple thing can solve the charging issue. NEVER leave your phone just lying around. When you are at home its "home" is a specific spot where it is plugged in. When you are in the car, it is not in your purse or pocket but someplace where it is plugged in

>>33474708 (OP)
Checking in is only an abusive behavior when associated with jealousy or other controlling behaviors. If he just wants to know you're alive and safe, that's fine and non-abusive. I don't know him, so you make that judgement

Start with charging your phone?
And tell him to check on you, not the other way around?

>>33474708 (OP)
>Is it really all that bad to do regular check ins for my husband, or is it leading up to more controlling sorts of behavior?
Remembering to charge your phone is a good thing, and it is frustrating if you can't reach someone when you need to. But expecting regular check ins like this strikes me as very odd. Your friend is right to be worried. You definitely shouldn't be okay with that.

>>33474708 (OP)
FFS, stop with the LARP, ok?

>>33474708 (OP)
He's probably not abusive just concerned, so you should offer to address battery issue by getting some app that reminds you to charge, use convenient fast chargers and have them everywhere, then tell him you appreciate his concern but it'll be better for your relationship to have more autonomy.

Your friend should fuck off. My wife and I both track each other's location in real time, useful if a phone is lost or stolen or if things go south. It's not controlling, you're a team and it's his job in particular to keep you safe. Don't waste your time "checking in" that's gay, just keep your phone charged and set it up so you can see each other's locations.