Thread 33630829

Should I ever tell my gf about my former frustrations about being incel? Are women empathetic enough to understand that shit?

I met her when I was 27 and she is 29. She is my first gf ever.

>>33630829 (OP)
No they aren’t

>>33630829 (OP)
Some things you should take to your grave

>>33630829 (OP)
Hard no buddy. Tell that to a guy friend; don't expect women to be sympathetic for that at all.

>>33630886
So love isn't real and women are bullshitting when they ask you to open up?

>>33630831
where did u meet

>>33630829 (OP)
I don't know if your girlfriend is empathetic, you know her better than me.

The problem is different: it might make her less ATTRACTED to you. Women's sexual attraction is based on power and dominance, abundance, etc. It will probably harm her attraction if you don't act like Mr. Dominant Male.

However, if she's very unique (a social reject, autist, etc), sharing your social struggles might make her more connected to you and relate to each other better. But only if she's unique (ie, neurodivergent). If she's a common normie, forget it, don't try that. Just act like you were busy or brooding, don't tell her you were unwanted.

>>33630829 (OP)
Are you still frustrated about having been an incel? I would have assumed having a gf would level you out mentally.

>>33630891
Women like their fantasy or ideal of you more than they like YOU yourself

>>33630829 (OP)
Depends on the woman. If she can put herself in a man's shoes, then yeah. Otherwise, prolly not.

>>33630829 (OP)
>Are women empathetic enough to understand that shit?
never fucking do this unless you want to dry her up. Women DO NOT sympathize when men's struggles. They will just laugh at you when you talk about your weaknesses with her- then she will feel disgusted.
>Should I ever tell my gf about my former frustrations about being incel?
no nigga. Is this a romance movie? Are you a secret faggot homosexual? Do you also want to tell her your desires to watch and cry in the corner of the bedroom as Tyrone digs her insides out? Keep it cool dummy

never tell a women your mental/emotionals
on a need to know basis

>>33630927
Even though I fuck her every night, I can't make up for the mental damage that being sexless since I was 12 has done to my psyche.

>>33630899
>But only if she's unique (ie, neurodivergent). If she's a common normie
Not true, even neurodivergent women despise weak men.

>>33630829 (OP)
No, women have zero empathy despite yapping about it endlessly. Telling her that will make her no longer attracted to you. Hypergamy is the default state of women

>>33630891
I've been doing research and a lot of the concepts behind love is a lot different now than they were more than 100 years ago. A lot of unions were pragmatic or platonic. Just two people filling rigid roles and knowing their place within it.
Even though we all hype up romanticism, there's a 'lizard brain' aspect to it that we simply cannot get rid of unless you are incredibly self-aware (so basically almost no women).

Like other anons said, you always have to present a confident figure. The best you can do is hint at an issue but ALWAYS affirm you have it under control. If you want to truly let it out, talk to your mom, your best mate, or a therapist.

>>33630829 (OP)
The best part here is you're too stupid to see how completely unempathetic you're being.

Firstly, you're treating all women as a monolith, which shows how completely clueless you are, and then you're confused if any woman can have empathy because you don't have the empathy to achieve even the most basic understanding of women.

Congrats, you're a punchline, and you don't possess the introspective capacity to understand it.

>>33631949
>A lot of unions were pragmatic or platonic. Just two people filling rigid roles and knowing their place within it.

Well put. If incels think that modern societies treat them as idiots, they should tell their ideas abotu marriage to an Inn full of boozed up 18th century peasants. Marriage has fuck all to do with love, that was never its purpose or intention. Modern ideas of marriage are in fact a perverse inversion of its actual socioeconomic purposes, which is why the divorce rate is as sky high as it is. Romantic Relationships between men and women aren't made to work by chaining yourself together through a contract.

>Like other anons said, you always have to present a confident figure. The best you can do is hint at an issue but ALWAYS affirm you have it under control. If you want to truly let it out, talk to your mom, your best mate, or a therapist.

Well, there is an addition: You can also be confident in your past and in your failures and mistakes. However I agree that it should always be presented as resolved, since no one wants to get swamped in their partners issues, dumping your garbage on your partner is not what a relationship is for.

are moids empathetic enough to understand why assault is bad?

all moids hate all women and they always have. yet moids act shocked that women dont love them lmfao

>>33630829 (OP)
if she isnt empathetic enough is she really even worth your time

>>33630829 (OP)
No. No. Empathy is for women and children and women hate other women the most.
>>33630891
Yes. It is a shit test. The only bad option in response to "opening up" is being honest.

>>33630829 (OP)
>Should I ever tell my gf
if anything ever starts like this then NO
>former frustrations
definitely not unless you're 'coming out' as an incel
>Are women empathetic
NO
>to understand
>>33630899
you're really throwing him into the fire with that neurodivergent shit
she might be an autist, but she's still a woman
neurodivergent women are way more of a headfuck because you then have a literal babysitting childrearing aspect of navigating an autist sperging out and being a literal retard combined with them already being retarded by being a woman, they'll be extra self entitled because muh retard diagnosis and also extra dense and lacking of understanding their own feelings
terrible advice
>>33631127
amen
>>33631612
sounds like you psyopd yourself pretty hard
treat yourself as a psyop survivor
you're in recovery for being psyopd into the mental self inflicted anguish of having made an association unnecesarily strong
maybe things aren't as they seem, the sexlessness and the problems that arose are a symptom of something else
also being mentally ill and then taking that to your other half, basically fucking destroys the relationship every time, that's what professionals are for

>>33630829 (OP)
I think it depends on the details:
Do you want to say "I was lonely and angry all the time", then maybe. It's okay to talk about frustrations.

Do you want to say "i thought that all women are whores, subhumans, (insert incel buzzwords here), jews are responsible for bbc porn and all non-white men need to be killed because their women should get the bwc" then bottle that shit the fuck up and never mention it to anyone ever again. Shit like "manosphere" or "sigma male" is the reddest of all red flags.

>>33630829 (OP)
>are women empathetic
no. absolutely not. women do not see men as human beings.

>>33630891
CORRECT. even if a woman says that, unconsciously she still might betray you. even if there are women that won't betray you, there are still so few of them that we cannot base our behavior on that small a demographic

>>33630829 (OP)
No

yes, but make sure that the story is basically a long form compliment to her rather than just a rant about how much of an unfuckable retard you were.

>>33630829 (OP)
Youre no longer an incel, why ask advice from people who still are?

>>33630829 (OP)
no you shouldn’t do it op
the whole concept of an underdog story who overcame adversity and got to the top
women don’t care about any of that
they really only want the best they can get and they don’t really give a shit if you had to work to get to the place where you are or you were just born into it
really only men care about any of that struggle and grind

as for
>should I open up and tell the truth
this is basically just a meme litmus test
you pass it by pretending you were always perfect
if you show you used to have an insecurity she’ll immediately ask herself if these insecurities and flaws can crawl back out

>>33630829 (OP)
No. My gf found out around the 2-month benchmark, and it was beyond a hassle. Had to go full damage control and explain how I shitpost about it and don't fully believe in it.
>Well anon what do you mean, "you fully don't believe in it".
Then I had to explain so much shit that she still doesn't get and will bring up. To this DAY 6 months after the fact, she will still talk about how "seeing incel stuff online has changed her viewpoint on things". Not in a good way either, went down the YouTube video essay slope pipeline of evil inceldom videos being exposed.

>>33630891
>Love real
It is I would hope
>bullshitting when they ask you to open up
Yes. You need to thread very carefully. Some women will understand (ie she went through similar troubles, etc.) Some won't at all and you just ruined the relationship.

>>33630829 (OP)
Sure, if you want her to completely change the way she looks at you and think you're a reformed loser.

>>33630829 (OP)
How N****s Become Incels
https://youtu.be/8xflOFNRD_E?si=WliboHGehFUbYjLf

>>33630891
Yes

>>33630829 (OP)
if you're actually serious about her, you're gonna have to admit it eventually. my advice is try to pull as authentically as possible because eventually the mask slips. And if she catches a fleeting glimpse of it you're done for.

How can anyone be romantically attracted to women knowing all this?

>>33637129
for me it's societal expectations. but i'm an incel so im sure my illusion will shatter the moment i actually get a gf.

>>33630829 (OP)
Why would you even bother telling her this? All its going to do is tank the relationship fast as fuck.

>hey so i used to be a MAJOR FUCKING LOSER who hated women and was a total fuck up
>yeah then you met me and we started dating
>haha yeah no one wanted me, isnt that great? i have no dating experience either at 30 even though you've probably been dating since you were 14
>hey, you get to relive the problems boys had when you were both 14, but this time with adult problems on top of it!

Literally nothing good will come of it. Play it off as much as you can that it was self improvement and that you were mass rejected for women for nearly 2 decades.