Thread 33908016

So I used to be addicted to porn and I've always had weird fantasies but porn created worse ones like me fantasizing about my mom. The guilt made me quit porn and masturbation

But sometimes I think, what if that's just who I am? I will deny my degeneracy as I don't want to cause pain and disgust onto other people but it makes me sad to think that this is just my nature. Who is the real me? Me right now or when I was indulging in my fantasies?

>>33908016 (OP)
Similar situation to yours, except the game was even more rigged for me. Was infatuated with aunt's feet ever since I was a toddler and discovered jerking off on my own at the age of 6... Yeah and you can imagine where that led. So all that was before even watching porn. But oddly enough my brain is kinda wired in a way that im a tough crowd so porn wasnt too interesting to me so i didnt really beat my dick until it fell off, its just that my incest fantasies were really critical.

Things were kinda in control until some stuff happened with my mom when I was 16 that im not gonna clog this post with but yeah that was a death certificate for my soul. At least i have a gf now but the amount of times i've cheated on her in my mind with my mom, cousin and whatnot is definitely sickening. Im firing myself up for a round of nofap these days, i pray i manage it. Good luck to you too.

>>33908112
I'm sorry Anon, do you think your attraction to your aunt's feet was caused by something specific or were you born with it?

I'm glad you have a girlfriend now, I couldn't keep one due to my lack of arousal as I'm pretty much only attracted to the ''mom scenario'' in porn. I will pray for you, I have hope you will push through

I've been addicted to various types of degenerate porn since I was a kid. Bestiality is probably the worst of it. Lately I've been trying to just jerk off without even fantasizing (just focusing on the physical sensations) and it is maybe helping to fix my mind but it'll probably take a long time.

>>33908136
I was definitely born with it. I remember being like 4 years old and staring at my aunts feet like they are a mermaid song in a physical form and I couldn't comprehend why I couldn't take my eyes off of them.

>I'm glad you have a girlfriend now, I couldn't keep one due to my lack of arousal as I'm pretty much only attracted to the ''mom scenario'' in porn. I will pray for you

Ah shit that's bad. Ironically I am the one thats always horny and pushy in our relationship so im lucky there. If I suffered from ED that would definitely motivate me harder to nofap. Go get it

>>33908184
I guess I'm also wrestling with my faith in a way. I believe in God but I think to myself from time to time: if I stopped believing in God, would I go back to porn?

That question keeps me awake at night sometimes, like, if I stopped believing in objective morality, good and evil etc. And instead I thought of it as something more subjective, would I use that ''freedom'' to indulge in my twisted fantasies?

>>33908213
I know i would definitely indulge in it freely if i didnt believe. One thing I would definitely also do is go around and fuck a bunch of hoes thats for sure.

>>33908245
What made you believe in God?

>>33908280
Born and raised that way, then got my instilled belief cemented by further research

>>33908016 (OP)
This is not real you. This is moreso the twisted side of you that was developed via porn addiction and various unhealthy fantasies. You're certainly not the only person in this situation for sure, but that doesn't mean you have to accept this within yourself. Everybody has a weakness, the point of battling it is to improve yourself. Just like you can't drive a car with a broken tire, the same you can't go on with your life without making some changes. Makes some adjustement to your life such as not watching porn, staying clear of those thoughts, avoiding temptation, praying to God. I wish you and the other anons in simmilar situation luck, you can get through this, don't let lust control you, this is not who you are meant to be.