Thread 33908964

How do I stop wanting to kill myself for starting late?

starting what late

>>33908964 (OP)

You lock in & you start changing. I wasted my childhood playing videogames, staying indoors, & always being too afraid to do anything in life.

It was when I started my senior year of college that I realized that I have been missing out so much in life, and that I wasted so much of it doing jack shit. The thing that made me realize this was... stay with me... a troon in one of my cs classes. He was so fucking weak, shy, smelly, and scared to do anything. He woke me up, and I said to myself that I never want to end up like him in my life.

So I did a 180 in my life, and started changing. I started hitting the gym 5 days in a week, started saying yes to more opportunities, went out to more parties, shot my shot with more girls, etc. In return, within 6 months, I was able to not only get fit, date a couple of girls, be more happy, and attend more social gatherings.

The truth is that you just gotta act like today is your last day on this earth, and just... have fun. Be confident, curious, and an all around fun guy.

>>33908964 (OP)
Knowing that you can start early and still have trickery cast upon you that holds your hair length back.

You only start late after you're dead.

Go get a life bro. Today's early enough.

>>33909122
>videogames
However video games are fun in a world devoid of meaning

>>33908964 (OP)
I think this is the point where long hair stops being attractive and starts being gross. I think the longer the better until you get to the middle of the back and after that it starts to become kind of gross. When the hair is that far away from the face/head it's kind of unpleasant. Not to mention poor shower drains, a lot of shedding, all the maintenance, etc. Yuck.

>>33908964 (OP)
Damn OP posts something totally vague, leaving everyone confused and wondering what you meant, and then just posts a woman cooking. But of course, this is all part of your plan to get attention from others, to have them orbit you like satellites so you can feel important, you stupid bastard faggot

>>33908964 (OP)
You've lived through several "once in a generation" market crashes and we're looking at another. There is no "starting late" anymore, anon. We're all flying blind here.

>>33909452
You are a homosexual

>>33909452
I've had long hair since I was teenager. Once it goes past tailbone then it starts dragging on the floor when bend over or sit down, or it can get hang down into the toilet.
>>33908964 (OP)
A bit of a loaded question don't you think?

>>33909436
A lot of people brag about quitting video games because the easiest, lowest effort thing you can do to "self-improve." I feel bad for people who are trying to impress imaginary people on the Internet. As with anything, video games are only an issue when it becomes too much and they start taking priority over more important things.

>>33909122
>started saying yes to more opportunities, went out to more parties

I hate this kind of advice so much because it rests on the stupid assumption that people that are trying to fix their social life even GET opportunities to do stuff like go to parties and such. I've only been to two parties in my entire life, one was in high school where one of the "cool" guys (to be fair he genuinely was pretty cool and a really nice dude) invited me to one because he felt sorry for me and one was in college where one of my childhood friends invited me to her birthday party because, as I later found out after it was too late and she got a boyfriend, she had a crush on me. At least give some actual advice on how to get invited to parties FFS.

>>33908964 (OP)
Speaking from personal experience, you don't stop wanting to, you just keep the voices at bay while you make progress and hope that at some point you reach a point where you have enough things to be happy about that life feels worth living.
The unfortunate math is that ending means a 0% chance to improve but living means a higher than 0% chance to improve. It's optimal to take any amount higher than 0 no matter how small.

>>33908964 (OP)
The world is unforgiving, and much of what happens to us is caused by people around us. We can't act on it until we become aware and are free to take decisions. Usually those decisions are to flee or endure to take hits.

But now that you are aware, you are at the starting line. Nothing up to this day has been your life, but now that you question it, you're finally living it, your choices are now fully yours and you can decide to act.

Maybe you don't have the tools right now, but you know you need them, you need to choose how to build them or get them. You have zero when others have much, but now you start building.

It's true. There are winners and losers. You were not destined to have the most beautiful genetically optimal woman, or a life without suffering. What you do have is the knowledge of why those things matter, what the things you lacked were and what needed to happen to get there. And most importantly, the choice of what to do with those.

Does any of it matter? No. Suffering is not a badge or a life calling. However someone must take the fall so the next try is perfected. Such is the law of nature, and you wouldn't have the vision you enjoy so much if some flatworm didn't get eaten. You wouldn't tell what tastes good or tastes bad if some lizard hadn't died young over enjoying poisonous food. You wouldn't be able to think and question the world if all the people who lived the day hadn't gotten killed by those who could. And thus we who lose now are able to tell our loved ones what's needed to not suffer in modern times. We take the fall, we receive the blows. We're the forlorn hope of life. You're dying. You choose what to do with the -ing part.

>>33911489
How to get invited to parties.
First, your self and your context.

>What do I like
>What places that have people in them do I feel good being at
>Am I capable of communicating to people what I like
>Am I capable of building trust, either by being extroverted and charismatic, or by investing time consistently in a chosen few?

Second, the people
>Wherever you are, talk to people that draw you in
>A good chunk of people can't meet you. They're cowards who only respond to people they're familiar to them, some dislike you for things that can only be understood in their mind. Leave them and talk to someone else.
>Be genuinely interested in them. Easier said than done and needs both work on the way you measure others and finding people that match your likes
>Invest time consistently with them
>Tell them "man, I want to go to a party, let me know if there's any"
>Say this to fucking everyone dammit.
>???
>profit

>>33909452
As someone with very long hair I do agree. It may look nice but it's not practical in the slightest. I wouldn't recommend it if you value practicality in any way.

>>33909527
Possibly another one.

>>33909452
>>33912172
My hair is shoulder lenght and already gross. I am a man though.

>>33909452
>>33912172
>>33912242
Girl's hair to the sacrum is hot as fuck. Hair becomes gross because the oils can't reach all the way down there. If your head isn't very oily in the first place any length of hair will look gross and disorderly.

Men's hair up to shoulder length looks good (to other men). Something like Aragorn/Algren is the limit of good looking. Also the fact that there aren't any other styles than Aragorn/Snape for that length makes it almost never look good anyway.

t. had shoulder blade length hair, did it in a ponytail in public, but realized only literal troons wore ponytails, then testosterone kicked in and started shedding like mad (and still sheds anyway).

I really wanted to donate hair for virtue signal as a self imposed challenge, I grew it out during pandemic, and to me it symbolized I stood at home and protected my family. I had to get a job later and the niggers made me cut it, then grew it back as a NEET but age caught up.

Enjoy your hair anons. Enjoy your youth.

>>33908964 (OP)
you don't but celebrate each goal you accomplish and when you "make it", you can have pride in the fact you did so in spite of fucking up as a young adult

>>33913091
Also I will say masks, conditioner and treatments are cope, they only last the day you use them. You have godly hair or you don't. It's best to style according to your hair type and face. Wish stylists actually gave a shit about it.

>>33912063
I have questions.

>>33909452
Gay.

>>33909122
nah, i'd rather beat the living shit out of people like you for even smiling at me

>>33911489
i have a pet theory of social nexuses where there are just some people out there who attract fun and social success wildly and are not at all afraid to share it. i was lucky enough to meet one of these people early on in college and the rest came so fucking easily as a result, but the only way you can reliably meet these people is by meeting a /lot/ of people.
>>33912063
this is really solid advice, especially the second part.

>>33912063
>>What do I like
>>What places that have people in them do I feel good being at
There are no third space areas to do this.

>>33908964 (OP)
i don't need no hoe to cook for me. i'm fuckin' gay

>>33917834
If that's how you wanna cope then fine by me!

>>33917834
Then you need a femboy or what?

>>33912063
>>Am I capable of communicating to people what I like
>>Am I capable of building trust, either by being extroverted and charismatic,
>>or by investing time consistently in a chosen few?

Anon, if you’re still around, do you have advice for working on these?

>>33908964 (OP)
There's not really a late for a man, there's an abnormal and unideal but there's always been odd outliers throughout history

>>33912063
>Be genuinely interested in them
did that. Doesnt automatically mean your interest means anything to them
>Invest time consistently with them
they will hate you for that and find you annoying/clingy
>Tell them "man, I want to go to a party, let me know if there's any"
"uuuuh... yeah sure anon...."
>Say this to fucking everyone dammit.
yes come off as a loser
>???
>profit
oh so youre full of shit

The advice you just gave is just normal behavior that EVERYONE does or tries at some point. Its like telling incels who want a gf to just talk to girls. Its like telling people to just walk if they want to get somewhere. Your post literally means nothing. Your advice only has value to people who never tried, not those who were rejected. Youre just a normie who re-discovered absolutely basic behavior and thinks it MUST work for everyone else. You didnt build your success, you just put in the bare minimum effort to pick it up off the ground.

>>33918678
>Doesn't automatically mean your interest means anything to them
That's why I tell you, some people can't meet you. Move on, talk to someone else.

>Clingy
The point of the advice is, if you don't show up, people will never let down the barrier for strangers. However you treat it as all or nothing and take it to the other extreme. You're only calling yourself clingy without showing up once, and even if people did think you're clingy that only means they're not the ones that are capable of meeting you. Stop going after people like this, what are you even pursuing them for?

>"uuuh yeah sure anon"
People can't mind read you unless you say what you need out of them. Yes, you won't match everyone, most even. The only guaranteed way for that not happening is if you avoid it because predicting nobody out of 1000 people will invite you feels safer to you.

>yes come off as a loser
You are one already. You can't change being a loser. Even losers have a role in life, that is to die trying. We are what we are because we're sitting on a pile of dead losers. When you're a loser and you reject being a loser, you become nothing.

>>33918869
these ideal people that youre describing simply dont exist for some of us

>>33918871
your advice basically boils down to "nevah give up dood!"

>>33918874
>>33918871
So, Have you found your answer then?

"Truly putting in the effort is beyond me. I will never be invited to a party."

From this answer more questions arise.
>What was it that made it impossible for me to even talk to someone
>What exactly made me not want to try
>What was I looking for in a party in the first place
>What am I going to do with the answers to these questions?
>If that's really beyond me, how would I rather live?
>If living for others didn't work, when am I going to start living for myself?

>>33908964 (OP)
be kind to yourself, i guess.
i went through a depressive funk where the only thing i would do was eat shitty protein shakes and lift at the gym as a "productive" form of self-harm but after a while i got a lot stronger without realizing it.
then i switched over to running because i couldn't get up a flight of stairs without getting winded and realized that progress was a lot more deliberate there. i couldn't just go full send for a mile and expect to see results. i barely ran a 14-minute mile before my heart rate hit 170 bpm and was getting passed up by geriatrics. it stung to look out my window and see people who'd probably been running for years moving so quickly and apparently so freely.
seriously thought about quitting or abandoning the program i was on in favor of something softer like treadmill shit, but i decided that i was going to stick with it regardless of how embarrassing it would be.
things got steadily better and i would have regular little victories that kept me motivated. the achievement of running in the snow made me feel like a warrior. i'm still getting better, but only because i stuck with it.
socializing was also sort of like that. i shut myself away for a few years and had to start from zero. i would hang out with people and see the friendships they'd cultivated over the past 4-5 years and compare myself to that constantly, but the real success came when i stopped doing that and started socializing for its own sake. i got out of my head.
meet yourself where you're at and you'll be fine nonny.

>>33908964 (OP)
Start earlier, you big silly goose

>>33918923
cute strawman. I never said effort is useless, Im just saying your advice doesnt apply to others. Your advice is shit. That doesnt mean ALL advice is shit.

>>33917921
nah. not a femboy. a large hairy man with a beard and lots of body hair everywhere. naked so i can admire his hairy ass. preferably a huge hairy dick and balls i can see even from behind when he opens his legs a bit. i don't give a shit if his beard hair or body hair gets in the food i just love all that sheer masculinity cooking shit for me. and i'm 100% serious by the way. if you're a straight guy you wouldn't understand

>>33919505
Okay I'm bisexual but I literally gagged at that description of yours. Not sure if it's because of how young I am (I'm 21) and guys my age usually don't have those features but that sounds fucking disgusting to me and not sexy at all.

>>33919988
I'm straight but I can tell you're not a real lover.
The fat gay bear is a ground floor romantic who wants to fuck his man and even just watching him cook turns him on. That's lovely
Ask your femboy BF to stop shaving for 2 weeks and see if he still gets you hard. Twink death is real, learn to love your lover's face, even when they start adding on wrinkles and his hair starts thinning. That's life.

>>33920028
You do realize there is a middle ground between a femboy and what
>>33919505
just described, right? It doesn't have to be either look like a woman or be super hairy everywhere hair getting in the food etc. There has to be a middle ground somewhere. Most men in general are a middle ground between the two.