WARNING!!! UNSCHEDULED OFFBOARD ACTIVATION!!!

OPEN THE IRIS.

>>937147517 (OP)
GOOLD?

>the incongruity between offworld dialing opening the gate instantly and incoming wormholes making the gate spin up

>>937147520
Your iris sir?

>>937147517 (OP)
Stargate is gay and stupid and major carter was never hot

>>937147520
Off world they always have the original dialing device.
We slapped together our own, so we need to spin it.
In some episodes where the gate dualing device is fucked up, the team has to manually spin the chevrons and input them.

I hope Stargate stays dead and doesn't get brought back as a walking corpse like Star Trek and Star Wars.

>>937147519

>>937147522
>major carter was never hot

>>937147517 (OP)
The movie was better than the tv show.

The last two seasons retreading the Goa'uld storyline of 'advanced aliens pretending to be gods' was so lame but the 200th episode was fantastic.

>>937147528
How's the reboot trilogy coming along, Roland? Cancelled? Never happening? Too bad.

>>937147519

>>937147529
Are you talking about Atlantis or Universe?
It was so long ago, but I remember Universe being utter shit but Atlantis was nice.

>>937147532
He's talking about the Ori

>>937147532
What? I'm talking about SG-1. I heard Universe started off awful but was improving until it got canceled which sucks but is understandable, not every show can start off bad and then given leeway to become good.

>>937147533
>>937147534
Ah makes sense.
I watched this shit in middle school.

>>937147526
sexo

>>937147522
It's gay and stupid but also fun as hell
I prefer Fraiser too

>>937147531

>>937147534
Pretty much this, they started introducing more locations, planets and implied civilizations. Then right before they were about to drop the meaty good stuff they got cancelled. But yeah, it started off shit.

>>937147538
Shol'va!

>>937147540
That particular word would make a good drinking game until the start of season 3 at the very least
That's how far along I am

>>937147523
Yeah, literally explained early on that they daisy-chained all of the best supercomputers the USAF has access to and its like 15% the power of a true DHD

>>937147529
>>937147533
Yeah, honestly i think they killed off anubis and realised they had already been contracted for another couple seasons

Ben Browder and Claudia Black reunion was lovely though, love me some farscape

>>937147520
shut up it looks cool

>>937147543
>realised they had already been contracted
Stargate was cancelled, which is why they had to wrap up the major plot points of the Ori and Ba'al's Clones in made for TV movies. If they were just filling time until their contract was over they would've plotted it to end neatly in the seasons they had left.

I sound like a faggot. But i like how humanity in the show gets stronger as seasons go on.

>tfw no stargate 4 player co-op fps

This shit could be the next vermintide i'm sure of it. For classes you could have Marine, combat scientist, rebel jaffa, tok'ra and many more

>>937147547
That would be cool

>>937147520
never bothered me, meanwhile
>LED gate
>space gate, dial wrong address and die
Who thought this retarded shit made sense
The SGU gate is kino tho
>low tech version
>need to spin the entire thing
>instead of a specific part

>>937147549
Because SGU had stargates added in after production had already started

Started off as a completely original IP then somewhere along the way they slapped the stargate franchise on it

>it's a Teal'c fucks a white woman episode

>Anubis dies
>Show becomes Fargate
At least Atlantis was good.

>its a replicator episode
boring

>>937147546
They really don't though. 90% of Earth's safety is because the Asgard put it in the Protected Planet's Treaty. Their ships don't even get energy weapons until the Asgard give them away before suiciding.

The human race survives because the same four quipping jackasses keep stumbling into saving the day.

>>937147517 (OP)
>picrel comes out the portal
>gate's locked, can't be powered down and more are coming
>you can't outrun them

what now

They don't make comfy sci-fi like this any more.

>>937147555
h-hope it has a taste for cock

>>937147556
Daniel really nailing that "nerd trying to look badass" pose

>>937147555
Replicators are worse, IMO.

>>937147529
I wouldn't have even given a fuck but did they really have to give the foot solders staff weapons AGAIN.

>>937147560
>metal and chainmail armor
>staff weapons to kill
>little sidearms to stun
Am I describing the Jaffa or the Ori soldiers?

>>937147520
offworld dialing without a DHD definitely makes the ring spin but after a few seasons they just don't bother with inserting the same stock shot that shows the spinning every single time.
also the gate prop broke down regularly and couldn't spin most of the time, hence later models having no moving parts

IN THE NAME OF THE GODS SHIPS SHALL BE BUILT TO CARRY OUR WARRIORS OUT AMONGST THE STARS AND WE WILL SPREAD ORIGIN TO ALL THE UNBELIEVERS.

mystery nigga

>>937147562
Personally I liked how super wobbly the chevrons were every time you got a closeup, was it really that hard to make a prop that just... doesn't?

>>937147555
I'd be scared of the powerful entity that could dress xenomorphs as maids and use them as fucktoys.

>>937147555
Get them to clean my ship.
>But they ask for room to lay their eggs.
Look, if it means my sanitation crew can focus on cleaning the lavatory which hasn't been done in months those aliens can lay eggs on my the cruise missles for all I care.

Why hasn't there been a Stargate game yet? Could easily retheme XCOM's gameplay for it

>>937147564
literally me

>>937147568
There have been several

>>937147523

>>937147568
Literally all we need is just an XCOM 2 modpack to overhaul it.

Who was your favorite side character? Ba'al was always based

>>937147564
>i am anonymous, i do not forgive and i do not forgot

>>937147551
I honestly don't rememver any

There was that one where he was bit by a bug and slowly mutating while a loli cares for him after he ran away from base but mostly he was faithful to his hot ebony wife

>>937147570
I don't believe you

>>937147526
A nanobot swarm wanted to tap that btw

>>937147517 (OP)
the only good stargate game would be a fps game where you do all your missions thru the stargate
like destiny 2 or disgea
preferably not live service
fuck it would be so fun if done well lol

Is this the most cursed franchise in the history of TV?

>>937147528
yeah it was but the tv show is a 9.5/10 lol
atlantis was good too till like season 3 or 4
universe or w/e it is is trash
the later seasons of sg1 are trash too
like season 8 onward

>>937147549
>space gate, dial wrong address and die
in-universe reason was the Ancients wanting to keep certain human worlds isolated since the Milky Way had been wiped by a plague.

actual reason is that it was much much cheaper to use full CGI than setting up a location gate prop, or even inserting a CGI gate in the background of a location shot.

>>937147576
litterally every episode teal'c's actor was the writer/director for lmao
even that broad from enterprise

>>937147580
ahem

>>937147576
there is 0 woke in sg1 except for that 1 episode about mongols and gender shit
and it wasnt even that bad lol

>>937147579
fps with squad commands like brothers in arms road to hill 30 or x-com

>>937147585
In like 2 or 3 episodes after that one its the caveman virus episode where Daniel Jackson justifies rape lmao and later becomes the alpha Unga Bunga

>>937147545
The seventh season SG-1 was supposed to be the last and the outpost in Antartica was supposed to be Atlantis, but then they got an eight season and Atlantis was moved to a different galaxy. With the Ori storyline they did expect to get an 11th season, but the channel unexpectedly cancelled. Same with Atlantis, it was supposed to get a sixth season but was cancelled unexpectedly after the fifth.

>>937147519
andt what of good solonius?

>>937147578
id pump her full of my nanobots, if you catch my drift

>>937147575
>video game episode
>comes out in 2004, the same year as Doom 3
>game is about on par with Doom 3 graphically, just brighter
I would have played the shit out of that if it was real, even if it's just the episode scenario over and over again with RNG elements.

>>937147592
it was supposed to be real

>>937147585
That episode was written by the same woman that wrote that awful Tasha Yar episode in the first season of TNG

>>937147593
dev company produced a shit product and the parent company canceled it

>>937147565
SG-1 had a shoestring budget compared to Star Trek, and they had to rebuild the gate prop on that budget since the movie one was unusable.
even if the whole Stargate concept allowed for cheaper episodes, the Stargate design itself was very expensive. showing one person getting through the gate cost them $5,000 in CGI, and setting up an in-location gate prop could eat up most of the in-location budget. so over time they developed all kind of tricks to reduce the actual screentime of the activated Stargate prop to a bare minimum.

>>937147594
>same writer
>same plot
Did nobody on the production team notice this? It's pretty glaring since they're both first season episodes.

>>937147577
https://store.steampowered.com/app/1523650/Stargate_Timekeepers/

>>937147580
had a pretty decent run and ended when it needed to even when they were unnecessarily stretching it thin. only thing cursed about stargate is that it cannot get a single video game title to become a thing, the games are always either cancelled or released half-baked.

>>937147600
There was this huge, overambitous MMO that was actually in active dev

Like most huge, overambitous MMOs it died after just 6 months of development mismanagement

It would've been fun

I just finished TNG.

How is Farscape and DS9? What about SG-1?

someone made a natural selection map of sg-1. the marines started in the sgc and through the stargate where aliens started was a big pyramid

>>937147603
SG-1 or Babylon 5
both are great

>closest thing we get to a Stargate strategy game is a mod by autistic Germans for an old Star Wars RTS
https://www.moddb.com/mods/stargate-empire-at-war

>>937147601
>>937147602
everyone wanted a piece of the world of warcraft pie

>>937147603
farscape is great

>>937147600
>ended when it needed to
It was taken out from under them when they wanted to at least wrap up what they had. And even then both Ark of Truth and Continuum really stretched it as thin as it would go without slipping into parody.

>>937147603
>Farscape
this series is not comfy

>>937147603
Farscape is goated, it was the edgy sci fi show of the time with lots of sex and bloody violence, all while they guy who made the muppets does the sfx

>>937147541
>its a Chronos episode
>blackout drunk before the third act

>>937147610
why do you say that?

>>937147601
yeah, i remember seeing boxes of that stargate MMO on shelves for pre-order.

>>937147614
>>937147601
It's immortalised by being eternally advertised on the Season 10 DVDs

>>937147576
>ebony

>>937147613
>hey, should we implant the device which releases the mind control chemicals in the brain or under the skin?
>nah get the eye-yanker more fun that way

>>937147608
Damn, I watched season 1 in 2023 and didn't notice her being so milfy. A supernova making her horny was fun though.

>>937147599
I didn't expect much but... wow.

>that Origins shitshow that had even worse effects than the first season of SG1
Why

>>937147619

>>937147580
Nah, it ended before they could make it lame and gay. Sure, there was an attempt with SGU and that weird miniseries no one gives a fuck about but I'm glad it's dead and buried instead of a shambling corpse like Star Trek.

>>937147616
Yes

This one, honestly just around to re-watching and forgot this spicy negress died

>>937147622

>>937147619
As I said earlier, the 200th episode was pure kino

>>937147626

This is a good thread thanks lads

XTREM Wormhole > SG1

I was fascinated with this woman when I was a kid

>>937147603
DS9 is unironically the best Trek has to offer.

>>937147608
So sad she wore so much of that blue paint she became allergic and couldn't do it anymore.

Was very nice when she came back for the movie though

>this is our sexy femme fatale character
...grim

>>937147627
that first shot of the gate being winched up is reused from a S6 episode though. where they already made a meta-joke about how using a winch made the moment far less epic than the similar scene in the movie.

>>937147634
Look, she's trying her best with her jewy horse face.

>>937147634
she cute

>>937147518
JAFFA TONGUE MY CHAPPA'AI

>>937147634
Claudia black sadly hit the wall hard

She's a 9/10 just 5 or 6 years before this

Ayy better stay on it's side of the gate, I'm fucking everything that flies, steps, or slitters out, I'm cumming inside of it.

>>937147555
Nah, you don't understand, it can't outrun me.

>>937147529
Tbf the ori basically are gods and they literally gain power through faith

>we're bringing in the two leads from Farscape because Farscape was organically popular while Stargate was old and lost a lotta steam due to how stupidly the power escalation went
>but just to remind the audience this isn't Farscape we're gonna pair Claudia Black up with Dr. Daniel Jackson

>>937147634
You wouldn't?

>>937147641
based

I don't mind the later seasons of SG-1. I was more in it for the campy episodic stuff rather than the overarching plot.

>>937147645
it's odd when i was younger, YES.
just re- watching SG1 now and holy hell, it's this the woman i was masturbating to?

>>937147646
Ayy gonna get pregnant

>>937147645
I would because she looks like someone I know

>>937147646
holy fuck Carter is pure sexo

>>937147648
Even if she offered you sum fuk?

I'm still forever mad Atlantis ended just when we were about to get more kino earth episodes.

>>937147520
Spinning is so much cooler than not spinning.

>>937147523
No what he's talking about is when another gate was dialing earth. They'd punch in the sequence in the DHD and open the gate in seconds, but when the pov flipped back to the SGC being dialed-in you'd see the gate spinning and taking 10x longer to open.

Does anyone have the Prigozhin jaffa post?

>>937147655
Incoming dials on earth end are inconsistent as fuck I'll definitely agree on that.

>>937147648
All sci-fi is like that. Go back and watch firefly, Inara goes from this otherworldly goddess to a 7/10

>>937147658
I still wanna fuck the blue mommy from Farscape.

FUCK.
I have FINISHED stargate. And Farscape. And Firefly. And all Star Treks from Enterprise backwards. And I'm nearing the end of babylon 5.

What is there to watch next

>>937147660
Lexx.

>>937147660
Andromeda.

>>937147660
Red Dwarf.

>>937147631
For me it's Osiris.

>>937147660
You are running the gauntlet my man.
Orville had a rough s1, then the next few seasons I liked, then the last season had a lot of stinkers and some really shit writing.
The Expanse S1-2 were great. Then it was decent, then the last season was shit.
Another Life on netflix had a cool idea, but was complete and absolute shit. Ungodly terrible character writing.
The original Battlestar Galactica was good, but definitely a different era.
I didn't like the newer Battlestar, but a lot of people did.
>>937147661
My man.

>>937147631
her episode was my sexual awakening

>>937147662
Wow I memory holed this show for decades now.
I remember nothing besides the captain and the ship. I just remember it being a really lackluster show.
I should watch some of it again.

>>937147667
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oVkmC1CrpQM

>>937147667
it has its moments
gets bad around season 4, and becomes irredeemable dogshit in season 5
there's some fun cameos from stargate and trek actors in some episodes though, along with that dude who was candyman (forget his name) and michael ironside iirc

UNSCHEDULED OFFSERVER ACTIVATION!!!

>>937147573
he was absolutely great

>>937147667
>>937147669
It goes downhill from middle of season 2 onwards.
Kevin Sorbo demanded simpler stories with more action so they fired Robert Hewitt Wolfe.

>>937147608

Don't forget Babylon 5.

>>937147671
>dead at 56 in a windsurfing accident
what a way to go

>>937147674
we could never
also check out the babylon 5 mod for freespace 2 if you havent already, its pretty much the best B5 'game' we're ever going to get

>>937147674
Meesta garibaldi

>>937147675

>>937147676

I loved the original movie but never seen anything made after it. Should I dive in?

>>937147680
Most Seasons are pretty good, yeah

>>937147517 (OP)
See you later bros, wish me luck on this planet you're sending me too, I heard they have tendies I'm trust you.

>>937147680
you have missed out on some of the greatest KINO

>>937147683
I didn't realize before, but he managed to convince Teal'c to help him play golf in these loops, fucking kek.
It is the blackhole episode, right?

>>937147684
I meant the Ancien time machine episode, not the black hole (no loops), woops.

>>937147684
>>937147685

>>937147684
Tealc was also caught in the time loop with him

>>937147687
Oh, totally forgot about that. Maybe it's time for me to watch it again...

>>937147684
Teal'c started every loop getting a door slammed into his face so it's easy to see why he was so quickly convinced to stop giving a shit

They also spent like a month in that time loop

>>937147674

>>937147688

>>937147689
The tokra said it was several months that they were unable to contact them

>>937147691

I love sg-1 but the time travel shit made the show end on a low point in season 8. Though I thought that one episode with time travel and the insidious advanced race making humans infertile was great.

>>937147693
kek

Farscape and Babylon 5 best

>>937147519

>>937147694
>the insidious advanced race making humans infertile
that episode has lived rent-free in my head for around 20 years

does anyone have that 'I use a p90 for home defense' pasta? I've been looking for it for ages.

>It's a Maybourne episode
Has there been a character that went from completely hated to beloved, since this guy.

>>937147699
I only saw the one form that had..
Use: Stargate LARPing.

I wish this character made another appearance.

>>937147704
It's weird to me that someone can just be immune to Zats.

>>937147680
It's great, though it takes liberties over the original movie. The TV shows are essentially a different canon (or an alternate universe), where the events of the movie still took place, but with different types of aliens, different people with similar names etc. A sort of weird shifting things around.

Season 1 of SG-1 isn't strong, but it picks up from there. The mid-run seasons are fantastic. Seasons 9 and 10 lose some steam, but the show never turns bad. There's only one episode in its entire run that fans would recommend new viewers to skip (S1, "Emancipation"). 9/10 Sci-fi, almost want to give it a full 10.

Atlantis is good, but sloppy. Its highs are just as high as SG-1s, but its lows are lower. I find its setting, characters, visual design, music etc. extremely comfy, but it is plagued with occasional aimless writing and a loss of direction in its last two seasons. 7.5/10, personal bias wants to go for an 8.5.

Universe has a cool concept, but it gets bogged down in contrived BSG-inspired interpersonal drama for its first season, and the writing asspulls all kinds of devices to allow the characters to not deal with the limitations initially dealt to them by their circumstances. It starts getting really good through season 2, only to end on a cliffhanger after cancellation. 5/10.

TL;DR You're likely to love SG-1 and enjoy at least parts of Atlantis.

>>937147517 (OP)
>see pic
>instantly think of Midna's butthole
This place ruined me.

>>937147706
>Seasons 9 and 10 lose some steam
8, 9 and 10 were all completely superfluous.

>>937147671
>top ten tau'ri torments
read that as top ten tau'ri moments.
and to be honest there were plenty of R E T A R D moments by star gate command

>7of9 at home

I think the Asgard had the best ships.

>>937147710

>>937147595
>armoUr

>>937147708
Superfluous, but not bad. Still good sci-fi in their own right, even if they don't feel like the SG-1 of old.

>>937147705
I assumed it was his armor

>>937147711
For me, it's the wraith.

>>937147665
New Battlestar had plenty of stuff wrong with it, but it also had about 1/3 of the show being the best military sci-fi television ever produced. It's worth the slog, just dont be afraid to skip sections.

>>937147645
I know my dad would. I watched Pitch Black with him and that was one the first things he said after seeing her character.

>>937147715
One of the later episodes had Jack tank a zat shot. The one with this chick.

>>937147717
I couldn't stop laughing at the sex scenes in the first episode to take it seriously.

>>937147706
>loss of direction in its last two seasons
I think that the last season, s5, actually got better than s4. Less direction than s1 and 2, but it had a lot more good episodes and consistency.

>>937147714
It just doesn't feel the same without MacGyver

>>937147720
Was that the miniseries opener? It's been a while, but i remember really liking it.
The first time I watched it, I watched in the wrong order and thought it was in media res, and still ended up liking it.

>>937147571
based

>average best in slot aesthetic

>>937147723
yeah the antagonist lady killed a baby in its stroller and had a sex scene immediately after kek

yjk

>>937147717
First two seasons are great. After that they clearly had no idea what the fuck they were doing.

>>937147658
Yeah the characters they try to push as sexy rarely hold up. Meanwhile Ezri gets cuter every time I watch DS9.

>>937147730

>>937147730
they still very fine. some even more fine than back in the days

>>937147732
couldn't stand that terrible show

>>937147733

>>937147732
Never made it passed the first 5 eps. Is it worth it at all?

Atlantis sucks, there I said it.

i only watched sg-1 on tv decades ago and binged all of it recently, how is atlantis and farscape?
i wasn't tempted to watch atlantis due to the different cast back then and i never saw farscape here.
after seeing that one episode branching both sg1 to atlantis i'm still not sold on the atlantis crew

>>937147736
Not really.

>>937147736
It's very forgettable.

>>937147738
>atlantis
bro unless you like their annoying bitch of a boss
no

>>937147738
Farscape is great.

>>937147738
Atlantis is just more late season Stargate. The Wraiths are pretty cool. It won't capture early SG-1 though.
Farscape is god tier but completely different in tone.

>>937147738
I loved Atlantis, but I think it REALLY hinges on whether you can stand Rodney. If not I'd imagine the show would be unbearable.

The failed normalfags of /tv/ can go the fuck back.

>>937147741
The show improves drastically when she gets replaced by Sam... and even more when she gets replaced by Woolsey.

>>937147687
so teal'c had to relieve the same day for possibly thousands of years
and then in the end, you know what
no man has endured more boredom
maybe
depends on how freaky he got with all that time

>>937147745

>>937147740
yeah, that's why it's a fucking classic loved by millions and we still regularly get popular threads about it on fucking /v/ of all places
btw I am once again requesting a well made official stargate themed xcom-like
thank you

>>937147749
I was referring to Universe specifically.

>>937147749
Bro we're talking about SG-U

>>937147750
oh sorry, my bad

>>937147711
I really like the chonky initial human ship, with those two fuckhueg engines at its back, it's like a child designed it and I love it

>>937147736
You basically watch it for Hitler and the fat boy. They had some moments later on. But that's it. I genuinely don't remember anything. Other than maybe that asian chick being a lesbian or something.

>>937147710
>>937147712

/tv/ dumping their trash on /b/ again?

>>937147798
I'm reading /v/'s gate code, sir

Faggot mod

>>937147710
>>937147712

>>937147874
/v/ is the place to be for sci-fi tv threads

>>937147798
>/tv/ sends the gate activation to /v/
>/v/ sends the gate activation to /b/

why was this sent to /b/ and not /tv/??

>>937148070
rape

>>937147547
Yeah OK. The only game that's managed to be close to the next vermintide is darktide. And it's made by the same people. The genre is obviously cursed and only swedistan can figure it out.

you will never understand my pain
you fans of popular sci fi shows will never experience wanting to look up your favorite childhood show but you simply cant cause the fucking piece of shit has only ONE LETTER IN THE DAMN TITLE so it wont show up in any streaming service or torrent search engine cause goddamnit they all want 3 letters minimum. god forbid a streaming service show everything it has sorted alphabetically for once.
here's the trailer for it
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eFCaTbj4_2c

>>937148070
/tv/ is too weak for us

>>937148158
i understand your pain, /b/rother

>>937148158
did you try.. like
>V 2009

>>937148238

Retard mod. /v/ scifi threads are alwats great.

>>937147517 (OP)

>>937147729
Ezri is best girl

>>937147564
Anubis was a total basement dwelling coom brain

>>937148859
Thats not 7

>>937148859
And It's not even close.

Stargate is video games btw
The main reason why I love the archaeo-alien aesthetic

>>937147584
the writing of B5 and especially the Sheridan character was atrocious
instead of the sober chess-like treatment of politics in DS9, with B5 we got moralizing goddamn sermons.

>>937149091
Cope harder. Seven is just another blond bimbo

>>937147600
HEY YOU, IN THE SKIRT, YES YOU, SHAKE YOUR ASS

>>937147603
>How is Farscape and DS9? What about SG-1?
watch them all

>>937147537
You would fuckin faggot.

>>937148760
Found the full screencap

>>937148158
bitch stop whining it's all there
https://1337x.to/category-search/v%202009/TV/1/

>>937147742
lmao what the fuck I don't remember that is that some extra on the dvd box set or what?

>>937147738
atlantis and farscape are fine. give them a look.