haiiii, how are u doiinng? have something to telll?

>>22989663 (OP)
i am not doing well

>>22989663 (OP)
i am not doing well

>>22989668
>>22989683
seems like a troubled day, what happend?

God please make the beeping stop.

>>22989663 (OP)
starting to relax after a long day, how bout you?

>>22989663 (OP)
hi <3
i slept through my alarm today, it hasn't happened before
cloudy day
i had some coffee and oatmeal

>>22989696
smoke detector beeping?

>>22989696
god thats annoyinh
>>22989699
goood, nothing much, chiolling and doing some DIY
>>22989749
oohhhh, u had something oimmpotatnt?

>>22989997
nice
just zoning out to youtube

>>22989663 (OP)
the jewpills are not working in my country

>>22989663 (OP)
shit's looking grim
all things considered

>>22990002
>just zoning out to youtube
what sr u watchng?
>>22990023
jewpills

>>22990031
>shit's looking grim
huhh?

No, I haven't done that much. I might take a walk with all the cold outside. Maybe that will help me to wake up and stop being a fag
What about you?

>>22990107
> I might take a walk
thats cool, take care and Get off well

>>22989663 (OP)

>>22990442
almost posted that lol
>>22989997
nothing important really, i just try to hold onto a regular sleep schedule
the nighttime is nice but there's always more opportunity in the daytime, in general
idk

>>22990442
yayyyyyyyyyyy
>>22990466
> i just try to hold onto a regular sleep schedule
thats goood

>>22990305
I'm back, it was nice. You should try it some day

>>22990545
i think udo goes outside often
did anything interesting happen on the walk?
>>22990528
yes

>>22990049
cooking
bideo gayme lore
practical things like forging/electrical
what's your zone out algorithm look like?

>>22990545
>You should try it some day
i should
>>22990562
>i think udo goes outside often
mah not so much
>>22990595
yeah almost the same, cooking asmr, slime asmr too, mostl asmr

>>22990679
pretty chill

>>22990562
>did anything interesting happen on the walk?
Not really. I saw a car from a private security agency though, that was a bit curious

>>22990679
ah my bad
>>22990734
i see
i remember seeing an armored truck on the other side of the gas station pump from my car
i always wonder what's in those things

I'm slowly losing more of myself everyday.
forever lost in black and white scenes, together lost in unknown streets
The sad clown seeks paradise to not be astray
In painful colours into a canvas it bleeds

----
I'm feeling extra clowny today. My brain is deteriorating more and more. I miss my older self, and only thing that can get me back in that state is getting shit drunk on vodka(which i dont have now). shitty lyrics, but im gonna get better at it eventually.

>>22990751
Probably a squad of Cerberus
>>22990762
What happened to you, Ritsu?

>>22990784
https://youtu.be/C-eD9UBrCsw?si=rRSto563Mrfaqacp
Idk. I feel like a massive giant joke and that my entire life lead to be becoming a joke. Shit, i cringe at myself at even talking like this right now. I'm just saying whatever from the top of my head and just spitting it out half caring. I fucking drank a whole vodka bottle and puked all over my floor and that was the happiest I have been in years. It made me feel like I was a kid again. i didnt understand alcoholics until that happened

>>22990801
>i didnt understand alcoholics until that happened
Relatable
>I feel like a massive giant joke and that my entire life lead to be becoming a joke
Have you lost your focus or lost your objectives/goals? I can kind of empathize with you, but just partially because I'm more into the full psychotic side rather that the joker-like side

i need friends,who wanna be my friend?

>>22990829
I haven't lost my objectives yet. I'm just unsure how or what I'm feeling. It's like having several contradictions be active at the same time. I'm remarkably sane I'm not prone to hallucinations like other people which I'm happy for.
The driver steering wheel has been removed and I'm stuck in a car that's going crazy.
My life keeps getting more humilating.
FUCK there is so real way to explain it. I get so fucking angry these days it makes me want to cut a finger or a toe because if I do that people will know something is up with me instead of just seeing me as normal. and that is pleasurable somehow

>>22990849

>>22991088
>I get so fucking angry these days it makes me want to cut a finger or a toe because if I do that people will know something is up with me instead of just seeing me as normal. and that is pleasurable somehow
one of the three common types of maladaptive daydreaming is fantasizing about being in a hospital bed, with some terminal illness or something, being given attention/love by people important to you

the other two common ones are ultimate power, and dangerous/exciting scenarios like chased by a tiger or being in a warzone or whatever

>>22990849
Hi freind. The water is really warm here

>>22991142
Sorry you took me seriously. this convo would be way better if I was drunk. I'm gonna go and do something else. I'm just making some shit music now and seeing where it goes.

>>22991166
it was a dumb thing to say in retrospect, just infodumping stuff
>I'm gonna go and do something else. I'm just making some shit music now and seeing where it goes.
that's good
a lot of people wait until they're happy to start working/moving, but alot of the time, you start working/moving and become happy
but yeah, be careful ritsu

>>22991166
pick yourself up, it's a brand new day

>>22989878
alarm clock

>>22991300
ah