Thread 21416520

>Be eight or nine
>Mom gets both 2% and whole milk
>Notice in the only one who drinks the 2%
>My father buys two gallons of whole
>Mom is a bit disappointed
>Ask why
>She said she buys the 2% just for me because it has “less grease”
>Same woman believes her home cooking is always healthy
>Says the bright orange fat dripping out whenever she makes eggs and chorizo is “healthy fat”

Got any other similar stories /CK/?

>>21416520 (OP)
Animal fat is likely 6 gorillion times healthier than Sneed oils, tranny

>>21416532
What an odd response. The fat in the whole milk is also animal fat.

>>21416676
Look bro, I'm not your doctor. I have can provide no gender surgery consultation.

>"dad, can I have a sundae?"
>no, that's illegal; it's Thursday
>"oh, okay."

>>21416680
>I have can provide no
Holy ESL Hombre Murciélago!

>>21416532
What makes it healthy?

Before I moved to America from yurp, my mum, who lived in the US and Mexico while doing her botany doctorate work, warned me not to eat at white American people's houses unless they were from the South. Turns out, even southerners can't cook for shit here.

>>21416520 (OP)
Your mom is a dense cunt.

>>21416532
I would be inclined to agree, anon.

>>21416532
>>21416680
take your meds

>>21416855
Yeah, take your meds you dense cunts.

>>21416520 (OP)
YOUR ASS IS A FUCKING SPIC! A BEANER! NO LITTLE WHITE BOY'S MOM MAKES CHORIZO - STOP POSTING!

>>21416855
I love cute trannies ngl

>>21416875
>I love cute trannies ngl
The only people that don't love cute trannies are dense cunts.

>>21416520 (OP)
>you need to grease the (non stick) pan with lard before cooking bacon
>it's unhealthy to eat more than a third of your diet raw (including fruits, nuts, veegetables, salad, and for some reason bread but not toast)
>butter and cream are full of vital vitamins you can't get elswhere
>therefore cheesecake is comparable to fruit in fact it's better

>>21416532
Who brought any of those concepts into this argument other than you?

>>21416682
>Holy ESL Hombre Murciélago!
I'm glad you type at a 3rd grade level, but here in real countries, we've learned more advanced grammar than SEE SPOT RUN. Best of luck with your life in a 3rd world shithole.

>>21416520 (OP)
Mom put jelly beans in meatballs for April fools.

Entire family threw up cause of it. A meatball with a grape flavored jelly bean is still one of the worst things Ive ever tasted in all my life. I cried. It was that awful

>>21416520 (OP)
Ugh yeah your mom was such a DUMB BITCH for trying to give you what she thought was best. Lmao what a fucking RETARD! She actually tried to give you stuff she thought was good, despite holding misled views on nutrition? LMFAO! Your mother must have been a fucking dumb CUNT! LMAO nice thread! Tell that slut what's what!

i buy whatever milk has the oldest expiration date. i think the extra day or two makes a bigger difference than 2% or whole

>>21416680
Dumb esl
>>21417081
Did your parents legit think this stuff anon? Does the condition run in the family?

>>21417149
But you has can't provide yes grammar that as to which I QED

>>21416520 (OP)
I think you and your whole family are retarded. Hows that?

>>21417149
In what country is "I have can provide no" a meaningful string of words?

>>21417159
Based mom pulling the most memorable april fools prank of your life, putting dad to shame.

>>21417176
i'm pretty sure it's just deeply internalized cope but they live by it however it hasn't been passed on to me or my brother although i lament my diet as a teenager
as for my extended family, i think they are mostly more normal but not everyone even pretends to care about their diet and some of them drink daily

>>21416680
Unfortunately your school
>have can provide
you no education, you fucking dolt.

waiting for mom whiteknight to arrive and call posters itt who grew up with a substandard mother figure bigots and rapists
when me and my brother were little my mom served us cauliflower and when i asked what it was she said 'cauliflower' and of course i didnt know what that was but i knew what koalas and flowers and flour were so i just settled on that it had been named that for SOME reason and i'd ask about it, but my dad went ahead and went the dad route and said well you know how they squeeze olives to make olive oil, and squeeze babies to make baby oil, and my brother got red in the face and shouted YOURE ALWAYS LYING. YOURE ALWAYS FUCKING WITH US! KOALAS ARE ANIMALS AND THIS IS WHITE BROCCOLI and my dad said youre right pal, i'm sorry

>>21416520 (OP)
Mom told me brocolli was "rich people food"
I have no idea what she was trying to say

>>21416520 (OP)
the the food on our table was taken directly out of the hands of african children, and we better eat it because we were making children starve to have this food on our table.

>>21416520 (OP)
When I was little my mom told me that if you swallow chewing gum it stays in your stomach for 7 years. After I was married I told my husband and he laughed until he choked me unconscious and then raped me viciously in every hole!

>>21416676
what an odd response you fucking troon.
29%
30%
31%
32%
33%
34%
35%36%
37%
38%
39%
40%
41%
42%
43%

Don't they add sugar as they skim the fat?

>>21418430
Don't put me one the side of trannies just because I think you're a retard.

>>21416520 (OP)
>Making frozen pizza for first time as an 8 year old
>Mom tells me to wait for her to get back before putting the pizza in the oven
>I know that I can put it in myself
>Going extremely slowly and carefully because I'm afraid of the oven burning me
>Mom comes back in and walks in on me inserting the pizza and screams at the top of her lungs
>Get startled and drop the pizza and it falls onto the inside of the oven lid
>She picks up the pizza with her bare hands and throws it across the room
>Bounces off the wall and lands in the sink
>No pizza

>>21418565
>>21418567

She's right lower percent milk has less fat in it. If you drink milk for the nutritional value you can drink skim milk get everything but a small extra number of calories.

>>21418433
No, they do not. Where the fuck did you even hear that?

>>21418998
Your mom.

>>21418998
>No, they do not. Where the fuck did you even hear that?
It's one of those half truths. Removing the fat changes the ratio of calories from lactose which means it's higher in calories derived from sugars.

My parents bought fully into the "fat is bad for you" meme.
>Only skim milk, ever
>didnt have bacon for the first time until I was like 16
>Never cooked with butter or liquid oils, only PAM
>mom would drain and skim any fat that was released from cooking meat
We always had plenty of pop tarts, sugar cereal, sodas, and ice cream tho...

>>21417159
>A meatball with a grape flavored jelly bean is still one of the worst things Ive ever tasted in all my life. I cried.

You are a massive pussy. Kill yourself.

>>21419026
Skim milk is fine. Most people that grew up with one type of milk will tend to like that as adults. Needing full fat milk for cooking is rare and almost always can be substituted by any other added fat.

>>21419022
Sometimes I really feel for the people that provide nutritional information to the masses, 'cause goddamn are people stupid.

>>21419031
skim milk is watery shit for limp wristed faggots and any substitute for milk is blatantly inferior.

>>21416681
He just didn't want to buy you a sundae.

>>21416520 (OP)
One time before I was born my dad ate a sandwich that had been sitting in his car all day and got sick. To this day my mom still thinks mayonnaise turns poisonous if you heat it up.

>>21416520 (OP)
>margarine is healthty and much better than olive oil or butter
>potatoes are a superfood that can not make you fat
>its fine to Have food sitting on the stove for 48 hours at room temp
>use by date is crucial

>>21419045
She's not wrong, it's just that it has to stay warm for some time.

>>21419022
That's not what the term half-truth means.

>>21416520 (OP)
>My father buys two gallons of whole
Why is no one mentioning this clearly bullshit OP
Who the fuck buys 8L of milk?

>>21419287
Yeah your right converting gallon to liters to make it look unreasonable makes the story not true.

>"that's healthy!"
>"not too much spice!"

yes, your mom is a dumb whore let's all laugh at the cunt

>>21419298
now it's your turn, what'd yours do?

>>21416532
OBSESSED

>>21419290
This is a very strange shrieking seethe

>>21419382
I'm sorry you're so upset that your obviously ridiculous line of logic was pointed out to be utterly fallacious.

>>21419031
Skim milk is a scam. Just buy real milk for the same price and water it down yourself for free.

>>21419394
No, that wasn't me. I was just pointing out what I pointed out. I shall not point it out again

>>21417149
lol, you're not getting out of this one, Paco.

>>21416864
Holy edgy teenage bullshit, what are you doing?
lol

>>21417159
If the entire family vomited it wasn't from the jelly beans. That wouldn't make anyone violently ill. It would just taste weird. I've had meatballs with raisins and it wasn't all that odd.

She must have left something unrefrigerated.

>>21417165
You need a nap, faggot.

>>21419287
A man with a family.
I'm one man and I still buy 4liters at a time for myself, sometimes 6.

>>21416532
fpbp

>>21419287
We always have at least a gallon and a half at all times and we're just three people, me, the lactose intolerant missus and our kid. The gallon is for me and him, the half is lactose free for her.
>>21419290
A gallon is 3.78 liters, if memory serves. He ain't too far off the mark but just rounding up to 8L.

>>21419626
What do you think the point of my post was?

>>21419634
Why do you think I would care?

>>21419654

You tell me, you keep responding.

>>21419659
You tell me. You keep responding.

>>21419287
I buy 2 gallons a week for myself. 1 to drink straight, and one for cereal/cooking/etc.

>>21418127
you just made me have a crush on his mom, wtf

>>21416688
Your mom wants you to get heart disease
Southern home cooking is "good" because it's heart disease inducing, New England home cooking is "bad" because it's baked chicken with boiled vegetables except lasagna on Sunday. It may be boring but you'll live to 200 if you keep eating it.

>>21420835
>you live forever
>but you have to eat American British food
I'll die at 50 eating fried green tomatoes, thanks.

>>21420835
Funny enough, I prefer boiled vegetables over roasted ones. Just add a little fat and I'm good.

>>21420967
>How can we make the shit, mushy texture of tomatoes worse?
>Combine it with the godawful taste of unripe tomatoes but deep fry it so it stays mushy and becomes unhealthy too
Black excellence

>>21421031
You're not my parent, but I nominate this post for the thread topic.

>>21418363
lmao based lil bro shutting down the bullshit. I always hated that as a child when an adult thought I was retarded and would talk down and make up some completely inane bullshit to entertain themselves at my expense. Very self centered, treating the child as if they're not real people, kinda like a toy.

>>21416520 (OP)
Your mother was doing that to spite your father. She knew that your father preferred whole milk so she fed her son different milk out of spite to annoy him. It was a shit test, he obviously noticed and passed because he bought extra whole milk. Women fucking suck oh my fucking god.

ITT: grown men spew hate at the woman who gave her life to raise them. easily the most pathetic thread in /ck/ history.

>>21420835
why did my parents want me to get heart disease? they still do they get outright offended if i decline a half pound bacon sandwich where the bacon was practically fried in added fat
the sad thing about arteriosclerosis is it's irreversible

>>21417081
This is all true tho

>>21421386
Absolute statements are always false when it comes to diet and nutrition.

>>21421059
>quote somebody saying dumb shit
>"that means you »HATE« them"

when do we as a society start executing schizos

>>21421389
>always
anon, i...

>>21421059
How's your relationship with your father?

>>21421658
You really need to work on your reading comprehension skills, fatso.

>>21421694
"Always" makes it an absolute statement, which are almost always incorrect regardless of context.
For example:
>drinking a glass of pure mercury is never healthy
is an absolute statement about diet and nutrition, but you'd have to be genuinely retarded to claim that it's false. Which makes your previous statement about absolutes false.

Pick up a book sometime, and try not to eat it.

>>21419056
>its fine to Have food sitting on the stove for 48 hours at room temp
that is true for most cooked things tho

>>21417464
Haha fucking kek

>>21421698
Jesus. You really, really, really need to work on your reading comprehension skills, you fucking retard. Or, at the very least, ask why someone has told you that you need to work on them rather than doubling down and proving them correct.

>>21421698
>your previous statement
Not mine. Just pointing out that you can't read. Sorry classes were cut for COVID, zoomzoom. : (
And do learn not to jump to conclusions. It's really not a good look that I have to correct you not once but twice. So not only so you have reading comprehension to work on, but also logic and rhetoric. You've got your work cut out for you!

>>21416520 (OP)
>Dad drank milk
Did you grow up in a surreal movie?

>>21421716
>>21421719
>[screeching]
Aw, this kid's MAD mad.
I've already made my point. If you can prove me wrong, feel free to do so.
Just use English so real humans can read it, okay?

>>21421729
>when it comes to diet and nutrition.

Rather than correct >>21421389's qualifier, >>21421658 incorrectly attempts to point out that the post made an absolute statement without understanding that the qualifier negates her point. When pointed out that she needs to learn to read, she posts >>21421698, moving her goalpost from a simple "but you used an absolute statement! GOTCHA!" to a more correct, albeit as a reduction to absurdity, point that stating that drinking mercury is never healthy proves that absolute statements can be valid even in reference to diet, thereby undoing her previous implication and running with a new one. If that was her point all along, she wouldn't have highlighted "always" as the point to harp on.
So yes, I stand by what I said: you, madam, are fat, you need to work on reading comprehension and you needed to work on logic and rhetoric.

>>21421725
No, just white.

>>21421675
Great relationship with both parents, why do you ask? They are retired now and I put them up in a nice beach bungalow.

>>21422234
Based provider son

>>21421790
I skimmed, but nothing you said seems relevant.
Sorry that happened, or whatever.