Thread 21512375

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>>21512375 (OP)
yes but it's an annoying process for a single person who has no idea of how to do it.

>>21512375 (OP)
>>21512382
>>21512384
chocolate has the same color as a hot woman's stinky shit LMAO

>>21512392
calm down poss

I'm gonna take it to my mom and see what we can do. I'll keep a seed to plant, for sure.

>>21512375 (OP)
This nigga trying to make candy with the marker from Dead Space.

>>21512375 (OP)
Yea but you need some fancy equipment. I went through this phase of wanting to make chocolate from scratch until I realized how expensive it is. You need certain machinery or it won't work properly.

>>21512392
i get it lol
poopoo caca

>>21512902
You need a container you can seal to ferment the beans, a cookie sheet you can sit outside in the sun to dry the beans, an oven to roast the beans, something to grind the beans with, and a pot that you can cook the bean paste and sugar in.

That's it. Actually getting the cocoa pods is literally the hardest, most expensive part of homemade chocolate.

>>21512917
Fermenting is pointless to do at home. It's for processing huge loads of cocoa pods. If you want to process just a few, eat the fruit off of them and spit out the seeds. Eatin' and suckin' > fermenting

>>21512961
does raw bone-in chocolate meat taste like chocolate?

>>21512917
it's the grinder. from what I recall, you need something that's going to grind it extremely fine. No normal grinder will work. It has to do something with how it reacts with a certain type of grinder. Also, tempering chocolate and fucking with cacao butter, it's a lot of stuff to get into.

>>21513345
the grinders are called melangers, or wet stone grinders and they get pretty expensive. I mean, they're about 200-500 dollars realistically, which isn't much for a solid appliance, but realistically what else would you be using it for?

>>21513342
The fruit tastes nothing like chocolate.

>>21513371
what does it taste like?

>>21513375
A tropical fruit — something in the mango, guava, pineapple direction. It's a good flavor, but the fruit pulp is rather thin. There's a related fruit called a cupuaçu with a better flesh to seed ratio as a fruit, but you can't make chocolate from it.

>>21513375
nta, never ate the fruit itself but I've tried cacao butter and it really has no taste. it's just fat, basically. I'd imagine the fruit being somewhat similar

>>21513383
that sounds interesting. I thought it'd be bitter or something like a coffee.

>>21512392
Calm down Johnny Depp

>>21512392
Same as your skin rofl lol

>>21512375 (OP)
Yes, I've done it. You'll still need some cocoa butter to make good chocolate, which in theory you could grind and extract from your nibs but is not feasible at home. Buy some cocoa butter online, instead.

>ferment the beans for 5-7 days until very slimy and boozey smelling
>dry & roast them until they're dark
>break the shells and winnow them from the nibs
>grind the nibs with the sugar (depends what %dark you want), preferably in an actual stone melanger for smoothest results, but you can get it nearly as fine with a 2hp blender
>add in 5-8% by weight cocoa butter
>temper the chocolate by heating to 46C, stir & cool to 30C, heat again to 32C, then pour into molds

>>21512375 (OP)
I'm sure if you jam that up your ass it'll loosen you up and let the chocolate flow.

>>21513383
There's also the relative Theobroma bicolor which can also be made into a chocolate. It has a milder flavor, more like peanuts or hazelnuts.

>>21512375 (OP)
Your garloid looks deathly ill. Wtf have you been feeding it?

>>21512392
BRRRAAAAAAAAAPP

>>21512917
>grind
no, you need a very fine mill for it
>>21512375 (OP)
1 pod is just too little for the hassle

>>21514492
oh so now we have AI auto censoring previously flagged images, neat...

>>21514505
What extension are you using?

>>21514595
The image looks like this on my end

I'm growing my own cocoa tree. It's 5ft and just flowered recently for the first time. What machinery, exactly, would I need if I wanted to upscale dramatically?

>>21512375 (OP)
>eat the pulp
>dry the seeds
>roast them
>grind them up
>get chocolate
It's literally that easy.

>>21515224
Wrong, they gave to be fermented first.

>>21515561
Is it strictly necessary? If I had fresh pods available I'd try everything that is not usually sold at the store. Unfermented, various degrees of roasting or even no roasting at all, just slow drying.

>>21512375 (OP)
>>21513607 This guy knows.

> Also, this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g-F8zL3Ufi4

You can watch Alex's full series on bean to bar chocolate.

>>21512375 (OP)
I should call her.

>>21515883
Mares don't have phones.

>>21512375 (OP)
Yeah I've done it. I used two, and it made one single chocolate bar. I had to buy a silicone mold from Amazon. It took over a week for the fruit to ferment. The chocolate bar was crunchy in a strange way, like there was malt powder in it or something. I recommend doing it once for fun but I wouldn't do it again.

>>21512917
>seal to ferment
What the fuck don't do that
>sun to dry the beans
Or a low oven

>>21513349
Could make sauces in them i guess?

>>21515883
it's probably best you don't bro. i dont think it's human.

>>21515991
>The chocolate bar was crunchy in a strange way, like there was malt powder in it or something.
i think that's due to not tempering it properly. basically, the melting process requires a certain way of doing it or else when the melted mix hardens, it won't have the proper characteristics a chocolate bar should have. something about how the sugar crystalizes and how that impacts the final product.

>>21516120
yea that's true. Possibly even spice powders if that's something you'd want to do. me personally, i wouldn't feel right spending so much on a product, especially since I know I wouldn't use it much and I don't have easy access to cacao pods to begin with. I could see if you lived in an area that does, it would have more use.

>>21516120
now that I think about it, I wonder if you could make flours out of it? I'd imagine running anything dry through that would turn it into a powder.

>>21512392
what are the women in your region eating to shit red anon?

Update

This is what the seed looks like inside

Put the wet seeds into a container with the white stuff around it, let it ferment for a few days. Dry it out
Get a poppery popcorn popper. Roast until nicely browned, like coffee

>>21518201
Crack and winnow the seeds. Use coffee grinder to turn seeds into nibs

>>21518202
Put into nut grinder or ideally a benchtop grinder ($300). Add sugar to whatever % you want. For example, 70g of cocoa nibs to 30g of sugar is 70% dark chocolate.

>>21518206
Grind for 1 - 3 days. Adding sugar later in the process can help mitigate bitterness. Sugar holds onto more flavors out of the gate.
Then temper. Benchtop if you're a gigachad. Sous vide if you want something semi easy. Bench top tempering machine would be about $250. Once done mold into acrylic mold ($30) and allow to set for 24 hours before demolding, room temps need to be between 66f and 72f, do not refrigerate to speed up process

>>21515599
It is necessary, unfortunately. The bacteria and yeast in the pulp coating metabolize the pulp producing lactic and acetic acid, among other things that then alters the bean itself ofver a week's time. It changes the bean from very bitter and astringent to a more mellow cholately taste. Personally, if I had a fresh cacao pod, I'd plant every single one of those seeds. You can grow cacao potted indoors by a not too sunny window and they'll flower by year 3. I just killed my only tree by letting it get too much sun outside..

>>21518209
There are no fats/oil in chocolate? I thought it at least had palm oil or some kind of animal fat as a binder.

>>21512392
This website has made people too comfortable saying sick things
It's not 2012 anymore. There is no shock effect reading this. It's just sad

>>21518289
typically cacao butter is used.

>>21518289
If using whole seeds/nibs, those are already 40~60% fat, therefore no extra is technically needed. But juicing the cocoa butter content can help with texture and tempering.

OP here.

I just brought the cocoa to my mom because she's never seen one. When I'm back home, I'll buy a few and try to make chocolate with them. I'll ferment it and everything. I only have one coffee grinder, tho

>>21518312
Stinky poopoo. Haha. Nasty caca. Hehe doody.

>>21512375 (OP)
I did, it takes like a week and it didn't taste great, the fermenting part is hard if you don't know how to do it (I didn't know how to do it properly)

>>21518376
share the photos

>>21513349
>the grinders are called melangers, or wet stone grinders and they get pretty expensive. I mean, they're about 200-500 dollars realistically, which isn't much for a solid appliance, but realistically what else would you be using it for?
Use a basic mortar and pestle for the course grinding.
Then, buy a glass paint muller from an art supply store like Dick Blick.
Artist pigment mullers are designed to grind pigments really fine, and mix the pigments with oil or other binders.
The glass would be inert.
https://www.dickblick.com/products/paint-muller-set/?srsltid=AfmBOoopQvoN3RaZgNgQRaOsIarKIQKycI1CG1C1W3CI8iVbnWtaW5do

>>21518312
Go Back or off the internet if you have "grown up" since then

>>21512392
does it taste the same tho

>>21512375 (OP)
aztecs used to do it, so you should be able.
i believe there was one nilered video with him making his own chocolate

>>21512375 (OP)
NO
Return the alien egg to where you found it and hope the nest mother doesnt realize its gone or you took it. If she finds out she will hunt you down and paralyze you with goo until the babies hatch and feast on you while you are still alive.

>>21512375 (OP)
Yes. Try cramming it.