Thread 76731406

>be me.
>29.
>sad voice in head since 6.
>started lifting at 22.
>picking up up heavy things makes the sad voice quieter.
>gym became my prescription.
>could almost pass for a normie if it weren't for the autism and homeless samurai haircut.
>dollar-store Toji meets functional fitness youtuber physique.
>slowly improving self. not optimistic, but less doomer.
>maybe I'll make a dating profile? not confident but maybe i can find a nice gremlin.

>gym closes down.


>3 months pass. haven't found a new gym.
>addicted to video games, youtube and porn.
>sleep at 8AM. wake up 3PM. barely eating.
>only a couple of night shifts per week. enough to pay rent. not for living.
>physique has nearly regressed to teenage years.
>5'8 twink body, norwood 3 head.
>no gf in 12 years. no sex in 6.
>the last glimmer of hope just shit itself and died.
>fuck.
>can't keep living like this, but promised myself i wouldn't rope. still got family.

>>76731406 (OP)
Yeah just give up

>>76731406 (OP)
cont.

>today
>find a new gym.
>it's good. bigger. newer.
>2x as expensive, but it's the cheapest in the area.
>fuck it I'll make it worth it.
>time for a comeback.

>turn up at 7PM. place is still buzzing.
>give the receptionist the bro nod.
>select GYM playlist.
>weeb beats.mp3
>fuck yeah
>pop earbuds in.
>low battery. forgot to charge.
>ohwell.jpg
>i'm on a mission, music be damned.
>group of hot chicks walking by, just finished their workout. yappin.
>booty shorts so tight you could see the pores on their butt cheeks.
>sweat glistening off their exposed chests.
>ahh. if only I didn't have myopia.

>distractedly pull my trusty workout towel out from the bottom of my bag.
>despite the gym beats I hear the sound of something flopping out onto the floor like a pile of wet spaghetti.

>it's my my piss-yellow aliexpress ribbed-and-knobbed-for-your-pleasure pocketpussy.

>WHAT THE FUCK

>took me a second to realize what the fuck just happened
>must have wrapped it in the towel to dry and forgot about it.
>stuff it back in my bag.
>I hear the girls laugh.
>I look at the receptionist.
>bro cannot look at me.
>look up at the security camera.
>dear god. why.


>did 3x12 for bench, pullup, leg press and RDL.
>see you tomorrow at the gym, anon.

>gym closes down.

>3 months pass. haven't found a new gym.

I bought home gym for 100 dollars, can train every muscle.

>>76731413
>fuck yea

>>76731406 (OP)
at least you had sex you fucking faggot

>>76731413
there is no way

Funny thread