>>7613367You chose that life every day. You're the one who got yourself into it in the first place. On top of that you got a family out of it.
You can chose to stay there or you can chose to work it out or leave. That is your burden to bear.
I'll never understand people like you. Feeling like you're entitled to sabotage the lives of others just because your own life is in shambles.
I'm not doing good either but instead of trying to bring others down I try and build myself up. I have plenty of reasons to act as a negative force in the world but if I did I would betray my self in the process and adopt the maladaptive, narrow minded perspective of my past abusers. It's like you've been conquered and twisted by people not even worth your pity. People living in a hole in the ground.
Instead of picking yourself up and chosing to focus on the good you let the evil consume you. Until it is all that you can see.
As an agnostic (since I've experienced a lot of strange phenonemons) I'm open to the idéa that every action has a reaction. Even if it's something as seemingly inconsequential as spreading doom on a forum.
While I do empathise with your circumstances I don't condone the way you're letting it shape your internal perception of reality and in turn the way you unleash it into the world.
When stuck with people like that I made it a rule to focus on the fact that there is both good and evil in this world. Instead of projecting my personal experience onto the world I somehow got out of it with the understanding that what I went through is my story. Knowing that I'm not entitled to taking away from people. Knowing that there is both good and evil in this world if you're open enough to look for it.
If you can still see where I'm coming from then I would highly advice you to protect yourself from people who drive you mad, focus on healing in whatever form is available to you and move forward with your life.