>>212207007 (OP)Yeah... cancer and immune disorders were way above average occurence at my highschool. A lot of the survivors turned to hard drugs and either overdosed or burned off their personalities. My mom had a fatal heart attack three months ago immediately after asking me how many of my friends died before they hit 20.
The way I process grief worries my stepdad. He's afraid I'm going to pop. I have shitty nights when I cry a bit and drink too much when I really miss people, but for the most part, it's straight to acceptance of the things I couldn't change, and forgiving myself for the interventions I should have made.