Mr & Mrs Johnny Vegas edition

satire subedition

I’m going to bed now :)

These are the Olivia Rodrigo fans?

>>212253657
34 inches isn't too bad

aff tae bed

>>212253823
The embodiment of Irish peasantry
Ship them off to the colonies, says I

>>212253833
do me I'm at 54"

>>212253823
too young to be listening to her effing and jeffing all over the place

Timmy seeing absolutely nothing wrong with dating a gook or she-griss

Christianity, indeed, enjoins pride in imbecility. Its god became incarnate to “make folly of the wisdom of this world.” Its votaries must have an unthinking faith in an incomprehensible farrago of patently false statements. To abjure the use of reason is the only path to Salvation and the animal-like joys of eternal idleness in Heaven. Learning and wisdom must be despised. Every effort of human reason to understand the world in which we live is a sin, an affront to a god who has given us the perfect model of righteous wisdom in an oyster.

The repudiation of reason and sanity was a particularly deadly poison to our race, which, as several writers on ethnology have recently pointed out, has in some of its members, at least, an innate capacity for the objective and philosophical thought by which alone our race attained a partial control over the forces of nature and the power to defend itself by imposing its will on other-races.

This power, which we have now fatuously surrendered, was won for us slowly and painfully by the often heroic efforts of a few men and only over the frantic opposition of the Christian witchdoctors. The debased superstition that insanely exalts ignorance over knowledge and faith over reason repressed and deformed for many centuries our race’s unique capacity for a rational and mighty civilisation.

she's a bit sweary for her audience imo

>brass knuckle belt buckle with a little nipple on it
howling

>>212253852
naw i don't believe it

whys he posting screenshots of children

>>212253852
>54”
Nobody is doing you mate

Living in student halls which were build probably in the 1970s with the cheapest shit around and everything is falling apart. Ominous yellow stains on my curtains that look like someone flicked curry on them. Sink for draining anymore. Toilet light flickering violently enough to be a legitimate eclipse risk, and now I pulled my sock draw too hard and the cunting front has gone and fallen off. I'm paying £8,500 a year to live in this dump.

>>212253833
Yea i have extremely broad shoulders and my waist was 34 when i was skinny. Im just a wide bvll

>>212253890
>>212253823
so its a creche then while the adults are off their tits somewhere

she can play the piano
I didn't know that
I respect her more than the other zoomerslags now

>>212253823
>>212253890
literally every one of these girls looks irish, except maybe the pudding on the right in the 2nd pic
they should be at home learning how to read and/or farm potatoes, not listening to this degenerate filth

>>212253890
Rorke crying about some naughty words post-watershed

>>212253923
>was
what is it now?

Is Olivia Rodrigo naked or something I can hear my mum watching it downstairs complaining about someone dressing inappropriately for their age

thats 150K XP gained in Pokemon GO today the

>>212253849
Their parents would have to be upper middle class at least to afford Glastonbury tickets

get it on
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zavj96B2P6o

>>212253921
*sink not draining
*epilepsy risk

>>212253921
checked the price of my old halls today shit's gone from £4k to £10k for 40 weeks
whatever zoomers are in there are being royally ripped off

>>212253944
the irish are degenerate though
it's the pudding who should be farming and reading

business idea: play pokemon go in scotland to run into toby

>watching zoomer slop when prodigy are playing

>>212253921
don't worry in a few years you can rent a flat that's just as bad but costs twice as much

>>212253966
they look irish though
I know households headed by irish names have only 3/4 of the wealth of english ones in the UK

>>212253897
Could have a kitchen knife there instead totally legal bro.
Meanwhile you could have a gun
Clownworld innit

Rorke cookin rock in the traphouse

>>212253950
The same, 30 pounds didnt change it

>>212253966
they look irish

>>212253956
her fans all seem to be actual children

this olivia rodrigo is godawful

Visited Bangor high street today.

I remember going out on family days out to Bangor when I was younger to go shopping. Granted it’s been going this way for years but I was quite shocked to see it today. Absotlely dead and quite dirty. Saw more down and outs shouting at each other than there were open shops. Most of them shops were either vape shops or mobile phone repairs. Gwynedd council should be ashamed of how it’s gone.

Deiniol has two open shops, Claire’s, which was booked for a private party and the phone shop. JD sports was the only shop open really and filled with chav clothes and playing drill music.

>>212254002
shut up you fucking cretin

>>212253974
It's really outrageous how much they charge, yet somehow it's still cheaper than living private

>>212253956
i wish haha
right guys

just finished watching Blue Is the Warmest Colour (2013)
i found it surprisingly engaging, wasn't expecting to like it
extremely erotic, but also tender
i generally don't like French films and Lea Seydoux usually irritates me but I quite liked her in this

>imagine how good olivia rodrigo would look with a jungle bbc down her throat
corr spaff

>>212254036
irish, half paki-irish, irish

>>212253956
She is wearing a dress and sitting in front of a piano

britain is an utter dystopia

>>212254074
That’ll be it, it’s very short

>>212253997
aren't they dead

honestly think i could make it in stand up comedy if i gave it an earnest shot
very witty and clever me

who's even the singer for prodigy now

>le wacky black man screaming the same 4 words inbetween repetitive loud electronic music
prodigy are obnoxious

This photo doesn't look old yet the kid on the right died last year aged 28

>>212254081
irish diaspora are to blame

poos line is it anyway

>>212254043
blame the uni not the council they are broke so they import billions of indian “students” to try and raise cash

Well, good for you, you look happy and healthy
Not me, if you ever cared to ask
Good for you, you're doing great out there without me, baby
God, I wish that I could do that
I've lost my mind, I've spent the night
Crying on the floor of my bathroom
But you're so unaffected, I really don't get it
But I guess good for you

>>212254096

>>212254111
me

>>212254116
this
take them back now, all 30 million of them
only pure anglos should live here

>>212254081
>go rural
>disconnect from the internet
90% of your problems are solved just have to worry about money

>>212254111
gary barlow

Carlybender crying over lyrics written for and by teenage girls again

Well, I were there myself...

>>212254148
just another dumb slag off the production line
vapid nonsense for silly teenagers

>>212254103
Just Keith

>>212254148
cor yep she'd get it

>>212254148
Yeah that’ll be it

Oh she's starting to really slag it up now

>>212245828
maybe heatherfreak is right about irish people

Leftypol screaming 'death to the IDF' with his mates
Rorke sucking off Trump while he sucks off Bibi

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zr7e5tu2Afo

Not illegal to open your door naked to the delivery fella. I’ve checked. Just putting that out there for everyone.

Does anyone have that picture of Olivia Rodrigo in which you see her body hair
Properly grim

mad how prodigy man roped himself

Mad Charli is losing the slag battle to this girl

>>212254168
are you the one from yorkshire
where's your flag? x

>>212254189
I am indeed right about them

Freedom.

oh you're all watching glastonbury again

had yet another night of several women eyeing me up but me being too scared and clueless to initiate anything last night :)
wonder how much longer this can go on

>>212254218
why he was clearly insane for decades

>>212254236
you should still kill yourself asap for the better of society
and i mean that without a shred of irony

>>212254226
yeah charli's outfit was very underwhelming compared to the past

Guys like this cannot date white girls since the 2000s

why is this paedo freak taking screenshots of child audience members

>>212254226
charli has the natural slag aesthetic though, this bird is simply playing the character are charli does it for the love of the game

Hello, I am sorry to bother you.

>>212254114
yeah the kid is shopped in, look at his outline against his father and he's not tensed up enough proportional to how much his father is gripping him, liquify tool has clearly been used on his hip where the father's arm wraps around him

no one enjoying the jorja smith sex arse on woodsies?

>>212254269
heatherpaedo

>>212254280
It's true zoomer slags all do it for cameras they don't have the true slag culture in their blood

>>212254288
>fucking autocue

>>212254243
no I'm watching flamengo vs bayern munich
keep getting on the /brit/ to chat about /brit/ish life but some lad just sperged out at me for saying irish surname households have only 75% of the wealth of those with english surnames
not racist, just what the study said

>>212254214
Tasteless pleb
>212254248
Have you tried 6 or 7 drinks?

>>212254299
me in the middle with the bowl cut and sunnies

>>212254296
Edward James Olmos?

Agreen.

>>212254268
would lifting have saved him?

>>212254329
looks more like a rick moranis/gaddafi lovechild

>>212253970
For me it's this

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NeQM1c-XCDc&t=59

When you think about it, it's kind of crazy how women aren't scared about giving birth. I mean I know it's a natural process and all, but given how painful it's said to be you'd think there'd be more 'anxiety' over the process

The leader.

>>212254359
it's not that painful

>>212254359
that's because they stopped having children and went on birth control permanently

creepy

>>212254359
not that bad, they have drugs that numb you from the waist down

>>212254333
Lmao no
You can't thicken the neck and coon fists are as hard as rocks
He never stood a chance

>>212254359
>>212254382
>torn arsehole
>usually shit yourself
>temporary/permanent incontinence
>risk of fatal blood loss

hmm

proper nice set of legs on this olivia rodrigo bird

>>212254369
good english yeoman's face that

>>212254359
Remember asking my sister when we were young if she was afraid about the pain of childbirth and she just shrugged and said no
Although she's 32 now and childless now

ngl this music isn't doing much for me

>>212254414
>You can't thicken the neck
deary me

>>212254359
mad how they do a poo at the same time the baby comes out

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3O1X8sRYnnI

>>212254425
don't threaten me with a good time, sistah

I squat on the toilet
I'm white

>>212254369
>>212254430
completely right, someone who looks like this could only be from britain, or new zealand

>>212254382
>>212254395
That's probably a recent thing, but even in the past you didn't hear of women fearing giving birth

>>212254439
this whole activity looks so alien to me

>>212254333
1 pack of marlboro reds per day and a daily diet of mcdonalds would have made him an aryan beast

>this was a breakfast tv presenter in the 90s
um rorke?

>>212254439
is that from that virgin island show? so awkward that

>>212254414
DYEL omdz

heard you want her hymen back
ha, shut the fuck up
heard you want her hymen back
nuh uh you can't have that

>You can't thicken the neck

>>212254466
is that lady di

mad all of that stuff that happened in the 70s they never tell anyone about

>>212254430
Yep
We need a class of warrior-workers

>>212254486
lmao

Olivia Rodrigo brought out Robert Smith
Scenes if she brings out Morrissey next

>>212254434
See what I mean
They're not scared of it
I think if a man put himself in the mind of a woman about to give birth, the first thing he would think of/worry about would be the pain

>>212254414
why do you talk so confidently when you’re so wrong

>>212254507
morirssey is too based, robert smith as a person is a fag even though his music is good

>>212254466
back then it was just a laugh

>>212254508

what's the point of getting a phone on contract

>>212254481
LOL Bob Vylan tekkin mad groupie hymens one after the other
-2s

>>212254508
sad to know these two euroslags will have grim feet and bunions

Off to bed lads.

Hail Europe, hail our people, hail Victory.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=82yH5rykxgQ

>>212254509
you're an idiot

>>212254439
perfidious Albion at it again

>>212254539
Build credit

Are you good?

Just a heads up, lads, Olivia Rodrigo just said she loves English boys. Maybe Deegs wants to know.

>>212254532
>>212254508

>>212254359
I think hollywood has somewhat exaggerated this, not to say it's uncommon for it to be painful but I can't be arsed looking it up right now

>>212254543

just need harry kane to assist and im 50 quid up

>>212254526
I read gymcels saying they transformed their bodies but their necks stayed the same width
I guess it would be possible to widen it *slightly* but you'd need to dangerous neck pull up exercises that the average normie isn't going to attempt

boomer rockers sure seem to love her and Billie

>>212254439
what on earth is this programme?

>>212254209
https://youtu.be/OpK8b6376eo?feature=shared&t=3

ooooh yeah

>>212254574
2 of them are really pretty

>>212254581
you can train your neck it's just most people skip it
doesn't prove you right at all

>>212254451
was asked by the midwife to have a look when are bairn was born and yes there was poo coming out of her arse

Sure this olivia rodrigo is a great artist but who actually goes to a music festival hyped to see this?

>>212254574
the tanline has redeemed them but you need a close up to realise how grim fitgirls' feet are
saw a peng one earlier today with nice feet and perfect painted nails but then her big toe nail had come off and it was like a crinkly slice of beetroot

>>212254574
cute

Back from holiday and haven't wanked in 4 days. Needless to say I'm sat at the computer with my boxers around my ankles.

>he doesn't train neck
ngmi

>>212254574
Belgian has perfect legs and rump

>>212254581
>I read gymcels saying they transformed their bodies but their necks stayed the same width
Because they didn’t train their neck therefore it didn’t grow.
There’s safe ways to grow your neck you don’t have to do Mike Tyson shit

>>212254569
women often say that childbirth is the worst pain they've ever experienced. They could collectively be lying about this but I doubt it.

>>212254617
Prodigy are showing right now what people go to festivals for.

Harry Kane, 5PM in Miami.

>>212254610
alri hull lad

>>212254624
To emma i presume?

>>212254629

>>212254624
Where did you go?

warm tomorrow

>Heat bomb explodes in Europe: England could hit a record temperature for June on Monday as continent swelters in 42C 'heat dome'

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-14858199/heatwave-europe-uk-weather-greece-rome.html

>>212254635
Totally understandable. Reckon it's like passing a humongous kidney stone.

so iplayer is a state-run streaming service

I switched to Prodigy
the other one was too boring

>>212254466
Drag queens have been part of British variety show culture for decades. Difference then and now is they were never demonic pedos demanding to read books to children. It was just bitchy queens in womens clothes singing and some double innuendos

>>212254663
Yes and the best part is it's FREE

>heat bomb

>>212254651
No, gymnastics slags.
>>212254656
Orlando, Florida.

>>212254652
h-hot

how long would I have to sit in the son to tan my top half if it’s literally white as milk

Show me a before and after of a white guy whose neck has grown after training

>>212254662
'child' comes from the proto-germanic for 'kidney boulder'

>>212254645
not a chance pal

>>212254658
I'll pray for the zoomzooms in exam halls during this

>>212254663
yeah it's got Inside No. 9 on it
and.... yeah

>>212254694
Stay pale king

>>212254684
E.P.C.O.T?

>>212254636
probably performance of the weekend from what i've seen
mad how you can be that old and have that much more energy

>>212254658
solar jihadists plotting a heat bomb attack on the uk
mi5 must intervene

don't play Friday I'm in love on a sunday night you cunt

Seville is 32C right now lol at almost midnight

>>212254712
Nah I look grim

>>212254705
haven't seen any of them am i missing out

>>212254698
From Middle English child, from Old English ċild, from Proto-West Germanic *kilþ, *kelþ, from Proto-Germanic *kelþaz (“womb; fetus”), from Proto-Indo-European *ǵelt- (“womb”), perhaps from Proto-Indo-European *gel- (“to ball up, amass”).

not a million miles off to be fair

>>212254662
I wonder if nature somehow deactivates their fear of it

>>212254714
Epic Universe, which is shite.

>>212254677
>>212254711
isn't it pretty old though? it must have been neat when it came out at least

>>212254677
are you saying you simply clicked 'yes, I have a tv licence?' anon that's insane!

>>212254677
not really though is it

hate cunts who say you'll miss the warm weather when it's cold again
no I wont I never do can't wait for autumn

Zionists in the UK are using the police to intimidate political opponents

lmao

>>212254722
death to you
life for your oranges

wonder what the internet was like in the late 90s when 95% of people never used it and third worlders barely knew it existed

>>212254722
Seville is the cauldron of Europe
I check the temperatures there every summer and they're always ridiculous

>>212254760
dark helmet?

are they censoring out the word bitch?

>>212254773
think of all the spanish girls with moist hairy clefts

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pf8oA6_mH4c
comfy

Let's do a check here
Are we all sitting in only our boxers?
In this heat I never wear tshirts or bottoms inside the house

kids probably think robert smith is a tranny

1984

>>212254722
literally 44c outside where i am right now

>>212254771
Slow.

I remember seeing smack my bitch up on tv as a kid lol mad they got away with that video

>>212254771
it was more like 4chan than anything else

>>212253775 (OP)
Anyone else fleeing London? Going to Cornwall so I don't have to suffer through the unconditioned 35 degrees

>>212254819
Impressive, but what's the temp inside with air con?

is every olivia rodrigo fan hot

>>212254809
pair of neon green shorts and a pink shirt

When you come to, I will be there, there to whisper, love in your ears. And ten times I must have told you and in love, life, love. If you come to I will be there, here to show you how much I care. More than ten times, I have told you how much love I, I care.

do the harlem shake

>>212254759
Well if you’re about to leave the country they aren’t going to send you a letter are they
>tactical gear
It’s an airport they’re just going to send the officers they’ve got walking about since they do fuck all anyway

>>212254812
obviously he's not but this song has some subtexts
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MI0a9hTh5AU

>>212254759
zionism is truly evil

>>212254799
yeah, there's kids in the audience
it's a lot worse than "death to the idf"

>>212254760
hes been there all day was at pinkpantheress on friday

>>212254839
a very nice 25c but if i go outside for any length of time i basically turn sick due to the difference
can't do anything before 6pm without burning my hands on my steering wheel or anything metal either

>>212254809
jeans and a t-shirt
i have naturally excellent thermoregulation

>>212254771
always been full of virgin freaks

>>212254746
probably but I was doing my GCSEs when it came out
only used it to watch Inside No. 9, don't think there's anything else worth watching on it 2bh

>>212254809
its really not that warm

>>212254800
Salty, doughy, and yeasty, with a light crust...

>>212254819
Phoenix?

>>212254809
got only my boxers on but I am very very fat

>>212254540
mmhmm aint dat rite x

>>212254870
There's a witty response here but I can't think of one

>>212254809
I'm completely naked stuck to my bed with sweat

>>212254864
sent those nintendrones flying

ngl I forgot how great Prodigy are

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ik2YF05iX2w

>>212254889
yeh

Sir bulbous carelessly hurling down -4

>>212253852
>>212253910
>>212253919
>>212253833

>>212254800
disgusting
imagine those sweaty underboobs

kneecap is the greatest band in europe rn

>>212254890
Let's get them off, and then let's get you off in the shower then mate.

Right….

>>212254922
Why the fuck was a city built there?

>>212254434
I can help with that

>>212254866
doctor who
mastermind
university challenge
the other quiz shows i can't remember

bliming eck lad s I AM QUITE WARM IM NOT GOING TO LIE

>>212254771
i used AOL chatrooms

-4 tek dat tek dat mmhmm violence tek place rn

If it weren't for screen addiction I would known world wide as saviour of the white race and western civilisation

>>212254758
dw my brother.. the cold dark night will envelop us again in the cold winter... where our inner fire will keep us comfy while the weak suffer

>>212254926
ubermensch physique

>>212254901
Just butter them toasty buns and dive in, Nige!

wonder how many knobs olivia has sucked

Temperatures in Shetland in the coming days
It's basically late autumn all year round

going to be laid off quite soon

Spanish women are much more disappointing looking than they should be

14 onyx slowly violating -4

>>212254800

>>212254706
Exams are over lad

>i used AOL chatrooms

just want to die under the shade of big tree
a big english tree before a big english field
also a bit drunk

Mental how old some of you are

i need a change of scene

>>212254950
it was quite desolate before air conditioning was commonly available

>>212254926
scream

get the gravy made

>>212254990
read they put her in jail for being a nazi

>>212254960
me too. imagine if we bantered each other 25 years ago and here we are now

>>212254819
yeah in the middle of the day
how is that relevant

>>212254986
work in the hairy men gay porn industry do you? being gay is going out of fashion most modern degenerates are into trannies and traps and its spreading like wildfire

>>212254986
Will you get some redundancy pay :(

>>212254809
Shorts and a t-shirt for me

>>212254868
Very true. A lot of Brits are just whiners when it gets even a little bit warm.

>>212254997
kek

seen this madman run rings around alan brazil on talksport

>>212254968
I wish I was joking when I tell you that I'm way closer to this than I'd like.

>boo hoo women poo when they give birth
oh yeah? I poo every day, big deal

Sitting completely naked on my bed

>>212255007
still got AOL modems in me house

>>212254960
I used teenspot
Got pussy on there and countless cam2cam with girls

>>212254986
I’m sorry

>>212254983
lush

>>212255012
Still mad even with air con isnt it the fastest growing city and youre running out of water too?

>>212255016
katy’s face rn

old people need to put their legs away no one wants to see that shit

>>212254986
30% of staff at my toil going soon, wouldn't mind being paid to leave pretty fed up of the place

>>212254940
Rorke once again seething, just like he does every single day

>>212255049
refuse to believe this

>>212253764
>>212253764
>>212253764

bit sad how jealous some chinese get about europe
like they actually think european history is made up because roman art was more advanced than chinese art at the same date

>>212255033
Your humidity's terrible. Sure it's only high 20's - mid 30's, but you're being steamed in heavy air the whole time.

>>212254296

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H_Nc-zjRmK4

doing the toilfus skinny body on the body visualiser

Quite sad seeing the prodigy without keith desu

>>212255058
california is the state that is running out of water, not us
we get it all from the colorado river nearby

mad how europeans are the midpoint between africans and asians

>>212255086
ToT

>>212255039
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AHMZgCB57Q8

;)

>>212254940

NEW (Post-310)

>>212255127
>>212255127
>>212255127

>>212255078
Not in yorkshire mate, the high hills of the pennines dump all that atlantic water on lanc*shire

>>212255007
starting using the chon in 2008
and they want to take it away from me

>Bodies with a BMI of under 17.5 are not visualized

wtf
discrimination