Thread 212940339

>>212940339 (OP)
ummm sexo

>>212940319
>They melt when given a pink lighter
shoot I've got a handful of pink lighters from those 5 packs you get at walmart. you're saying if a nigga asks to bum a smoke I better not let him borrow my pink lighter?

Kids these days with their Zendayas, their Sydney Sweeneys, their Jenna Ortegas, their Mikey Madisons, their Elle Fanning's, their Sabrina Carpenters, their Ella Purnels.
Why, back in my day, we had actresses like Phoebe Cates, Brooke Shields, Jennifer Jason Leigh, Alyssa Milano, Pamela Anderson, Jennifer Aniston, Jessica Alba, and Scarlett Johansson.

>>212940455
There are lots of videos of nwords having a meltdown when handed a pink lighter by a store clerk, when they just ask for a lighter. It’s because they don’t want to be caught dead owning a pink lighter. If they’re just asking for a light off of your lighter, and it’s revealed to be pink, they’d probably just think you’re a homo

i dont have a father

>>212940561
So you're a product of immaculate conception?

>>212940598
my father left when i was a year old

>>212940521
But testosterone levels are declining. Young men have the testosterone level of a 70 year old man from the 70s

how is the new nintendo switch 2? planning to buy for my kid

Only 1 in 5 American men will make it to the age of 85

>>212940598
he's melinated

>>212940559
damn ok well shoot. I don't live around negroes so it's never been a thing I was aware of. nobody's ever said anything about my lighter before tho

>>212940695
that's a curse to live so long

>>212940715
>he owns a pink lighter
Ayo this dude is ZESTY

>>212940695
dont wish to make it till 30

>>212940671
patiently waiting for a new zelda

Pickle?! Nah man!

>>212940339 (OP)
women really be out there… looking like women… preposterous!

>>212940750
we got one last year

I turned myself into Pickle Dick, Morty!

>>212940730
It depends
Look how happy Dick van Dyke is, and he's 99

>>212940750
but what are the new stuff or tech it brings?

took a slightly too large dose of pre-workout

>>212940339 (OP)
Lina Santos?

>>212940790
i mean like a new open world 3d zelda. echos of wisdom was cool tho

>>212940826
its the equivalent of PS4 pro, whereas switch one was.....I think a PS3?

>>212940833
Did you have to rush to the terlit

>>212940732
damn shit I've been found out next thing imma be cruising the gay bars or something

>>212940844
open world zelda sucks ass tho

>>212940695
can't think of anyone relevant over the age of 70 besides braindead politicians who are clearly too old for the job

>>212940862
nope, it’s just too much caffeine, worried about my veins ‘n sheit

>>212940811
still a curse

>>212940890
tobin bell is 82

>>212940886
i like em

>>212940900
A dose of caffeine usually causes an expedited poopoo…

I have an almost constant minor tingling in my left foot and it’s driving me insane. It’s not a painful tingling like you get with you compress a nerve. Completely painless and so faint I sometimes wonder if I’m imagining it

Drinking coffee

>>212940962
I already pooped a lot today because I ate something spicy yesterday, maybeit I shall poop more later

>>212941090
White bros, how do we recover from this

>>212940645
What did you do to make him leave

Majora's Mask was the best Zelda game because it didn't have Zelda and rescuing w*men is a meme

Which wife would you want? They're all considered 8/10 in attractiveness, won't cheat on you, and will remain with you as long as you satisfy them.
>White woman. She has a good job and doesn't mind you being a house husband but she has strong feminist values and is worthless around the house. Sex is a bore.
>Black woman. The sex is phenomenal, she's willing to do anything and doesn't care about her own satisfaction. But she cooks unhealthy slop, refuses to get a fulltime job and her homemaking skills are minimal
>Latina. Great cook, work ethic and home making skills. But she's very needy. Needs to be treated like a princess and orgasm regularly or she goes ballistic and starts hitting/destroying things. She also likes to push your buttons on purpose to test you
>East Asian. She's practically perfect in every way. Assimilates to your preferences in sex, video games, movies etc. But she's extremely demanding and will bitch you to death if she feels like you're lazy, haven't gotten a raise or worked any overtime lately, or spending your money frivolously. She also expects you to give money to her parents to support them.
>Jeeta. She's submissive and smart and trad. She a skilled and healthy cook but only makes Indian dishes. Her parents are rich and generous and will do whatever is necessary for you and her to succeed. But she's a devout Hindu and raising your kids in the Hindu faith is uncompromisable. She also has a large extended family running the gamut from engineers to gurus to street shitters, and one or two of them will have to stay in your homes guest room a couple of times per year for 7 to 30 days.

>>212941131
Does link even become canon prince in any of the games for rescuing her

It starts with a pink lighter.
Before you know it you're blowing random strangers in the men's room gloryhole at the local park

>>212941139
I know what you are...

>>212941090
spicy in, spicy out

>>212941126
i was and still am an abomination. also evil

>>212941131
i think the music in majora is better than ocarina

>>212941131
twilight princess clears MM easily

>>212940671
DK Bananza looks fun
I've been watching Dashie play it

>>212941178
Say it

>>212941139
White, not even a contest

>>212941139
I’m a stone cold incel, at this point I can barely even conceive of the warm touch of a female

Used to always get gay looking lighters so no one would pocket them

Works like a charm

>>212941218
Need to nerf that option

>>212941177
THE LIGHTER TURNED THE NIGGAS GAY

>>212941273
exactly. even his mom hated me

>>212941226
>

>>212941226
Do you remember your first blowjob?

>>212941316
yah, your mom's knees were pretty dirty afterwards

>>212941339
GOTTEM

watching leftists shit on nationalism for years and then suddenly orange man starts bad mouthing canada and suddenly the leftoids have discovered patriotism again is the cringiest shit
imagine being so cucked to be proud of your hindu maple leaf

>>212941308
got his ass

>>212941308
Basically yeah

Ironically I stole a Maroon 5 lighter from a friend and that one was always returned to me lol

>>212941316
Funnily enough no I don't

>>212941339
>Yeah
How long did it take for the guy to cum

Going on my compooter

>>212941363
weird people over there in Canada

i used to be a manly man he hulk arnold schwarzenegger motha fugga but then I touched a pink lighter once and now I look like picrel

Family guy is so cringe
>What if we... Get this... What if we dress the talking dog into a banana suit and make him sing peanut butter jelly time?! Wouldn't that be sooo random and le funny?!

>>212941363
The Liberals and their Boomer hordes are not leftists

>>212941412
PEANUT BUTTER JELLO CLOCK!

me when canada

>>212941460
>muh democrats arent real leftist only communism is true leftoidism
redditleaf...

ruh roh they're onto you canucks

>>212941456
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PD-7WA7AHww&pp=ygUKZmFtaWx5IGd1eQ%3D%3D

>>212941199
Zhant was best villain

high af on a saturday afternoon gonna watch a ww2 movie

>>212941631
>ww2 movie
which?

exercising just makes me feel like dogshit

Just found the steal of a lifetime on FB marketplace

>>212941631
I fell asleep after taking a huge edible last night and had a series of tony soprano-esque dreams
>driving in the middle of nowhere with my dad and we have to change a tire
>at a flea market as a kid and an old friend who died was there
>driving a taxi and letting different people I know in and out

>>212941663
Exercising itself feels good for me, but then afterwards i get hit with tiredness and low mood

>>212941450
no man or boy can ever possibly look like that

>>212941650
idk haven't decided yet maybe
Empire of the Sun

>>212941734
a boy could easily look like that but then you're a pedo

>>212941758
big red one is really good

>>212941688
Always baffles me the stuff people list on fb marketplace
Like why even list that? Just throw it away

>>212941663
what exercises do you do?

>>212941794
nah, not even, without any kind of hormones or whatever, none can look like that

>>212941830
curls and crunches

>>212941899
how long have you been keeping this routine up?

I bet the Brazilian poster is handsome

>>212941908
at least the "are femboys gay" meme has died out

>>212941963
I think he's more cute than handsome

Penis rights are human rights. Every penis including my own deserves sexual gratification

>>212941984
>at least the "are femboys gay" meme has died out
what was the final verdict

My entire digestive system decided to evacuate
I feel like a tube of toothpaste squeezed from the middle

>>212941963
He's a manlet and has brown skin.

i think hes disgusting given all those incel and woman hate post

>>212942038
its fucking stupid faggot gay and mentally ill. they think they look like those fetish drawings posted online but their porn addiction and extremely unhealthy internet exposure has warped their mind.

>>212940339 (OP)
What the fuck does hr do thats do important?

ate something expired

>>212942137
women are the gatekeepers of employment and sex

Our enemies aren’t bound, as we are, by the laws of physics and mathematics. Colbert’s show lost $40m a year against an annual spend of $100m. More money is always found to prop up their rancid failures and tragic unpopularity.

>>212942152
that's how the bubonic plague started, by eating expired tuna cans and sugarless coke

cheezits have gone stale

its over...

why are niggas moving out of cities
we must stop this

>>212942402
Crime and taxes

>>212942340
dumbass

>>212942402
obviously because of the [REMOVED FOR RACISM]

>>212942419
OH NO OH NO STINKY CALIPOORNIA

>>212942415
grow up white boy

>>212941565
He's right though genuine leftists are pretty rare these days, even ones who consider themselves communist are just radical libtards. Actual tankies are considered crypto fash chuds by those people.

>>212942448
if more people leave, I may finally be able to afford rent

Definitely killing myself if I don't have a wife by 35

They're on the 'tok saying men who use the elliptical are jasonkin :/

>>212942539
i genuinely dont get it

https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=5LV70mRhkrw&si=acZAKLlZylGGFYZy

>>212942599
brainlet

>>212942599
modern commies are all lgbtqiaap
humour is derived from placing the modern day commies into the birth of communism during the Russian Revolution in 1917 (and assassinatin of the royal family in 1918)

A whole world exists outside your borders you know.

Picked up Bioshock for the ps3 at the pawn shop

tired of womemes, buncha whores

>>212942640
for the PS3? what year is it

>>212942630
I look like this

>bioSHIT
play System shock like a REAL gamer

>>212942668
you do not

>>212942539
I think this is it

>>212942448
How's the power grid going, Texas?

>>212942630
God I wish I could look something like that, but with a cock.

>>212942690
>KEKffy

nothing makes you look older than balding, bro can look 18 one year and then look 40 the next because he went bald

>>212942638
All it took was fag shit, feminism, and affirmative action to completely defang the Left and render it harmless to Capitalism. Pathetic to be quite honest.

>>212942739
I live in VIRGIN(ia)

just gonna jerk off a second time and call it saturday.
would have gladly downed these last two cans of lager but stomach is very upset rn

My fucking friend killed himself because White people are being ethnically cleansed. Think about that next time you joke about BBC.

white bois literally kill themselves over BBC

>>212942751
if you looked like that you would have no need for a cock...

>>212942690
The art style for One Piece and many other animes is so fucking ugly, how can you guys watch this shit?
Full Metal Alchemist doesn't have ugly animation, and neither do any Studio Ghibli movies

>>212942788
I misread this as baking like damn what's wrong with some sourdough

feeling a lil eepy so I took a lil nap

>>212942806
>>212942822
When did the far-right adopt this condescending shitlib tone? Is it because of Twitter? It seems like I see things like this every day now.

i look like this

>>212942806
>>212942822
are we being raided by /lgbt/

>>212942822
it's not fucking funny

>>212942839
Seeing cinnamoroll makes me panic and I don't understand why. Something about this cute creature being turned into a product gives me the heebie jeebies

>>212942662
Every nigga says this until their oneitis says, "hey, anon!"

>>212942822
shouldn't he not killed himself if that was what he was worried about? just doesn't make sense does it?

>>212942863
shit libs pretending to be right wing

I think the internet ruined America

>>212942894
obvious fake story though

>>212942790
I'm a bit of a rightoid myself but sometimes when I see the tactics they use it almost feels like a right-wing psyop with how stupid they are.
A mass cheap supply of labour has existed since we were neanderthals. First through slavery, then through serfdom, and when the plague wiped out 1/3 of England in the 14th century Edward III passed the Statute of Labourers in 1351 to try and keep serfs in their place because suddenly they became far more valuable as there was less supply to go around. That's where wages really began. Then as serfdom gradually declined, conveniently the age of discovery commenced and black slaves could take their place. Then as soon as slavery became condemned mass migration commenced first through Euros to the new world, then everyone else post-WW2.
And yet the left support it because they've been brainwashed into thinking mass migration is a leftoid virtue.

If they dropped this one thing (and soft on crime) they could completely handicap the right but they refuse to do so.
It almost makes me angry how stupid they are.

>>212942946
just microwave it for a minute or two
stop being a puss puss

>>212942886
Absolutely horrendous webm

amazon fresh is 2 stops away

there had to be a moment when I still had the possibility to make things different back then. it depended on wether or not my awareness could recognize the emergency of things and lead me to action.
there had to be a moment like that.
can't remember it, can't tell when but I feel it. and perhaps that's the true horror

>>212942885
she’s also a vampire, VERY scary

>>212943019
She?!

>>212942945
>If they dropped this one thing (and soft on crime) they could completely handicap the right but they refuse to do so.
>It almost makes me angry how stupid they are.
They need to drop the LGBT stuff to

>>212942946
there's no coming back from this. just go to bed and try again tomorrow.

>>212943019
Cinnamoroll is a boy

>>212942801
Why don't you spend the evening at a betting shop or shisha bar with your cousins?

just learned there are no good cock lengthening surgeries as of yet and many have high failure rates, this could be a eureka moment for whomever cracks the secret to big dicks

>>212943010
bezo's goodest goy

>>212943033
Cinnamoroll is a boy?! This changes everything…

>>212943066
>cock lengthening surgeries
I'm fine with my 5 inch cock, no girl has ever complained. It helps that I also have a tongue

>>212942945
>If they dropped this one thing (and soft on crime) they could completely handicap the right but they refuse to do so.
Umm sweaty if you’re a leftist who’s a nationalist, that’s NATIONAL SOCIALISM and you’re LITERALLY HITLER who is SECULAR SATAN in the BOOMER TRUTH

the extent of my male experience goes as far as doing things against my will for money
masturbating and whoremongering
consuming

>>212943066
guys would all end up with huge frankencocks getting bigger and bigger and women wouldn't be able to deal with it

>>212942824
What do you mean? Why would I have no need for a cock? I like having one.

>>212943036
yes that's 3rd
but trans 10000x more than gays
I think gays are still 60-40 accepted, perhaps even 70-30.
Only declined in the past few years because the trannards are making them catch strays via association.

>>212943058
why dont you eat shit and get pissed on and come up with autistic philosophical systems nobody gives a fuck about

FARTY DICK SHART

Haha, I love when footkraut banters other European flags

Yea, I’m thinking billions must die

triggered the Nafri again award

>>212942945
Yeah the entire political theater is just designed to keep anything resembling National Socialism in the loose sense from ever forming.
Gatekeep any nationalist ideas or social conservativism on the Left and gatekeep any Anti-Capitalist sentiment on the Right.

>>212943179
you like having a cock because you are a MALE, but if you looked like her, you would be a FEMALE and have no use for a cock outside of curiousity

>>212942728
Third panel left epaulet

>>212942900
Making fake twitter accounts is more of a Nordic as fuck Prussian-German ethnicity kind of thing desu

just end the entire human race

>>212943352
X to doubt

National Soycialism

>>212943365
There's like a million fake shitlib accounts on twitter. Go take a look.

anyway as I was saying.
im suffering

>>212942900
The quartering talks like this, was he pretending to be right wing before or after he crashed his career and marriage over MAGA?

>>212943328
I understand. The issue here is communication. Okay, you see, I want to have a female body, but with male genitalia. Capito?

>>212943466
ok but you might as well want to be a unicorn

'member when this Separdic Jewish woman from France was posting in /cum/? Sadly, you guys have scared her away with your antisemitism.

>>212943497
The only good one is a dead one!

>>212943490
Why would I want to be a horsie with a horn? I want to be human. You are weird.

>>212943497
>Sadly, you guys have scared her away with your antisemitism.
umm based.

>>212943534
point being you can't be a girl with a penis, it doesn't exist!

>>212942864
With a penis?

You guys being faggots scared away all the cats with homophobia </3

>>212943661
In-group good, out-group bad. Very easy and simple to understand.

>>212943738
cats with homophobia would hunt down faggots would they not

>>212943772
Depends on the cat

>>212943652
Science needs to speed the heck up. My kind are in heavy demand, but never delivered because Sciburg is WAY TOO SLOW!

that one made janny's fee fees hurt

pants: removed
liberals? owned

>>212943809
it does actually make me wonder: once science can make a completely realistic female body just with a penis how many "men" would gladly accept that role

>>212943936
Just blasted my libtard toilet with shit!!

It's funny how in 2020 they said that mean white girls you went to high school with become nurses when the truth is they got meme degrees in psychology and then worked in HR or event planning

high rn

>>212944130
were these girls "mean" because they wouldn't sleep with your short, brown ass?

>>212944178
I'm jealous

>gooning to women
god I love women!!!
>talking to women
god I hate women!!!

>>212944189
No they ignored me but in general they were mean to other people

>>212944215
why is everett so fat

>>212944008
Don'know, don'care. In another life, if the success rate is high, I will take my chance. Unless, a third gender is materialised. Now that would be interesting.

>>212944204
Yeh women should have their vocal cords ripped out and just left to exist as objects to be stared at unironically

>>212944215
I don't smoke I buy thc drinks they're stronger than smoking but less strong than a regular edible and they're nice

>>212944215
I wish I belonged to a club. Sometimes all I wanna do is sit down in an armchair and read the newspaper.

>>212944248
Go away

>>212944275
My roommate gave me on of these drinks but I didn't drink it
I'm afraid weed would make me retarded so I stick to alcohol

>>212944316
Weed makes you schizophrenic, homosexual, and worsens your memory, but doesn’t make you retarded

>>212944343
so it makes you retarded.

>>212944316
I think they're fine if you want to try them out, they hit within 15 minutes so its easy to portion out if you just pour it in a glass to see how much you've drank

>>212944232
he's a Norfman

>>212944283
nothings topping you from subscribing to a newspaper and investing in a chair

>>212944248
>Unless, a third gender is materialised. Now that would be interesting.
I used to fantasize about that a lot. wrote huge back stories to it too

Is it too much to ask for that a woman farts on my nuts while we fuck?

>>212944426
I need a place to get away from my bitch wife

>>212944465
your wife wouldn't be a bitch if you spanked her properly like you're supposed to

>>212943682
yes

Unusual roommate behaviour. I believe he had diarrhea several times today. He seems to get tired and is sleeping all day, unusual for him. He even slept on the floor. He looks red and may have a fever and headache. He won't get up and refuses food. I only managed to convince him to have drinks (Gatorade and water). I don't believe it is food poisoning. The only things that changed recently is that my girlfriend and her 2 year old daughter moved into our apartment. He also dyed his hair today but doesn't seem to have an allergic reaction. He did not go outside (weekend).

>>212944427
So did the Hawaiians. It is amazing that we believe some of our thoughts are original, but at some point in time, someone had those same very thoughts.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/M%C4%81h%C5%AB

>>212944534
nigga what also why are you autism

>>212944534
your girlfriend's toddler got him sick you fucking cuck. i can only imagine you subjected him to overcrowded living conditions, with a toddler no less. does your whore gf even pay rent

>>212944547
well yeah cause there's always sissy feminine men around to cause people to wonder what it would be like to have a male/female third gender

I've been to Hollywood
I've been to Redwood
I've been a miner for a heart of gold

Hawaiian beaches are literally imported from Calipoornia

>>212944570
Incels don't get to have high quality gfs. I'm doing this for now to secure my bloodline at any cost necessary.

>>212944714
YOU'RE RAPING HER TODDLER?? WHAT THE FUCK

Already carrying 230 pounds and bench-pressing well over that, Gately clocked a 4.4 40 in 7th grade, and the legend is that the Beverly Middle School coach ran even faster than that into the locker room to jack off over the stopwatch.

I suffer more than your conventional sissy faggot "feminine" man because I want to be the dominant one while being small and weak. I want to have that cretin on a leash and step on it when I'm angry. I like having control.

>>212944248
>Unless, a third gender is materialised
the problem is they couldn't go into female spaces without being locked up because you couldn't trust them otherwise

>>212944793
>cretin on a leash
korn ass

>>212944793
so you want a manly sissy faggot to step on? strange

>>212944860
Waikiki Beach is imported sand

>>212944534
>my girlfriend
>her 2 year old daughter

>>212944937
hahahaha bodied that cuck

overate today not going to like the number on the scale tomorrow

test

what's so bad about being a virgin anyway

The thought of being responsible for a child is terrifying to me 2bh. I couldn't handle the responsibility that goes into caring for and raising a human being.

should i eat chips

should i eat

Imagine having a roommate and then this guy let's a woman with a kid live in your appartment.

Traveling on a budget is actually really easy, you can have wicked 2 week euro trips for like $2000

I guess I had recently changed my oil but forgot about it. This stuff was almost new. What a waste

>>212945161
Change my oil

>>212945145
imagine tolerating that instead of immediately contacting the superintendent and having him jailed and his stepchild placed into foster care

>>212945152
i want to travel to germany and visit foot kraut

The dollar is so weak right now. Not a good time to make a trip to the eurozone.

>>212945181
What do you have

>>212945227
but i want to see you

>>212945152
What about the cost of hotels? That seems like one of the highest costs

>>212945238
I am another German anon. Apart from that, I don't want to see you at all.

I've been to germany

>>212945227
who even cares lol the price of things in europe isn't the problem it's the plane ticket

>>212945286
Go fuck yourself Nazi scum

>>212945161
how do you just forget you changed your oil

>>212945309
Just smuggle yourself aboard a cargo ship

Attractive women don't ask do you wanta fanta? Anymore these days, you ever notice that?

why do women generally have a terrible sense of humor

*duke nukem voice* Listen up shitfuck!

>>212945378
Because people are more willing to call men out for not being funny

duke nukem says trans rights

Disney adults are fags

People that moved to New York to live some Carrie Bradshaw, Joker or Friends fantasy aren't allowed to mock Disney adults

>>212945285
That's why I stay in hostels for $15-$35 a night

german twinks smell like cinnamon rolls

I’m visiting Montreal today for the first time in 8-9 years, there’s so many poojets and chinks now

>>212945343
I don't know, but it takes no time at all and I have to do it so often I don't really think about it. After about 15-20 hours of operation I change it, and that's once or twice a month. It only takes like 20min to change it

American twinks smell like old sweat because they rarely shower.

enough about the goddamn twinks

If Hitler was reborn in the U.S and was running for president would you vote for him?
Keep in mind this American Hitler would turn the U.S into a vassal of Germany and also enact socialistic policies

>>212945285
talk some guy on 4chan into letting you crash the couch

>>212945395
blow it out cher ass

>>212945608
And California would be the vassal of the Japanese Empire.

It's like a jungle sometimes, it makes me wonder how I keep from going under

>>212945659
you'll never see ME bowing to tojo

I'm spiritually brown

new new new new new new new new new new new new new new new new new new new new new new new new new new new new new new new new new new new new new new new new new new

I'm spiritually a woman.

>>212945866
>>212945866
New

>>212945286
are you the guy that was playing guitar and speaking russian on the sharty /cum/ thread

>>212945884
Nope.

>>212945378
ive pondered this at length. its not just "women tend to not be as funny" its literally "women cannot be funny"

Ive never seen a good standup routine from a woman. I cant remember any time a woman has made me intentionally laugh. Logically there must be some exception to the rule given just how many people there are but I have yet to see proof

>>212945555
I showered this morning. First time in 3 days. I get depressed sometimes