Thread 213484707

gay monsky edish

first

Bomb new zealand

slut dog sub edition

>>213484710
why on earth would I want to live in Australia

rorke you know you're a fat cunt,
your life is sad mate, to somebody like me,
come on now, follow my lead,
don't eat a cake after your tea,
cos, boy, let's not pork too much,
flab on your waist, stomach a pudgy fat heap,
come on now, follow my lead,
come, come on now, follow my lead,
mmmmmm...

i'm alarmed by the state of you,
you look awful and have shit shoes,
and though you've tried covering your moobs,
i'm alarmed by your body,
last night you were eating food,
and now your farts all smell like poo,
every day discovering something brand new,
that is wrong with your body,
(oh-i-oh-i-oh-i-oh-i),
i'm alarmed by your body,
(oh-i-oh-i-oh-i-oh-i),
i'm alarmed by your body,
(oh-i-oh-i-oh-i-oh-i),
i'm alarmed by your body,
every day discovering brand new menus,
i'm alarmed by the state of you

me when schizos try to derail threads

new zealand? love them

>>213484707 (OP)
ooer!

aff tae bed

will i look cool smoking cigars at work? i dont want to smoke ciggies because you actually have to inhale but with cigars i get the visual aesthetic while also being able to just blow it all out

don't remember going to the shops yesterday at all but i must've done because there's new groceries and a receipt in a bag from last night on the counter
need to cut back on the benzos

no human predators on new zealand, you could just go feral in the woods there

that poster isn't going to bed btw

>>213484758
hate people who drive trucks, absolutely no need for it and they're dangerous and view-obstructing

haven't made any good posts today

is s1kdrivingoffences legit?

niggas just jealous of our choccy

apply to mensa

bum, takes control of me
i'm stressing with a desperate need
said it's poo, and piss out my dick
messing with my mind, i pace up
straight, down an empty street
find a maccas, asking peeps
"where's the bog?", as i'm turtling
"it's taken me an age to find one"

ah-ah-ah-ah-uh-aah
i tell you i need a poo
ah-ah-ah-ah-uh-aah
i tell you i need a poo

rear-end, takes control of me
farting cross the gallery
all these pills, got to operate
these laxatives are gonna save us
there it goes again
take me to the edge again
all i got, is a dirty trick
i'm stressing that i can't just take a-

ah-ah-ah-ah-uh-aah
i tell you i want a poo
ah-ah-ah-ah-uh-aah
i tell you i need a poo

>>213484802
chuck er in the ute

>>213484815
shit no one's heard of until this post:

>>213484824
indeed, if you've got shit to haul get a ute, not one of these monstrosities

>>213484788
aye cos im aff tae bed ya fucking shitebag

Poo refusing to come out, been drinking a lot of coffee to force it but nothing happening

>>213484818
me? wait for someone else to post their wordle and then get it in one go

Can a monkey really be gay?

>>213484821
ummy

neighbour's dog has been howling all morning, wish it would die and shut up

Greetings

>>213484827
its the best chocolate in the world. If you know you choc, you know whittakers

>>213481515
were*
hypothetical, subjunctive mood

can’t wait for the weekend.
Weed and pizza
God please hurry up with the weekend please
I’m begging
On my knees

>>213484845
yeah they're pretty stupid

>>213484872
begging you get a clue

>>213484872
say you have cancer and you'll get loads of time off

verdict is that rorke's been a crazy dita

>>213484858
got weighed in a tank like this when i was a kid

>>213484833
is a ute like a small truck

Off to Kensington, gonna join the fent leaners

Just woke up

>>213484858
guffawing

we ain't goin' to heaven

australians used to be cool
they liked V8 engines and trucks
now they are just like the faggy yuros with their tiny shitboxes

>>213484901
no it's a sedan with a tray on the back

>>213484929
shut the fuck up you evil kike

>>213484920
Mental how many weasely white nerds I see with ugly chink wives

America First baby.

>>213484925
can I get an id on these

>>213484739
Nice pic

Get the teeth brushed

>>213484929
it's just like in mad max, the cool stuff only happens in the desert, the inhabitants of the heavily populated coast just tries to avoid the outback and the people who live there as much as they can

ur birds gash x

>>213484943
this is fucking gay as hell

>>213484943
Need a gf who loves and supports me as much as USA loves and supports Israel

nigger poop lmao

>>213484929
new zealand still likes v8
australia likes tesla now

dangerous day to be a pillow, hot chocolate and weighted blanky

roll on deodorant is 1000000x better than lynx spray why tf did no one tell me this

>>213484947
that is in fact a bacon sandwich

>>213484929
actually we were never really into trucks, not in the way yanks are, if anything it's yankification that's driven up the rise in truck ownership here

>>213485038
it's common knowledge. also anti-perspirant is better than deodorant

>>213485038
Also not cancer causing

Need him back

>>213485038
doesn't the rolley bit get sweaty poo stank on it

the thing they don’t tell you about losing weight is you have this disgusting fucking loose skin.
you start getting all excited for your holiday and realise you’ll have to keep your top on the entire time, just like you had to do when you were fat.
Bit of a waste of time really

>>213484739
>out of focus
it's rule number ONE

>>213485060
Obviously isn’t if I didn’t know about it.

Better days

what race is this guy he's a model in M&S

>>213485086
took collagen pills during my weight loss this last year and whilst i was constantly stopping and starting the diet i ended up losing 4 stone (14 to 10 @5'7) without having any loose skin at all and having generally better skin and better hair and nails

Timmy

>>213485123
la creatura...

>>213485086
I only ever see that only people that lose like 100kg

>>213485134
Been taking the collagen powder everyday for over 3 months now.
Done fuck all

love how my neighbour has decided to rev his car out my window

>>213485123
Black and Irish

>>213485086
fat isn't strangling your organs and making your heart work triple over time

the new creps

>>213485160
https://i.4cdn.org/gif/1754338610368642.mp4

>>213485154
37kg

I don't see the appeal of women stepping on my knackers with high heels, there's a good chance that the act alone could cause some irreparable damage

>>213485164
3 months is about when i was certain i was going to keep taking it cos the third month was when everything was obviously improving
so maybe keep at it but it could be different strokes etc
cos a lot of people say it's total rubbish but i've been on cheap weightworld ones off amazon and been very pleased

why are drag queens so dead set on accessing spaces for children under the pretence of reading to them?

like why is reading to them such a overpowering motivation

>>213485209
yeah?
https://i.4cdn.org/gif/1754338610368642.mp4

>>213484943
mental that they're resorting to these tactics
it's not that you should support israel because it's the right thing
it's that you will support israel or else

how good of a shag are you in bed? i’ve made the last four women i slept with cum

>>213485188
nice bit like these which i have a pair of

>>213485233
https://i.4cdn.org/gif/1754338610368642.mp4

Never met an Irish in my life. I don’t think they even exist

That'll be Canada filtered then
Vile cunt

>>213485216
give it a rest graham

>>213485233
that's the standard lad, not something to brag about
imagine hearing a girl talk about making a guy cum like it's something she's proud of
bear in mind girls can cum multiple times in one session
good job for achieving it once though

good webm that glad i watched it

>>213485233
Quite good, rave reviews
>>213485251
Im right here

Jews are quite funny I can never really hate them

>>213485038
>lynx
Come on youre not 15

>>213485233
dunno

reckon i'd be a generous and unselfish lover

>>213485298
that's how they get you

>>213485233
Fat girls are more grateful

Thoughts about red flags?

23 centigrade. Too hot

>>213485348
tummy sex erotic

>>213485233
how can you tell they came if they don't tell you?
for me one never said so, but i could feel her moaning heavily for like 5 minutes straight so she must have came
she said she didn't afterwards i just told her to fuck off

>>213485233
started making the gf cum somewhat regularly from penetration after a few months together, but she's still hard to please
but she will always cum from oral/clit

love the whiffs of poo when i shag the bf's hairy arse

>>213485398
corrrr

why didn't mass shooting happen 100 years ago when everyone was walking around with a handgun?

>>213485379
So true

Automation will be great for humanity in the long term

>>213485383
I can get a girl off in under 60 seconds with my fingers

>>213485424
pretty sure they did mate

>>213485424
Can't be arsed to google it but I'm sure there was a school shooting like 100 years ago and until Colombine that was the big one

>>213485306
You really thought you did something there didn’t you

got a naturally big bum and thick legs and i don't even do leg day at all anymore lads, seems like my genes would be better suited to a girl x

>>213485424
zoomers do mass shootings because they won't put in the graft it takes to be a serial killer

>>213485419
RIP king

>>213485424
you're just now noticing that the world's gone mad?

>>213484943
It is strange that they decided to enact this policy the literal same day Israel made it public they’re going to occupy the entirety of Gaza. I’m starting to think the Trump administration and the Netanyahu government might actually be in bed with one another.

>>213485424
took like 12 years to reload matey

>>213485424
August 13, 1903 Winfield massacre: During a concert in Winfield, Kansas, Gilbert Twigg opened fire on the crowd before killing himself. Six people died at the scene, and three later succumbed to their injuries in the hospital. 25 others were injured.[363]

>>213485486
not in 1925, they already had all sorts of modern-ish firearms by then

Update from another day in normieville (toil).

I have come to the comforting conclusion that I am actually not shy one bit. The issue is that I am often silent during normoid conversations because 90% of them comprise regaling other normie shit they did - be it Alton Towers, Concerts, Golf, Travelling. And I am unable to respond in kind with my exhilirating escepades on /brit/.

There in lies the problem lads. We literally "need to get out more".
Otherwise we have no stories to share aside from our trivia.

>>213485507
yeah i solved this problem by lying

HATE living in the suburbs
HATE dog owners
>"ah yes i'll just leave my dog home and let it bark all fucking day"
FUCK OFF

19 For the good that I would I do not: but the evil which I would not, that I do.

20 Now if I do that I would not, it is no more I that do it, but sin that dwelleth in me.

21 I find then a law, that, when I would do good, evil is present with me.

22 For I delight in the law of God after the inward man:

23 But I see another law in my members, warring against the law of my mind, and bringing me into captivity to the law of sin which is in my members.

24 O wretched man that I am! who shall deliver me from the body of this death?

america has this war general yank called custer and all his battles are basically leading hundreds of his men to slaughter against the injuns who were using nothing but bows and arrows and even stolen weapons from him shit is well funny

>>213485455
the earliest one I can think of is the University of Texas tower shooting in 1969

>>213485463
snap your fingers like that at me and i'll spark you out you little bitch. now get me some chips.

>>213485424
Everyone else had a gun?
This is a serious question.

>>213485507
practice here
for example
so how was your weekend what did you get up to?

remember this

>>213485521
but I can't lie when I know nothing about golf or music or specific places abroad

>>213485568
oh you know
just relaxed and chilled
*kills the conversation stone dead*

that was my genuine response today lmao

Guys is it possible to get a virus on iPhone if I download a .epub file

>September 6, 1949 Camden, New Jersey
> 'Walk of Death' Killings by Howard Unruh: The perpetrator walked through his neighborhood for 12 minutes and killed thirteen; including three children, and injured three.[339]
seems unreasonable

>>213485568
Went to an orgy with five men and five women and got no sex

What a time honoured tradition

>>213485533
only know about him from that atari game called custer's revenge where you rape a bunch of squaws

>>213485533
he was only 36 when he died
american officers in the 18th and 19th century were all rich tarqs who bought their rank
experience or skill had nothing to do with it
they like to think they were more egalitarian than britain with it's nobility but they were no different really, maybe even worse

>>213485576
state of that profile picture
says all you need to know

>>213485530
shurrup

>>213485588
You'd have regretted it anyway

>>213485568
got too drunk and kept overstepping boundaries

>>213485590
part and parcel of living on the plains

>>213485590
this is why the indians deserved to be massacred
total. redskin. death

>>213485590
seems silly to group this with colombine etc

>>213485507
ktim
like 90% of conversation is anecdotes and i just dont fuckin have any
also dont know shit about anything they care about and i absolutely despise rambling on about my interests

>>213485568
not much ha ha you?

Firing up the 2600 for a goon sesh

One crashout away from my biggest lock in

Yes, she is

Helicoptering my flaccid cock around to bruce springsteen in my front yard

how do i get good at computers

>>213485568
Ah you know, shopping, some gaming, the usual

>>213485568
went on a little roadtrip, was fun

testosterone shots making my voice deeper, got a sexy little growl now x

armpits stink

Thank you for your attention on this matter!

>>213485588
You should have gone to one with 5 men and 6 women

>>213485491
>it would have been much better for me if I had gotten married and settled down as you have done—I have no doubt that you are very happy, while I am not.
The original incel

Cor

>>213485773
*shoves my face in them and licks them clean*

>>213485745
ktim

>>213485788
why does he look 45

>>213485788
rorky porky pudding and pie

>>213485803
that's the stepmum

>>213485803
That's a SHE you rude git

>>213485788
serious lid on the lad

>>213485803
That’s the stepmum

get brit on a zoom meeting. i want to see your ugly mugs

>>213485875
/brit/ facetime call

Do /brit/, espcially NEETs or Hikikomoris, go to gym?

>>213485875
i'm actually quite pretty

>>213485834
kek this is me, although nobody was praying for my downfall because that would have required me to have some lasting impact (positive or negative) on anybody ive ever met

one must always choose yhe lesser of two binbles

some cunt at lunch had loaded fries and i was SEETHING with envy

loaded fries
whoever heard of such a thing
it's fucking genius

Would walk 500 miles, 500 more even, for a Canadian gf.

>>213485985
>miles
it's kilometers

>>213485985
baffling post
implying there's any difference between you cunts
British Columbians are more similar to West Coast Americans than they are Atlantic Canadians.
And vice versa, East Canadians are more New England-y then West Coasters (and ESPECIALLY southrons).

>>213486018
He wants a straw blonde, grey-eyed, mousey quebecois gf

GET IT MADE
(the bed, as its beddy byes)

10 hours of lo-fi beats to hate your life and want to die to

>>213485970
just chips with a load of shit dumped on them

evil poo

Artists who make industrial music are called industrialists. For example, Throbbing Gristle and Nine Inch Nails are industrialists.

>>213485526
He's just doing his job

>>213485909
didnt know she did of so i went to her twitter and shes like functionally retarded so i decided i couldnt fap to her
look what the jews are doing to us appalachians

>>213486114
dogs aren't supposed to bark unless there's n-words creeping about

>>213486134
That's why he's barking at you.

>>213486129
>shes like functionally retarded
What sorta stupid shit was she spouting

>>213486157
nothing in particular just can tell by the shit she finds funny and the way she types

>>213486129
eh she's in her like late 20s and posts pictures of herself in her knickers on fansly, she's probably made a few mil without showing a single nip

Entire nation of Canada has a population the size of California. Her fate is far from decided

might make a bacon cheese scranwich. who's to stop me after all

>>213486200
she's ours bitch get your grubby republican hands off

>>213486146
BTFO

>>213486213
me. i will stop you with psychic energy
UNNNNNNNHHHHHHGHHHHHH

cant wait for chuck norris to die got some cracking memes to bust out

screeching
https://x.com/WGNMorningNews/status/1951316237713043813

>>213486146
omdz

Psychic mutant outside going URGHNN URGHNN URGNN

>>213486244
>>213486283
settle down will you, it was the most low-hanging of fruit

most poggest Smeargle yet so far... rating?

>>213486259
noooo
*stays sat on my arse*

It’s pure satire

ive a non-shiny "last resort" eevee to copy too :3
sexo last resort eevee

>>213486338
i peeked

>>213486311
why do you love smeargle so much?

I love sneasel more (and am catching one from the "road to new friendships challenge") but really I love sableye more than smeargle

oh and I saw a moltres (I have articuno and zapdos) today 10 minutes ago as well. looking forward to seeing it again I hope - the shiny looks nice, looks like my kommo-o shiny

Have you ever experienced this?

Oh she thinking bout them cronem x

I just found saw an adolescent fox in my garden. They've been causing problems for me at night, constantly running around on my extension and making noise at night. but, today I saw one in my garden and wacked it a few times with a mop handle. the mop handle broke though and I think the fox was fine other than a couple of bruises (it was obviously addled up on adrenaline) it had difficulty jumping the fence and I guess i felt a little bad and stood there and watched as it tried like 6 times to jump the fence (I'm also pretty knackered from jogging + gym and I don't really think I could land any serious hits on it while it ran around my garden and I didn't want to wake the neighbours) should I have killed it (to rid my house forever of foxes) or was a I right not to kill it?

Beard not getting any thicker on my cheeks. Might be time to give up and shave but I know I’ll regret it

Leftypol....mate....

>>213486322
UHHHH! UUH FUCK, MMH THAT'S IT, UHHHH!

>>213486392
no but i wouldnt mind i think

>>213485875
haha yeah i do have an ugly mug. you cant see it thought i'm actually ashamed of it

>>213486398
*not extension. I meant roof

I would rather be a Pokemon... probably zorua, or more like sneasel.

>>213486399
shotcaller mode activated

I have 2 shiny sneasels (one of each kind)

>>213486461
grim little cunt you, aren't you
get yourself a honchkrow and fuck off back to lavender town

sneasel thing is likely my first independent thought in years and even it was guided, but I also need contact and intimacy

>>213486475
Ltim

>>213486473
I have one of those already because I am the best(!!!). also have a pelipper, I think

bumping to the new will smith jam

wow a water gun thunder castform on this account. IVs (14/1/15) too
I have been collecting these...

reminder just posting 'getting blacked' will result in a ban

>>213486500
Need his daughter MICKED pronto

>>213486522
good

>>213486522
i post that all the time and ive never been banned

another sneasel (appears reward)
that takes me -1 in berries, because I got 10 for doing the challenges to get the Pokemon

Never had a hobby or skill or friend

>>213486398
if it was eating vegetables or you have pets i would kill it. otherwise i personally would let it live

getting bla- l mean having sex with my white wife

>>213486398
hope it kills you tbqh

maybe dont post dogshit have you thought about that

>>213486400
very kino video honestly, the way he stops chanting as his movements become less coordinated like a wind-up toy running out is hypnotising

>>213484707 (OP)
>gay monsky edish
alri

>>213486545
Virginous post

have a feeling black holes are overrated

>>213486400
QRD?

>>213486603
nahhh lil bro fr got aura

>>213486621
ordered mild curry got extra spicy

>>213486613
I don't even believe they exist

>>213486621
mayo was too spicy

Farts, rude sounding noises and bodily smells happen during sex, that’s just a part of it.

A 42-year-old man has been arrested on suspicion of grievous bodily harm in connection to an alleged assault at St Pancras station on 28 July.

It comes after a video emerged, appearing to show the right-wing activist Tommy Robinson, real name Stephen Yaxley-Lennon, walking back and forth next to a man lying motionless on the ground.

Police said the man was arrested at Luton Airport shortly after 6.30pm, "following a notification that the man had boarded an incoming flight from Faro".

"The man had been wanted for questioning after leaving the country to Tenerife in the early hours of 29 August following the incident at St Pancras," officers said.

"He was arrested on suspicion of GBH (grievous bodily harm) and will now be taken to custody for questioning."

>>213486667
what would you do to earn the right to have her sit on your face?

send them all back

>>213486667
why do you do what you do for so long? do you make posts in /brit/ about things other than emma? do you post elsewhere on 4chan?

>>213486679
Eat her poo.

>>213486702
would you kiss a man?

made a bacon cheese scranwich while psychiclad was distracted

>what kind of a brit is this
this is a english
>what kind of a brit is this
this is a welsh, very rare
>what kind of a brit is this
this is a scotland, very mousey
>what kind of a brit is this
this is a irishman
>what kind of a brit is this
this is a australian, very dangerous

>>213486667
So whatever happened to Incubus, they were a good band.

>>213486694
he's a disabled 46 year old

>>213486602
It's the zogbots coming in with guns drawn like NPCs at the end for me

>>213486728
I’m neither of those things.

>>213486720
hey yankee, think fast
*throws something at you*
*you instinctively recoil as though anticipating something to hit you*
*you breathe a sigh of relief as you realise it must've been a fakeout because nothing happened
*you get smacked in the back of the head because it was a boomerang*

>>213485788
Interesting choice for a bbc article. Yes very informative.

>>213486744
>>213486746
this guy's 46 and on disability benefits

>>213486621
https://theworldwatch.com/videos/1616102/shock-us-air-force-airman-sets-himself-on-fire-to-protest-israeli-palestine-war/

and if you think about it, if you play Runescape, and keep yourself clean when going outside - even have a job - and you spend your weekends sat in a wetroom, naked, and shitting/pissing all over yourself while you play runescape then nobody would know, so long as everyone knows you outside as clean. thtat person next to you on the bus could spend his weekends on the computer shitting all over himself and you dont know that

bought some new clothes

+860XP to my to my XP

I took iron suppliments now my mouth tastes like rust

Just ate a toenail yum

nobody would know even if you had reposted that

>>213486785
Johnny Ross did WHAT?

mejiro tober c:

>>213486781
>almost 18 months ago
wow he unironically did it for nothing
literally the first i'm hearing of it, not even heard leftypol mention it
grim

Nobody care me

Currently listening to Deftones

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IxE6kaNuNB8

>>213486400
absolute fucking nutter

>>213486841
Least he got 'jakked

the mighty mighty deftones

>>213486870
screech

>>213486400
why did that buddhist fella become an historic political symbol while this guy was completely forgotten?

>>213486891
cause he was the first to do it

>>213486857
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o46kQ8ezamo
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C_0O2r8qU18
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cHiP3_-N0Vc
love me deftones

the deftones
the bosstones
the bluetones
the heytones
the gaytones

>>213486899
what 'firsts' are left for political martyrs today?

How do you get a dodgy stick then? When you don't know anyone.

why don't they call it the richter scale anymore

>>213486808
work some blood pudding into your diet

>>213486916
eating dog shit until you contract disease

>>213486400
One of the most insane things for me was seeing diehard Palestinian activists acting like this lad's suicide was some kind of "honourable sacrifice" and that making any kind of joke about it was somehow beyond the pale.

Stopped browsing the r/redscarepod subreddit after they tried to make that exact argument, and mass-downvoted anyone who was critical of the guy.

walt jabsco buggered me

Mad how much my knobber stinks, it's been very fishy today

>>213486933
strange little man you are

>>213486954
you asked

*falls asleep with a cigarette in my hand*

>>213486948
Mine smells of death and decay

>>213486965
strangle little man i am...

>>213486922
They got sued by 1980s WWF Women's champ Wendy Richter for implying she's a big fatty

>>213487005
>>213487005
>>213487005

>>213444800
>>213444800
>>213444800

>>213486967
hmm

>>213487000
If you are older than the age of 13 and know absolutely anything about wrestling, you are a turbo-virgin. Sorry I don't make the rules.

>>213487019
if that's true yeah how come i had sex twice over the weekend? not so clever now are you