Thread 213792734

Homer edition

>>213791574

BOOBA

Bored
Wish I were in Montenegro

>>213792749
Sex is so fucking overrated holy shit

>>213792749
Can we get a babecock of this

Just randomly woke up shall be returning to slumber in an hour or two

>>213792770
I've fucked plenty of prostitutes
It's all bullshit

Momberg made chicken nuggets tonight and they were tasty

>>213792790
how many that werent your mom?

drinking milk

To jerk or not to, Alas

Sometimes bros, the store-bought slop pizza just hits

>>213792822
No way, not again

>>213792822
enjoy buddy

>>213792827
hits the back of the trash can lid before falling in

I will acquire a Bulgarian wife

>>213792843
Got his ass

imagine how scary it must be for fish at night, like they can't see anything at all for a good 10 hours and they're just floating around where anything could eat them

>>213792827
california pizza kitchen margherita pizza is amazing

so basically straight guys tolerate male asshole pov for the same reason I tolerate pussy in porn. kek it must suck to be straight. I only rarely watch straight porn because pussy grosses me out but the (to you) gross male is a literally indispensable part of porn. someone even told me last thread they can't even get off to lesbian porn because if he can't see himself in the scenario he can't get off.

I hate when women try to tell me about their drama and personal life at work
Idc I'm there to work and nothing else

>>213792854
i don't think they're smart enough to fear stuff

I prefer the term “normal” over “straight”

>>213792859
Do you REALLY expect me to finish reading this post

>>213792864
they just want to talk because they like your company

>>213792859
I only jerk off to solo videos and pictures

>>213792884
by that logic gingers aren't normal because they're only 2% of the world population.

I hate MENA women like Italians because they are brown, but I can like some black women.

Imagine lying in a hospital bed 50 years from now, dying, and you think back on your life and remember all the time you spent shitposting on 4chan. Including reading this post. You'll remember this very post and what I've said.

>>213792859
>male asshole pov
We don't watch vids from that pov. Many regular vids the camera is held up so it's like from the pov of the guy, which helps create the impression you are the guy
Other vids sometimes do a side angle
I've never watched a porn vid that shows a dudes asshole, so you must be seeking that out, but you're probably trolling
Your question has already been answered. We self insert

>>213792886
did realizing you need to see dicks to coom give you gay panic?

>>213792889
Ok that's fine but I don't want to hear about their petty meaningless drama. I could care less

>>213792917
No, I only jerk off to lesbian porn
Your post seemed unpleasant so I didn't read it all

>>213792932
>I could care less
So you do care!

>>213792915
>We don't watch vids from that pov.
the mating press thread on /gif/ argues otherwise.

If someone ever uses the phrase "I could care less", i just automatically assume they are an NPC.
Someone with an ounce of critical thinking would never use a phrase that means the opposite of what they are trying to say

>>213792904
I'm hiking up a mountain and just dying up there. Hopefully they never find my body

Damn can't believe it's already Thursday time flies in the last months of the year

Why is jason beating it to babecock?

>>213792734 (OP)
https://youtu.be/OwHGE7uhjco?

I have a headache and I hate everything!

I could care less what you think

Babecock is arguably a lot more wholesome than industrial (((porn)))

I don't care for retarded tiktoks though, maybe put naked women next to cocks

>>213792961
How much less?

>>213792932
i'm not saying you have to lean forward and engage with the tea but people wanting to talk to you is a good thing

>>213792770
Being above the NEED for a gf is legit. You can still desire one but you should understand that you don't need one to be happy. Honestly I think it's hard to really grasp this unless you've had love and lost it. Love and singlehood and both great for different reasons

>>213792953
Cuddling and lazing away through the cold months...

>>213792952
based

>>213792950
Idk what that is i don't browse gif
I just go to regular porn sites like x videos

>>>/gif/29286240
look at this shit. the guy literally takes up 3/4ths of the vid

>>213792915
Male asshole pov implies you have the point of view of the male asshole looking out

I live in a state of perpetual post-nut clarity

you guys never change

>>213792979
>look at this shit
No thanks

>>213792961
*couldn't

>>213792969
No it's not when the things they are talking about are irrelevant to me.

>>213792989
Sorry I'm in a negative mood because of my headache

>>213792749
>belly piercing

>>213792997
You sound acoustic

>>>/gif/29287468
KEK

WHY DO YOU WATCH THIS

>>213792979
Yeah that's not arousing at all to me you can barely see the girl. So idg the point you're trying to make

Lately I've been having a fantasy about a (hypothetical) female friend who knows that I'm a virgin, and feels bad for me, so she lets me watch her have sex with her boyfriend to make me feel better.

>>213793001
that's fine buddy try to find something with a bit of caffeine in it and grab some tylenol
earl grey tea and a goody powder is like a magical headache cure for me

1 day till pizza day!

Hey I'm wub wub from the drawing game that one time, anyone remember me

>>213793020
I don't watch that

>>213793021
some people evidentially find it hot

>>213793010
it's just not something I care about
If you enjoy talking girlish gossip you're probably a fag

>>213793008
You're lucky Jason is posting about babecock cause if not this would be the gayest post in the thread

>>213792989
>>213793025
Queen spinny

>>213792997
i guess if it bothers you enough you can tell them to not talk to you? there's no way to do that without being an ass though

>>213793027
I know why you're revealing your identity right now, rather than any other time.
I have excellent pattern recognition skills, and can see what is happening in this thread, and who is here.

>>213793035
Yeah fags probably

>>213793043
>I know why you're revealing your identity right now, rather than any other time
Explain

Keep away from the digital bitch

>>213793050
No it's too cringe

>>213792734 (OP)
Anyone here good with cats? I've lived with my adopted cat now for like 4 or 5 months and it's more or less fine except for 1 major problem. He is completely uncontrollable. He won't sit still for me at all. Normally this doesn't matter, but occasionally something I need to investigate on his fur or whatever and it's impossible. Completely and utterly impossible. I've been unable to trim his claws even once because of this. Today, he has something on his back leg I don't know wtf it is but he won't sit still to let me investigate it. Any attempt is met with him getting overly excited and trying to play too much or getting annoyed and clawing at me with increasing intensity. How the fuck do you get your cat to sit still for like 2 minutes. When I first got him, the guy at the shelter grabbed his paw and held it up and told me it's something important you want them to get used to. Since then I've never once managed to pull that maneuver off. If I try Iifting his paw he will start biting and clawing me, at first really lightly but if I push it he starts actually drawing blood.

>>213793054
Say it. This website is anonymous. I want to see if you're right

>>213793027
i remember you

>>213793066
You know I'm right. I don't need to prove it.

>>213793077
I don't know shit I'm retarded as fuck
>>213793069
No you don't

>>213793056
You need to hire the cat whisperer
https://youtu.be/KGIBLx2zhmc?si=A743TaGbo4-phPmz

>>213793056
oven mitts for the short term
lots of coaxing and treats in the long term, rewarding touch time with treats

>>213793052
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=USrDZRgEfMw

>>213793081
Nevermind

>>213793056
No you don't just grab a cat's paw like that outright. That guy was retarded
You lightly run your finger along the cats spine and pet it rub it's mouth on your finger
Then when it trust you and is laying on your lap or cuddled in your you can lightly lift the paw and examine it

>>213793081
yes i do i made this image >>213793083

>>213793083
You're a real one
>>213793097
Knew you didn't know

Who is wubwub

>>213793093
voca.ro/1bN8sUc1ajxc

>>213792279
>Buddhism spread to China around 200BC to 200AD
Totally wrong. You have no idea what you're talking about.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Amoghavajra
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vajrabodhi
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/%C5%9Aubhakarasi%E1%B9%83ha
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Xuanzang

>>213793100
*let it rub

>>213793102
No I do know
How about this: i will tell you my suspicion tomorrow

>>213793104
skribbl player from last year

>got cheeks clapped one more time just to see if it would make me happy
>Didn't work again
Why do I even try

>>213793119
Ewww

>>213793093
Based Sabbath enjoyer
>>213793085
They call me the pussy whisperer

Testing some new orangutan videos.

>>213793119
i have seen this exact post before a long time ago but last time your objective was to feel pretty and it didn't help

>>213793101
Liar. Spinster made that and she hasn't been here in many months

>>213793106
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sqPClltS5k8

I now have a sourdough starter. Time to get a bread basket and I'm all ready.

>>213793132
unless?

>>213793128
Why in the hell are you stalking me? What is your problem

>>213793126
>>213793142
These guys are getting killed so Indonesia can harvest palm oil to put in YOUR goyslop

>>213793149
I can't believe Lanky Kong is fucking dead

JOI and babecock are still porn, but not (((porn)))

They are closer to authentic early internet wholesome mostly for attention porn.

>>213793137
can i come over when it's all ready to go

Awful thread, too much fag shit
I'm out gn

zoomtards be straight challenge: literally unpossible

>>213793037
sent that mexican freak into the stratosphere

>>213793176
yeah too many gay niggas
I'm out

There's nothing wrong with being bi, boomer christcuck.

getting home from a 14 day vacation is very bittersweet
i feel melancholy

>>213793100
>when it trust you and is laying on your lap or cuddled in your you can lightly lift the paw and examine it
He won't lie in my lap pretty much ever. Idk if I'm too bony or what but he almost never will sit on my lap. Sometimes when I'm sleeping he will for like 2 seconds but he always immediately gets back up and just sits next to me instead. Anyways I managed to get a decent look at it now while he's laying next to me. I have no clue wtf it is but seems to be some sort of eczema like rash. I think it hurts because when I touched it he got pissed again and start biting my hand

ashkenazis are not semitic btw

>>213793132
she didnt make it i did i made the first post with it

>>213793221
It's fun when you get to tell everyone back home about it

>>213793239
Yeah but yapping about the pictures i took or the stuff i did and saw doesn't change how i feel
Glad to be home but feel kind of hollow, I was getting a bit homesick towards the end but now that i'm here it feels kind of not real

>>213793235
Wow you had the receipts
So are you her

thread has gotten unbearably gay, time for bed

gn /cum/shots

>>213793280
no im not her

>>213793261
>Boyadzhyan claims he has a long-running grievance with LAPD’s Van Nuys division over a personal issue and that the loud sirens are his way of getting the department’s attention.

>“I do sincerely apologize to my neighbors,” Boyadzhyan told KTLA’s Ellina Abovian. “I, honestly to God, am so sorry to discomfort you guys in your own homes, but I don’t know what else to do.”

>He wouldn’t explain what the nature of his personal grievance was, only saying that he needed help and that he wanted “justice to be served.”

Kek

Love when faggots have to loudly proclaim how straight they are.

>>213793283
this is something my dad would send me

>>213793037
>porn addicts get turned on by belly piercing
>porn addiction turns men into fags and trannies

there is only 1 chocolate bar left and momberg said she wants half

>>213793319
It's nice to share

>>213793319
You're gonna give it to her right? You're not a selfish fat fuck are you?

>>213793283
night bud

>>213793319
Trade her half the chocolate for sucking half of your dick.

>>213793319
I know you lookin at that shit like bilbo baggins with the one ring

we did it

justice has been served

>>213793352
Fake news

>>213793348
this took me out

>>213793269
I bask in the glow of trips for a while after coming back from them, and their aura never leaves me

>>213793371
This is a better and more productive mindset to have about it
I will say that that first shower not in a hotel at home in my own shower to wash the stink of that city off me was heavenly

>>213793310
Rich coming from a nonce

>>213793402
There's a little warning on the bottle that says specifically not to do this

>>213793406
bodied that freak

>Harvey
>Epstein
LOL

This is what I crave

>>213793448
Looks tasty

>>213793448
Looks like AI.

>>213793222
Youve asked this question before in here
All I can say is pretty much the same as what i said the last time that generally to get a cat to trust you:
1. No sudden movements, no grabbing , or jolting it. Some cats kind of like if you playfully tease it a little like five it a little poke
2. Avoid directly staring into the cats eyes for any extended length of time
3. Along the spine, top of head, and face are the spots cat must enjoy to be petted

>>213793448
The Croatian version is superior but all versions are tasty

>Epstein is Jewish.
>Epstein is a liberal zionist
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harvey_Epstein

back on the filter list goes mexico

*Obama voice* uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh I'm gonna cum!

It's going to be september in 15 days
This is horrible news for anyone already carrying a pensive sadness

>>213793464
It's not, that's just what it looks like.
Here's one from a family dinner last year

>>213793455
It is
>>213793479
I've only had the Greek version

>>213793514
I would mess this up right now

i love womens farts

>>213793530
It's easy to inhale the whole thing, but you'll regret it haha

>biased
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/LXxjf0esXE8

Holy shit its not even 11

>>213793419
ok

Should i smoke a bit and watch some funny youtube comfort stuff or should i go walk around in the garden for a little while
It's a full moon right now, it was yesterday but it's still pretty bright

>>213793522
I think the filling is the same the difference is how you form it. The Croatian version is layered instead of rolled.

>>213793565
Smoke then walk in the garden

>>213793591
i find clothed ladies more attractive

>>213793606
Wonderful idea thank you, bye bye

>job tells us they won't be accepting any vacation requests for November and December
>tells us this is the best time and for those of us with a bunch of vacation days to please start using them now
>apply for a bunch of days off, ask for at least one day every week of August
>manager asks me about my vacation requests, confirms the dates etc
>proceeds to not approve fucking any of them
>was really needing today off but now I'm stuck working because it didn't get approved
>my manager himself is out today, probably using his vacation days
I'm pretty salty. Definitely going to be calling out sick tomorrow since they won't fucking approve my vacation requests. Ffs.

>>213793541
how long have you had this mental illness

>>213793623
Just use all your sick days in November/December

>>213793638
when i started browsing 4chan

I want to have sexual intercourse with Pam Bondi

>>213793623
They can't force you to come in, you know

>>213793670
It's Kayleigh mceny for me

>>213793702
>>213793563
Short anon
Yo

>>213793702
what's he playing?

>>213793718
im not him, bully anon

>>213793665
I've seen posts about "braps" here from several other flags and also a couple times on /fit/
I swear people on this fucking site fall for every fetish and redpill waved in front of them

I want you
When the sun comes up
I wanna make you mine
I wanna make it count
I want you
I wanna take you home
I'm gonna make it known
I wanna take you on

>>213793731
It's disgusting, and it's ruined facesitting porn because it's hard to search for it without also seeing fart porn

>>213793721
super mario nes

>>213793653
They will fire people for doing that
>>213793690
I'm fully aware.

yeeeeeeeehawwwwwwwwww

>>213793731
i used to hate trannies now i jerk off to them

>white women cosplaying as indigenous woman
https://youtu.be/FwZuy8sEeps

>>213793767
straightest canadian

>>213793767
You can do both you know
>>213792734 (OP)
Hahaha Dan Schneider's Teen Titans! Lol! It'd be so funny if someone had more pictures of starfire and ravens feet hahahah. That'd be so silly

I would devour this

>>213793814
That's a lot of opium

>>213793319
just give it, it’s a piece of candy that is easily replaced

>>213793829
*hits pipe*

>>213793829
White lotus, yam yam, shanghai sally.

have the schizos finally left?

>>213793803
i only respect the pronouns of the ones that pass

>>213793873
yes we have left

Why do westerners travel to Thailand to have sex with ladyboys?

>>213793745
If they fire you without just cause you can sue.
And/Or you can go on unemployment.

goodnight

should i brush my brown rotten teeth?

>>213794130
nah have a coke

>>213794130
no

>>213794130
Jesus christ yes, you are in for a rough late adulthood if you don't take care of your teeth

>>213794223
don't listen ot this gay

>>213794223
hows brushing going to save my already rotten teeth
>>213794153
im out of them

i dont brush my teeth and im fine

>>213794278
can i lick your teeth clean and nibble on the food stuck between them?

The secret to immortality is futa cock

>>213794055
Nope. My state doesn't have those sorts of worker protections. You can be fired at any time for any reason with no recourse. Of course you still would have a case if they told you "we fired you for xyz/because you are [protected class]", but they don't have to provide a reason at all for firing you and they obviously know better than doing something so stupid. They'll just fire you without explaining why. You'd have to prove they fired you for an illegal reason which obviously is not possible.
>>213792734 (OP)
I hate how unpleasant some of the customers who call in are. "AHHH ALL MY MONEY IS GONE!". No ma'am it's not, you're reading your statement incorrectly. Your money is still there. "I THOUGHT IT WAS GONE". No, everything still there you're all good. "I WAS SO ANGRY! WHEN I SAW IT I THOUGHT MY MONEY WAS GONE." OK. Sorry to hear that. Thankfully that isn't the case. "I GOT SO SCARED AND ANGRY. THE STATEMENT I THOUGHT IT SAID I HAVE NO MONEY IN MY ACCOUNT"

... and so on for like 5 minutes straight. I literally don't know what the fuck these people want from me. They will complain about something that's entirely due to their own misunderstanding and then after you explain that whatever they're mad about didn't even actually happen they just keep yelling anyways in an endless circle until they finally get bored and hang up. I've found the best thing is just putting them on hold and walking away, usually they'll just hang up. Otherwise they'll keep yelling at you for several minutes for literally no reason.

I don't currently own a toothbrush, it got dirty and I threw it out. I've been using listerine though and I'm gonna go buy a new one tomorrow.

>>213794391
>we fired you for xyz/because you are [protected class]
things will unironically be better if we could get rid of the "protected class" bullshit

>>213794386
i like trannies but not futa

Americans be like oh gosh darnit I missed my turn and now I’m stuck in this couldersack I’ll be late to my wife’s boyfriend bond bail hearing at the district court over on Lincoln drive by the strip mall lucky I got my 5 quart big gulp

evens i launch halo
odds i launch into my bed

>>213794513
It's true

>>213794467
Odd since it's usually the other way around.

>>213794516
u finna boutta stay up all night eh?

>>213794528
Milka was always 100g
Now they upped the price to 1,99€ per bar and reduced the weight to 90g
It’s a shame!!!

>>213794546
i slept earlier i woke up at 12am

so there's DEFINITELY something on antarctica they don't want us to know about. I wonder what it is

>>213794605
Yeti sex camps
It’s like Epstein island but even more extreme
The global elite does NOT want you to know

>>213794605
How does a 19 year old get up to such a task as "flying to all 7 continents solo"
Are his parents funding him?

>>213794635
probably. being a pilot at 19 means you learned as a kid

>>213794605
>forced to make the landing
riiiiight totally believable excuse

>>213794672
noooooooooooo you can't just land a plane on an empty sheet of ice noooooooooo that's like...bad or smthn

>>213794605
illegal to whom? what law? Antarctica is under no jurisdiction of law

>>213794686
think of the poor pinguinos

>>213792749
that's not ika it's another italian woman
https://www.instagram.com/p/C9Kv-zINdeJ/

>>213794706
they'll move

I have my phone plugged in to the wall next to my bed and the adapter is burning hot. Do you think that'll cause a problem.

boobs above D cup are gross imo

>>213794865
yes unplug it immediately

Question:
Do your chain hang low?

>>213794881
But I need to charge my phone

>>213794865
Depends if you think burning to death is a problem.

>>213794942
Plug it in somewhere else

>>213794865
Mine does this and also makes a loud screeching noise but I just ignore it

>>213794964
It won't charge if I plug it into my turned off PC and I can't reach it anywhere else(I'm reading a book on it)

there are still niggas pretending that anime isn't mainstream

>>213794992
turn on your pc then

I'm so fucking tired. Really, really tired. Just want to sleep for like 3 days straight... actually I already did. But the moment I open my eyes I'm immediately exhausted again

ate my half of the chocolate bar i want more

>>213795401
Don't be a fatty fat fatty

>>213795441
im beautiful at any size

>>213795455
You go girl

>>213795401
resist the temptation anon, do it for momberg

>>213795478
we are going to ikea and buying chocolate there this weekend though

>>213795485
get those refrigerated ones that come in the pink and yellow package

>>213795485
>ikea chocolate
tell me more

>>213795485
>going into Ikea
Didn't you see that SCP anon posted about yesterday? There's a chance you get stuck in infinite ikea which is filled with faceless ikea workers who will tear you apart while calmly saying "the store is now closed, please leave"

>>213795509
>>213795511
we get these
>>213795689
ikea is comfy so it doesnt sound so bad

Labubu sisters our response?

>>213796013
this bitch look like a homestuck character

>>213795743
get rid of that crap and buy one of these

I became so ascetic and mysterious-pilled that I have I have passed into the realm of forgotten lore.

or (my friends and family don’t even attempt to contact me anymore)

from a daoist, yin-yang point of view, wouldn't hate be just as important as love

>>213796054
booger treat

Reading ahhhhhhhh book.

>>213796212
im going to smear my reply all over the walls of your parents home in their blood

its been too long since ive had pudding

honey labubu

I’m going to smear my peanut butter all over the walls of your pussy

i feel bad, i shouldn't have said that. what if i ruined anons ikea trip with my ironically edgy comment

>>213796030
Dunno what that means

major league monster sippin rn
forearm day today
yesterday at night both of my shoulders kept tingling and feeling almost numb
think I may be overtraining but I shrimply can't stop

I’m going to matcha my crumbl cookie all over the dubai chocolate of your labubu

I’m going to crumbl my matcha all over the dubai chocolate of your labubu

i ask a lot of "why" questions not because i care about the topic at hand (i'll take anything you say at face value), but because i want to sound inquisitive

>>213797080
why do you want to sound inquisitive?

>>213797095
just because

>>213796807
>Pic
There'd better be a fucking dick down there or I'm going to be FURIOUS. If I reach down and don't feel a penis I'm punching a hole in the wall
>>213792734 (OP)
Client called in and I fucking jumped awake. They hung up immediately after I answered. Their account had a bunch of fraud flags on it. Probably they are calling in and hanging up over and over hoping to get a rep they think will break policies or something. Idk. Idgaf. All I know is that resets me on the queue. There's like 30 people and only maybe 3 calls every 45 mins right now. I can't do that math on that but I know that means I probably can get a good bit more sleep before it's my turn for a call again.

I won't go to the gym anymore. My penis got injured in the gym now I got PTSD. I won't go in there. Never again.

>>213797140
What about a pokemon gym? To get the badges.

theres a big spider sitting above the the ceiling fan blades in my room

>>213797218
He might try crawling into your pee hole while you're sleep

>>213797344
maybe it's a sexy female spider

My resting heart rate is 62 bpm.

I found a universal way to tell if a tv series has gone to shit, or is about to go to shit. It's when they make a little girl child character a fucking ninja. After that, the shows downfall is always a mere few episodes away.
Examples:
Barry
Game of Thrones (Arya)
Walking Dead