Thread 40763306

I'm aware of the fact that I walk around in life without ever actually experiencing anything that makes us human

I've never been loved before
never held hands, kissed, been in a relationship, nothing
I don't have any friends and haven't for nearly 6 years now
I don't have a passion, I'm not good at anything

I'm the lowest of the low, every other person I walk by has lived a real life, meanwhile I don't have any of the experiences that make us human.
I don't do anything at all, I sit at home like a leech, I go outside and walk past all the real humans, and I don't contribute anything to the world

>>40763306 (OP)
there are lots of us like this nona
in the world
its the most annoying thing to hear because your suffering is still unique to you and this doesnt diminish it
but you also arent completely alone in this type of suffering because life fucking sucks for a lot of people that just never speak up anywhere about it
hang in there though i dont have an answer either because im the same and its awful and feels more and more insurmountable as time goes by

yeah so you should just die

>>40763306 (OP)
go and traumatise yourself. it's the only way, I'd be like you if I hadn't had experienced a shit ton of mental trauma
I love you <3 you will love everything, everything will love you, if you just have an axiom
nothing matters. you don't even truly want friends/love, and they won't save you. you only save yourself. you are human

>>40763306 (OP)
what happens when you talk to others?

>>40763306 (OP)
you could be schizoid

>>40763306 (OP)

You have values, you are alive but it is a dreary existence. People like us were not meant to survive. One day I acknowledged that I would have to die no matter what. Physically or spiritually. I told myself: if I have to die, then avenge me. Keep my ideals, the things I value, in your heart. Keep them safe. Be my black knight, and destroy everything that holds me back. Everything I hate. Starting with me. And when my dreams are realized you may revive me. Only then for the first time might I love myself.

>>40763306 (OP)
you should look to this guy >>40762730 for inspiration

>>40765438
Yet another example of how klinikal psykology is more or less just a vessel for people to legimitize normative sosial behaviors and fabrikate a justifikation to marginalize and harrass those who are abnormal ,by defining them as mentally ill

>>40765438
schizoids have a distinct lack of desire for close relationships and OP seems to be lamenting their lack of relationships. if anything it's more closesly aligned with avoidant behavior; sense of inferiority, self isolation, and a lack of close relationships despite an intense desire for them. it's a very barren existence

>>40765438
How do I become schizoid
It seems like it would be easier than feeling lonely all the time. Can I make myself schizoid?? Being srs
t. Not OP

>>40766510
you can't become it, you're born that way

>>40768651
schizoids aren’t born schizoid
personality disorders are acquired during childhood to adulthood, usually because of traumatic upbringing

>>40765438
Why can't retards let this pseudoscience die? "Psychology" is literally a bunch of old white men making up different terms for shitty childhood syndrome and treating them as odd forms of neurodiversity instead of as completely natural adaptations to our rapidly deteriorating society and the failures of individualism and nuclear households.

im not human either. not because i lack certain experiences but because of something deeper. a disconnect between my soul and my body. youre just a "im not human" poser

>>40766510
im pretty sure schizoids still feel lonely, they just don't get relief from it by being with friends. not great

>>40763306 (OP)
if you were intelligent you would have killed yourself already. there is nothing ahead of you besides pain and suffering, you don't get the human card to distract yourself with love and relationships, now it's too late. once you truly immerse yourself in that empty loneliness and nihilism you can only temporarily distract yourself from it before it eats you whole again. most people live in bliss, adjust socially and never experience real emotional isolation but once you do there is no recovery, it genuinely never leaves you, you cannot readjust. so just rope as soon as possible, look into roping methods. this is the only positive, sensible action and the only positive, sensible advice that "humanist" psychology and extant neurotypicalism vehemently denies.

>>40769036
nuclear truth

>>40769130
This. Every schizoid secretly fantasizes about connection and companionship that matters, but it has no effect on us when we find it. Being schizoid is like losing your sense of taste, because you still know what things should taste like or have food cravings, it's just that when you eat it you feel nothing so eventually you stop bothering and subsist on nutrient paste while minmaxxing anything you can still actually feel.
This is why we so often have a weird mix of incredibly boring lives, inner social fantasies and lives, and consistent "one off" voyeurisms into things like hard sex or drugs to short circuit us into an experience close enough to what we want through a sense we still have access to in order to get a moment of pseudo-satiety.

>>40769036
trvke. niggas actually think BPD is a real diagnosis LMFAO

humanity isn't all that nice idk why people are so obsessed with being human

>>40763306 (OP)
>I've never been loved before
>never held hands, kissed, been in a relationship, nothing
>I don't have any friends and haven't for nearly 6 years now
>I don't have a passion, I'm not good at anything
Me neither. I have no idea how to make friends. Anything romantic is foreign to me. I have tried various hobbies, but they all feel boring and empty. My whole life is boring and empty.

The worst part is, even if I woke up and magically I had everything I ever wanted, I don't know if I could even enjoy it. I'm too mentally inhibited and stunted. I would just freeze up.

>>40763306 (OP)
SAME

>>40770508
Imagine thinking personality disorders aren't real. BPD is a definite thing, go meet someone with it. People who call psychology a pseudoscience are retards, things need to be grouped for a reason, so they can be accurately identified and treated. Sure it isn't perfect, but it is necessary.
Anyone who says otherwise is a low IQ retard.

>>40770126
>>40769130
Sad but true.

"If only I had someone to love and to love me back, then I would be human."
>Feel no relief the moment someone provides any positive emotional attention, it's no better or worse than being isolated.

"If only I had friends who called me and wanted to hang out, then I would be human"
>No matter the event or subject of discussion, it feels no better or worse than spending time alone.

"If I have degenerate sexual encounters, then I would be human"
>No matter what fantasy was fulfilled, it feels no better or worse than masturbating.

It's not that being human is painful or I can't do decently enough it if I try but when everything is equal the things in life that require other people get pushed away because they're just more work for the same reward. Eventually life gets optimized for solitude and you start to feel like an alien compared to all the normal people you see. You know intellectually that you're missing out on something but it's something you're completely unable to experience.

>>40770599
>BPD is a definite thing, go meet someone with it.
I have. It's just an excuse to be an awful person and avoid any blame for it. BPDemons always drop the act as soon as there's real consequences to their shit, proving they can control themselves, and then resume as soon as they know they'll get away with it, proving they know what they're doing.

>>40770919
>BPDemons always drop the act as soon as there's real consequences to their shit, proving they can control themselves
boy do I wish it worked like that lmao

>>40770935
If it didn't you'd be in jail. Prove me wrong.

>>40770939
I should be in jail but the system isnt perfect sweetie

>>40770942
Fake guilt. If you honestly cared you'd turn yourself in and rid society of another bpdemon.