>>41349834
>People usually claim that the fact they get turned on by fantasizing about being female is a result of their innate female gender identity leaking out but it makes a lot more sense that the sexual predilection is the driving force behind the dysphoria. I can't prove it but I would bet almost everything that 90+% of gynephilic trans women are AGP.
I'll make a confession: I'm pretty sure I'm true AGP. When I was a prepubescent child, I had weird pre-AGP thoughts: obsessions with questions like "What does having a vagina and not a penis feel like? What do [insert x women's clothes] even feel like? What would it be like to be a girl? What would it be like to be that woman?" I did not feel "I am a girl, there must be a misclassification, why is my body wrong" but that I was a boy who was just desperately curious about what being a girl was like to the point of hoping magic wishes were real. Literally, I would think about it, imagining it for hours some days. I would sometimes wish before bed that I would wake up as a girl, but only for a day in case I didn't like it.
This led to me consuming genderbending fiction and media, and this became the sexual AGP fetish, and I would read AGP erotica usually.
I tried to get rid of it as a teenager, but unsuccessfully. I'm pretty sure I just had the wrong wires crossed at a critical time, the same way people with foot fetishes had weird formative experiences with feet as a kid that led to their fetish.
Any sort of actual, physical dysphoria did not happen until I was around 18, and I guess it was just too late by then.
But I'm pretty much how Blanchard describes AGPs. Dysphoria that only happens as an adult emerging from a weird obsessive sexual fetish that grows out of control, and not any sort of innate feeling of femaleness.
