Thread 41407651

Cocaine gives me so much confidence. It kills my anxiety, shame, and neuroticism in general, and it's been helping me lose fat. I'm a pretty jacked AGP man. I make sure to take 5mg finasteride to preserve my hairline and I'm going to switch to dutasteride soon, but I've been taking steroids for over a year now, and I started lifting in 2013, so I'm pretty jacked, but I have strong, enormous glutes. I make sure to give them plenty of isolation work. They're the first leg muscle I train at the gym. I only need to lose around 50 or 60 pounds of fat before I'll be lean or possibly have abs.

I'm 25, 5'11, have beautiful, long hair I take care of and a full hairline, and I would likely weigh somewhere around 200 to 210 with possibly abs (if my skin is still tight). Once I finally lose my fat, I want to get a really cute maid outfit like this with a cute face mask and eye makeup and snort and inject a bunch of coke and start walking out in the middle of the night with some tool to give me occasional bumps. I would just make sure I've gotten plenty of sleep beforehand and not actually harass anybody who doesn't show interest. I know damn well this would be the most fun shit I've ever done in my life. Just walking around the local apartment complexes and having people see me at night and see my enormous ass and start thinking about it. I would get a BBL on top if it didn't mean a lot of women would get turned off. Hung men would be allowed to enjoy my beefy ass.

There's a nice park about an hour away from me where I sometimes ride my bike and there's a sissy boomer there who goes there on weekends just walking around in heels and a tacky dress and a wig, not bothering anyone and it's kind of nightmare fuel desu, I feel so bad for the guy but growing up conservative does shit to your brain.

Anyway that's what this post made me think of, keep in mind just because you're not actively approaching people doesn't mean you're not, in a sense, involving other people in your fetish without their consent. I'm not offended, I just feel pity, but others may not respond in the same way. Can't you just wear makeup and women's jeans or something? Just go halfway and not make it weird?

>>41407675
I am pretty right wing and libertarian, but I'd make sure not to be ugly before actually doing this. This is why I strongly anticipate losing those last 50 to 60 pounds of fat and keeping my hairline from receding. I'm still young at 25. I'm sure some people would find it hot and exotic to see such a muscular man looking so cute and feminine.

Who the fuck asked sage

just go to a queer club pls they exist for exactly this kinda thing + you won't be bothering anyone + people might actually be interested + plap you in the mussy

>>41407685
> I'd make sure not to be ugly before actually doing this
That's a good thought, but might I suggest jerking off and *then* dressing up in the outfit, without doing coke first, and taking a cold look at yourself in the mirror without the benefit of delulu drugs or being horny? Coke deletes your self awareness which is why people who don't do coke don't like hanging out with people who are on coke. The non coke person just ends up feeling like an accessory or an NPC to the coke person's coke experience. People who have tried coke can kind of connect a little better with what's going through your head but people who haven't will be completely repulsed by your behavior (I'm not talking about crossdressing, just general interactions between cokeheads and non cokeheads).

>>41407651 (OP)
You say you are
>25, 5'11, 50 or 60 pounds overweight, and aiming for 200 to 210.
So you are 270 pounds, doing coke, at night, half naked in women's clothes and want to wander around apartment complexes? Bro, the cops are going to arrest you or you are going to have a heart attack from the coke.
>cute face mask
Ok, you had me going, now I know this is a larp. Those masks are 11/10 creepy and I don't think even the most AGP of gooners would try to wear one outside. A+ troll, bravo

>>41407732
I know. The coke kills my shame and makes me view myself as beautiful. It still doesn't kill my IQ, though, so I know I'd be perceived as ugly and make a fool out of myself in public if I were fat. I'd ask online about make up, and especially eye make up, and I'd wear a cute mask over my face. I want hung men to perceive me as a hot woman with a really nice, huge ass and think about doing things to me.

>>41407740
>Those masks are 11/10 creepy
I've seen an irl femboy wear one. They cover up your masculine facial features pretty well. All you see are the seductive eyes with makeup. Oddly enough, a lot of men can perceive a more masculine eye area as attractive in women, so the eyes aren't as offensive as the rest of the face with the masculinity.

>>41407740
>>41407768
Also, when I weighed myself yesterday, I weighed 253. I've likely lost some fat and water weight from the cut, but I still look leaner from the loss of water weight. Once the cut is over and I go on a soft bulk and gradually gain back all that water weight in my muscle, I'll look pretty jacked, and I'll likely get a bit of a pump in for my glutes prior to going out. It'll just be a night stroll.

>>41407651 (OP)
you should be careful with these type of drugs nona, i have done cocaine too and my autism goes away. and because is too good to be true, i havent repeat it. drugs are not a good thing. It doesn't matter how mentally ill one is

>>41407740
>>41407768
>>41407786
I've had this fantasy for likely over a year now, but the cocaine part is more recent, like the last month. I now know the cocaine has the potential to drastically speed up my fat loss due to mental issues about illogical fear of losing strength and muscle from a large caloric deficit.

>>41407797
I did coke and became a very obnoxious cuntpilled faggot. Not touching that stuff again

>>41407813
Coke just gives you really high self esteem and kills a lot of your shame. You still have your IQ in tact, so you should mostly be able to tell what would actually get you in trouble and what most people would actually consider to be shameful and not do it, though.

>>41407825
>didn't consider me being autistic

>>41407832
How do you think your autism made it worse? If you're in front of the wrong people, you might open up about certain parts of your sexuality that you logically realize you should feel no shame over that complicate your interactions with that person in the future.

>>41407844
I was very mean to ppl and there was no attraction involved. It's just better I keep most of my thoughts to myself or post them anonymously on 4chan.

Uppers, not even once

>>41407873
Alcohol is technically both a stimulant and a depressant. It boosts your dopamine, and this is a stimulant effect. Drunks like to do talk and dance and have higher self esteem.

Coke is too expensive and addicting. As with a lot of drugs deminishing returns if used frequent. Theres no winning.

>>41407962
Buy fish scale in bulk off the black market. You technically save a bit of money IVing it due to the 70 VS nearly 100% absorption rate of insufflation VS IVing. Instead of doing lines, you prepare injections. This wouldn't be a daily thing, though. I think some opioids might help with the withdrawal, so you'd snort half an M30 or so when you're running low on coke or planning on stopping.

>just do liquid crack
yeah or also maybe not

>>41407700
>queer club
what is this?

>>41407651 (OP)
>cd nightwalk
i've considered it but people have cameras these days everywhere

>>41409394
god i hate cameras. makes me so uncomfortable knowing that at any moment just by existing in a public place i could end up on tv for millions to see, or on some teenagers snapchat that circulates through their whole school and it could happen while i was boymoding or just generally looking like shit

bump, this thread is too unhinged and hilarious to die

>>41407651 (OP)
i feel like i read this post already

Ive done night walks while cross dressed, I used to be addicted to doing it. Sometimes I'd even put myself in like...rapeable scenarios, like id tie myself up somewhere or hang myself off of something by my underwear. I did this for almost a decade and never had sex from it once, mostly people just threatened to beat my ass

I dont do it anymore because I transitioned and wearing girl clothes stop being exciting....tho sometimes I do look at my old maid outfit and get tempted to get back out there

>>41410769
I'm a cd, but I never saw the appeal of a night walk in my own neighborhood. At best, I went downtown cross-dressed to a gay bar on a night they had a drag show. Show ended, and I walked around downtown a bit before going home. I don't see the appeal of a walk in heels in a neighborhood where you won't likely see anyone or them see you.
>hang myself off of something by my underwear
Really, now.jpg

>>41410931
Idk, I was too young to go to bars at the time and even when I got older I didnt like to drink, I got no reason to go to a bar. Meanwhile a walk around the neighborhood is always nice and comfy if you live in a good area, the times where I almost got beat were in different neighborhoods that I bravely ventured to after my home area got boring
>really now
Yes ._.
Back then all I wanted was for someone to manhandle me and give me wedgies and treat me like a little dweeb. That's my dark secret, I like getting wedgies

>>41410998
>That's my dark secret, I like getting wedgies
I'm OP. I developed this fetish shortly after beginning puberty when I was 11.

>>41410998
Its just wild. So, its nighttime, and you find a fencepost and hoist yourself up on a post. And just sit there hoping someone comes by? Really? Lol, I'd get bored waiting.

>>41411011
Based and wedgiepilled
>>41411029
Sometimes id jerk off to pass the time, but yes id just hang and wait for people. More often than not people would just help me down tho, not once was I ever raped or anything. Ive only had sex once in my life lmao and it had nothing to do with wedgies or being outside at night....well it had something to do with being outside at night but it wasnt a cross dressing night. I was grabbing drinks from the gas station and ran into this pooner who id seen around town a few times and he asked if I wanted to go back to his place cuz he lived nearby so I did and we did stuff. Only time ive ever had sex lmao