Thread 24626276

old >>24622362

>>24626307
it's almost perfect, but I wish you had made the swastika the pussy's asshole.

>>24626307
I am going to confess something on here that might get me banned from 4chan forever. I don't know how this will be received by our community here. I unironically love Hitler.

It's funny how new technologies are immediately appropriated for entertainment. Whoever invented the camera probably couldn't predict Hollywood. The printing press too. Computers and video games. It seems humanity needs impossible amounts of entertainment.

>>24626311
wtf jannies ban this man

>Not even allowed to buy some land and build a log cabin on it anymore. You have to go through crazy council shit and there's a good chance they won't even let you despite it being your land.
The urge to kill myself grows stronger and stronger every day.

tfw from guam

>>24626310
That would be too vulgar

>>24626352
Grim. My condolences.

hewwo owo

Is this the thread where everyone plays with their keyboard? I need me some visual noise.

Everything is so fucking BAD!!! Every kind of thing there is, the average thing in that category of thing is 2% the thing it's supposed to be. I just stumble like a shellshocked faggot from thing to thing, getting more and more shellshocked. What's this, a sandwich? It has nails in it for some reason. "That's not a sandwich." But everyone around me is eating the sandwiches. "Excuse me, does anyone notice there are nails in these sandwiches?" Nobody cares. "Excuse me sir, your sandwiches have nails in them. I'm not even mad, but are you aware that nails are not a typical component of a typical sandwich?" Looked at like I'm insane. I'm going to fucking bite my fingers off. Everything is a triangle with a random bump or spiky protrusion on it. THAT'S NOT A FUCKING TRIANGLE!!!!!!!!

Women lose the ability to pair bond after too many partners. Because after n partners no single man will ever measure up to the sum of her past partners. So and so was taller, another had a bigger cock, and one was richer, another smarter And so on and so forth. I'd guess this can be induced in as few as 5 sexual partners. Its hard for 1 guy to be superior in all facets of life than 5 other guys.

So now man must live with this torment that the sum of her past is greater than anything he can provide himself. Prior to the 68'ers, this wasn't a mental/spiritual anguish men had to endure.

>>24626412
And men? Do they lose the "pair-bond" ability too ?

>>24626416
I don't think its quite the same, but I'd say yes

>>24626412
Sluts have always existed, in quite considerable numbers. There just wasn't any phones back so it was hard to verify anything. I heard some gramps talk about this. Back in his way there was pretty much no way to know wether your partner was cheating, male and female.

>>24626412
> If you want to see a man in a quandary, place him between two women with each of whom he has a secret understanding, and see what a fool he looks. But put a woman in similar circumstances between two men, and the results will be even more remarkable; you will be astonished at the skill with which she cheats them both, and makes them laugh at each other. Now if that woman were to show the same confidence in both, if she were to be equally familiar with both, how could they be deceived for a moment? If she treated them alike, would she not show that they both had the same claims upon her? Oh, she is far too clever for that; so far from treating them just alike, she makes a marked difference between them, and she does it so skilfully that the man she flatters thinks it is affection, and the man she ill uses think it is spite. So that each of them believes she is thinking of him, when she is thinking of no one but herself.

Life starting august 2021? Disappointing. Realizing that you've been gone for exactly four years now, which is the time we had together? And possibly having more than a few decades left of life without you? It fills me with unimaginable dread.

I've tried seeing other people. It didn't do shit! kek. I don't understand how other people can't move on so fast. I won't daddle on it. I miss you a lot a lot a lot. Movies tell that kind of stories. I've also read about this in books, but I always thought it was some poetic shit. I never believed that feelings could get so strong that they could suffocate someone until it happened to me.

I can say with absolute confidence that there is nothing in this world I want more than you. It was the case yesterday, it is the case today, and it will be the case tomorrow. I love you, more than I love myself, more than I love my own parents, more than anyone I can think of. It's fine if nobody understands what's going on inside of my head. You are my special person, my special girl. My very own.

When my cousin was over, I mentioned how I missed school. She, however, misheard me, and thought I said that I missed her. She got a little pouty when I clarified what I meant. That was kind of cute; almost made me forget how evil women are.

Fellas my edge session was unsuccessful and now I have to go read a book for 6 hours. How do I sublimate unused cum into brainpower? Do I like, hold a plank or something?

I really need to finish that book on chakras.

“Guys I think that would be real funny”, “just collapse on the floor and turn into a slobbering mess”, “just cry it all out”, “1234. Innocent_Enna21”, “blotch”, “rostrum”, “PARTY CHAT”, “Searches Related To Door Knob”, “fucking door knob door handle bizarre insertion fucking bedpost vacuum fuck bed post objects gear shift lamp bedpost humping bed post vacuum cleaner masturbation”, “1 2 3 4 5 … 10 Next”, “JUICY FARTS!!!”, “HOT BITCHES AND BALL PYTHONS”, “ICARUS WINGS AT HOOTERS”, “it’s me dj khaled and i have come to reap the sinners of pop music with my dope ass beats”, “immortal in the biblical sense like deuteronomy”, “fight the moon munchers go beep boop boop bop beep”, “omega triple axel dodge dance”, “pronto buster artificial ass juice or spaghetti christ”, “scoobert doobert new bert john hurt cool kurt ya real nice kurt ya”, “stone trash receptacles that are usually outside macdonalds”, “onto my throbbing bungholio”, “wouldnt that be funny”, “man I just wanna fuck”, “Beautiful tattoo artist Nip Slip Snapchat Leaks”, “CHEESY LOBSTER FRIES”, “I’ve watched all of his stupid fuckall movies everytime”, “suggest some garbage like Boyhood or Before Fuckall or something”, “Save so much more with W+ With free delivery + gas savings + video streaming, this is the ultimate way to Walmart”, “The Winners at War immunity necklace had a regal and prestigious design”, “befitting the all-winners season”, “What a timeless classic”, “all lasting slants”, “How should I put it em dash and I think it’s my duty, for this reason, to do a kind of a public suicide em dash of myself as a popular comedian or whatever”, “Okay, now you have a book on Lenin’s texts”, “alphabetic-numeric correspondence”, “Art, in almost all senses, should primarily be understood as a type of inverted Oulipian metaphysics”, “BEN FOLDS MUSIC VIDEO REACTION AND ANALYSIS BY A PSYCHOLOGIST GONE WILD GONE SEXUAL”, “OVER THE TOP REACTIONS OUTLOOK EMAIL OWEN WILSON”, “spoofing”, “nice juicy herbal honey sauce all over the bacon yum”, “zuckerberg was there in the buttery flesh”, “just how i like it”, “nice and sloppy and juicy and greasy”

I would like to propose a hypothetical situation: instead of writing, what if I were to develop a language that could only be signified through the expressions and physical sub-pixel positions of Yoshi, the fictional green dinosaur and main character in Nintendo’s Super Mario World 2: Yoshi’s Island, originally released for the Super Nintendo Entertainment System in 1995. Without being too reductive, the phonetic structure of the language would essentially be determined by a number of various patterns that Yoshi can perform, such as egg-positioning angles, short hops, and whether or not Baby Mario is riding him. Yet despite this, what I think is important to note here is that the structure of the language that I have created is based on what Yoshi does, which means that the nature of the way that the language presents itself (through Yoshi) is extremely pragmatic because it can only exist within the confines of each level of Yoshi’s Island and, more importantly, within the confines of Yoshi. In this sense, Yoshi is truly an avatar for the language that is created by us. This means that we understand what Yoshi is in terms of language, but we can also understand Yoshi in terms of his own gestures. I argue that this is precisely the way that we should perceive language in the sense that it is an avatar of us, which means that we can successfully become disinterested in the language itself. We can distinguish that Yoshi’s gestures and positions create words and essentially meaning, but we can also distinguish that Yoshi’s gestures are simply gestures. A similar dichotomy happens in Jean-Paul Sartre’s first novel when his protagonist (Antoine) realizes that he can distinguish a table as a complete object, but also as individual slabs of wood that are separate from their function (or teleology) as a table. In the novel, this causes a type of profound existential dread for Antoine, which is why the french title of the novel is La Nausée (literally translated as Nausea). Yet at this point, I’d argue that, at least with language, this type of deconstructive viewpoint has positive connotations in terms of actually tracking why we utilize language in the first place, which would, in turn, unravel language as something considered deconstructive. This, of course, is the type of paradoxical thinking we see when we look at the work of someone like Hegel or a few of the other German Idealists like Schelling. However, instead of traditionally utilizing Hegelian dialectics, what if we were to attach the process of deconstruction to the dialectic itself, creating a new type of philosophical framework altogether? What kind of peculiarities would arise from that ineffable sludge of ontogeny we keep slapping adjectives on to? What egg of truth emanates from the clear reflective sheen of language? And what asemic glyphs remain once semantic meaning slips below the surface of our souls?

I've started going on my daily walks again and my anxiety has dropped dramatically. Don't underestimate or outright forget about the importance of vitamin D and light exercise! If you've been struggling with passive anxiety like me, especially haunted by cringe memories, try giving the daily walk around the neighborhood a try. The path I traverse takes about 30-35 minutes to walk but I'm a fast walker, so it's really like 45-50 minutes of distance walked. I highly recommend it for improve mental health. Plus it's good for thinking and creativity -- Beethoven went for daily two hour strolls.

Are three 1000+ page books too many to be reading in tandem?

you can have my isolation
you can have the hate that it brings

>>24626882
i walk maniacally at least four miles a day usually twice that plus i go for a 5k run a couple times a week, and yeah i am highly susceptible to anxiety and intrusive cringe thoughts. u know what can also be good is smoking weed. the next day ur so calm the whizzing whirring part of ur brain constantly spewing out cringe just goes much more calmly and peacefully, but that said, u have to hit the right balance, cuz if u blaze shit that's too potent some infused shit, u might start getting paranoid and depressed. i had that last night, i was like oh fuck this is making me miserable i am not smoking more weed, but this morning i'm soooo relaxed and mellow i'm like gotta smoke more often.

Pawg in yoga shorts in front of me at church. She was even doing stretches that was showing off her body. It was difficult to concentrate.

>>24626982
she wants the d

>>24626993
she wants a church simp to "man up" and raise her three kids

>>24626993
She was actually looking back at me and smiling a few times. Also, she was bouncing, leaning forward, etc. I was concentrating on not getting erect in church.

>>24627001
they all mostly do that to advertise their hot bodies

>>24626982
What kind of heretical Jezebel would desecrate a House of God with "yoga shorts" .. do not fall for her wily plots dear anon .. beneath that polyester is snakeskin.

I wish there were a way to articulate this sentiment without it seeming crudely sexual, or fetishistic, or like something that is meant to be funny. I just want to give voice a delicate aesthetic emotion. Something fragile, resting lightly on the imagination, like a snowflake. I was just thinking how strangely endearing toes are – I like to gaze at my lover’s sometimes. They are round, cute, plump. Like soft little bubbles. It gives me these protective feeling. Like something so vulnerable must be cherished and defended against everything harsh and cruel in the world. It irks me that there are all these barriers preventing me from transmitting this filling to another person unpolluted. The air between me and another person’s mind is thick with polluted connotations. The words acquire unwanted associations while in transit.

>>24627071
*transmitting this feeling, rather

>>24627075
Yeah that seemed a bit dental to be right for a footfag post

>>24627071
nothing wrong with being sexual. dont be guilty about what you love.
Mon panache!

>>24627084
Oh there’s nothing wrong with it. I just wish this kind of erotic tenderness wasn’t always something that had to be laced with filth or humour or irony

>>24627088
It truly doesn't unless you seek to avoid scorn, and in seeking to avoid scorn, you crush yourself. It's difficult, and i understand the frustration. Every part of someone you love can be erotic, cute, healthy, cherished. I enjoyed reading what you said. I think a lot of suffering and conflict is life is born from the struggle between the desires we hold and the desires of others that tyrannize, and how we tyrannize over ourselves to meet other drives. I wish i had a good answer for how to do this without difficulty. Life is battle, better to fight for what you love.

>>24627096
Thank you anon. You might have cut right to the hear of the matter. I am too concerned about what other people think of me. I am very sensitive. When I express something near and dear to me, and other people mock it, I feel crushed. So I barely ever express what I’m thinking or feeling. I bottle everything up inside myself until it becomes intolerable. Very perceptive of you! Thank you for the revelation anon, unironically. You have genuinely helped me. Thank you for your kind words

>>24627110
there is prudence in caring, but it must be prudence for a purpose, and not one that betrays. I just re-read cyrano de bergerac and if you are a romantic i rec giving it a look too, can be read in a sitting.

>>24627120
Oh, thank you anon, I will check it out. I remember watching the movie Roxanne as a kid. I had no idea it was based on that!

I post in many voices. I change cadence and punctation and opinion constantly. I start threads and argue against myself. You'll never know it's me. The powers will never learn my voice.

>>24627207
well i post in many posts and people seem to think that they are talking to different people when half the time its me

I worry I'm going to hate my book's fanbase. That means I have a fanbase at all, which would be life changing, but goddamn if I cant see into the cursed crystal ball about it.

Picture this, I'm sitting at some con wearing a Legend of the Overfiend shirt, schmoozing with whoever I'm lucky enough to lure to my booth with a shitload of free stickers, snacks, and pens. Then it happens; they arrive. Lumbering and corpulent, hideous not by genetics alone but by sumblimating monsterous reality, they immediately let out an audiable breathy shriek. I need to remain composed but there is no way to resist a psychic assualt of that magnitude. They rush over, destroying all the good will I cultivated in a blur of neon gyrations and body odor, while I resign myself to the invitable deluge.

Memes. So many fucking memes. I love memes, but these arent the organic kind, they're the manufactured kind that completely ignore the subtext of my fucking book, but engage in the gawdy surface aesthetics. Quotable moments spammed rapid fire. Some kind of cursed reference to a pop culture thing that horrifies me when I research it. Asking me what I was thinking when I wrote it. I've prepared for this. Worst of all? They want a picture and a hug. Not the woman, as awful as she may be, the a man. A smelly bearded effeminate man wearing his pin-based ideology in lieu of a personality, chittering like a cenobite. As we wraps his heavy but paradoxically weak grip around me and pulls me close, I can smell piss and old cum. I hate pictures, I hate this moment, and I hate this man, but I must smile. And so I do, with lifeless eyes and a thousand yard stare.

And then I roast them. I write something new and fucking roast them. Get it published, directly reference what happen, and then suddenly my inbox errupts. They loved it. They post it on reddit. They fucking loved it. There is no winning here.

>>24627232
>chittering like a cenobite
Cenobites don't chitter anon. Maybe don't use words that you don't know what they mean?

>>24627234
Pretty sure it does. Chittering means making a twittering or chattering sound. This dude is literally named Chatterer. Stretch? Maybe. Close enough in my opinion.

Does child and foot share an etymology?

hachimi

My dog always barks when I kiss my wife. I think he's jealous.

>>24627277
She got that dog in her.

lot of anons here

>>24627283
The opposite: he's mad that I'm kissing her. He lived with me before she did and I got him as a rescue, so he has some abandonment issues. But every time I kiss my wife he's fucking pissed. Doesnt even like me joking about it.

>>24627244
No, it's just παῖς (pais- child) and πούς (pous- foot or leg) have different vowels that are difficult to render, so paedo/pedo and pod/pus/podes trip English speakers up. Foot does come from the same root as pes in Latin or pous in Greek, but child is a Germanic word which likely has its origins in birth/womb cognates, which survives from Old English

>>24627289
I mean your dog would be jealous because he sees your wife as a female dog.

>>24627289
You should marry your dog instead

>>24627292
Pedo in Latin also means fart.

don't have a wife or a gf but tomorrow I am going to have a massage

I'm a pedophile. I love to fart.

Homosexuality exists on a lot of human cultures, but it is only on white cultures that it has developed to become a weapon of communism, just like eyes in multicellular organisms, this is a common theme within white culture.
The politics are a tool for communism, the art is a tool for communism, anti communism is a tool for communism, all ideology within white society ultimately leads to communism. And as we all know, communism doesn't work, yet, nobody wonders what is happening here, the most daring will simply blame the jews

>>24627297
No, my dog is jealous because he's a gay faggot and wants me to kiss him, unfortunately. He's scared of my wife, but he's also mad she took my attention.

>>24627299
Nah, he's got no assets.

>>24627306
Damn I'm so autistic. I remember giving girls massages in school multiple times, but it never occurred to me that it was sensual.

What language has the most aesthetically pleasing word for foot? Nabokov liked noga and its diminutive form nozhka, I think. He wasn't keen on Fuß or foot. He might have liked the French pied. I can't remember. Personally I think Fuß is nicer than foot. The Japanese ashi isn't too bad. 'Hadashi' is a nice pleasant word for bare-legged/barefoot.

>>24626898
Could be worse, could be 25+ books of various multi-hundred page length both physical and digital in format and the stack keeps getting bigger all of the time.

I got good at massages because my mom made me massage her almost every day, then I started massaging my classmates in school. There was a time that I wanted to become masseuse as a career.

>>24627320
in xhosa foot is unyawo. nice soft round sound. like a ripe fruit. noga also delicious.

>>24627303
Not exactly, it's "i fart" from pēdēre (to fart) but that's a borrowing from πέρδομαι (pérdomai- the ruder way to say fart compared to bdéō)
Likewise podex (asshole) in Latin comes from "fart" even though it sounds like it should come from "foot"

First time I read Blackwood it was the Wendigo and then the Willows right after, which were both not only amazing but (to me) a whole new experience of this kind of horror.
Since then I've read about 20 more Blackwood stories chasing that same experience but they merely range from 'decent' to 'good enough'. None of his other shit ever approaches the quality of those two first stories.
Got any suggestions?

>>24627319
well, I meant I'm gonna have a real deep tissue medical non-sexual massage

>>24627343
Remember to hydrate

>>24627331
That is a good one! South Africa is full of pleasant surprises.

>>24627343
Make sure it's a strong man, not a woman.

>>24627310
>on
"In" ESL. In.

>>24627320
Irish for foot is cos, sounds like cuss like when Americans are too scared to say curse in "curse word"
Barefoot is cosnochta, sounds like cuss NUK tah, literally "naked foot"

>>24627361
Oh that's awesome. Thanks anon
>Americans are too scared to say curse in "curse word"
Is this actually the reason they say "cuss"? Lmao. I always thought "cuss" sounded fucking stupid.

>>24627353
yeah whatever, i am right

>>24627373
No, you're wrong. Learn to speak my language properly.

>>24627341
>The Willows
>Amazing
I will never understand this opinion. It's an awful short story.

>>24627368
Afaik yeah it's a minced oath like
>dang it all to heck
>cheese and rice
>shut the front door
American self censorship is bizarre

When I listen to music, I imagine I'm in the far future in my spaceship looking into the expanse of space.

>>24627379
you can understand me and i don't care about anything else

All the backrooms liminal space shit permanently ruined Gmod maps. In the past, people would make weird, unsettling shit just for its own sake. The paranoia and insomnia maps are a good example of this, just straight 2010s-era weird dreamlike horror with no attachment to anything else. Now it's all fucked. Every other map has to have a ripoff of the poolrooms with that fucking tiled spiral staircase in the middle or a fucking backrooms section with yellowed wallpaper and a bigass arcade of drywall arches because that's what was in the Kane Pixels videos. Everything has these dumbass little liminal space tumblr page knockfoffs. Very rarely do people try to make genuinely weird shit anymore, they just ape something that's been done a million times already.

>>24627399
>Tfw just started album to paint spaceships

>>24627351
it's a strong woman

why does it always feel so much better to jerk it during night time than day time?

I hate writing for anyone but myself.
I hate having to constantly be watchful of my words because people these days are so delicate that even the wrong synonym might tether them over the edge.
I hate that every interaction feels like a navigating a minefield where the slightest deviation from acceptable norm is tantamount to blowing years of kinship up into dust and echoes.
I hate words' near uselessness in describing reality and the Truth therein

>>24627430
i've always been more of a morning stroker t b h

>>24627435
I share your feelings anon

I'm a man in love

>>24626396
i feel this way too, anon.

>>24627453
Tell me about your love

I have whore fatigue. I'm tired of seeing all this shit day-in-and-day-out everywhere you look of vapid, stupid sluts doing literally anything and everything they can possibly conceive of to get cheap attention.

I'm tired of every single comment section under every garbage whore post on the internet being full of dumbass horny males trying to flirt or posting dozens of heart and fire emojis.

I'm tired of whores.

>>24627453
You'll get over it.

>>24627470
Focus on the bros.

>>24627472
No, faggot. I will not.

>>24627474
You're a lost cause.

>>24627470
I never see any of this shit you’re talking about. Maybe stop browsing twitter and Instagram faggot

>>24627476
I can be sick of slots and slot behavior and not be a fucking faggot. Homo.

>>24627470
>browses instragram
>gets mad it's full of instathots and instasimps
browse sth else maybe idk

>>24627481
>uses instagram to look at thots
>gets mad when there are thots on his for you page

>>24626285
I also got a The Books CD for her.

>>24627462
He is everything I want in man

>>24627517
What do you want in a man?

>>24627521
trillionaire werewolf on parole for murder

i love my cat so fucking much. i'd invade troy a million times for her and her blue gem eyes.

>>24627547
I'd holocaust 6 million Jews for Kitty. I'd nuke all of Gaza from orbit for Kitty. I'd rape an entire preschool for Kitty.

>>24627537
...who cares for you like your mother

Therapist said that I'm biodiverse.

>>24626276 (OP)
any advice for a 43 year old anon going to college in the fall (majoring in world history) and how to deal with zoomers?

>>24627607
ignore them? focus on your work

>>24627607
Fuck em in the butt

>>24627607
>Majoring in world history
Enjoy your meme degree.

>>24627607
If you're 43 and haven't figured out how to handle young adults yet I don't think any amount of advice can help you. Most broccoliheads are fine anyway, the internet just gives a distorted view of reality.

>>24627621
Whatever. All I know its there so I can continue writing.

>>24627626
Nah, I can deal with them one at a time. Just not hordes of them. And especially zoomer females.

>>24627627
Might as well major in philosophy too while you're at it, LMAO.

>>24627616
Lol

>>24627636
Maybe I just might. You know, self care as always. First and foremost.

You never think of me at all.

>>24627689
You don't know me.

>>24627631
Dude you're 43, you're the adult in the room, who gives a shit, just be yourself and you'll figure it out.

It's 95F outside. Guess I'll be staying in my room. At least after Tuesday it drops back to ~70F for an entire week.

>>24627607
jus
give them
tha ol
quick tilt head back greet
and say

SUP

FAGGOTS

an then
dont care wut
those
FAGGOTS
say
back

“When asked his opinion of Welsh Nationalism,” it has been said of Dylan Thomas, “he replied in three words, two of which were ‘Welsh Nationalism.’”

>>24627815
welsh nationalism NOW -- dylan thomas

>>24627692
Then I’m not talking about you, am I.

>>24627872
Be more specific next time?

just read someone reframe mind-body dualism as "quantum consciousness" lol, i'm so done

I had a dream where Jeff Bezos was sucking my dick
Can anyone interpret it for me

>>24627607
Claim to be a visiting professor doing research at the university library archives and fuck undergrad pussy

>>24627903
It's your subconscious telling you to invest in crypto.

>>24627903
That wasn't a dream, you accidentally upgraded to Amazon Prime+

>>24627874
Shut the fuck up next time.

>>24627906
Yet they still didnt send me my book I ordered 7 months ago???

>>24627910
Fuck you.

Bitcoin hit $120k but I invested my portfolio on darknet coke which got intercepted at customs. You can still get crack for $5 in Philadelphia but it's mostly baking soda. I traded my EBT balance this month for half its value in cash at a bodega. I'll have to live off the fries I take from DoorDash orders that I do on a hoverboard.
I wish had more raw milk since I can't stomach solid food when I'm on uppers. Pasteurization is nutritional circumcision. My car door handle broke so I have to unlock the trunk and climb in through the back, or leave the window open and risk the change in my cup holder getting stolen. I'd be good at spelunking but I've already got a hobby of pacing back and forth during the witching hour. I watch femdom and then act extra misogynistic in the real world to settle the score. I am not immune to propaganda. I miss when politics was just voting for the more racist guy. Now there's war between the DMT entities I've contacted and they all make a compelling sales pitch. At least baseball season starts soon. I listen on the radio to interpret the numbers they say which I believe have an underlying significance pertaining to my destiny. But until then there's misogyny to do and immigration to stop.

Women are lucky most men are horny dogs because most them lack seductive skills

He was a certified male manipulator who treated me terribly. Why do I still miss him?

I'm worried that if I ever do start dating, me being a touch starved loner will make it easy for women to manipulate me. The other day a cute girl sat next to me on public transport and her hair brushed my shoulder for half a second and I fantasized an entire life with her until I got off at my stop. This isn't normal or healthy but I have no way out of it.

>>24627951
You answered your own question.

>>24627956
its okay to be passionate in love just make sure what you love is worthy

I lost my virginity at 22 to an 18 year old virgin. The relationship didn’t last, naturally, but I got all the validation and support that I’d always wanted. Yet I didn’t change at all. I’m still miserable, and I feel alienated from the world. I think it’s telling that I feel the most balanced when I’m sitting on a park bench early in the morning with no one around.

>>24627948
Who? Women or men?

>>24626479
A simp wrote this

I have an Award-losing smile

>>24627750
Being myself is the worst thing I could possibly be. You have no idea what you just said.

>got banned from my home board for dubious reasons
heh, whatever, I don’t even care!
anyways, been digging into some neecha lately. God he’s such an entertaining writer even if you don’t agree w him.
>every moral mandate tattles on the person wishing to impose it
>objective truth isn’t real
You mean that objective truth you’re trying to impose
>Slave morality, the weak fear the strong and subvert them
I don’t understand ressentiment or really how the power-tables or whatever you call them got overturned.
>inb4 Christianity
Okay but how does it take root in the upper echelon of society?

>>24627607
no one cares about "non-traditional" aka old students, every class i did in undergrad had some old ass dude in it, one was some wall street guy coming back to do a econ undegrad for some reason, another had some ex con who had been locked up, there was some dude who had been in the navy forever, etc. there was one old dude who would smoke outside and chat up the undergrad girls, college is more like being at work than at "school" in the sense that it's big mix of people with different life circumstances and goals.

>>24628057
This post made me smile, Anon, I want you to know that.

>>24628072
Neitzche is not about theory or reasons. Its about art and process. His reason and theories should not be yours.

https://ia803405.us.archive.org/32/items/thus-spoke-zarathustra/Thus%20spoke%20Zarathustra.pdf

Read the noontide chapter specifically. this captures the heart of the matter more than any argument

your race is old and decrepit, your extinction can't come soon enough

>>24628057
I have an award-winning bad smile.

>>24628094
hey thanks man! I’ve been holding off on Zarathustra bc I’ve heard it can be kind of opaque and easy to misinterpret w out baseline familiarity of his other work.
I appreciate it :D

>>24628054
Did you tell her you were a virg or you were just bluffing the whole time

I'[m atching this anime called

>>24628200
We knew each other for a long time.

>>24628208
Called what?

>>24628221
It starts with a G. Like Gothranki or something. It's about trash people. New one for the season.

>>24627965
So you think it’s because he was manipulative?

>>24628239
Duh!

>>24628242
I fucking hate when people use that word. It isn’t 2005. You sound like an idiot.

>>24628160
>w out baseline familiarity of his other work.
Tbph a lot of the jokes you'll miss out on are history of philosophy and German puns, and yeah if you're a German philologist with an interest in western philosophy, that is part of the fun, but that kind of fun is generally not why people learn the history of philosophy or German, so most people don't get them, and the ones that do tend to be the kind of people who light up when you mention stamp collecting

>>24628247
I was using it ironically. Forgive me?

I miss my wife and children. They'd be 15 years old now.

Ragtime

>>24628260
they'd all be? kek!

>>24628265
You're hilarious.

My senses print bronze aortas.

I don't know what to do, so I'm doing what I'm told. I got nothing more to say; I'll say anything at all. If you're chewing on my ear, then I'm biting on your tongue. I don't want to wait for love's permission.

>>24628280
Gay.

>>24628271
Hmmm. Prints bronze? Print implies process, bronze is cast but not printed. Print a bronze chunk of a heart: a passage way, an artery. Senses, homophone for cents. Pennies are bronze. I've got it! This means you're advertising your services for pennies on the dollar, so liquid can flow from the heart; cum. You a hooker.

I'm thinking about my four fathers.

Thoughts?
https://matbrown.org/

I'm a pseud: I read through Portrait of the Artist and found the sheer poetry of it somewhat tedious to wade through. It was beautiful, but very opaque at times. First time seeing prose that completely dumbfounded me both with its skillful execution and meaning. I'm gonna read some Murakami to let my mind rest.

Fuck it. Fuck it all. Fuck it all up. Fuck it all up completely. Fuck it all up completely and watch it burn. Fuck it all up completely and watch it burn to the ground. Fuck it all up completely and watch it burn to the ground and scatter the ashes. Fuck it all up completely and watch it burn to the ground, scatter the ashes, and fuck you.

>>24628286
Polyandrous cult? Or just the leader is the only one allowed wives and none of those are allowed children?
>>24627410
>Tfw anon doesn't ask how painting spaceships is going

>>24628334
>and fuck you
Well, now I'm not doing it.

>>24628341
My ancestors. It's not a cult. I'm having ancestral thoughts.

>>24628348
forefathers

I want to get drunk but I’m only getting sleepy.

>itt
>"thoughts"

I feel like I didn’t work enough this past week, I’m not moving fast enough. I’m fucking 29 and I barely make enough to pay debt a bills, can’t even take a ho out. I gotta make at least $75k before I can start living life. Fucking hell man.

>>24628091
Its a line I stole from Deltatune

>>24628380
Your secret is safe with me.

>>24628383
pantu

>>24628364
Fixed it. Solution was drinking more

>>24628391
Fuck I meant pantsu.

I should've went with an engineereering deegree.

>>24628434
Drink in different places. I'm partial to the shower and the garden.

>>24628438
I should have spent the money my degrees cost on a house, rented it out to faggots, scaled out a real estate empire, mortgage it heavily for cocaine and gunpla, then die a bloated wired corpse in my museum of half finished robot models.

>>24628440
Beer garden. Garden beer

>>24628449
I'm telling you, if you ever feel shitty grab a drink of your choice, go sit in a shitty fucking lawn chair, and listen to some sports talk radio or moody music of your choice. Works wonders. I do the same thing in the shower; revelational. Only way to beat it? Cigarette in the early fall morning before work, right when the sun's peeking over the horizon, and the daze of last night's sleep hasnt quite worn off, but the warm coffee hasnt kicked in. If you're lucky a cat or a bird or a squirrel or something will walk by. That's what it's all about.

>>24627940
Nice stuff.

[lisp] Welcome to niggers
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vDIaaYFBrb4

Me and my parents went to this new Thai place to order food to-go and while sitting near the entrance, this white woman in a nurse scrubs and sweatshirt entered as well and for some reason the one restaurant server didn't see her. She kept waiting and waiting, I kept looking at her and then back to the server, hoping she'd finally notice her, but nothing -- someone even came in after the nurse and was helped! I wanted to say something so bad but choked up, and eventually the nurse customer left. I felt so bad.

When I got home, I told my mother, and, typical of older generations, she said, "Not like you work there, she could've spoken up for herself. You think too much." She's probably right. Still, I feel guilty about it. Just a simple, "oh we ordered already" would have sufficed.

>>24626276 (OP)
I think i might take some urban planning classes too

>>24628629
Planning for what?

>>24628641
Eh. I got plans alright.

>>24626276 (OP)
i purchased eight books today, yet feel sickly; maybe tomorrow i'll feel not so...

Trump talking about removing homeless from the Capital makes him sound like those YA dystopian villains.

>>24626276 (OP)
I think it is unfotunate that people are letting the symbolic gold of the Arab gulf states and the city of Dubai paramount among them as this agglomeration of everything that is low, ordinary, tawdry, garish, ugly, disgusting, base, parvenu, tasteless, and corrupt about our new World CultureTM pass them by.

>>24628692
It was a fairly common policy in major American cities of the 19th and early 20th centuries.

>>24626276 (OP)
If I work through a poem or two of les fleurs du mal in the original language a day, do you believe my French reading aptitude will eventually improve?

I'm considering an art history degree, then after that I'll make a wish for the zombie apocalypse.

>>24628692
disgusting

impeach NOW

What I know least is my mind

dreamt of a duel in africa, my opponent spoke spanish. we stood on the same brick line before we retreated to shoot. we stood so close that we put our arms around one another and for a second i thought we might kiss. the africans and spaniards are both romantic people. he explained that we would turn on 'sien' and shoot on 'snipe'. in the dream i began to walk but woke before i heard the second word. my right eye is my weakness, i doubt i would have made it out alive.

you can never call me a pseud. i never claimed to be an intellectual. investigate my construction and you'll find hardly any thoughts at all.

>>24628759
Fart history

>>24628852
this anon falls down the stairs in well cleaned armor

I wish I was Alan Wake. Being a successful alcoholic writer seems comfy. Writing hardboiled slop seems comfy. Living in a nice NY apartment with my hot photographer wife seems comfy. She's a good wife and Barry is a great friend. The pacific northwest seems comfy too. Even shooting stuff possessed by shadow demons sounds comfy.
>>24628752
I'm gonna steal this idea from you. Assimil grew tiresome.

happy Monday everybodies .. may all beings be happy

What do you call it when something incapable of malice behaves in a manner which it logically should not, at your expense, and you end up emotionally attributing malice to it, even though you logically understand it can't be malicious?

Is it just anthropomorphism? Or is it something else?
Like I was trying to use a hand sanitizer bottle and it just wasn't coming out the way it logically should, and it pissed me off and emotionally made me feel as if the bottle were purposefully fucking with me despite being an inanimate object. I know the same can happen with animals, like if they're incontinent in old age and repeatedly pass stool in places they know they should not, someone might end up getting angry at the animal in thinking they're intentionally misbehaving, despite logically knowing they're incapable of malice.

>>24628991
In contemporary talk therapy psycho-babble, this would be called projection.

>>24628965
>unemployed friend at monday afternoon.
Anyways, you know any good mushroom picking spots?

>>24628965
How is the book anon? I read Coetzee’s Disgrace recently. Are you perhaps the recently liberated South African I spoke to before?

>>24629035
Not what that means.
T. herapist's relative and ocassional test subject.

>>24628965
Happy monday friend. I am barely alive but I appreciate the sentiment.

>>24629110
For the record. "Projection" is, iirc, the transplating of your personal feelings or situations into some other person or object.
Here is an example:
Anons Nephew is a five year old boy whose mother and father constantly hector and scold him over his behaviour. One time, while being taken care of by Anon for an afternoon, he began making declarations about how Anon was only allowed one cookie as dessert, and no matter how much Anon begged he would not get any more. Along with some other suspiciously toddler themed decrees on what anon is and is not allowed to do in a language identical to the one used by his father and mother.

>>24628991
Anthropomorphism, personification, something along those lines. More frustrating, my wife's retarded brother I live with hits me with the same feeling. He's a void; no thoughts. But I'll be damned if he doesnt use being retarded as an excuse to be an incredible asshole. Unfortunately he's so stupid it's impossible to tell. He legitimately COULD be that dumb, and when I've called him out, sometimes he is. The problem? Every indicator gets my neurons firing that it's intentional, because if a normal person was acting like that, there's no way it wouldnt be.

Once again I have consumed media about a cute vampire woman growing close to a human man and was left with a bittersweet want for a vampire gf as a result.
This is all. Thank you for your attention.

>>24629142
Ok I'll come clean, this was just me being angry my Nephew is using me to vent out his frustrations regarding his harridan mother and whipped castrato father. What am I to do, take this away from him? I'm not that cruel.
Guess I am projecting my (childhood) self on him, too.

>>24629052
yesya, just after rain in autumn time beneath forest pines you will find pine rings, very delicious when fried with butter. very slimy when not fresh.

>>24629055
yes same person. i have always held mixed feelings to coetzee's work. he feels on the horizon-line is something great but i am constantly bombarded with certain phrases and touches of language that i feel relay his imperferfect command of the english language. perhaps i am more harsh because he is the supposed voice for contemporary south africa. his voice is like voice. disgrace is perhaps the best example of this. all agree he is a highly functioning autistic. i lose all respect for a south african who flees to suburban australia, as he did. that retreat inevitably flavours his books everytime i read them. michael k is my favourite of his, but even then, something vital is missing.

>>24629161
I feel similarly about Australia’s contemporary ‘great author’, David Malouf, though for different reasons. I just find something about his whole view of life kitsch, even though there are seeds of undeniable greatness, or half-greatness, in his writing. I want to love him but can’t. His work is too infected with that saccharine quality particular to the older generation of Australia’s educated classes. Which is a shame, because there are flashes of genuinely morbid violence and eroticism.
As for Disgrace, I liked so many things about it but felt there was something a little patchwork or incomplete about it, or maybe its constituent parts failed to come together quite right. The fault lines were too obvious. Like I could see behind the text into the writing process. I don’t know if that makes sense.
>i lose all respect for a South African who flees to suburban australia, as he did.
Hmph! Don’t go parading that sentiment. I don’t want you dissuading your compatriots from coming over here. You already know my proclivities

>>24629161
And were you the anon who posted about the Xhosa word for foot earlier? Or is there a surfeit of based Afrikaners posting currently

>>24629150
There is only one vampfu and if it isnt Ceras from hellsing ultimate you have made the wrong choice.

>>24629153
He's just at the age where he's emulating the world around him and the draconian vibe of his parents. He's frustrated that he wants more cookies, but his caregivers use this as an inflection point to build structure, so when he sees you getting two cookies, he wants to see if he can limit you as his parents limited him. You get this. But the next step, solving it, requires critical thinking skills.

If you take the one cookie and break it in half, ask him if it's two cookies or one cookie. When he says one cookie, ask him why eating two parts of one cookie is different from eating two cookies; they're two things. Then, take two cookies, break them in half, and ask him if one half of two cookies counts as one cookie, or two cookies. Finally, assuming he hasnt lost his mind with cookie lust, ask him if he wants half a cookie now, or two cookies in 20 minutes. Get him to explain the answer, and make sure you tell him the truth: two cookies is four halves, but it requires him waiting. Why are you doing all this? To show him his parents rules arent arbitrary, they're about the quantity of snacks he can reasonably eat, rather than a decree that he can only have one. Over time these kinds of games will break his parents programming a bit. Cant help an impotent father or a harpy mother, but you can show him what they mean behind the scolding.

>>24629183
well said. most of his books feel like witnessing a scaffolded building. almost done, never quite.

>>24629188
strangely that wasn't me. there's a certain subsection of post-colonial white south african that fits right in here. i knew a few self-confessed lurkers before i actually came here. it's literally the only part of the internet i use besides soundcloud. everything else feels like peering into a strobe light. maybe i'm not alone in this.

About to finish reading a 500page book. Feels great
About to start reading a 800page book. Feels great

tfw from kazakhstan

tfw from mauritania

>>24629198
Thank you. That’s a very good way to put it. Maybe I will read Michael K. next. I also have Diary of a Bad Year lying around — and they have ‘Boyhood’ among other works at the university library. And ah, I wonder who it was.. it’s funny you say that. There is another South African I met on here who has become a very dear friend to me. Did you meet these other lurkers IRL? Or on other parts of the internet. Forgive me if the questions are tiresome!

>>24629205
What are your opinions on women? I also saw a show about food there; I'd fuck with that giant pile of meat and onions.

>>24629209
I hate em

>>24629208
i met them at bars in simon's town in cape town. best bars. full of literal old jaded sea dogs. all the best man.

>>24629227
Thanks anon, maybe I will visit those bars some day

>>24626276 (OP)
i hate social status. a little piece of that is envy that i'm usually at the bottom half of the pile, but even when i've found myself near the top i've hated it and spent a lot of my time trying to throw that status away, or using it to boost and defend pariahs because i hate the structure itself.
i don't know how to get over this. doing so is very important to having any kind of online presence outside imageboards, but i wouldn't know where to begin. every website is basically a status game and i don't want to play it.

>>24629281
>I hate social status.
It's a bit like saying: "I hate medical history records."

Almost went for a bowl of Honeycomb cereal for breakfast but last moment I decided to opt for Eggo waffles with butter. I've been contemplating if I should buy syrup next time I'm at the store. It's one of those things that isn't used for much, but when you do eat something it can be used for, basically waffles or (mini-)pancakes, you're damn glad you do have it.

>>24629281
Clout is accumulated over time and online it's gatekept by legacy. I struggle online as well; this is my home, and if I call StarDork420 a fag for a faggy opinion, they leverage it into a reason to disbar you. And so I dont post anywhere else. Real life isnt like that. I show up, make small talk, put people at ease, and they'll remember me for who I am, even if I'm a dick. Either cultivate value over time or kick the door down and demonstrate it. Both are the same. Online? They want new posters to be ritualistically humiliated, and the only after an immense performative dance are they willing to acknowledge you, and that dont jive with me, because I havent accumilated goodboy points, but I'm still knowledgable and deserving respect. Online is a tough one, I'll give you that.

>>24629281
>. doing so is very important to having any kind of online presence outside imageboards,
y u want that tho

>>24629356
why be so fixated on status then? unless theres unavoidable professional / familial pressures to uphold status, it shouldnt really concern you. are you still in high school?

>>24629281
why be so fixated on status then? unless theres unavoidable professional / familial pressures to uphold status, it shouldnt really concern you. are you still in high school?

Schopenhauer's books can be read really fast once your mind is properly attuned to his thought. Some passages require deeper thinking but some are real page turners but in a good way.

I'm 31. I've realized that having a child is what you do if you don't know what to do with your life. It installs meaning and purpose while completely making the self obsolete. Having a child is accepting defeat.

Any fellow aus anons here? How do you cope?

I had a really bad case of phimosis as a kid and had to undergo surgery, and even after, I had to do stretch training for about a year until I could finally fully retract my foreskin. I was too young to remember what exactly they did, I just remember my penis hurting really bad afterwards. Years later, like 15 years or so, I discovered that I don't have a frenulum anymore. When I touch the back of my penis, I feel the sensation of being touched, but I barely feel any pleasure. It sucks. I cannot imagine what being circumcised must feel like. My heart goes out to all my jewtilated brethren out there.

>>24629506
>a cheesedick's misdirected pity

>>24629481
I'm 33 and going to have a kid in the near future. Not only have I specifically not given up, I know exactly what I'm doing, and I'm going to work twice as hard to give my kid everything I didnt have. Why am I having a kid? I firmly believe I can be a great dad. I want to write them stories about anything they can imagine. I want to teach them to throw a hook and cook my ma's legendary homemade spaghetti sauce. I want to be there while they become someone, teach them to get up when they fall, and I want to enjoy the process as much as I can.

What's more meaningful than that?

>>24629491
Hello fellow Aus anon. Cope with what exactly?

>>24629506
same as me; first time i came my foreskin bled. the suits sentenced me to compulsory circumcision. my cock was inspected by a man from another town and deemed unsatisfactory. he had a cook of possible surgeries: one image showed a cock that had had a V shape cut taken out a top. like a snake's mouth. i cried when i saw it. i got the regular semetic castration instead. i lost my powers that day.

>>24629513

It's not that it's not meaningful, on a human scale it is probably the most meaningful things you can do.

You don't get this overwhelming feeling that your own life is going to be over? That everything you enjoy personally and your own pursuits are dead. If it's not related to the health and wellbeing of your child it's a distant second? Everything you enjoy and feel strongly about immediately becomes surface level and fleeting.

Im honestly not trying to shit on raising a child, these are just things I think about.

>>24629513
there's something soulless about having a kid and not needing them to work the farm. short of that it should be an accident

damn it's already 75F outside, it's making me consider skipping my morning walk

>>24629523
Very confusing to read post but you have my condolences.

>>24629545
I went for a swim today, and the temperatures have fallen to around 20-21C, when a week or so ago they'd been pushing 25-26C. Terrible.

>>24629535
The opposite. I need to refine what I want. I need to choose what matters to me and work with purpose so I'm able to accomplish my goals. I need to shed the the excess and ascend into apex form. I can still drink a bottle of scotch on the couch with my bros watching UFC, I just need to plan it first. I enjoy so many things, what am I missing out on? I can still cook. I can still write. I can still read and play vids. I can still watch sports. Now I get to share my passions with someone else and show them why I love the things I do. Like sports, some of my fondest memories with my old man were watching baseball and football on tv, while I asked him questions about what was going on while we ate white mac and cheese with hotdogs. He even let me stay up late from time to time to watch the lakers. I'm excited to learn what my kid likes.

>>24629536
Hey I'm going to make them do chores from a young age. Gotta teach good work ethic early.

I am tired of the "Read more! Here’s the top 100 books!" approach. As if you could not reason unless you consume a ton of books, treating knowledge like trophies instead of tools. It assumes value lies in accumulation. Thinking this way, and setting extreme reading goals, I ended up with the biggest reading block. Sometimes I just get overwhelmed by how vast the world is, I get lost in all the information.

What's the significance of Lot's wife turning into salt when she looked back at Sodom?

>>24629555

It all just sounds like a massive cope, respectfully. I live a boring life by all traditional metrics. Work 40-50 hours a week, make 120k a year and the only reason I keep going is because of the very comforting fact that I can fuck off and do whatever I want whenever I choose to, and I likely will before I'm 40 at least for a few years. Taking that freedom away feels like the ultimate self sabotage.

On your deathbed I believe you'll be happier for the choices you'll have made but trading that for possibility of limit experience is odd to me.

>>24629150
A man can dream.

>>24629555
re: soulless
not a critique/judgement, just some philosophical ranting; but, i wasn't being entirely ironic.
we are hardwired to breed, and that should be enough. and i guess for many it still really is.
the second you start weighing your options, and make a decision based on it being something you think you'd "want", there are new moral implications in play.
we are abstract beings, and you are allowed to simply have kids without it being in your best interest. or even meaningful.
i don't know. lol

>post in a thread
>thread dies
The satisfaction of having the last word is far lesser than that of getting (You)s

>>24629513
Erm you need to become a bitter lonely alcoholic and fail to get published instead because uhhh it's literary and shit

>>24629583
>>24629555
and on that note, my friend just had his second kid. he's never tried to rationalize it or anything. his wife wanted kids, that was all. he simply conceded and went with it. he was COOKED. and the funny thing is, now that they're turning into real human beings, he loves it

>>24629481
Bitter virgin cope.

>>24629598

Again, I don't argue the love and joy one gets from raising their children.

I can't get over the resignation of the self. The same way a fent addict lives to do more fentanyl. A parent lives to care for the child.

Is it really as simple as a commitment issue for me?

>>24628965
Im extremely listless atm

>>24629626
sure. the trick is to just do it and worry about it later. for anyone who isn't an idiot, you need perfect conditions and/or cope.

I'm NGMI
There was a minute or two there where it all seemed so easy. I'd learned all the talents I needed to put mediocre work into the world, and then I'd have made it.
But I see now that it's not enough. I can't put in the work to see it through. There's always something else demanding my time, always some little distraction that won't let me sit down and work. I'll never sit myself down and just get it done.

>>24629574
What do you dream about anon? I dream about legacy, leaving something in the world to prove I lived. I'm content enough to bbq at home on my beautiful grill and smoke a $20 cigar with a pbr. I have a house that could probably be bigger, that I share with my beautiful wife, and I drive a car that is absolutely shitty and could probably be better. I dont measure myself by my assets, and I dont dream of leaving it all behind to go live on a beach or acquiring something grand. I dream of being remembered. I dream of having a book with my name on it. I dream about instilling my values in someome else, and I dream they'll have the chance to use them in a way I never did.

Real talk, I'm a highly educated, highly qualified, highly competent guy. I had a high paying hell job in CRE I was massively over qualified for, and gave it up for a shit job at half the salary in a small town. My entire life I've been looked over, not because I cant do something, but because I've never been given the opportunity to try. And so I fight. My goal isnt the goal, at one point it was, but now my goal is the process of achieving goals. Like Camus, is sisyphus happy? My stance is, I am happy, but more than that, I push the boulder out of spite. Out of a fierce negation of apathy by absurdity. Life is absurd, I accept that, but I'll be damned if I wont push the boulder until it wears a path in the hill. Why? Again, spite. To prove to others it can be done, even if it never helps me.

>>24629583
You're right. It's tempting to feel bad because the world is fucked and I cant give them the life they deserve. But I believe in agency, even if the choices are small, and I choose to have a kid because I believe I can be a great parent. As the antihero all my life, it's the reconsiliation that ties together my past indescretions, and completes my arc to prove that no one is beyond redemption if they work hard enough.

>not believing your kids will be fine without you because they're baby apex predators
Shiggy, parents who have kids to prove something about themselves (usually that they're not their own parents and would do better) are inevitably disappointed when that little monkey develops a mind of their own

>>24629554
I came back fuggin' drenched in sweat :/

which suggests if I even try to leave the house later when it gets into the 90sF, I'll most likely die of heat stroke

>>24629481
Schopenhauer said reproduction is the ultimate purpose of every organism, and its strongest instinct; for only so can the will conquer death.
And to ensure this conquest of death, the will to reproduce is placed almost entirely beyond control of knowledge or reflection: even a philosopher, occasionally, has children.

Was at a funeral today and saw a cousin I've never seen. God is she hot

>>24629665
Oh hope you werent getting that from me. I'm the Patron Saint of Jackasses, God is absolutely going to give me a hellion that tests me as much as I tested my parents. My wife is best described as "impish" and grew up the exact same way. I fully expect them to get into fist fights, to yell at their teacher, to sneak out at night and smoke weed with their friends, and to challenge my authority. In fact, I'd be disappointed if they didnt. I just want to give them tools to handle anything that comes their way, and a support to lean on so they didnt have to learn the way I did, in blood and regret.

>>24629647
ngl u sound like a loser lol

>>24629686
>This anons face when he gets a Christian prep school student whose ambition in life is a modest filing job for a stationery supply company

Tom Waits is a god-tier songwriter.

>>24629695
Fuck's sake, this place is retarded and I'm bleeding gray matter each time I come here, day after day. If there's proof of the nonexistence of or our abandonment by God, this is it.

>>24629695
you forgot to call him unc

Anyone here lost their job or otherwise been significantly affected by President Trump's tariffs yet?

>>24629707
this board is unironically the best place on the internet

>>24629707
thats what i be sayin reading ur shitty as post lmao

all these people finding playing video games and meme traveling more fulfilling than having a kid is why the West is in decline

Is having sex with my aunt /lit ?

so are you lying whenever you don't start a post with "ngl"?

>>24629719
Yes, especially when she turns out to be your mom and the aunt thing was a familial lie

>>24629720
tru, no cap, fr fr, keepin' it one hunna, ong (on god, for you boomers)

>>24629715
asia has the same issue, dumdum

I hate that I love her. Ever since I've fallen in love with her my entire life has fallen apart. I thought I knew what I wanted from my life, I thought I had a vision for it and now it all seems unreal in her wake. I want to paint my life on her body.

>>24629725
kek heard a 54 y/o lady use on god the other day, fell in love a little

>>24629726
I didn't say only the West, anon

plus China already has a billion more people than there are US citizens

>>24629719
my aunt tried to bang me. she (was) super bang-able too. good thing i didn't because she would have told my mom much later. good luck retard

>>24629695
Some men are born losers. Some become losers because they never win. Others cant escape being losers, even when they do win, and make it everyone else's problem. Personally, if I try hard enough and long enough, I will win. It's inevitable. And sometimes winning is taking a big shot to the chin so you can land your counter with finality.

>>24629705
That's a possibility, they are going to catholic school like I did. But I'm more concerned with a consensus cultist who has tons of emotions they dont understand and is immunized against logic; my wife and I are cold robotic lizard people and that'd be the funniest outcome.

>>24629733
okay but when you specify the west it implies a comparison to the thing that isnt the west. not trying to give you a hard time, but get fucked

>>24629739
>cold robotic lizard people
Oh yeah you're getting a woowoo homeopath or some shit

>>24629734
your aunt tried to tell her sister that she had seduced her said sister's fucking son ?

>>24629727
Oh I know this feeling but for a man instead...!

>>24629739
>they are going to catholic school like I did
Why?

>>24629710
I hide more incel bait threads than I read discussions on literature. This place is a haven for contrarians who only know of the reputation this place had nearly ten years prior, and think they continue its legacy with this tripe they spew.

>>24629743
yea, because she's nuts

>>24629739
>I dream of being remembered
One English poet said to evoke posterity is to weep on your own grave.

>>24629727
You blew up your marriage for some woman you barely know.

>>24629742
Yup, I can tell. I'm actually practicing on how to deal with these people. The answer? Convince them my idea is their idea, like you would with a cat or a woman.

>>24629746
Honestly? I'm a deeply spiritual guy, and I believe a yearly class about ethics is important, even if it's framed through a particular lens. As a dude who worked for the ministry of education, private school is higher quality than public, and catholic school is technically a private school. Plus, it helps me avoid some... ideological friction with certain topics. And uniforms are dope, dont let anyone tell you otherwise, I loved that shit.

>>24629764
>Convince them my idea is their idea, like you would with a cat or a woman.
Have fun with your kid using the same gaslighting for putting you in a home

>>24629764
Well, all the best my friend. I only hope you will not unduly harass your son if he turns out to be a faggot! There are dignified ways to live that way too, simply direct him to Plato...

walkin' around my home singing "hit 'em with the 'tism" to myself

>>24629770
Me with
>YOU SEE YOU SHOULD TAKE ME SERIOUSLY
>VERY SERIOUSLY INDEED
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mimLpZCO5k8

>>24629769
Thanks, much appreciated. He can be gay, got no problem with that. You can be a stalwart upstanding gay man as much as a straight one. But he will not be a faggot. To love a man's anus and form? Yuck, but I cant disagree with his preference. To be groomed into a servile demiman who uses their sexuality as a crutch for their ennu? Not going to happen.

>>24629768
Wife works in one as a nurse. I'll go willingly, not because it's fun, but because it's required at some point, and I'm pragmatic enough to know the math, or I'll be crazy enough where it doesnt matter.

Bro I don't care if she is my cousin. She is sitting across from me and looks like she is from a Renaissance painting. Ive never felt like this before

Did you guys knew that in 1982, Reagan
Crazy, right?

I remember, a year ago, when these threads were still called something else, there was an Anon here who wrote about how his little sister had accidentally OD'd on edibles, and how mad he was at his parents for going on vacation right after. I wonder if he's still here, and if he's okay. I hope is.

>anon keeps tells us all the types of kids that would disappoint him
>anon also keeps telling us that he's going to force his kid to be what doesn't disappoint him
>keeps telling us constantly his merit badges mean that he'll be totally better than other parents including his own
I feel bad for the kid knowing how little self awareness or capacity to understand someone independent from them that immature parents have, I'm going to pretend this was a fictional addendum to What Maisie Knew

>>24629763
What?

>>24629783
It's because she's a close relative you've never met. People are attracted to their relatives and raising them through early childhood together is why they get sexually repulsed by each other
It's why a lot of people married their long lost sister, brother, father, cousin, etc and found out later through DNA or genealogy

>>24629800
That's the thing with these larps - to anyone outside the chuds on this board, posts like that are a lose/lose. It’s plainly a lie, for a start, but even if someone did entertain the notion it might be true, it still comes off as distasteful, a peculiar little breach of confidence, the sort of thing you really ought to keep to yourself rather than parading it in a place like this.

>>24629811
If it's a character, it's well crafted as what type it is

When I was gay, I drew gory scenes with death and destruction. Now I draw unicorns and meadows.

>>24629819
Pls supply unicorn pics

>>24629824
I sent all my drawings to my brother as a birthday gift.

>>24629819
>Not unicorns goring people/each other
Missed a trick there

>>24629814
boring, long-winded, inessential fool.

When did JFK commit suicide?

>>24629831
Sorry to hear about your hands going missing since :(

>>24629833
i just googled unicorn matador and no one's done it before
might be onto something there

>>24629837
Feb 1961

>>24629838
I'm not a good artist.

>>24629831
world's worst bday present

>>24629800
You seem to be taking it personally. Is that what happened in your life? Parenting is establishing a structure and giving your child room to grow while making their own mistskes. In /lit/ terms, you cant control when the river floods, but if you know it does, you'd be a fool not to prepare. Ethics, morality, honor, responsibility, and discipline can be taught to anyone if you start early enough. You dont have to beat it into them. You dont even need to be dogmatic about it, you just establish a clear relationship between correct values with positive association as well as a clear ontology to justify it. A kid is naturally going to push back, and when they do your obligation as a parent is to ensure that when they fall, they dont fall in traffic.

>>24629811
Not a larp, this is really how I'm going to raise my kid, and you dramatically misinterpeted what I said if that's how you understand things.

People born of rape should be put to death.

>>24629839
I think there's a market

>>24629831
word's best birthday present

>>24629848
I don't think you've read What Maisie Knew

>>24629795
NTA, but I spanked my little sister for spitting on me. She kept spitting on me, so I would smack her back. Then I eventually bent her over and spanked her. After that I left the room. We've had our issues.

>>24629870
Nope, not my schtick judging by the synopsis. Care to rundown things I should know?

>>24629885
>Hey let me talk to you about the character study I won't read
No

>>24629848
What gives you away is the tone.
If this were real, would that person package their hopes and insecurities as a manifesto on /lit/? Maybe drop a hint or two, but this is the kind of thing people do when they want the spotlight more than sincerity, isn't it?
Though maybe I’d rather believe someone's making this up than think there are men who act like this. The modern notion of the child-as-project is particularly rib-achingly awful to me.

>>24629855
did you draw that? it's nice

>>24629802
You said that exact thing about wanting to paint your life over her body a couple of months back when you were posting about being a married man in love with your coworker.

>>24629885
>respond to random anon talking about books from the kid's perspective
>talk about how anon has your parenting style all wrong because you took their idea of selfish parents who can't understand their kid's perspective personally
>though accuse anon of taking it personally when anon says they're taking it as fiction
>anon asks if you've even read the book written from the child's perspective
>not my schtick
>>24629903
It's either well written fiction or that just came natural and my money's on the latter because I don't think anon could write characters that well

>>24629853
how can you believe something so supremely cruel ?

>>24629932
>when anon says they're taking it as fiction
I take everything here as fiction, but it is a genre character he's writing, with recognisable tropes and manners. I also steal everything here as grist for the mill, and trust others do too.

>>24629900
Fair enough, I was happy to chat about themes and tropes I could relate it to.

>>24629903
Ah, yup. That makes sense. I am really having a kid. And I really believe these things. And I do view my child as a project. And I dont particularly care about sharing because I'm rigorous in the basis of my understanding. This is sincerity because I've lived a tough life and have a clear understanding of my role, I dont care about the spotlight at all since I'm anonymous, and I have no obligation to curate the tone of my earnest opinions for you. It's not a manifesto, I responded as people asked me particular questions, and I have a coherent framework for everything.

But what you fail to grasp is I worked for the ministry of education; specifically with children who have disabilities. I mentor troubled young people all the time, the kind who wind up in jail for selling drugs and stabbing someone. I put a great deal of effort into helping the. develop when no one else cares. My father is an obsessive driven overly emotional complex sort of guy with imposter syndrome who just missed the olympics and lived vicariously through me until I collapsed under the weight of expectations. My mother is a cold calculated precise woman who worked as an executive in a high pressure field and had a tough time with the situation. And you seem to think I'm doing the same thing my parents did to me; frankensteining a human into an ideological box. Couldnt be further from the truth.

The reality is, I believe in an adaptable humanistic philosophy. The outcomes I want will be nurtured, not forced, and I understand I have limited capacity. My obligation is to make sure my kid is capable of dealing with the harsh, arbitrary nature of reality, willing to get up when knocked down, and is willing to work hard to get what they want. Just because I insulted faggots and your sensibilities were offended has nothing to do with me or the reality at hand, and a cold honest truth is better than 10,000 mawkish lies.

>>24629947
>No no, I really can talk about the book I haven't read
I don't know why you think that's an attractive proposal, please explain.

>>24629956
I wasnt going to talk about the book, I havent read it; couldnt tell you about the plot or symbolism. But I can discuss a wide variety of applied philosophy relative to the situation, and if you were trying to tell me something specific, I reasonably could have grasped it. Attractive? Depends. Helpful? Perhaps.

>>24629947
& he still spins out into another long-winded, oversharing reply. Apparently without even thinking twice about whether it fits into the story he's selling.
A truly lived truth rarely needs so much framing or insistence that it’s not a 'performance.'

>But what you fail to grasp is I worked for the ministry of education; specifically with children who have disabilities
If someone were in a high-functioning role like this, wouldn’t they also be aware of how this reads? There’s no reason for anyone to take it seriously.

You can be rigorous and humanistic and still admit that sharing something so raw and structured on an anonymous imageboard is, at best, unusual and at worst, performative.

>>24629964
Sorry, how is helpful and to whom? I also don't see how you would
>discuss a wide variety of applied philosophy relative to the situation
when that seems to me to imply, well, what most philosophers would do, some actual inquiry into the subject matter. People who do philosophy tend to be the sort to want to have read the text, so this seems something of a non sequitur from my perspective.

>>24629965
It's radical honesty; I'm always honest. To a fault. Even when I shouldnt be, because you dont know anything about me other than what I've shared. And your dismissive reply discussing the epistemology and framing of my reply rather than the content says everything needed about how you're choosing to engage with the subject. From an ideological perspective you're upset by the content, and are trying sophistry to avoid things you dont like. That's your perogative and to be frank, reasonable ellocution is no substitute for an argument.

But fact of the matter, I worked in the Systems Planning Research and Innovation Department because of my technical expertise with data visualization and thematic coding of qualitative data. Dont any more, but I did. I volunteer twice a week with at risk youth because I was an at risk youth, even if my parents were honestly great, despite their flaws. And I'm going to raise my children the best I can given the circumstances provided, even if some petulant anon wants to pass snide moral judgements because she disagrees with the philosophy, but lacks the capacity for specific argumentation without getting a big hurt feeling.

>>24629965
>If someone were in a high-functioning role like this, wouldn’t they also be aware of how this reads?
Kek no, it generally just means they're capable of surviving bureaucratic politics

>>24629981
Eh, fair enough. You were talking shit and I wanted to get the reference, which may have resulted in me wanting to read the book to also understand the content, but you're right. If I dont want to read it I probably wont, and if I want the reference I can read the book; it's not complicated. Sorry, got hot to trot.

>>24630003
You’ve shared plenty about yourself, yet you seem to miss how your style and platform undermine the seriousness of your claims.

>Systems Planning Research and Innovation Department because of my technical expertise with data visualization and thematic coding of qualitative data
wording feels a bit jargon-heavy, like someone trying to sound impressive rather than clearly explain their role. The rule on this site - especially in a conversation like this- is: if you can’t prove it, I can't believe it. So why bring it up at all? If it were true, it’d show in your words without you having to state it outright. The fact you feel the need to drop it reads like a sign it doesn’t - and for all intents and purposes, it feels like a lie.
Real understanding shows itself in what you communicate, not just in dumping raw feelings or unverifiable credentials.

This isn’t about hurt feelings or avoiding argument - at the end of the day, you can frame it however you want, but the platform and tone you chose say more than your words do.

>>24630007
believe me I have no illusions about the DfE, but they’d be able to deploy a better lie.

>>24630046
Collectively, yes, individually, and without a secretary, no

>>24630077
Just as a general rule, real insiders talk with casual specificity, not resume-jargon.

>>24630036
Prove what? Anything substantive requires me doxing myself, anything annecdotal can be denied with little rigor, and I dont particularly care if you believe it because you've said little of merit in the first place. You're just sticking your head in a cartesian rabbit hole because you'd rather lecture me on semantics then engage with the content. The jargon is extremely specific for exactly one type of job. You want to hear something else specific? My region was one of the top performing in PISA despite a downward trend, and a worsening downward trend after I left, but only the public sector was assessed. Every single person in the ministry had their kids in private school. I can also tell you that among the nongraduating cohort within 4 years, 53.8% had disabilities (n= 29289) and if you have less then 13 credits by the end of grade 10 you habe an 85% chance not to graduate within 4 years, but at 16 credits it goes down to 11%.

>>24630094
He's talking to an outsider though. You have to consider the kind of people who smell their farts like that a dinner party, and that is DfE coded

>>24629855
not sure what lines to color between

>>24630123
I thought I made it pretty clear I'm not asking for proof - I'm asking why feel the need to mention it when you can't prove it. Using 'specific' terms isn’t the same as actually inhabiting the role or culture you claim. I said here >>24630094, it reads like self-conscious performance rather than straightforward truth. This reads like someone trying to sound like they’ve done it, not someone who actually has. Agencies use technical language - but the kind that comes from habit, not from trying to impress. This sounds like how an outsider thinks insiders talk.

>I dont particularly care if you believe it
clearly, when all my replies have been at-arms-length putdowns and you're pulling stats you know I won’t fact-check and getting defensive in the replies.

You claim this level of professional insight, but you’re choosing to air it here, in this tone, on this platform. That doesn’t square with someone who actually knows the value of credibility.

>/lit/ still values deep reading
>/lit/ still demands you read the book
>/lit/ still critiques your diary desu for tone and style
ily autists sometimes

>>24630179
That sure is a bunch of stuff you made up to feel better about your opinion. I referenced my specific role in the very specific department. I referenced specific statistics from a specific report with specific values and included the N; a report which isnt publically available. I can even tell you the granularity of disability or the breakdown by gender if you'd like. And here you are, lecturing me about what is and isnt my domain, because I sound like a prick and brought it up on /lit/, when at the end of the day this is the lynchpin for your worldview.

Data Visualization and themed qualitative coding isnt jargon, it says something very specific for a very specific job. The jumbled mess of a department name? It's because they thought the acronym SPRID was clever. I can tell you the minster changed while I worked there outside of an election cycle, that I was the only person without a phd in my department, that they use access linked pivot tables for the analysis because the data sets are so big they'll crash excel, and the building itself has thousands of people walking by it every day because it's right on the main strip of a big city, across from another government building disgusied as condos. It has a scan-in keycard at the elevator, a revolving entry door that caused me to spill a full coffee on my shirt, IT in the back right corner of the nondescript main floor, and a cafeteria in the bottom with its own parking structure run by Aramark that will fry you fresh eggs in a sando at a reasonable price. The nearest coffee place is second cup.

It doesnt matter what I say, and I have passed the burden of proof deemed reasonable.

>>24630236
Anon you're ignoring anon think the options are
>He's lying about being this socially and morally incompetent and this is just a bit
or
>He is that awful
Proving it's not a bit is probably not where you should put your focus

>>24630252
Nah, if you larp, you should larp hard

>>24630252
I dont really care about being awful. In fact, I may be awful in her opinion and I'm fine with it. Doesnt bother me at all. The only reason I care about the credential is because anon is looking to discredit me and pass a moral judgement without discussing it, that mostly revolves around a post about me saying mean things about faggots, my tone, and the fact that I am an ass in general. All of that's fine, skip the semantic lecture.

>>24630236
The real lynchpin (which I think you still haven't full grasped), is what's all this aiming at? Why you feel the need to unload all this detail like defensive overkill. Oversharing this much rarely signals confidence.
If I were to talk about being an undergrad would I feel the need to spill the full building layout and cafeteria menu to validate my expertise (in a space where no one asked for it).
It’s not about what you say, but why you say it here, in this way, that reveals a lot more than you realise.

>>24630236
>Data Visualization and themed qualitative coding isnt jargon
You make charts and pivot tables. How is the above not jargon?

>>24630252
lol replies constructed with the highest administrative attention to the wrong details.
shines an interesting light on their views on parenting

>>24630275
Telling you DfE coded, going to be as mystified by kids as the rest of them

>>24630288
Nah the kids will be fine, but anon might find himself justifying his bullshit job at dinner parties for as long as the pension allows

>>24630270
Mhmmm, that's nice. If you said you were in your undergrad and I was skeptical, I'd assess your domain knowledge, or I'd ask specifics. I gave you increasing layers of specificity. I asked you to ask for additional information. Then I dumped a paragraph of extremely granular information that describes exactly one real place in the world, but is a hair removed from doxing me, because I was being pedantic I dont care about framing something in a convincing matter because I'm not trying to lie.

>>24630272
Fine, data visualization is jargon. I can buy that. But thematic qualitative coding doesnt really have a short form. Data labeler, maybe? I make the lables and structure them into a narrative, so I'm not just sticking a word on a thing. It's not quant because it's about words. Semantic Autist grasps it a bit better. Maybe Feedback Jockey?

>>24630291
Oh THAT job is way less bullshit than my last one, which was half social engineering, half data analysis and full of CRE bullshit. My current one is pretty reasonable and susinct.

>>24630301
You know the advantage of this website is if you shut up about this and start posting about anime girls, you can walk away from mistakes with no trace instead of keeping digging

>>24630301
Granular info =/= credibility if it’s tossed out like scattershot ammo.
Again, I never asked for proof - just pointing out that if your role and knowledge were solid & meaningful, it would come through naturally and clearly without bombarding a thread with minutiae. Reads like someone overcompensating, drowning a conversation in irrelevant details because the core of it can’t stand on its own.

>>24630309
Okay maybe it might be as long as people keep inviting him and the pension will last longer than the dinner invites

>>24630310
Aint no mistake here. Well, other than replying in earnest to a smugposter.

>>24630309
>susinct
dept. for education everyone

>>24630317
Whatever you say anon

>>24630311
Again, this is to justify avoiding the initial subject matter by playing tone police. Which is fine, but not applicable to my writing or the discussion.

>>24630330
It’s about the fundamental logic of communication.
If your point had any ballast, you wouldn’t need this frantic oversharing.

>>24630330
Idk why you thought a data visualization job was relevant to being a good parent, it's really unlikely that's any part of a key to good parenting, and you're the one who brought that up like it was relevant. Anon critiquing jargon is at least on topic for the board

>>24630341
I got one for you:
Autistic beams light up the night;
Anon' reposed inside her lair.
But semantic reams of tone delight
those who think just with their deriere.
The musty stank of farts compound
the gaseous hole in which she dwells.
She ponders sulphur's sound abound,
thank god she's lost her sense of smell.
The final knell tolls like the rain;
the argument has serpentined.
It's final form? Shame's migraine;
now it's time to just recline.
But rest comes not as her soiled gown
is crammed betwixt her soiled cheeks;
pasted to them like a frown,
and a fitting end for what she seeks.


>>24630346
Thats... a reasonable point. My bad. Autism battles and what not. Maybe I'll discuss it some other time. Probably not.

>>24630413
Bold choice.

you are the dead

>>24630466
Death is impossible; I cannot become nothing because already I am

>>24630571
is that a challenge?

>>24630738
>>24630738
>>24630738

>>24629580
I don't want to dream, I want a vampire qt of my own. Come on, I promise that I won't break the Masquerade.