ITT - /mu/ in 1983

Just did some coke with Duran Duran lol

Impeach Ronnie Raygun before he starts World War III! The clock ticks closer to midnight each passing day!

War [Island, 1983]
The deadly European virus that's always tainted this band turns out to be their characteristic melodic device, a medieval-sounding unresolved fifth frequently utilized by monks in Hollywood movies. In other respects, however, their hot album is rock and roll indeed. The Edge becomes a tuneful guitarist by the simple expedient of not soloing, and if Bono has too many Gregorian moments his conviction still carries the music. Anyway, I'll take his militant if pacifist Christianity ("The real battle has begun/To claim the victory Jesus won") over most of the secular humanism and Jah love rockers are going in for these days. B+

Sheena Easton is hot.

His art album having gone platinum and failed to clear bottom line, Joel comes at his poor neglected generation direct, peddling a nostalgia no one will mistake for philosophy. And although he's still a wordy bastard who can't leave a simple piece of music alone, the pre-Beatle "concept"--unmistakable references to the Four Seasons and Otis Redding (as if Otis entered Billy's world before the Beatles, but never mind) marking a selfconsciously simplified musical orientation--does rein in his showbiz ornateness. A good half of these songs have the timeless melodic appeal of the greatest pop (the greatest pre-rock pop, but never mind)--the chorus he stole from "L. v. Beethoven" is by no means the most pleasing thing here. And though his Stax horns are way too ornate, that doesn't mean they're no fun. B+

BEAT IT, JUST BEAT IT...

>YOU'LL TAKE MY LIFE BUT I'LL TAKE YOURS TOO

As his head continues to expand, tricks that once seemed honorably functional begin to smack of expediency, with upwardly mobile cameos throwing his shortcomings into heavy relief. Teena Marie and the latter-day Tempts he could keep up with, but on this album Smokey Robinson shows up Rick's rank sentimentality, Billy Dee Williams his cornball cool, and Grandmaster Flash his roots of clay. And the redeeming social value of "P.I.M.P. the S.I.M.P." trips over his fashion sense--this is not a man who should criticize his peers for dressing funny. B-

>>126919732
Kill "Uptown Girl" with fire.

Fuckin' right new heavy metal is different from old heavy metal. The new stuff is about five silly beats faster. And the "new" metal singers all sound free, white, and roughly twenty one. C

SACK MAGGIE THE MILK SNATCHER

In which schlocky Michael Omartian replaces magic man Quincy Jones and Summer is born again. You know why? Because Omartian believes in Jesus, that's why. The result is the best Christian rock this side of T-Bone Burnett, and not just because it's suitable for Danceteria, although that helps. After all, can T-Bone claim to have introduced the concept of agape to the secular audience? B+

>>126919719
alas back when they were still pure

With music as subtle as Nelson's you wonder whether you're imagining things. Maybe we've just had it with his shtick--maybe a Martian couldn't tell the difference between this and Stardust. Then again, what do Martians know? Not only is Nelson choosing cornier material--self-serving schlock like the title song, awkward fripperies like "A Dreamer's Holiday"--but the relaxed, let's-wing-it delicacy has simply disappeared. When he tries at all, he usually oversings, and he's finally hitting the wrong clinkers. If you don't believe me, compare this "Autumn Leaves" to Stardust's timeless "September Song." Or ask yourself whether Julio Iglesias doesn't sound right at home on "As Time Goes By." C+

>>126919665 (OP)
Man what's this No Trend band doing here...they play too slow and singer sounds like a horse's ass. I thought Ian Mackaye banned these guys from the 930 Club? I want to rat them out to the cops but I hate cops urrrrgh! Straight edge 4 life! I guess one beer won't hurt...no mom im not trying to be like Nancy Reagan! Fuck that bitch!

This album displays all the wonted care Dylan has put into it, "License to Kill" being the only dud, musically speaking. Lyrically his disdain for the daughters of Satan has reached new peaks of exquisite detail--displaying neither hatred nor pity nor contempt, he approaches women with a solicitousness that's almost chilling, as if he knows what a self-serving scumbag he's being, if only subliminally. Nevertheless, this man has turned into a hateful crackpot between equating Jews with Zionism with the Likud, the muddled disquisition on international labor, and the ital al-Hassidim that inspires no less than three (!) superstitious attacks on space exploration. God only knows (and I use that phrase advisedly here) just how far he'll go if John Glenn becomes president. C

>>126919941
This crap will never get big. Arena rock forever!

i have 5,000 shares worth of Atari stocks I'm gonna be a millionaire in 2 years with the way video game sales are going lately

>>126919950
steve perrys neck is unusually long

Those of you who were truly hoping the jig was up this time can take comfort--this top ten album could be outselling Thriller or Flashdance or Pyromania. My suggestion is for Steve Perry to run as a moderate Republican from, say, Nebraska where his oratory would be well-received, and then, having shed his video-game interests, proceed to ram the tape tax through. D+

>>126920002
Steve's voice was starting to give out by this point. They way way fucking overtoured back then and it was catching up them.

Arena-rockers who never forgot heavy metal was once white blues, they took a long vacation and resurfaced as a fine white blues band starring a guitarist who always sounds like himself. Now, with hitest b.p.m.s speeding the groove, they've motorvated back toward metal again--boogie in overdrive, a funny car that's half platinum and half plutonium. The videos make you smile, the record runs you over. That's the pleasure of it. B+

>>126920045
shitty AutoZone sound system music best played when you're shopping for engine air filters

Charley Pride couldn't get away with the lucky songs Billy Sherrill's stuck George with this time, and though the unlucky songs are better, superstar guilt and second-convolution cheating just don't suit him. Granted, "Ol' George Stopped Drinkin' Today" is a near-perfect fit. But when it comes to "Almost Persuaded," I'll take the original--by David Houston, Tammy's first singing partner. C+

>>126920133
only Brazilians care about post-70s KISS

>>126920239
Pete pardo and Martin Popoff care

Back around 1970, I played for Nick Koszlas, a CalArts colleague of distinctly Yurrupean music tastes, a couple of singles I thought instructive--"Brown Eyed Girl", "California Dreaming", "Neanderthal Man", that sort of thing. The one he flipped for was "I Wanna Be Your Dog." So if you think the sonic cover proves they're a rocker at heart, you have a real fine art critic on your side. The dull rock critic would like to mention that the cover doesn't rock too good, either. But then again, neither did King Crimson a lot of the time. C-

In theory I've always been ok with synthpop duos, especially when the result is pop as stark and hooky as what David Stewart provides here. You might even say Annie Lennox has a bono vox. But these people are fools and pretentious fools at that. Just remember: When they say everybody's out to use or get used, be sure to go along for the ride you paid for. C

It should come as no surprise that this platinum product is utter dogshit even by heavy metal standards--under the suggestion of editors unable to distinguish Wynton Marsalis from Iron Maiden, my beleaguered colleagues at the dailies have been saying so all year and every insult goes into the press kit. Still, I must point out Mick Mars's dork-fingered guitar before getting to the one truly remarkable thing about this record--a track called "Ten Seconds To Love" in which singer Vince Neil appears to boast (!) about how fast he can ejaculate (or as the lyric sheet puts it, "cum"). Therein I believe lies the secret to their success--if you don't got it, flaunt it. Followup--"Pinkie Prick." D+

I've finally figured out what people mean when they call Paulie pop--they mean he's not rock. But to me pop implies a strict sense of received form whether crafted by the dB's or Billy Joel. McCartney's in his own world entirely, which is the charm of his music. And of course, a reliance on charm has always been his weakness. This is quite pleasant except when Britain's number-one earner preaches against violence as if self-interest wasn't an issue, which is also the only time it comes into firm contact with the great outside. B-

>>126919950
Steve is Portuguese that's why he loves florid Latin bvll cursive singing.

I wasn't sold on the last Van Halen album mostly a lot of hokey covers.

In some pop convolution, the effectlessness with which these London lasses appropriate various attractive girlgroup epiphenomena may simply signify that they're not an "authentic" girl group. And right, the Dixie Cups (even the Marvelettes) (maybe even the Crystals) had no discernible identity either. But they could sing. B-

ULTIMATE 1983 deep dive
310 songs
every good genre
1 song per artist
over 20 hours
ultra obscure and/or forgotten songs included
artists with under 500 monthly listeners or less included
pazz and jop winners included

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/1rFp60HB2cECJBFpM3N8xU?si=bb4db5e25d694c8e

>>126920708
Thanks, I'll check it out.

>>126920708
WHOA

>>126920616
These chicks sound like the type who only had missionary sex with the lights off and just laid there like a plank and made the guy do all the work. They're that dull.

They aren't a pop band or even an art-pop band--they're an art band, nothing less or more, and a damn smart one. If they weren't so smart they wouldn't be so emotional; in fact, if they weren't so smart no one would mistake them for a pop band. By obscuring their lyrics so artfully they insist that their ("pop") music is good for meaning as well as pleasure, but I guarantee that when they start enunciating--an almost inevitable move if they stick around--the lyrics will still be obscure. That's because their meaning and their emotion almost certainly describe the waking dream that captivates so many art and pop bands. Which leaves me wondering just how much their pleasure means. Quite a lot, I think. A-

What the fuck do people see in this pile of bloated, murky shit? Granted, Mick Jagger does still manage to slip into the vernacular specifity that other rock frontmen strive for and despite the wind-tunnel produciton Keith Richards remains the incorrigible genius-by-accident he is. Also guess what? Two songs contain political content, which I assume is supposed to fill me with gratitude. But guess what else? I'm such a churl that I'm only a sucker for good songs and these are as tiresome and witless and nasty as the rest. Their worst album. C

>>126920708
>notta one metal track when this was the peak era of metal
Apply yourself, anon.

>>126920616
Boy Trouble is the best song on here by a long distance.

Videos have been the making of this born poser's career and the unmaking of his music. Not that they've changed how hard and hooky it is, much less turned off the unwitting many who find sexism sexy. But if you've got no taste for the sound of the sneer, the visuals definitely aren't fantasy enough. C

>>126921573
that guy can't sing for shit

In case you bought the con, disco never died--just reverted to the crazies who thought it was worth living for. This shamelessly ersatz blonde is one of them, and with the craftily orchestrated help of a fine selection of producers, remixers, and DJs, she's come up with a shamelessly ersatz sound that's tighter than her tummy--essence of electro, the D in DOR. At first I thought the electroporn twelve-inch that pairs "Burning Up" with "Physical Attraction" was the way to go, but that was before she'd parlayed the don't-let-me-down vagueness of "Borderline" into a video about interracial love (sex, I mean) and a sneaky pop hook simultaneously. At one stiff per four-song side, smarter than Elvis Costello. A-

>>126919665 (OP)
https://youtube.com/shorts/ILWSp0m9G2U
https://youtube.com/shorts/nqAvFx3NxUM
https://youtube.com/shorts/Zi_XLOBDo_Y
https://youtube.com/shorts/3E-Zrg9CB_Q

>>126921573
interesting fusion of Bowie and Jim Morrison's vocals

>>126921535
that song must have perfectly described Cuckgau's attempts to get a date in high school

Peace and socialism, not bombs! Down with Reagan's and NATO's warmongering! Keep MX missiles out of Europe!

>>126920708
Noice

It's said that Miles has soloed better recently, and that the music relies on blues clichés. But like Agharta, this is the band's record, although unlike Agharta it works because Miles reins the band in--Mike Stern's blues duties keep him unfused, John Scofield gains needed muscle, Bill Evans hardly opens his embouchure. Anyway, blues is supposed to be a music of reinvented clichés. And Miles sounds fairly fine. A-

>>126919930
i love washed alcoholic midlife crisis Dylan

Anyone who wants Dave's $17 million fling to flop doesn't understand how little good motives have to do with good rock and roll. Rodgers & Bowie are a rich combo in the ways that count as well as the ways that don't, and this stays up throughout, though it's perfunctory professional surface does make one wonder whether Bowie-the-thespian really cares much about pop music these days. "Modern Love" is the only interesting new song, the remakes are pleasantly pointless, and rarely has such a lithe rhythm player been harnessed to such a flat groove. Which don't mean the world won't dance to it. B

NOW LISTEN UP
SHE'S RAZOR SHARP

Fuck Billy Joel, man.

Maiden always makes great background noise but wouldn't call them a song band.

As a guy who likes his funk obvious, I think those who esteem "Rockit" as highly as Head Hunters are too kind to Head Hunters. Small thanks to Herbie, lots to Material and Grand Mixer D.St., it's the best novelty instrumental in years and the best pop of Hancock's life. Elsewhere various bright ideas, such as Pete Cosey, are obscured by the usual aura of set-piece dink--jumpy enough and often fun, but fusoid nevertheless. B+

>>126922311
>>126921976
>>126921956
>>126921938
/jazz/ general here?

>>126919665 (OP)
lol

>>126922345
mitebcool

>>126922394
think i'll pass on that album tbqh

>>126922428
why, I like me some Stephane Grappelli

Go Orioles!

UPTOWN GIRL, SHE'S BEEN LIVIN' IN HER...

There are some hiccups, but this is a bold new step for the band, and I can't wait to see where they go from here? Could be a Beatles-esque run through the rest of the decade, I'm willing to bet.

If Ronnie and Nancy are the only everybodies rockin' by name on the less than rousing title finale, then maybe what Neil means to say is that basic rockabilly isn't worth too much all by its lonesome. I agree, but expect the argument would be more convincing if Neil plus Ben Keith could match Brian Setzer chop for chop. The covers are redundant or worse, as are all but two of the originals. I hope Robert Gordon or somebody rescues "Kinda Fonda Wanda." And I hope Neil realizes that for all the horrible truth of "Payola Blues," nobody's three thou's gonna get this on top forty. Run time: 24:55. List price: $8.95. C+

>>126923138
trolled Geffen good here

The best thing to come out of punk rock, nothing will ever top it!

this heavy metal shit has to be satanic

>>126923436
Fuck off, Tipper.

>>126923382
Gee, I sure hope they don't start completely sucking immediately after this by watering down their sound and potency with increasingly dumber mid-paced thrash riffing and choruses

>faggots dropping like flies from AIDS
Glorious timeline.

I don't care what people say.
This is a good album, but they gotta get rid of Brian Robertson.
I just saw Motorhead, and they didn't play any of the old stuff.
Plus Brian looks so out of place with his faggy look.
Bring back Fast Eddie, and play the old classics.
Eddie could learn all the songs off of Another Perfect Day, and probably play them even better than Brian.

I had filed this as unlistenable until the amazing tuneout power of "Roll Me Away" piqued me into determining why. The songs aren't half bad--adequate melodically and with moments of good writing. But Seger's romantic individualism is a little simpleminded, more late-outlaw than Bruce, and it's suffocated by overstatement. Almost any country singer could show him how to approach a cliché kinda easy like. In fact, with his connections Seger could probably get lessons from Willie himself. But with his taste he'd probably choose Waylon instead. C+

With Eno departed, the polyrhythms no longer seem so portentous--this funk is quirkily comfortable, like the Byrne-produced B-52's or the three-piece of Byrne's earlier primitivist period. Unfortunately, the polyrhythms no longer seem so meaningful, either. Though God knows there's no rock and roll rule that says playfulness can't signify all by itself, the disjoint opacity of the lyrics fails to conceal Byrne's confusion about what it all means. Yet side two lights me up nevertheless, sandwiching the purest anticapitalist song he's ever written and the purest prolove song he's ever written around two pieces of typically ironic-optimistic futurism. A-

>>126926418
>I had filed this as unlistenable until the amazing tuneout power of "Roll Me Away"
Actually I agree about the unlistenable part there.

>>126919862
I could do without the synth horns though.

Initially, this blue angel won my heart by covering the two most profound pop songs of the past five years, "Money Changes Everything" and "When You Were Mine." Now, with "Girls Just Want to Have Fun" the official pep song of the daughters of Ms. and Pepsi-Cola and "Time After Time" throbbing hearts by the millions, I've softened my strictures about her Betty Boop bimboism--if a kook who's loved, respected, and taken seriously by her sisters fools boys into believing she can be fooled with, more power to her. First side's an eternal classic. Second sneaks by on the one where she kisses me and the one where she diddles herself. A

>>126919665 (OP) https://youtube.com/shorts/dJSaQVX5mwI

>>126922811
It’s a great album, but I hate how sidelined Copeland is on this. If the song of the summer is any indication, Sting is realizing that he can replace any drummer with a machine and still be great. I hope they can find a way to make it work, they’re even kicking MJ’s ass right now. One more album of similar quality and they absolutely are worthy of the “Beatles of the 80’s” moniker.

>>126926775
>Blue Angel
Nice reference

>>126930972
Roy Orbison, damn I get it.

IT WAS A SATURDAY NIGHT WHEN HEAVY ROCK WAS BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRNNNN

Although my tastes in porn don't run to designer whips, Terri Nunn's sex-object impersonation on the cunningly entitled "Sex (I'm a . . .)" generates a mild buzz. But that's the only good part--the rest is flimsy synth-pop sans even a flash of pink, unless songs about the Metro make you wet your pants. C+

The man whose head expanded

>>126919665 (OP)
post-punk is dead
long live glam metal