Thread 509912245

Here is the most retarded bird in existence. The turkish dove

>>509912245 (OP)
I thought they were called laughing doves.

>>509912489
We call them turkish on here.


They are the most retarded birds on the planet

>>509912245 (OP)
would rather have doves then jeets

>>509912917
Yeah they are. Goofy, stupid and cute.
They use my window as a love hotel, they shit everywhere, but they eat all the spiders and insects, so, its okay.

>>509912245 (OP)
I feed a couple of these birbs regularly, they are comfortable with me and land on my balcony. I also saved a pigeon once. Birds are cool.

>>509913175
This is how it looks like after multiple couples.

>>509912917
No we don't urbanite sodomite

>>509912917
we used to call sexual diseases the "french diseases". don't you and the bongs do shit like that too?

>>509912245 (OP)
Don't insult birds

>>509913241
birds are retarded

>>509912917
wow fuck you. i just got a pet dove

>>509912245 (OP)
They can't possibly be stupider than an ordinary chicken.

>>509914538
Corvids seem more intelligent than typical NPCs.

>>509912245 (OP)
Wood pigeons and doves are pretty retarded, but have you ever held one, they're incredibly soft, I can't put into words how nice they feel to touch

>>509912245 (OP)
No one cares about your bird Mohammad.

>>509914548
my dovey bud

SCHLOPPEN SCHLAPPEN

>>509914902
Cute little fucker. This one is my room mate, we like to drink and watch games together but this little fucker drinks everything and gets way too drunk. I might have to kick him out.

>>509914538
no they are not
Ravens and crows are super smart

>>509915151
kek mine tried to take sips of my drinks. they must like alcohol

>>509915151
sdoN NOT calla nimals "fuckr"
tjha animals teelapthaic
undrstand feelings
undstand intentIOINS
MORE SENSITIEV
THANU THINKG

>>509914869
>fucks birds
I remember hearing about you in the news, you sick faggot

>>509912245 (OP)
They look more based than you op

>>509912245 (OP)
Why do you want these birds to be smarter than they are? What function are they not achieving due to their intellectual limitations? Appreciate them for what they are, trou de cul.

>>509915434
Don't tell me what to tell other creatures that are lower than me you little fucker.

>>509915402
All jokes aside, i love birds.. i have both wood and turkish doves and having them chirping outside my window all the time doing their little bows to eachother and collecting sticks.. i enjoy watching their little simple lives.

>>509915908
that’s sick you have wild laughing doves. all i have outside are 1 million house sparrows that can empty my 5lb bird feeder in a single day. lucky

>>509912245 (OP)
Not even close. This retard will literally walk in front of your car.

>>509915604
t. fellow winner of Earth chad

>>509916399
>tfw Walmart sells 40 lb bags of good quality bird seed for under $20 shipped to your door
Lmfao I don't even bother with a bird feeder

>>509916835
i get 35 lb bags for 14 dollars at tractor supply. wish i could find even cheaper so i could single-handedly destroy my state with house sparrows

>>509915402
Stop biting your nails retard

>>509916930
Cockatoos are agents of chaos.

doves are all retarded
the ones near me are a real downer tho

>>509916399
Some pigeons and doves are really rare and can do acrobatics.. i'm guessing most of them are kept in captivity as they are highly priced. Mike Tyson even has a shit ton of rare doves that would prolly net you in the millions depending on breed.

>>509916390
This might be a euphemism for the state of mankind compared to the animal kingdom.. did we ask for too much, did we get to greedy.

>>509919566
This kind of graffiti I can live with.

Norwegian city seagulls are the ziggers of the bird world.
>cannibalistic
>rather steal food than dive after fish every time
>would poke lifelong friends' eye out if he stole a crumb
>"SHRAAAAWK SHREEWK HWAHWAHWA"
>pretends to be grateful amd friendly for the shrimp you gave it, will steal your sandwich the moment you trust it enough to get close

The outer island seagulls are nice, though.

>>509912245 (OP)
I thought that award went to seagulls?

>>509918397
based

>>509913047
He's a chonky boi

>>509912245 (OP)
they're cool

>>509913355
vacuum that shit nigga

>>509912245 (OP)
dunno, I've seen more retarded birds

>>509920969
That is one epic seagull.
Once saw a crow with a bigass sandwhich crash land along with his prizeafter seizing it from a nearby farm presumably.

Little guy was willing to fight me, a two metre tall dude, to defend that sandwich, so i got to observe him eating it while occasionally feinting at me.

I give that to turkeys. Those things are fucking retarded.

>>509921529
Ever seen that ostrich rip its own head off inbetween a railing.. i'd give it to the ostrich.

>>509921664
Oh i remember that, but i don't know if a single instance can define a species.

>>509921705
True, but it was still retarded.

>>509921664
Yeah, that was pretty brutal. Still, these fuckers are everywhere in parts of America and just go full retard.

>>509921893
Absolutely, but hey we have muslims and Ukrainians with their complex suicide rituals.

>>509921705
not a single instance, ostriches instinctively stick their heads into any narrow space looking for burrowing rodents to eat, and their only reaction to finding something dangerous instead is to yank their heads back out with little to no regard for whether their heads will actually remain attached or not
it works when it's a hole in the ground, not so much when it's a hole in a solid wall

Magpies one of the few birds to pass the mirror test

>>509922167
>What a handsome bird you are!
>FOR ME TO POOP ON

>>509922310
He's shitting himself realizing what his life is

>>509922069
basically they evolved to fill a specific flightless bird niche, and they aren't going to unevolve it unless they're forced to live in an environment where their evolutionary adaptions get them killed instead of getting them food for at least a few thousand years

I hate all kinds of doves and pidgeons
I love all kinds of corvids

That's all.

>>509920969
kek.
cgi, but still kek

>>509922310
I'd shit myself too if I head a beak like his.

>>509922632
someone had a video of this frustrated bird but added a segment where the bird flies away for several seconds, then a brick suddenly crashes through the windshield seemingly dropped from a few hundred feet up
anyone have it? seems to have disappeared from my archive

>>509921464
if the hawk went for it then they would have made the most OP bird species possible. what a retard

>>509922573
Ah yes the ostrich. How quaint. Their retardation, however, pales in contrast to the emu, having the lowest brain-to-body ratio. Their stupidity is only matched by their horrible, vile appearance and aggressive nature.

>>509914538
>be pigeon
>evolve to live on the side of rocky cliffs where you can just shit out an egg into a rocky crevice with literally zero chance of rolling out
>"duhhhh this bird retarded where is le bowl of sticks"

>>509923092
yes, we know it's personal for you, Bruce
still the most dangerous bird on the planet is the cassowary

Thank goodness I'm a crow.

Ain't none of us made dumbasses iof ourselves like this.

>>509923092
You lost a war to those retarded fuckers, that says more about your country than it does about the retarded avian.

>>509912245 (OP)
Sweet I don't even have to go to /an/ today. Pic related are my buddies for over 11 years.

>>509923439
Fucking knew it would be sideways. They're in my local woods. They come when I call them

>>509912245 (OP)
All doves are, flying parasitic aids rats. Couple months ago i left my balcony door opened and when i came back a pigeon had got inside, shat all over my carpet and left.

>>509923308
Imagine the brown queue you see lining up at your nearest social services center, rage contorting their surly faces, as they demand their gibbs. Now multiply it by 10,000 and congregate them all in the same area as they spot you and your comrade in arms, as they hoot and holler, working themselves into a tiff as they charge at you screeching their vile language. That is what we faced.

>>509923439
I've never seen an owl before.. pretty rare in Denmark to see. I've seen falcons and kestrels but never owl.

>>509915402
I will buy hard cider and wine for my parrots. They do love it and I saw birds in the wild getting drunk on fermented berries so it's pretty normal for them.

>>509923932
be careful, wine is to fermented berries what Everclear is to Bud Lite, it's way too easy for birds to drink themselves to death on the hard stuff especially considering their extra-low body mass

>>509914460
>we used to call sexual diseases the "french diseases"
same here in Polish
the old slang word for syphilis is 'franca'

>>509923783
Emu's and Abo's choose your ally and choose your enemy.
I remember the aussie that ran over a group of emus, he must've gotten the Victoria Cross for Australia for that emu massacre.

https://www.adelaidenow.com.au/news/law-order/man-charged-for-animal-cruelty-after-viral-video-showed-him-running-over-emus/news-story/06a70666261931dd6c189376529deb0c

>>509923913
you just know

>>509912245 (OP)
doves are great

>>509912245 (OP)
Those arent racoons.

>>509924352
You'd think so, but we have been living under occupation since then

>>509924529
True, the real enemy is the (((people))) in power in our governments.

>>509923913
That's pretty goddam cute

>>509912245 (OP)
I took the head off a dove that was just staring at me as i was driving down the road, i even slowed down to give it time to fly away. It just stared at me until i heard it thunk under the car

>>509924748
I love animals so much bros. I wish I were disciplined enough to give up meat.

>>509912245 (OP)
They may be dumb, but doves are based as fuck.

>>509924529
Case in point.

>>509924961
It sure wouldn't be the same without them to entertain us.

>>509912245 (OP)
What do they do that is so fucking retarded?

>>509924961
scold people when they waste food, especially meat.
something died for that, the very least you can do is consume it all.