Thread 82820479

Thread for discussions about selfharm and mutual support

eh it's thursday already?

Hello
>How are you doing today?
>Any plans for today?
>When was the last time you hurt yourself?
>Why did you hurt yourself?
>Is there anything bothering you right now?

hii
Here's a bunch of helpful links

> long list of self harm alternatives (thank you muddy):
https://imgur.io/a/7Q2zgw7

>a first aid post cuting:
https://www.lifesigns.org.uk/first-aid-for-self-injury-and-self-harm/

> wound care guide:
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1CsvJs8qNCVkHWHKekMSmCn6qn0GBEcgnq9fIqlA6Uv0/mobilebasic

> bpd workbook:
https://d-pdf.com/book/1781/read

>a bpd Information Book (anon said it's exceptionally good)
https://annas-archive.org/md5/1a4f329474320214a120a4d553c6b60c

> bdbt (dialectical behavioral therapy)
workbook is intended for BPD but can work for anyone:
https://cursosdepsicologia.com.ar/wp-content/uploads/2021/05/THEDIA1.pdf

Please don't post any drastic images and if you have to, spoiler them

saw this cute bird on Tuesday

>>82820479 (OP)
hey cat
>eh it's thursday already?
really doesn't feel like it yeah

is there any market for cutting for money?

>>82821252
hey ali
how's it going?
yep I woke up and it's today today apparently

>>82821313
probably if you're a girl, then there's a market for anything
but I don't think I'd reccomend doing that

>>82821313
probably sadly

>>82821884
>how's it going?
okay so far. how about you?
>woke up and it's today today apparently
always a weird feeling when that happens

>>82815907
>That shows one of the best indie cartoons rn.
agreed. maybe even cartoons in general. the characters and designs are nice, it has cool action and is legit funny. not sure how well it works for not-40k-fans, but as a fan i'm having a good time.

>Did they know that would happen or do they look on in horror?
i suppose they knew, since it was part of the episode and they are probably related with the creators somehow. i don't think they have the budget for actual actors. ^^

> I think I should just go to bed soon.
did you sleep well?

>how silly of me.
happens. it sounds more correct than the correct word anyway.

>>82815933
>it's really easy to empty too
true, but at least i feel better after visiting the thread and talking to you guys.

>>82820479 (OP)
>eh it's thursday already?
glad that it is. even better. i don't have work tomorrow.

>Hello
hi catbro! how's your day?

>>82821252
hey gator!

>saw this cute bird on Tuesday
what is it? a heron or a crane?

>>82822032
>okay so far.
that's good :]
and plns for today?
> how about you?
I'm good, had some classes and wanted to make a map but sadly no time :<
but I made an image of the idea for the man I had so at least that, it's this pic I posted
>weird feeling when that happens
I guess
but it's also pretty normal to not know which day of the week it is for me

>>82822036
hello Yuanon ^^
>even better. i don't have work tomorrow.
:0
that's great news!
so you get 3days of chill?
>catbro! how's your day?
okay, had some classes and wanted to make a map but no time to do that :<
but I made the idea I had for it into this image so that's something
now I'm just listening to musik and eating crap
how was your day? and watcha doing?

>>82822036
>least i feel better after visiting the thread and talking to you guys
that's good you do, it is really nice just chatting and chilling
>what is it? a heron or a crane?
i think it's a crane but I don't know anything about birds

>>82822122
>and plns for today?
probably just lay around I guess. do you?
>had some classes and wanted to make a map but sadly no time :<
aw that sucks classes are horrible they take so much time
>made an image of the idea for the man I had so at least that, it's this pic I posted
it looks very interesting and Cool,
>pretty normal to not know which day of the week it is for me
that's fair, when there's no real reason to know the days why remember

>>82822122
>so you get 3days of chill?
that's the plan and and i hope so, but you never know. fingers crossed.

>had some classes and wanted to make a map but no time to do that :<
that's too bad. :/ what about tomorrow?

>but I made the idea I had for it into this image so that's something
no clue what that image is supposed to mean or how that translates to a map, but i'll be curious what you'll come up with.

>now I'm just listening to musik and eating crap
sounds like a nice evening. i think i'll at least copy the latter part and eat whatever i find in the fridge.

>how was your day?
not great. couldn't focus at work at all today. somehow made it through, but no clue how. just glad the week end a bit early for me.

>and watcha doing?
nothing. just staring at the screen, hoping that i'll find something to watch or do. tried to play a round of brotato, but i lost and don't feel like giving it another go.

>>82822424
>it is really nice just chatting and chilling
agreed. especially when i'm in a mood like today.

>I don't know anything about birds
same. i guess it's a hobby to identify them for a reason. if it was easy, there wouldn't be much of a point.

>>82822424
>just lay around I guess.
sounds like alright plans :>
>do you?
right now I'm listening to music and soon I'll watch stream of guys I like playing random games
oh btw cool bird pic, it looks very big
>classes are horrible they take so much time
and then they might just be q waste if I'll drop out anyway
>looks very interesting and Cool
thank you
>when there's no real reason to know the days why remember
true true

>>82822611
>>82822611
>that's the plan and and i hope so
woo freedom \o/
>but you never know. fingers crossed.
uh oh, crossing my fingers and toes then
>what about tomorrow?
I can't '^'
I should be working on the graduation project, I'll have to do another presentation next week and I really haven't worked on it since the last one
>>82822611
>no clue what that image is supposed to mean
heck if I know too lol it just popped into my head
>sounds like a nice evening.
indeed :>
> eat whatever i find in the fridge.
okay, when you do tell me what ancient treasure you discovered there
>not great. couldn't focus at work
well at least it's over
>just staring at the screen
play mosa lina on itch io, it's a fun little game

I know you didn't ask but: cool songs i liked today
https://m.soundcloud.com/goyfriendisraelfart/dont-go
https://m.soundcloud.com/neetsongs/internet-buzzwords-latenite

feel free to share songs that u like too :>

>>82822849
>woo freedom \o/
still figuring out what to do with it. i'll probably head to my gaming store, look around and then maybe i'll work on my minis a bit. we'll see.

>crossing my fingers and toes then
much obliged, though i'd say at this point it's too late for them to bother me about showing up.

>I should be working on the graduation project, I'll have to do another presentation next week and I really haven't worked on it since the last one
sounds like you have some plans this weekend, but nothing you can't handle, i'm sure. (*^*)9

>heck if I know too lol it just popped into my head
i see. you'll make something of it at some point. give it some time.

>when you do tell me what ancient treasure you discovered there
just some meatballs i ate with a yogurt/harissa-sauce i made from scratch with some yogurt and harissa-paste.

>well at least it's over
until it starts again. :[

>play mosa lina on itch io, it's a fun little game
i'll check it out, but i just started another run. can't let this stupid character beat me. -_-

>>82822611
>especially when i'm in a mood like today.
what mind of mood might that be?
>guess it's a hobby to identify them for a reason.
true if it was easy wouldn't be fun lol is a cool hobby tho

>>82822849
>listening to music and soon I'll watch stream of guys I like playing random games
that sounds like a great way to spend a evening, hopefully the game is cool
>looks very big
it was quite big, very slow and sneaky as well tho, was barely moving
>they might just be q waste if I'll drop out anyway
oh yea that's not good, sounds hard to be motivated for them

>>82822989
very different but very good songs !

>>82822989
hm. nice ones, but i'm not sure what i could post. didn't really listen to anything interesting recently. let me think...

>>82823166
>what mind of mood might that be?
i don't know. just fed up with everything.

>is a cool hobby tho
at least you get out and have a good time.

>>82823048
>figuring out what to do with it
you can always go on a walk or watch blaaderunner (if you haven't)
>point it's too late for them to bother me about showing up.
it's a win win then or a lose lose for them :]
>but nothing you can't handle, i'm sure. (*^*)9
well see
>give it some time.
I have a couple of ideas but yeah like i said no time :<
>meatballs i ate with a yogurt/
meat and yoghurt??!
>until it starts again. :[
but then it also ends
>check it out,
it's a very simple browser game a nice little time waster
>can't let this stupid character beat me. -_-
best of luck \o/

>>82823166
>sounds like a great way to spend a evening
yep I'm having fun :]
>very slow and sneaky
ooa
did you see any other animals?
>sounds hard to be motivated for them
yep :<
>>82823227
ye :>

>>82823363
>not sure what i could post
it's okay u don't have to post anything

>>82823363
nah. can't think of anything. :[

>>82823385
>you can always go on a walk or watch blaaderunner (if you haven't)
true and no, i haven't. for some reason i completely forgot i wanted to do that. i think i'm too angry right now to engage with anything in a productive way.

>it's a win win then or a lose lose for them :]
i'm just glad i can sleep in tomorrow.

>well see
>.>

>no time :<
i'll remind you, when you do. ;D

>meat and yoghurt??!
sure. like tzatziki.

>but then it also ends
does it? i guess i'll just have to take your word for it.

>nice little time waster
don't have an excuse not to give it a go.

>best of luck \o/
lost again. i don't really get it

>it's okay u don't have to post anything
would be nice if i could, though.

>Any plans for today?
Spending tonight trying to emulate windows. Ending up on another distro hoping adventure.
>>82822036
>did you sleep well?
okay. It helps not needing to get up at 3am anymore.
>not sure how well it works for not-40k-fans, but as a fan i'm having a good time.
I don't consume much 40k but I think it's pretty good.

>>82823363
>don't know. just fed up with everything.
I'm sorry to hear that, everything can really suck a lot of the time it feels like
>least you get out and have a good time.
yea a hobby that gets you out and doing things is definitely a good one

>>82823385
>yep I'm having fun :]
yay ^^
>did you see any other animals?
some deer and some turtles

>>82823628
>Spending tonight trying to emulate windows
never understand how people do stuff with computers super interesting tho but super Complex i assume

>>82820479 (OP)
>How are you doing today?
blehhhh!!
>Any plans for today?
new stellaris dlc and modern physics work >;p
>When was the last time you hurt yourself?
three days ago!
>Why did you hurt yourself?
feels good ;pp
>Is there anything bothering you right now?
midterms >>

>>82823628
hey cynic!

>Spending tonight trying to emulate windows.
good luck.

>It helps not needing to get up at 3am anymore.
that's true. can be hard to adjust, though.

>I think it's pretty good.
hope we'll get a lot more episodes, then. :>

>>82823659
>I'm sorry to hear that, everything can really suck a lot of the time it feels like
it's ok. i just wish i wouldn't clench my teeth so much when i'm like this. starts to hurt at some point.

>a hobby that gets you out and doing things is definitely a good one
would it be something for you?

>>82823734
>blehhhh!!
word.

>new stellaris dlc and modern physics work >;p
hm. sounds like you got a very cerebral day ahead of you.

>three days ago!
:<

>feels good ;pp
fair enough

>midterms >>
good luck with those.

slepe time ~w~ byebye

>>82823533
>i'm too angry right now
well maybe you won't be too angry tomorrow
>lost again
sounds like a time to do something else
Have fun and think about that you have 3full days to have fun ahead of u :>
hay maybe we could find aome time to play peak

>>82823628
hello
>emulate windows
sounds like hell lol
but hope you have fun doing it

>>82823659
>deer and some turtles
wowo sounds like a really good day

>>82823734
hey anon
>>82823734
>blehhhh!!
gasp :0
good luck on your midterms

>>82824026
>slepe time ~w~ byebye
good night!

>well maybe you won't be too angry tomorrow
hopefully

>Have fun and think about that you have 3full days to have fun ahead of u :>
i'll try to focus on that.

>hay maybe we could find aome time to play peak
that would be nice, but i don't want to keep you from anything important. of course you can always tell me if you got some time. (^-^)

>>82823734
>new stellaris dlc and modern physics work >;p
sounds pretty interesting
>midterms
oh that's awful :/

>>82823962
>wouldn't clench my teeth so much when i'm like this.
oh yea that doesn't sound good, teeth stuff and pain is the worst from my experience
>would it be something for you?
probably not just cause seems a tad boring. would you like it though?

>>82824026
goodnight cat
>wowo sounds like a really good day
it was a great day ^^

>>82824572
>teeth stuff and pain is the worst from my experience
it can get quite bad. luckily i don't have to deal with any teeth-issues so far.

>would you like it though?
nah. it's fun to see them in the wild, but i don't care much about going out to especially look for animals. i'm sure they appreciate not being bothered.

gonna head to bed soon, i think. not much to do and it's getting late.

>>82824770
>don't have to deal with any teeth-issues
that's good at least, teeth stuff is awful to get worked on, i always dread them
>don't care much about going out to especially look for animals
yea understandable, and it makes it more exciting when you do see one
>gonna head to bed soon
okay goodnight and sleep well

hello everyone
i think most are sleeping
my cat was sleeping on my bed when i got back home and i'm allergic so when i lay on my bed my eyes went crazy for a while


>>82820479 (OP)
yo cat! hru?
>Any plans for today?
i think i'll just sleep soon
phew, it took a while til i can finally say that my only plan is to sleep for now
but it's just for a short time
what about you? any plans?

>>82815355
>you made the right choice.
yup i suppose, thanks yuanon!
>nothing left to do but to sit down and start studying.
lol i don't even have much to do but studying these days
>can't you just read or watch anm summary or watch some of the episodes you still remember?
i can but i'm kinda lazy
>relatively simple games and still have a good time.
exactly
>need to get back to that game eventually.
are you planning to finish it? woah
>to find the right point to switch is trickier than it seems.
i didn't expect an idea like this, it's so good really i thought the game was simpler. interesting actually

>not everything you watch needs to be some hours-long essay.
yup, not reels nor essays, lol


>>82815697
> i'd try the older xcoms but they seem a bit too micro heavy.
desu i know nothing about xcom, i don't remember playing at all, so what is it like?

>ig 5 years of near constant use will do that to anything.
yup maybe
>served me well tho.
same as my "chopped" laptop, actually it wasn't that bad like i could run some indie games but there was a software problem that made almost everything laggy, fixed it later but it's now in my table drawer.

>costed me 1k euro then too
ouch dude :O mine was cheap
hope you have a better device now mate

>>82823962
>good luck with those.
>>82824026
>good luck on your midterms

thank you >< on the bright side they mean im half done the semester so that's good ig

I told my therapist that I used to self harm a long time ago. I don't want to tell him I started it again, I don't want him to worry about me or do something radical in case he thinks I'm in immediate danger. Should I just keep it on the down-low for now?

>>82827066
do you think your therapist would panic if you told him

>>82827485
No probably not. Im just overreacting as usual.

tried cutting myself for the first time today, nicked out some super tiny razors, wasnt too deep. probably gonna repeat the process a night or two from now. any tips on hiding this shit from others?

>>82827732
The best way is obviously to not cut at all. But if that is not an option, don't cut deep. Deep cuts will never fully heal, the scars will be with you for life. And do it in places you don't expose to others.

>>82827732
aftercare is important, make sure you bandage properly and disinfect your blades (before/after) and wounds. otherwise, you're begging to get an infection

>>82827751
thighs or legs would probably be better than arms then since i typically wear jeans. going deeper dosent sound great so that shouldnt be a problem. already did it on my arms but its on the underside so it should be easy to cover up.

>>82827772
good tips. made sure to disinfect the best i could.

>>82827772
Yeah what >>82827769 says, use clean stuff so it doesn't get infected. Bandaids/bandages to help the cut heal as good as possible.

>>82827751
considering the alternatives (talking to others i know as friends, therapy or just straight up killing myself) its probably a good "interim" for now until i really decide on something to fix this. ive heard therapy is good but if i suddenly start telling those closest that im going to therapy its probably gonna make them look weird at me or ill have to face the reality of how everything is. im also lazy and broke, so oh well.

>>82827805
>if i suddenly start telling those closest that im going to therapy its probably gonna make them look weird at me or ill have to face the reality of how everything is
I know exactly how you feel. And I don't know what to tell you, I know I wouldn't have listened to anyone telling me what to do about this. My only tip is don't do anything you may regret later.
I held it in (depression, anxiety, etc) for 15 years. Then I burned out from work and 15 years of anxiety and depression all came out in the span of 2 weeks. It was hell. Since then I'm speaking to a therapist and taking medication. Family and friends are supportive, they probably always suspected something was up but after my burnout my family noticed I was a wreck and were the ones telling me I should talk to someone.

Stay safe out there, anon.

>>82827835
ill do my best to stay safe. killing myself is off the table and im hoping it stays that way. hope i dont worry anyone here tol much since the last thing i need is to give others a scare due to my own trivial stuff.

I wish anons a good luck

morning bump

another bump for now

Hey sludge here maybe you remember me maybe you dont
I just wanted to give an update since i feel like i owe one for a while now.
I got a new job, better hours better pay better work.

I also got clean from drugs finally, due to some things that happened (still do weed though but only at night)

I also dont drink hard liqour much anymore only with friends sometime, but usualy beer.

Oh yea i got a friend group now, i also had a previous one but that kinda fell apart but my best friend and i started this new one

All in all things are going better now, so i wanted to thank some people here for the support you showed me when i was down and out. Even if i didnt lisen then.
I kinda had to quit 4chan for my own good. So thats why i dissapeared

Waking up at 430 every day sucks balls thoughhhh but its easier then i pictured it

hello guys
I been to a store and got new sofas :>
how are you guys?

>>82828824
>name
oh yea also im going to germany this weekend with my friend to pick up a scooter for the engine so 6 hrs to and from. like a roadtrip. and im going to see my favorite stoner metal band live tonight
also have like 2-3 other concerts and maybe 3 that i havent booked tickets for yet

i actually wanted to go to the US next year to go to a festival to see FEMTANYL and machine girl but its only for people that go to a certain college.

going to see machine girl for the second time in a few months though and i met some 15 year old guy on reddit that also wants to go but he needed a like older guide because of his parents so me and my brother are taking him with probably. (already seen his face and he mine so no not a catfish or shady guy or anything like that)

so yea that idk why im typing this like i didnt just went up and ghosted everyone here. i guess its easier to talk about my feelings and opinions through a screen. instead of those things being stuck in my head.
sort of like a self regulation

>>82825200
>teeth stuff is awful to get worked on, i always dread them
hope you won't have to deal with it in the future.

>makes it more exciting when you do see one
yeah, but when you get surprised they're often up and away before you can take a pic.

>>82825616
>my cat was sleeping on my bed when i got back home and i'm allergic
can't catch a break :/

>i don't even have much to do but studying these days
that's good. at least that way you can focus on it.

>i can but i'm kinda lazy
or maybe just not in the mood atm?

>are you planning to finish it? woah
sure. i bought it, after all.

>i thought the game was simpler. interesting actually
it is a simple game, but there's lots of stats and tinkering with them can lead to very different runs.

>>82828824
hey sludge! long time no see! :D

>maybe you remember me maybe you dont
course i remember you and i missed you a lot. :<

>I got a new job, better hours better pay better work.
awesome! what do you do now?

>I also got clean from drugs finally, due to some things that happened (still do weed though but only at night)
that's good to hear. wanna talk about what got you away from them?

>I also dont drink hard liqour much anymore only with friends sometime
also for the better. i'm still slowly emptying my stash. usually i just drink on birth- or holidays now, so it'll probably take me a while until it's completely gone.

>i also had a previous one but that kinda fell apart but my best friend and i started this new one
you win some, you lose some. sounds like a better group overall, though. what are you guys up to?

>All in all things are going better now, so i wanted to thank some people here for the support you showed me
i'm just glad you were able to turn things around. i'm proud of you.

>I kinda had to quit 4chan for my own good. So thats why i dissapeared
understandable. i want to say don't be a stranger, but you need to do what's best for you. still hoping you'll stop by once in a while. you're always welcome.

>>82828824
>Waking up at 430 every day sucks balls thoughhhh but its easier then i pictured it
you get used to it after a while, but definitely not my favorite time, either. ^^

>>82828914
heyo!

>I been to a store and got new sofas :>
they better be really comfy.

>how are you guys?
not much better than yesterday. crawled out of bed at 1:00 pm, which is unusual for me at this point. not sure if i want to bother doing the things i thought about doing yesterday. maybe i should just take a shower and see how i feel then. you?

>>82828950
>>name
some stuff never changes. :p

>so 6 hrs to and from. like a roadtrip.
sounds fun. make sure to pack something to eat and don't buy food or gas at the motorway service stations. if you have to, look for something called an "autohof". those are stations right next but directly connected to the highway. they tend to be much cheaper.

>going to see my favorite stoner metal band live tonight
let's gooo! :D have a good time, dude.

>wanted to go to the US next year to go to a festival to see FEMTANYL and machine girl but its only for people that go to a certain college.
big trip just to see a band. :0 sorry you can't go, though. :/

>me and my brother are taking him with probably.
look at you. being all responsible and stuff. :> sounds like a good system, though. at least if the parents can't be bothered.

>idk why im typing this like i didnt just went up and ghosted everyone here.
we're just glad you're doing well. no hard feelings. and, as i said, you're always welcome here and that will never change.

>i guess its easier to talk about my feelings and opinions through a screen.
it always is, isn't it?

>>82820479 (OP)
/cat/ is made to be spooned and called good boy.

>>82828914
yo cat!
>I been to a store and got new sofas
that's nice! is it for you room?

>how are you guys?
a bit numb, wbu?

>>82828824
>>82828950
yo sludge! you've been through alot of good mate! hope you keep up and get even better. good luck pal

>>82828972
>that's good. at least that way you can focus on it.
good for studying not for overall health to be honest, i'm feeling so strange

>or maybe just not in the mood atm?
hmm maybe

>sure. i bought it, after all.
oh i think it's cheap but it depends on the country, right?

>with them can lead to very different runs.
i like it when a game does this.

>>82829073
>rememberme
Has a new femboy joined the board?

>>82828914
nearly forgot: i watched a streamer playing a game called look outside yesterday. maybe that's a game for you.

>>82829073
>good for studying not for overall health to be honest, i'm feeling so strange
hm. i'm feeling strange, too. like nothing is moving in the right direction or everything is and i'm just left behind, which seems to make me angry. it's odd. what makes you feel that way?

>i think it's cheap but it depends on the country, right?
it's 20 euro, so not super cheap, but also not expensive for what's being offered.

>i like it when a game does this
game has been around for a while and still has staying power. it's just a very solid entry in the genre.

>>82828972
hey sludge! long time no see! :D
hey hey

>course i remember you and i missed you a lot. :<
that means a lot man, sorry for leaving but i needed to work on my life

>awesome! what do you do now?
gonna sound goofy but i work in a cheese factory as a line operator

>wanna talk about what got you away from them?
well my brother and i used drugs since 14 but unlike me he never got a fulltime job to limit his addiction so one night he got bored and manic and mixxed a lot of shit that doesnt mix and went into a psychosis

and the first time i talked to him when he was in psychosis he believed i killed my mom and the police were on their way

and i didnt feel shokked angry or sad but in that week all i could feel was a brutal and real all empowering sense of doom and dread washing up on the shores of my head, creeping its way into my nervous system.
it felt like the very concept of putrifiction was making love to my brain.

after it was said and done i quit drugs not because i care or fear that that could happen to me but because i cannot let my brother get near any substances after that.

> i'm still slowly emptying my stash
i never even liked the taste of it thats like the sad part i just did it to get fucked up quick uggh

>what are you guys up to?
not much mostly hanging out we sometimes go to a metal bar in tilburg and we wanna go with the group to a concert sometime

>i'm just glad you were able to turn things around. i'm proud of you.
thank you really means a lot man but im kind of frustraded when i think back because i was just so self sabotaging and woe is me and all that

> i want to say don't be a stranger, but you need to do what's best for you. still hoping you'll stop by once in a while
ill probably visit more now that things are going better. i just really needed to fix my shit but im way more mentally stable now.

>>82829049
>some stuff never changes. :p
im telling you man i swear i put it in on the heavens

>sounds fun
yea man im excited

>make sure to pack something to eat and don't buy food or gas at the motorway service stations
huh why not? i like the slop they have there atleast here in NL

>those are stations right next but directly connected to the highway. they tend to be much cheaper.
thanks for the tip if i see one ill visit it, but that just sounds like a gas station without the gas no? so just a station then lol

>let's gooo! :D have a good time, dude.
will do, i have a custom tie dye shirt from that band that ill finally wear, usually not my style

>big trip just to see a band
yea but ive got the savings and i realllllyy want to see femtanyl but she never plays in europe

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HYyhM5UDXYs

>look at you. being all responsible and stuff.
yeah lol never would have guessed, we are trying to get a time to meet with him and the dad to actually see eachother in person to see if the vibes are good

>, you're always welcome here and that will never change.
>it always is, isn't it?
it is, except for the part where i cant say thank you in the way i want, because words cant convey the gratitude i feel

>>No.82829073
>yo sludge! you've been through alot of good mate! hope you keep up and get even better. good luck pal
thanks man really. dont get me wrong a lot of it happened to me but its also a lot of hard work. it isnt easy to crawl out of a place like that mentally and sometimes its not easy to keep out of it.

>>82829161
>like nothing is moving in the right direction or everything is and i'm just left behind
it sounds like the same problem you talked about before no?
anyways i know that's really annoying, isn't there something that feels like it would fix it? maybe starting something new in your life?
or maybe changing something?

>what makes you feel that way?
something strange making me forget my problems but still making me suffer from it, i'm trying to remember what used to make feel like i wanna die or explode or whatever but i can't, overall it seems like i barely feel anything when i'm not waiting for anything about studying these days.
i stopped using a chatting app lately, it used to make like 90% of my social connection with people for years, i'll get back to it once i meet a therapist but anyways leaving that app left a huge emptiness

>it's 20 euro, so not super cheap, but also not expensive for what's being offered.
oh yup also it'll be a long journey for only 20 euros, yeah not expensive

>it's just a very solid entry in the genre.
someday i'll take my first step into it.
btw hru today yuanon?

>>82829091
not a femboy but i'm here, started actually posting here a while ago

>>82828824
hello sludge it's very nice to see you again!!
>got a new job
>clean from drugs
>dont drink hard
>got a friend group now
wow
that sounds like a lot of good things I'm very glad you're better and proud of you for managing that!
>So thats why i dissapeared
that's alright
but it nice to hear from you again
>Waking up at 430
why so early? area those them better hours you were talking about?
hm though I'm guessing it's because you also have to deal with school right?

>>82829049
hey yuanon
>better be really comfy.
they're okay
I don't like em too soft anyway
>not much better than yesterday
unfortunate but at least no work today
and yes can use today to recover and still have the whole weekend for stuff
>out of bed at 1:00 pm
unusually early or late for you?
>not sure if i want to bother doing the things
you don't have to but you could at least do one of those things to feel like you did something today (if you want to)
or put on a movie
>should just take a shower and see how i feel then.
have a nice shower
>you?
I'm alright, also don't feel like doing anything, I'm just going to chill and start working on the project tomorrow
>>82829161
>called look outside yesterday.
never heard of it is it new?
>maybe that's a game for you.
I looked it up it looks interesting but I don't feel like gaming
though I was thinking about maybe playing earthbound again

>>82829073
hello
>is it for you room?
yep :D
the old ones were, well, pretty old
>a bit numb
hm I'm wondering what could help you
what helpd you last time?
Do you have to be doing something now or can you chill?
>wbu?
alright
I don't really wanna do anything today
I'll try to watch something interesting on yt

>>82829239
>sorry for leaving but i needed to work on my life
all good. it was definitely worth it, i'd say.

>gonna sound goofy but i work in a cheese factory as a line operator
nothing particularly goofy about it. someone's gotta do it and when pay and hours are alright, why not?

>i quit drugs not because i care or fear that that could happen to me but because i cannot let my brother get near any substances after that.
must have been a rough experience. weirdly enough we rarely change for our own sake and usually do it for the people we care about. probably the best reason to change something about yourself.

>i never even liked the taste of it thats like the sad part i just did it to get fucked up quick uggh
fair, but there's cheaper and better ways to just get wasted than what i'm drinking. ^^

>mostly hanging out we sometimes go to a metal bar in tilburg and we wanna go with the group to a concert sometime
sounds chill. as chill as a metal bar can get, i suppose... what kind of concert would you all go to? is there a band you all could agree on or is that the most limiting factor?

>im kind of frustraded when i think back because i was just so self sabotaging and woe is me and all that
i understand that, but the thing is that until it clicks in your own head, there's nothing anybody else can do to change you. you needed to make the experiences you did in order to get to that point and you came to the right conclusion, even if it took you a while. it's the best you could have done given your situation and you did it. you did well.

>ill probably visit more now that things are going better.
looking forward to it, but always focus on yourself first. we'll wait for you.

>im way more mentally stable now.
maybe not as exciting as other states of mind, but a good baseline feeling, isn't it?

>>82829312
>i like the slop they have there atleast here in NL
even if you like it, the prices are completely insane for what you get. it's just extortion because you don't know where else to go.

>that just sounds like a gas station without the gas no? so just a station then lol
an "autohof" is usually just a slightly bigger gas station next to the highway (you have to take an exit to get there), the "autobahnraststaette" is a complex directly connected to the highway where you can buy food, use the toilet and get what else you might want on your travels (usually right next to it there's also a gas station), you'll just pay way more for the latter because it's basically a monopoly with no competition.

>i have a custom tie dye shirt from that band that ill finally wear, usually not my style
i'm sure they'll appreciate you dressing for the occasion. ;D

>we are trying to get a time to meet with him and the dad to actually see eachother in person to see if the vibes are good
good thinking. would suck if you didn't get along and ruined the whole event for all of you.

>except for the part where i cant say thank you in the way i want, because words cant convey the gratitude i feel
don't worry, we all know what you mean and i think most of us feel the same. a little support can go a long way.

>>82829448
>isn't there something that feels like it would fix it? maybe starting something new in your life? or maybe changing something?
i'll be forced to do that sooner or later anyway. not exactly sure when, but it'll happen eventually.

>overall it seems like i barely feel anything when i'm not waiting for anything about studying these days.
does sound a bit like depression, but i always say that cause i know that symptom quite well.

>>82829448
>i stopped using a chatting app lately, it used to make like 90% of my social connection with people for years
no wonder it left you feeling empty. social media is one hell of a drug. good you're having the patience to wait until you talked with your therapist about it before you jump back in.

>it'll be a long journey for only 20 euros, yeah not expensive
i think i just have to follow the main plot for a while until i get back to exploring the parts that made me mad last time.

>hru today
not as well as i'd would like to be, but not as bad as yesterday, either. i think i'll just use today to recharge and get ready for tomorrow.

>>82829574
>they're okay I don't like em too soft anyway
i guess that's ok when combined with a comfy blanket.

>can use today to recover and still have the whole weekend for stuff
true. i have to check with my friends when they want to meet tomorrow.

>unusually early or late for you?
late. i tend to be up a but earlier, but my sleep schedule has been quite bad lately. :/

>you could at least do one of those things to feel like you did something today (if you want to) or put on a movie
i'll see if i have the motivation to do that later in the evening. i really should work on my minis.

>have a nice shower
thanks, i did. :>

>I'm just going to chill and start working on the project tomorrow
solid plan. what will you do to chill, though?

>never heard of it is it new?
came out this year, i think. don't know when, though. it's a bit like earthbound, but cosmic horror.

>I don't feel like gaming though I was thinking about maybe playing earthbound again
don't have to if you don't want to.

i think i'll check out for a while. maybe get some groceries. see you guys later!

It's a brutal week but it's finally the weekend. How's everyone else doing?

>>82828824
Hey Sludge! I think everyone who's been here a long time can remember most posters who were around enough. I do wonder how everyone who's been gone is doing time to time. Always hope everyone is gone because they're doing better off, so glad to hear it was the case with you. Lots of good progress there and genuinely happy to hear all that.
>Waking up at 430 every day sucks balls
highly relatable :/

>>82830493
hi officeanon!

>It's a brutal week but it's finally the weekend.
glad you made it through. want to vent about it? any plans?

>How's everyone else doing?
doing fine now. not great, but it's getting better. still stuck on that stupid brotato character, though. >:[

and i really need to reorganize my yua-folder. since the last update my phone decided that i can only have 2 pics per row while searching instead of 4, so now it take ages. why are devs like this?

man. i'm home alone and a guest visited our house and i had to greet him and do whatever people do greeting guests.
my introversion hits hard.
gladfully my family came home quickly so i didn't have to deal with him a lot.
not really tho, i had to deal with him again later but it wasn't that bad.
it was bad but i put up with the thing.

>>82829598
>the old ones were, well, pretty old
mhm i see, well congrats on the new sofas!

>what helpd you last time?
i don't really remember i think it just went away somehow.

>Do you have to be doing something now or can you chill?
i could chill, it helps distracting me from the nothingness xD
i watched some youtube videos while eating.

>I'll try to watch something interesting on yt
have fun pal!

>>82830139
>but it'll happen eventually.
i hope everything goes well pal. :>

>a bit like depression
yup i think of this too, but at the end i can't really name the problem by a scientific name.
i'll see what the therapist might say.

>but i always say that cause i know that symptom quite well.
i hope you're doing better now. are you doing better :?

>social media is one hell of a drug.
indeed. even though i really love social media but it's indeed very harmful.

>wait until you talked with your therapist about it
yup. i have to wait 25 more days until i finally meet the therapist.

>to follow the main plot
how do you know the main plot path? this metroidvania kills me

>not as bad as yesterday
enjoy whatever you can enjoy pal!! hope you find your happiness soon!

>i think i'll just use today to recharge and get ready for tomorrow.
good luck for tomorrow!

good morning

>>82825616
>my cat was sleeping on my bed
aw cats are really sweet, they probably missed you.
adorable cat pic btw

>>82828824
hey sludge was wondering where you were, glad to hear things are going well, god knows you deserve it <3
>dont drink hard liqour much anymore
smart, being able to cut back on stuff like that is super important
>had to quit 4chan for my own good
very smart, 4chan can be horrible and only hurting a lot of the time

>>82828914
Ooo nice, new sofa is awesome

>>82828950
>roadtrip
roadtrips are the best just enjoying the views and different landscape, always a good time with friends
>easier to talk about my feelings and opinions through a screen
well your always welcome to come and talk or ramble here, it's always nice hearing from you and what your up to

>>82828972
>hope you won't have to deal with it in the future.
yea hopefully not
>they're often up and away before you can take a pic.
true, always hate when I'm about to take a cool pic and the thing just runs off

>>82830493
yo mate!
> it's finally the weekend.
yeah finally. wanna talk about your week? you got any plans?

>How's everyone else doing?
kinda numb again, just waiting for some things to happen. what about you?

>>82830888
gm gator!

>aw cats are really sweet, they probably missed you.
now idk if he missed me, but he loves my bed xD
>adorable cat pic btw
i also do notice the pics you post, i really like them lol

thread still up, cool
>>82823659
>never understand how people do stuff with computers
I think people just don't explain it well. I for example, run a universal blue system, so I don't touch the OS, I just have to set up sandboxes for applications.
Meaning, all I have to do is look up code tutorals and add a box for it in the boxes app.
>>82823962
hi yu
>hope we'll get a lot more episodes, then. :>
I feel like the threat that we won't get more without buying merch is a joke.
>>82820479 (OP)
>Any plans for today?
going to a haunted trail, see you guys later.

>>82830864
Hey Yuanon!
> want to vent about it?
don't really need to. Just work needing to be as miserable as humanly possible. Literally no reason for things should suck this much, but unavoidable.
>any plans?
not especially this weekend. Will go out to eat and visit a bookstore maybe, but that's about it other than chores
> stuck on that stupid brotato character,
i look this up and maybe it's just me, but these types of hard games that just punish you nonstop just seem too much for me
>reorganize my yua-folder.
i usually post via desktop and have one folder for all of 4chan, a quarter groundhog, a quarter random funny stuff, and half anime girl. I really should make subfolders but then i'd have to sort everything
>why are devs like this?
devs be like, why not??

>>82830884
hey rm!
>my introversion hits hard.
i'm honestly not even that introverted, but house guests you don't expect are always tricky honestly. Nobody likes dealing with that. Hope you're more relaxed now
>>82830904
>wanna talk about your week?
i just don't like my job and it's a source of much stress. Finding a new one isn't easy since things right now are not great here and lots of people don't even have a job at all. I'm fine overall, just bit worn out mentally from constantly planning what I need to do to stay afloat
>you got any plans?
just usual shopping and eating out. Nothing special, but no main job at least
what about you, any plans?
>kinda numb again, just waiting for some things to happen.
sorry to hear that. What's it your waiting if you don't mind me asking?

>>82830196
>that's ok when combined with a comfy blanket.
yep :]
>have to check with my friends when they want to meet tomorrow.
so you going to workout?
>tend to be up a but earlie
I guess after that whole week you needed some more rest
>really should work on my minis.
that's nice too
hope you have fun with that
>what will you do to chill, though?
I wasn't sure but I found a vid about the demiurge, it's pretty interesting
>earthbound, but cosmic horror.
hm maybe I'll play it some but but not very interested desu
>maybe get some groceries. see you guys later!
see ya
tell us what you did

>>82830493
Helo
>brutal week
grr >:c
>How's everyone else doing?
alright just chilling

>>82830884
Hello
>guest visited our house and i had to greet him
oh no :o
at least y survived
what if you didn't let him in?
>congrats on the new sofas!
heh thank you
>think it just went away somehow.
hm maybe do you feel like you could do something like maybe draw a doodle
>watched some youtube videos while eating.
that's nice
anything interesting?
>have fun pal!
thnaks :D

>>82830888
heyyo how is your day today??

>>82830888
heya gator, how are you?

>>82830913
hey cynic!
>going to a haunted trail
have fun!
Keep forgetting it's almost halloween

>>82830913
>going to a haunted trail
spookyy :o
are you scared?

>>82830884
>guest visited our house
dealing with people you don't know is the worst thing to deal with much rather just be left alone.
>but i put up with the thing.
well done, hopefully you don't have to deal with that again

>>82830909
>but he loves my bed xD
well at least he loves something hehe
>also do notice the pics you post
well thanks i try to have them good lol

>>82830913
>run a universal blue system, so I don't touch the OS,
okay i wouldn't even know how that's possible but does seem much better then dealing with a annoying OS
>going to a haunted trail
Oo have fun !!

>>82831015
>heyyo how is your day today??
its been okay, I've basically just been looking at stuff online. how about you?

>>82831021
>heya gator, how are you?
hey office, it's going alright just looking at random stuff online. what about you?

>>82831003
>Nobody likes dealing with that.
yup
>Hope you're more relaxed now
i am, thanks!

>worn out mentally from constantly planning what I need to do to stay afloat
i see, i suppose you have to wait until the environment get better at that case so you can find a suitable job?
plus i hope things get easy on you mate. good luck.

>just usual shopping and eating out. Nothing special, but no main job at least
interesting, have fun!

>what about you, any plans?
not really, i should study. but i can spend time on youtube or whatever.

>What's it your waiting if you don't mind me asking?
oh it's the meeting with the therapist. about 25 days. been already waiting for weeks, i should wait more.

>>82831015
wizard cat
>at least y survived
yup
>what if you didn't let him in?
nah that was gonna be a problem, i suppose he knows that i'm home

>hm maybe do you feel like you could do something like maybe draw a doodle
i'm the worst at drawing honestly
i know it shouldn't be perfect but i like feeling that the work i'm doing has a soul
i write sometimes, but studying doesn't let me have enough will to do so. but even writing requires me to feel anything so i can "write" it down into some sort of written emotions.

>anything interesting?
not really :/
wbu?

>>82831144
>rather just be left alone.
yup, i actually know the guest but overall i'd like not to deal with guests sometimes xD

>>82831144
>well at least he loves something hehe
lol yup
>well thanks i try to have them good lol
you do have them good!

>>82820479 (OP)
hate all of you doesn't matter what you say fuck all of you fags in your safe spaces nope don't-stop typing faggot

>>82831015
hey cat! how are you?
>grr
i'm a broken record at this point. I know it's bad, but it's bad everywhere now. So hard to figure what to do.
>alright just chilling
up to anything fun or not really?

>>82831144
>ooking at random stuff online.
ooh like what?
> what about you?
not a whole lot. Posting here and making sure I'm done for the day, that's about till i get some food in a bit

>>82831198
>wait until the environment get better
which I hope is soon, but i don't have high hopes. My area is one of the worst in the states due to the gov chaos in addition to weak economy. Just perfect storm of bad conditions. But I've been through plenty of bad times so I'll figure out how to get through this
> i can spend time on youtube or whatever.
how we all spend our time without plans lol Why I try to actually note down what i'm doing even with free time so I don't just scroll shorts
>the meeting with the therapist.
ah well will come sooner than you realize. Just think about what you'll say when time comes

>>82831330
This was me, but posting in a few other threads

>>82830884
>it was bad but i put up with the thing.
always annoying, but good job soldiering through. o7

>i hope everything goes well pal. :>
thank you.

>at the end i can't really name the problem by a scientific name.
depression is an illness with a set of symptoms than can vary depending on sex, age and progression. it's not just freling sad for no reason and a lack of emotions can be one.

>i'll see what the therapist might say.
hope they'll be able to help.

>i really love social media
it's fun, but most addicitve things are before they become a problem. :/

>25 more days
quite some time, but even that will pass.

>how do you know the main plot path?
you have a questlog and the main quest goal is shown as a big symbol on your map. you miss out a lot of metroidvania staples like doublejump if you just follow it, but you only get those after some insanely annoying jump passages. it's up to you if you want some gameplay improvements at the cost of your sanity.

>this metroidvania kills me
yeah. me, too. they really found a way to suck the fun out of it.

>hope you find your happiness soon!
that would be nice.

>good luck for tomorrow!
yeahm good luck to both of us.

>>82830888
morning, gator!

>always hate when I'm about to take a cool pic and the thing just runs off
there are always a lot of squirrels at my parents cabin and one was crossing my path, so naturally i wanted to take a pic, but we were leaving and i was hauling luggage to the car and it got away. maybe i'll be able to take a pic of them this year.

>>82830913
hi cynic!

>the threat that we won't get more without buying merch is a joke.
they do need money if they want to stay independent. hopefully they manage. wouldn't mind buying some psycho warrior miniatures, though. ^^ maybe i'll even shell out for some merch at some point, but i'll have to check where it comes from and how much i have to pay in taxes and customs

>going to a haunted trail, see you guys later
don't get spooped too much. see ya!

hey everyone, today was too hard mentally so i didn't really go online a whole lot. played a bit more warhammer but i really don't understand the game very well (still winning but imma be honest no fucking clue how)

>>82831003
>Literally no reason for things should suck this much, but unavoidable.
they supposed to suck, so you feel bad. systems working pretty much as intended. in their mind, if they don't work you until you do, they're not getting their money's worth out of you. if you're stressed just shortly before breaking point, that's ideal.

>Will go out to eat and visit a bookstore maybe, but that's about it other than chores
that's a nice weekend. though you remind me, i put some laundry in the washing machine. i should check on that...

>these types of hard games that just punish you nonstop just seem too much for me
i'm one of those weirdo's who wants a challenge in their games. like, i'll never understand the appeal of the dynasty warrior games. well, i do, but i'd never want to play stuff like that myself. i understand when people just want to turn of their brain and see numbers go up. the issue i'm having rn is that i don't know if it's a skill isse, rng issue or if i haven't unlocked the run winning item yet. the reward for sticking with it is finding that one run where everything just clicks. same in binding of issac or enter the gungeon.

>I really should make subfolders but then i'd have to sort everything
this. i've sorted my phone by hooking it to my pc, but i haven't found the motivation to sort and restructure the yua-one. ngl, would save me a lot of time while posting.

>why not??
because i don't like things that are different. especially when they're factually worse than thing i got used to. :<

>>82831015
>so you going to workout?
as it look we will on sunday. not gonna complain, though. then i should be able to get some of the stuff i wanted to do today done tomorrow.

>I guess after that whole week you needed some more rest
i stayed up quite a long time yesterday as well. i suspect there's a connection there. need to investigate.

>the demiurge, it's pretty interesting
i hear that word a lot. they even called a race in 40k a lot. what does it mean?

>>82831214
>know the guest but overall i'd like not to deal with guests sometimes xD
guess that makes it a bit better but yea still mostly sucks dealing with people randomly showing up hehe
>you do have them good!
thanks you post very good stuff too

>>82831330
>ooh like what?
just like random clothes or school stuff
>Posting here and making sure I'm done for the day,
well always good to relax and chill out at the end of the day
>get some food in a bit
hope you make something super delicious :D

>>82831352
>lot of squirrels at my parents cabin
that's nice, i always love seeing cute squirrels
>and it got away.
aw they really do get scared at everything sometimes
>maybe i'll be able to take a pic of them this year.
hopefully<3

>>82831417
sorry to hear things haven't been good for you :/
>still winning
well that's all that really matters i guess lol

>>82831015
>maybe I'll play it some but but not very interested
no need to bother with something you're not feeling.

>tell us what you did
just went out do get some ingredients for apple/cinnamon porridge and also got some chocolate and a softdrink. regret the sweet stuff, but that's how it goes.

>>82831322
that's ok.

>>82831417
hi chev! :D

>today was too hard mentally
what got you down?

>i really don't understand the game very well (still winning but imma be honest no fucking clue how)
beats losing and not knowing why. ^^

>>82831533
>i always love seeing cute squirrels
me, too. :>

>they really do get scared at everything sometimes
i don't think it was scarred. it's a resort, so i suppose people are feeding them and they lose interest when they figure they're not getting anything.

>>82831330
>Just perfect storm of bad conditions.
sheesh dude that's messed up
>been through plenty of bad times so I'll figure out how to get through this
good luck! may you even get a better job.

>how we all spend our time without plans lol
lol yup

>so I don't just scroll shorts
this might be one of the worst things to spend time with, shorts are just literal brain rot, like i mean literally brain "rot" it really messes the brain up, like any other addiction.

>Just think about what you'll say when time comes
that's another problem mate, so i've been a bit numb and trying to remember what used to make me suffer, oh well i can't really remember everything. i can't remember but not as if things never happened, i still feel bad but without fully recalling the reason.

>>82831352
>but good job soldiering through.
thanks mate!

>sad for no reason and a lack of emotions can be one.
exactly. so since i don't know all symptoms and can't just decide if i have it or not i would just wait for the diagnosis.

>but most addicitve things are before they become a problem
yup. especially when you start linking emotions to whatever you're addicted to

>but even that will pass.
yup. as everything else.

>it's up to you if you want some gameplay improvements at the cost of your sanity.
>they really found a way to suck the fun out of it.
oh that's pretty boring for me these days, i'd like to play something simple and direct these days.

>yeah good luck to both of us.
:>

>>82831417
hey chev!
>too hard mentally so i didn't really go online a whole lot.
sorry to hear this. wanna talk about it?

>(still winning but imma be honest no fucking clue how)
lol i hope it feels rewarding tho

>>82831533
>mostly sucks dealing with people randomly showing up hehe
exactly
>thanks you post very good stuff too
thanks!

>>82831144
>I've basically just been looking at stuff online.
found anything cool?
>how about you?
I'm doing the same just watching some videos now :]

>>82831198
>wizard cat
he casts yarn ball
>that was gonna be a problem, i suppose he knows that i'm home
:/
well I believe you don't have to let people in if you don't want to but I know how itnis sometimes
>the worst at drawing honestly
even bad doodles are good I think :>
but you don't have to
>but studying doesn't let me
yeah I know that feel :<
>writing requires me to feel anything so i can "write"
hm yaeh sounds like a problem
>wbu?
a couple of stuff but not I'm listening stuff about demiurge
and other than that I have a playlist of videos I find interesting or important in some way so I'm also browsing that

>>82831330
Hello :>
>broken record at this point.
it's not ur fault I'm not mad at u
>anything fun or not really?
hm just watching vidoes on yt, I'd say pretty fun
I'm watching videos from my playlist and some stuff about demiurge
oh also gonna listen to some music probably soon

>>82831417
heyo
>was too hard mentally
what happened?
at least the weekend is now so you can rest a little from stresses I hope
>really don't understand the game very well (still winning
you're just naturally good :]

>>82831510
>as it look we will on sunday. not gonna complain
okay then hope you have fun and get stuff done
>>82831510
>suspect there's a connection there
what? but there's no way :o
>what does it mean?
basically that jewish/christian god isn't all good and all knowing but is sorta like a human, getting jealous and is cruel sometimes, sorta the way greek gods are seen now
There's a bigger story there I can tell you if you wanna

>>82831588
>bother with something you're not feeling.
true but I might also find something fun that way
>ingredients for apple/cinnamon porridge
woa
>regret the sweet stuff
oh it's okay to have some, as a little treat

>>82831865
>he casts yarn ball
lol
>but I know how itnis sometimes
yep. happens.
>even bad doodles are good I think :>
i should try some day :>
>I have a playlist of videos I find interesting or important in some way so I'm also browsing that
that's nice pal, hope you leave it with the best knowledge :>

>>82831588
>people are feeding them and they lose interest when they figure they're not getting anything.
oh lol well that does make more sense then hehe
>>82831713
aww that dog is soo fluffy and adorable and silly hehe
>>82831865
>found anything cool?
not really this somewhat interesting tho https://youtu.be/UdZTFXNmq5U?si=YcKA5sQ3CO73Nxk2
>watching some videos now :]
that's perfect and fun then !

honestly i think the doubts are hunting me now, i should not have thought alot about it
but eh, everything will pass.

>>82832143
>fluffy and adorable and silly
silly dogs ftw

>>82831417
hey chev!
>winning but imma be honest no fucking clue how
how I feel anytime i play an rts game. Suppose that's how it usually works in real life too

>>82831510
>if you're stressed just shortly before breaking point, that's ideal.
I think as a whole this is true, but there's a lot of people making things shitty who don't even realize it. I swear I had an okay job before, nothing like this even if it wasn't perfect
>wants a challenge in their games.
that's fine to me and i hear you on the dynasty warrior comment. I don't want cake walk, but I mean games that leave you more stressed out everytime you play it(though Umamusume had me tense for a while till I got good :<) which seems to be par for the course with those types. I guess I'm so high strung these days I don't have patience for a game making me feel worse
> especially when they're factually worse than thing i got used to
the problem is that for some reason developers don't consider worse user experience to be a reason not to do something. Many such cases.

>>82831533
>just like random clothes
ah always turns into a big time sink for me. Used to put zero effort but spend more time shopping for these since getting older
>hope you make something super delicious
my normal chicken and rice. Not super delicious, but good enough. Tomorrow will be better and going out, so today can be boring

>>82831680
> that's messed up
it's life unfortunately. Not much regular people can do when everyone us is going to shit
> you even get a better job.
all i really hope is something not stressful and stable. Will see how finding that these day goes
>this might be one of the worst things to spend time with
i used to have interesting ones related to topics I was interested in, before getting progressively worse and worse lol

>>82831944
>should try some day :>
wouldn't hurt but no pressure ^^
>nice pal, hope you leave it with the best knowledge :>
thank you
>>82832196
>think the doubts are hunting me now
what do u mean?
hey maybe you should watch a movie or something to distract yourself a little
is there something you'd like to watch? or maybe you want some recommendations?

>>82832143
>this somewhat interesting
woa what a loong video :0
but it seems interesting (the old show) maybe I'll watch it but not now so wanna say what the video's about more or less?
>perfect and fun then !
yep
I'll probably also look at some short animations they're fun
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=CibNswxHOcA&list=PLoeK8V36zVtM3pafCPnQR1Em3riuJiSgP&index=463&pp=gAQBiAQB

>>82831680
>. i can't remember but not as if things never happened, i still feel bad but without fully recalling the reason.
maybe that is a good starting point in and of itself. Just saying that you feel that way and have a hard time figuring why and can work back. Don't need to have everything figured out at the start, just what you want to focus on first

>>82831865
>it's not ur fault I'm not mad at u
thanks, i'm more mad at myself for putting up with it, but like I also said, only so much I can do when things just aren't looking good all around
>demiurge
saw you mention this to Yuanon. Reminded me of when I got into reading weird books and writings about Gnosticism. Don't remember a whole lot, but remember there being like an evil god vs a good and a lot of other godlike beings. I think what you said about the greek gods is spot on, since if I remember this whole thing was the blending of early Christianity with Greek mystic religions. Very trippy spiritual beliefs that I don't think come a lot unless you look for it, though the Japanese find it interesting to put into video games like SMT

>>82832293
>it's life
yup, nothing to do about it sometimes
>will see how finding that these days goes
good luck :>

>progressively worse and worse
i think alot went through this, until we reached a point we would watch some trash mindlessly xd

>>82832313
>what do u mean?
i prefer not explaining now desu perhaps it could get better :)
>distract yourself
yup this.
>watch
i think i will watch something
thanks cat, really :>

>>82832398
>just what you want to focus on first
hopefully it's a good starting point
thanks mate!

>>82831680
>since i don't know all symptoms and can't just decide if i have it or not i would just wait for the diagnosis
i see. good way of going about it.

>especially when you start linking emotions to whatever you're addicted to
i think i mostly avoided that, big exception is probably food. that's the hardest one to get rid off.

>i'd like to play something simple and direct these days.
reasonable approach. i have little patience for things i'm supposed to engage with wasting my time.

>>82831865
>hope you have fun and get stuff done
same to you :>

>but there's no way :o
i know it sounds crazy, but there might be something to it. we'll see if i'll find more of a connection tonight. hope i can fall asleep a bit earlier, though.

>sorta like a human, getting jealous and is cruel sometimes
what gave it away? firebombing entire cities and turning people into salt?

>There's a bigger story there I can tell you if you wanna
sure. sorry it took me so long to reply, though. i kinda checked out mentally.

>I might also find something fun that way
always a possibility.

>as a little treat
is it really a treat if i just physically feel worse after eating it?

>>82832143
>that does make more sense then hehe
they gotta look out for the raptors, though. lots of those just circling above the resort catching rodents that aren't careful.

>>82832293
>there's a lot of people making things shitty who don't even realize it. I swear I had an okay job before, nothing like this even if it wasn't perfect
i'll concede that some if not most people are just not competent enough for the role they're supposed to fulfill. it's just more comforting to suspect evil when the actual cause is just stupid. you can expose and expel evil. stupid? that's way harder to deal with.

>>82832293
>I guess I'm so high strung these days I don't have patience for a game making me feel worse
everyone has their limits to what they want to deal with. to me the reward of finally winning is usually worth it, but that means you sometimes run into games that are just frustrating instead of a challenge. i understand that you don't have the patience to deal with a games bullshit after dealing with works bullshit all day. i just feel there aren't many games that walk the line very well anymore.

>developers don't consider worse user experience to be a reason not to do something.
perfect is the enemy of progress (and sales).

>>82832398
>only so much I can do when things just aren't looking good all around
yep everything sucks
>being like an evil god vs a good
yep because at the time there emerged a belief that a god has to be good
and for example greeks started rewriting their myths and either removing the elements they didn't like or saying they're alegories and at a similar time jews/christians started doing similar things
mainly because what happened was that egyptians had a beef with them and called out how evil their god is and god can't be evil so he's either good just misunderstood or bad which means he's not god so this is how the demiurge idea sorta came to be
And there were wrestling with those ideas and an interesting one was an idea saying that actually jesus is god because hes good but the being in the old testament isn't a god because he is evil and wanted to destroy the real god jesus so that's why jesus got crucified
and that believe called marcionism was pretty popular and even though it doesn't exist anymore even now "standard" christians often make a distinction between god of the old and new testaments like they're different beings
I'm not religious at all but I like the history of it how the way people view gods changed

>>82832442
>prefer not explaining now
okay
>perhaps it could get better :)
I hope so :<
>yup this
smart ^^
>will watch something
what you gonna watch?
>thanks cat, really :>
on no problem fren

>>82831533
hiya gator
>well that's all that really matters i guess lol
yeah, i'm probably playing the game wrong but i'll just finish this campaign and then look at a guide. i'm kinda suprised i really have to go look for people to fight (since chaos really only makes good money by fighting, so i'm struggling with keeping my armies afloat)

>>82831588
yoyoanon (sounded better in my head)
>what got you down?
i'm not sure, just woke up and felt like i wanted to die. I guess i have to learn to stop punishing myself.
>beats losing and not knowing why. ^^
i mean yeah, but i'm also not getting very skilled at the game cus of that.

>>82831680
hey rem
>wanna talk about it?
mainly just me liking to punish myself for perceived "unoptimized" life decisions. like i bought something for 10euro and i got actually upset at myself for doing that. not sure why, i guess i take being mindful about money to the xtreme.
>hope it feels rewarding tho
barely, watching let's plays is a lot more fun.

>>82831865
hey cat
>at least the weekend is now
yeah, i'll see what im gonna do.

>>82832442
>until we reached a point we would watch some trash mindlessly
nothing wrong with a little trash sometimes xD
>hopefully it's a good starting point
i had therapy not too long ago. Best I can say is try to be as honest as you're comfortable with. Since that was always the hardest part of all for me.

>>82832562
>firebombing entire cities and turning people into salt?
interesting thing here was the concept of Demiurge for gnostics was in part defended by this. They said OT God was actually the Demiurge, whereas Jesus was going to defeat him and prover material existence was a corruption of reality. I read a 600 page book on this topic and remember bits and pieces, but it's really weird stuff in there too
> more comforting to suspect evil
agreed. Makes it easier for people to convince they wouldn't do the same in the position of leaders, but time and time again see how quickly people can flip to that. Really things are just too big and complex for people with mediocre grades a business degree to know what to do, especially when it's easy to be lazy during the good times at big companies.
>>82832614
>i just feel there aren't many games that walk the line very well anymore.
does feel like it's one or the other. I think I always go back to it, but Bloodborne was the right amount of hard to fairness in a game for me. Helped that the atmosphere was amazing too and just worked right. Souls games in general despite the reputation for being hard were at least tolerable for me, but has to be something else that hooks me if I'll push on through
>perfect is the enemy of progress
developers will jack up everything for the user, then yell at me because my code .01 second too slow compared to their super special smart solution.

>>82832562
>crazy, but there might be something to it.
I can't believe it, and what, maybe next you're gonna say the earth isn't flat huh??
>firebombing entire cities and turning people into salt?
egyptians actually were like "uh in your book your god first hardens out pharaohs heart so that he doesn't let your people go and then gets mad and kills our innocent firstborns and turns out lake into blood because your people weren't let go which is your gods fault"
Oh and on top op that egyptians said "you didn't escape egypt we actually let you go because you were stinky and caused plagues AND your god is actually out god called set, god of the desert and violence and worst of all foreigners, and we're right because our religion is older "
And at the time there emerged a belief that a god had to be good to be a god and hewbrew god really isn't, other religions gods also weren't so that's when calling every questionable thing an allegory started
greeks did it too but that religion died out so you don't have people telling you that actually that awful think this god did is n allegory
And I don't think it's wrong to do that it's just interesting
>treat if i just physically feel worse after eating it?
ow :<
not a treat
yeah maybe let's not buy it next time then

>>82832722
>yoyoanon (sounded better in my head)
it's fine. if the name yuanon doesn't give it away, i do like stupid, low effort wordplays. ;D

>just woke up and felt like i wanted to die
isn't that just waking up? sorry for the stupid joke, hope it cheered you up a bit. i know these day just too well

>i have to learn to stop punishing myself.
harder than it sounds. we get used to treating ourselves badly.

>i'm also not getting very skilled at the game cus of that.
gotta watch some people explain the mechanics if you don't want to sit down and figure everything out for yourself. both are valid playstyles.

>>82832772
>OT God was actually the Demiurge, whereas Jesus was going to defeat him and prover material existence was a corruption of reality.
you know, when you want to throw in your lot with the bad guy, at least own it. talk about mental gymnastics. interesting story, though. hadn't heard about it before.

>I read a 600 page book on this topic
i guess it's one of those episodes a lot of people would like you to forget happened at all. luckily we have people who get really into this stuff.

>things are just too big and complex for people with mediocre grades a business degree to know what to do
especially when what is tought at universities in that regard is probably wrong. we laugh at the hogwash that has been paraded as truth in higher education through history, because we definitely got it right this time and there's no chance a huge chunk of it is completely made up nonsense with no base in reality that just sounds about right.

>it's easy to be lazy during the good times at big companies.
can't be too mad at people doing this. comfort and convenience just beat everything else.

>>82829312
i had tickets to see femtanyl when she opened for machine girl but life stuff happened :(

getting a bit sleepy

>>82832722
>i'll see what im gonna do.
come up with anything?

>>82832772
>Bloodborne was the right amount of hard to fairness in a game for me
i think i can agree with that. there was a point when someone at from decided that every enemy and their mother needed to become flailing, teleporting contortionist assholes. i played through most of elden ring, but i'm not sure i want to see where they're taking the formula next. i'm kinda fed up.

>Helped that the atmosphere was amazing too and just worked right.
definitely my favorite first playthrough and maybe my favorite setting. sadly, getting hit by surprise cosmic horror only works once, so i get why they didn't want to do a sequel. besides the shit that went down between from and sony. just one thing: fuck chalice dungeons and the fucking chalice dungeon rush spiders. there's an own circle of hell for the cunts who designed those.

>Souls games in general despite the reputation for being hard were at least tolerable
they're difficult because they tell you jack shit about the game mechanics. that's why they change them slightly with every new iteration. as soon as you know how the upgrade systems work, the games open up a lot. and you got to pay attention while navigating the areas. dark souls is still the best game in regards to level design. none of the other games managed to reach that.

>developers will jack up everything for the user, then yell at me because my code .01 second too slow compared to their super special smart solution.
we just don't get it, man.

>>82832973
>next you're gonna say the earth isn't flat huh??
of course it isn't. how could it be hollow if it was flat! >:[

>And I don't think it's wrong to do that it's just interesting
the fun thing is this stuff is still going on in certain youtube bubbles where religious people point out all the nonsense in other religions holy books to make their weird cult look better in comparison. it's the pot calling the kettle black on steriods. can be fun to watch sometimes.

>>82832973
>maybe let's not buy it next time then
yeah. sometimes i just need a reminder.

>>82833252
good night if you head to bed.

>>82832293
hey dude
>how I feel anytime i play an rts game
in the other total war games i could atleast somewhat gauge on what was going on/what to do. I'd rather actually lose than always have this chaotic retarded shit going on. serves me right for playing chaos i guess.
>Suppose that's how it usually works in real life too
sign me up to be a goddamn general then, i'd be the next patton or some shit.

>>82833105
>i do like stupid, low effort wordplays.
those are probably the only wordplays you'll get out of me anyways :P
>isn't that just waking up?
god i fucking wish it was that simple. maybe i should give therapy another chance.
>we get used to treating ourselves badly.
i guess i like to consider it self discipline, but mainly it feels like i'm taking away my own happiness.
>some people explain the mechanics
i did watch multiple playthroughs of someone doing the same campaign, they either don't explain it very well or micro like they're trying to intercept a fucking missile so i can't even see what's going on. I do understand all the unit types and formations etc, yet the battles don't make sense to me.
>>82833252
>come up with anything?
just gonna chill a bit or get drunk idfk

>>82832313
>>82832196
>doubts are hunting me now, i should not have thought alot about it
self doubt is the worst, i always try to avoid them before they end up killing me
>silly dogs ftw
they are the best

>>82832293
>spend more time shopping for these since getting older
looking at and shopping for clothes has always been fun and nice for me even if i know I'll never get them
>chicken and rice
sounds pretty tasty and very healthy !

>>82832313
>loong video :0
it is wayyy to long yea lol
>say what the video's about more or less?
basically just talks a little about each season and the general structure and changes of the show i haven't finished it yet tho
>probably also look at some short animations they're fun
animations are amazing to watch
>link
love cool short animations like that

>>82832562
>look out for the raptors
raptors? that sounds terrifying lol

>>82833342
>those are probably the only wordplays you'll get out of me anyways :P
will always get a chuckle out of me.

>i fucking wish it was that simple. maybe i should give therapy another chance.
always worth a try, but i hope you get a good therapist. it's always a gamble with those.

>mainly it feels like i'm taking away my own happiness.
i get you. whenever something nice happens, i find a way to ruin it for me. no doubt about it. i guess that's why i stopped trying.

>they either don't explain it very well or micro like they're trying to intercept a fucking missile so i can't even see what's going on.
seems a lot more hectic than the total wars i'm used to.

>I do understand all the unit types and formations etc, yet the battles don't make sense to me.
have you tried the other available factions? maybe there's more than one playstyle and chaos just isn't yours? might just be a shortcoming of the game, of course. i've never actually played or even watched a single tw:w game, so i'm just guessing at this point.

>>82833350
>it is wayyy to long yea lol
today i watched a one hour supercut of a guy playing bloodborne drunk while he also tries to explain why his star wars: outlaws review vid is taking so fucking long. long story short: he wanted to make the most comprehensive vid on why the game turned out to be such a mess, so he played the game himself on stream, made other people play it on stream, watched the streams of unrelated people, watched the media coverage and interviews and now after a lot of watching, writing, voicing and cutting, he is close to finishing his 17 hour statement on why star wars: outlaws is a bad videogame. i'm really looking forward to that one. :D

>raptors? that sounds terrifying lol
well, i don't know exactly what types of birds of prey are flying around in the area, so i decided on that word. it's the winged kind of raptors. not the scaly ones. ^^

>>82833560
>bloodborne drunk
that sounds hard, it's already such a difficult game doing it drunk sounds impossible
>why his star wars: outlaws review vid is taking so fucking long
oh what??? that's funny lol that game did come out a long time ago,
>17 hour
omg lol he's really doing a ton of research so makes sense why it's so long, crazy tho lol
>really looking forward to that one. :D
well hope you enjoy it
>it's the winged kind of raptors. not the scaly ones. ^^
okay hehe that does sound a lot more cuter

>>82833560
>it's always a gamble with those.
mainly that's why i stopped giving it a chance. everything boils down to luck
>i find a way to ruin it for me. no doubt about it. i guess that's why i stopped trying.
something like that, atleast feeling like shit is somewhat predictable and in your control. you can always make yourself feel worse, making yourself feel better is a lot harder.
>seems a lot more hectic than the total wars i'm used to.
fantasy setting lends itself to a lot more unit variety. i don't mind that since it's probably the main appeal for people to play the game if they're not warhammer fans, but it does make the whole rock paper scissors aspect to combat much more complicated.
>have you tried the other available factions?
i tried kislev, but i didn't like that one very much.
>and chaos just isn't yours?
desu the playstyle is why i chose chaos. they have no missile units so that makes microing them not a thing and they're mainly heavy infantry cav with a few monster units. i thought that was the most similar to the whole hammer and anvil aspect of medieval 2 and chose them. apparently khorne is pretty good for newbies so i might give them a try

>>82833957
>that sounds hard, it's already such a difficult game doing it drunk sounds impossible
apparently someone asked him what the point was when he felt like the game of thrones show went bad and he proceded to explain in minute detail why the first four seasons and the exact moment when it turned to shit for a few hours while fighting bloodborne bosses while completely shitfaced. later he got up, went to the toilet, came back and just ended the stream midgame without even saying goodbye to his audience. the duality of man.

>that's funny lol that game did come out a long time ago
i completely forgot it existed, which is probably what most devs of that game hoped for at this point, but he's not having any of that and will drag it out again. some people just can't be reasoned or bargained with. he just wants to make a point.

>he's really doing a ton of research so makes sense why it's so long, crazy tho lol
it's an insane amount of work for something that really doesn't deserve the attention on it's own, but the state the game released in is just a symptom of an industry wide problem i think is worth discussing, even if the game it's all about isn't.

>well hope you enjoy it
i'm sure i'll have a pretty good time with it. he did something similar with the abysmal gollum game and tried to also do it with dragon age: the veil guard, but from all the people from his group of friend only one actually was able to force himself to finish that steaming pile of videogame garbage. even he called it quits at some point.

>that does sound a lot more cuter
they do be eating other cute animalsy though. nature is rough.

>>82834149
>everything boils down to luck
i know it's hard to motivate yourself when all you can do is try as often as possible to increase the chance of hitting the jackpot, but it's all we can really do.

>>82834149
>you can always make yourself feel worse, making yourself feel better is a lot harder.
i kinda disagree, but only in the sense that to make yourself feel worse, you need to get out of your way and actively do things that are bad for you and to get better we just had to stop doing those things and replace them with nothing, but we just can't accept that and work our hardest to make us feel bad. it's crazy.

>it does make the whole rock paper scissors aspect to combat much more complicated.
i guess you just have to know which unit beats which, then.

>i tried kislev, but i didn't like that one very much.
has never been my favorite faction, either. they're just kinda there.

>apparently khorne is pretty good for newbies so i might give them a try
can't go wrong with just running at your opponent swinging two axes while screaming like a maniac. tell me how it turned out.

>>82834361
>why the first four seasons
were good

missed something here. i think that's my sign to call it a day. good night, everyone.

afternoon (american). its strange reading this thread as most of it seems like typical conversation despite the original post. strange to read through i guess but thats just me.

Do your scars ever look more or less red depending on your blood flow? Mine do, I think its kinda cool. I guess it's related to skin type.
>>82823734
>feels good ;pp
Get this man a true
But we gotta try to not do it anyway :)

>>82835541
my scars never really look red, personally