Thread 83063811

New kettle edition

Just realised I've never had sex before

Fucking wanker OP has no life and posts on here 24-7 like a loser.

>>83063823
i haven't had in sex in months. i estimate the next time i have sex will be new years eve. if not i will be sad to break a 3 year streak

Had sex around 2pm today. Whacked a glob of cum up her pussy and then played FF7. I'll be a good dad.

I think were just getting absolutely shafted for house prices over here, its just madness

me? got my anus tongued during a screening of Star Trek: First Contact.

Ever committed a crime, britfeel?
I was done once for assaulting a police officer while blackout drunk

shit edition desu

never will understand you lot's obsession with this bloke

>>83063840
It's spooky. Says it last sold for 200k which is still low for London. Now whoever bought it wants to get rid of it for 65k. Must be haunted af. There's only one picture as well. No photos of the inside...

>>83063810
It's in Lewisham, hardly central, it's in a "designated selective licensing zone" whatever that means, and it's an auction, guaranteed to go for a lot more than the listed price

How come Ruthmong won't post his flag on /int/?

SSM looked proper sad today lads, not sure if he's okay dont know if I can get a good nights kip thinking about him tonight

feel like shit, just want decent priced property

They got all the Christmas shit in the shops now. Gonna be eating bags of lebkuchen all the way til new years.

>>83063870
>Ever commited a crime?
Yeah all the time. The only one I'll admit here is riding an e-bike however. Idk how I haven't been done for this. Literally going so fast down the A1 that when I look back there's nobody there.

worried about our SSM

>>83063880
Because it's very obvious that he's from another country

>>83063896
He's been drinking all day, he's had about 8 pints. Sad fat little alcoholic mong sat in a windy wet car park playing obnoxious loud music. What a life.

>>83063877
My friend, Lewisham is zone 2. A 65k property there is shocking. Maybe you are right about the auction thing though.

for me it's whatever situation we're in where prime commercial units aren't being let out. maybe the rates drop and/or a big chain DOES try, but more often than not even they're shutting down.

gieb ground floor shop. with a bedroom upstairs. then i'll think about working.

The hoe economy is being broken in these trying times, escort prices that were 200 have had to been reduced to 100.

>>83063923
Yeah its not right though he didnt ask to born with TMAU, just hope he's back to his happy seaside self in the morning

We don't have turkey for christmas in our family. Just cook two chickens instead.

This is the cheapest three-bed i could find https://www.zoopla.co.uk/for-sale/details/71698034/?search_identifier=a43bdd74f629190bc99630c6c08730c6264dee2dafbaa7d645d69be7eb81f092
It's in a ghetto so I am not surprised.

I wonder if prozzies are seeing profits decline due to cozzie livs

In 50 years every property will be owned by blackrock

Got a chance to shag an aged out 30 year old chav lass.
Her gallery is dire, early photos and she's chav fit but now she looks like someones mum. Thinking about it tbqhwyl

>>83063954
I know its nigger central but for 60k you can have this in detroit, this shit makes me sad, id play plants vs zombies against detroit nigs for a 60k house

being racist outside of /b/ is against the rules

>>83063973
Shut up you silly daft cunt.

>>83063973
I'm black, thoughever.

>>83063973
What about being racist on /b/, then posting a screenshot of it elsewhere?

>>83063959
YOU VILL OWN NOTHING AND YOU VILL BE HAPPY

>>83063873
>you lot's
It's one sad twat. Don't lump us in with that limp dicked sad cunt.

SSM is a huge part of britfeel culture tbqh newfags show themselves when they rebel against it

>>83063959
I'd like to see them fucking try. I own every brick, every weed, every speck of dust in my crap heap.

>>83063973
Based. Report these Nazis.
>>83063985
Coconut.

>>83063959

funny how capitalists reee about communism taking away private property ownership but then when a megacorp does it through the "free market" that's fine

>>83064005

thread needs new blood let's be honest, set of sad cunts in here otherwise

>>83063944
love turkey, me. but had too many crimbo din-duns where there's also been a joint of beef for some reason. maybe some mad honey-glazed gammon just for the sake of it.

>well, there's the turkey eaten.
>back to the nice meats.

>>83064030
You know free market capitalists don't like monopolies, right? Moreover, if we actually had a free market then it literally wouldn't be possible or matter theoretically if one company 'bought all the houses'.

>>83064006
YOU
VILL
OWN
NOTHING.

A nazi, round here, hanging around with facistsm, in this day and age? What is he, a fucking lefty?
Zeig uwu mein nibba

i'm quite random outside /b/ sometimes. you never know what i'll do next.

In 2025 you could have Jack the fucking Ripper caught on video, bloody knife still in hand, standing over the body of a dead woman and in the video of him being apprehended you'd still hear some idiot bint screaming in the background "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! OH MY GOD!! LEAVE HIM ALONE!".

for me it's the Bombing of Dresden. makes us the real Nazis, same way Idi Amin was a bit of a racist.

What are you having on your cheese board this Christmas, britfeel?
A posh cheddar
Brie
Cambazola
Double gloucester
Wendleydale
St Agur
Boursin
Stilton
Smoked cheese
Some others that I can't recall

>>83064049

They only SAY they don't like monopolies when it's somebody else holding the monopoly. Same deal for the "free market" itself, that's why I put it in sarcasm quotes. They love a market rigged in their favour.

There's no such thing as an intellectually honest, good faith capitalist.

>>83064058
I'm politically incorrect in the IRL.

>>83064084
>There's no such thing as an intellectually honest, good faith capitalist.
Of course there are, is it so hard to imagine people actually believe in things, or is this some kind of projection because all your belief is performative and you hold no real values of any kind deep down?

>>83064072
No you wouldn't lad. If you stopped making up these fantasies that upset you then you'd feel a lot better

rent in the soviet union was 6% of a worker's income. and that's the worst possible example of communism.

rent in the uk today is 50-60% of a worker's income. you cannot defend it. our economic system is shit.

>>83064072
I hate that shit so much. What is wrong with people?

>>83064049
look up Rockefeller standard oil

>>83064072
not my place to determine guilt, is it? a nonce could have a child in one hand and a signed confession in the other. best i can do is remind him not to accept the duty solicitor.

>>83064090

No, it's perfectly possible to imagine them. But that's just the problem. They are imaginary. They are not the people with money or power in current year, and thus, they are not the ones setting the rules of the game we are currently playing.

>>83064082
normal mature cheddar
Mexicana
then about eight different cured meats

Mumberg is enforcing a strict no drink or drugs policy this Christmas. Which is shit. Can't get drunk as fuck and snort cheeky lines of coke in the back garden with my junkie older sister.

>>83064121
>They are not the people with money or power in current year
...well, yes, I agree. We do not live in a free market capitalist country that is run by free market capitalists. We live in a socialist defacto centrally planned shithole. What's your point?

editormong evening melty time it seems

Got to have a bit of snow on Christmas haven't you

>>83064132
Your parents must be so proud of you two. Fucking up the holidays so much that they actually have to set a rule where you're not allowed to get fucked on drugs at Christmas. Most people don't have to be told not to do this, lad. You should sort your life out and apologise for ruining family get togethers.

Pollers shitting up another thread with the same boring lolbert shite already then

>>83064133
>...well, yes, I agree. We do not live in a free market capitalist country that is run by free market capitalists.

Correct

>We live in a socialist defacto centrally planned shithole.

you live in a parallel dimension where down is up and left is right

I honestly think that infidelity should be a jailable offence

>>83064149
I don't see the problem, lad. Not like I'm doing it in front of children. We're all adults. It's not like mumberg didn't drink as well.

>mum had a glass of wine with christmas dinner, why is she getting upset that me and my sister snort lines of coke in the garden and turn into cunts for the rest of the evening?
If you don't understand why your mum might not like this then I can't help you. Poor woman.

>>83064073
they bombed us first though didn't they? that's why they had to move all the kids out of london

>>83064107
We have socialists running the country (into the ground) now. Over the last almost 30 years, we've had 2 socialist governments (labour who are connected to the fabian society who are socialists) and 2 conservative governments.
Socialism is used to move a society towards communism. Communists (not in government) claim they want a stateless society, but that will never happen. They're expecting everyone to be nice to each other, in some kind of hippie commune or something? Plus most commies now just want the free life, everyone doing things for them, while they put in 0 effort.
There will never be a commie utopia, because it will be full of commies.

Communism is when ugly deformed freaks make it illegal to be normal then rob and/or kill all successful people out of petty resentment and cruelty.

Glad I live up north where houses are cheap

pseudointellectual idiots are way worse than normal idiots, you can have a laugh with them

>>83064235
Swings and roundabouts. Most Northern towns are absolute shitholes, even more than Southern ones are. Also lack of good paying jobs means that of course house prices are lower.

>>83064208
if you ask me, this Reform lot are just another group of crypto-communists. probably all neo-Bolsheviks set up by deep state thinktanks.

>>83064208

We haven't had a socialist government since the 70s. Blair/Brown and Starmer's Labour is fully neoliberal. We sold all the council houses. We sold the utility companies. We even sold the fucking Royal Mail and you think we still have anything resembling a socialist state? You really have to be thick, lad.

What's more important than that, however, is that our system is based on collusion and corruption by business and financial interests who rig the game in their favour. We don't have a free market, we have a system run by the old boy's club of Oxbridge mates who hand contracts to their pals while their friends in the media cover it all up for them.

Wake up lad.

Did he think he was being witty or something? That post just falls remarkably flat.

>>83064049
Cool, then what do they intend to do about it? because every time someone proposes state intervention to break up monopolies lolbergtarians start to reee that it's a violation of the NAP or whatever the fuck they like to whine about

>>83064246
"Never argue with an idiot. They will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience."- mark twain

God I hate you all

computer games used to be fifty quid but fifty quid was less money back then.

>>83064246
If you think the current government is not socialist I cannot help you lad.

>>83064260

Argument is not for the benefit of the idiot, but the more intellectually capable souls who are reading from the sidelines.

>>83064262
what did i do lad?!

>>83064269

If you think the current government is socialist, then you simply do not know what that word means, frankly.

cooorrrr ticking a lot off the old bingo card tonight lads!

>>83064269
he's right though lad. Even the US wouldn't privatize their postal service.

>>83064289
is that a reference to somthing

This is that same mong who thinks Singapore is a modern example of a nightwatchman state kek

>>83064294
exactly this, if even America wouldn't do something then you know you shagged it

Then again America was literally handing out free money during the coof, bit commie of them that wasn't it, maybe the poltards are right, Trump is a bolshevik

Wish I was in america so I could vote for the guy that worked on Halo

>>83064312
i wish i was american so i could buy a gun and blow my head off

>>83064246
Actually, with more than half of the current cabinet being fabians, I'd say we do have a socialist government. Only 1/3 of labour MP's are fabians, yet labour are linked to the fabian society. They are made up of socialist democrats, democratic socialists (sounds somewhat similar but ok) and trade unionists. The labour party was formed from the old socialist parties.
Have a look for yourself, google these 2 questions, and 1 term.
How many of the current government are fabians?
How many MP's in labour?
Labour party.
Fuck it, I'll help you with 1 of them.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Labour_Party_(UK)
>>83064260
Similar could be said about siding with idiots.

How many clients do escorts see per week you reckon?

Tim Davie has resigned as BBC director general following the revelation that the BBC edited a Trump speech to make it seem like Trump explicitly endorsed the January 6th Capitol Hill riots.

He had a long a storied career as director general covering up for paedophiles, hiring paedophiles and generally running a very paedophiles friendly ship. Various paedophiles he worked with said they will miss him.

it's probably a good idea we don't have guns here innit

Like you know the average yank is a psycho but their mass shooters only kill a handful of people cos they're wimps. If Brits had mass shooters it'd be a bloodbath, like having SAS commandos just go rogue and wipe out whole villages

We're just too hard

>>83064351
We do have guns here. It's just a lot harder to obtain 1 legally.

>>83064348
Just resign and move on with no repercussions.
Who else does this? Ah yeah, politicians, another bunch of deceptive cunts like the journihilists.

Having a bowl of Coco Puffs. Corrrr

>>83064344
Gotta have a fanny rest day + spend their money but probably about 3-5 people a day.
Probably no real limit, depends how much cash they want.

>>83064369
Kind of mental how you can basically just fucking torpedo an institution/department/entire fucking country and then just swan off into the sunset with your defined benefits pension. We need a purge, like an actual purge where politicians who destroy the country are dragged in front of courts and given summary judgments.

Most escorting is just handjobs and blowjobs anyway, so you don't get your fanny blown out all that much. Also, come on lets be real, the average guy seeing an escort is not some chad with an 8 inch coke-can thickness rod that can fuck for hours. I'm sure it's honestly not that rough on your pussy when you're in the business.

>>83064340

You would be better off looking at who makes the biggest financial contributions to the Labour party mate. Hint: It's not trade unions or hippie communes any more. It's very rich business people. Why are these wealthy business folk funding a communist dictatorship?

hotgirl from my workplace was an escort, at least for a month or something, I remember browsing adultwork and seeing her profile, she put her hand in front of her face on the pic but you could tell it was her.
Said something like "New to escorting, but always intrigued me", didn't bother messaging her, just thought it was quite funny. Her profile was up for like a month then I saw her back on tinder and her adultwork profile deleted.
Havent seen her back on AW since.

>>83064348
>the BBC edited a Trump speech to make it seem like Trump explicitly endorsed the January 6th Capitol Hill riots.

corrr is there just a straight-up comparison of the footage, lad?

he says all sorts of daft things, but i don't like when editing for brevity becomes something else entirely. mumble some naive idea about bleach killing viruses, could THAT be an option, somehow...? and suddenly 'the US President is suggesting people inject bleach.'

>>83064405
Untrue I've got a big thick cock and I use AW all the time, 30 minutes is minimum a blowjob/fucking and to be honest they always stay over time with me so I'm cumming. Only time someone didn't stay overtime was a clock watching romanian.

>>83064369
>>83064392

same with chief executives

like that's literally the only job of a CEO, just if your company gets into shit for something you are the fall guy

>>83064392
I 100% agree. Prison sentences, fines that will put a dent in their bank accounts, banned from entering politics again. If we ever want to see that, we'll have to force it to happen. Leaving these deceitful types to police themselves, will only lead to more harm being done.
>>83064407
Because it is a politician, they are for sale to the highest bidder. They have no morals or scruples.

>>83064437
>They have no morals or scruples.

I thought they were committed socialists?

>>83064392
love or hate the BBC it IS a public institution but it doesn't feel publicly accountable.

there must be some Citizen Kane type arc these people end up on. as a youth starting out at the Beeb, surely you believe in it? then it becomes just another job, your principles gradually fall by the wayside.

If Britain were really a communist dictatorship then unions would be legally prohibited from striking, dossers would be forced to get a job or sent to a gulag and immigration would be close to zero

>>83064441
No, you're almost right, they are sociopaths that should be committed.

>>83064443

These people come from a specific class bred exclusively to fill this role.

Was listening to a chap on the radio today, he was saying how his first job out of uni, his first job, not even having to flip burgers or stand on a till even once, was being sent to Africa to report on some genocide shit for the BBC. Mummy and Daddy were the right people and sent him to the right school and he was pretty much just waved through the door. No normal council estate lad can just walk in the beeb can they.

this is the same stock as politicians and high up banksters come from. they see it as their right, their god given birth privilege, to rule over us.

>>83064453
if you lived under communism and you stole something from work would you be arrested?, i mean it technically already belonged to you didnt it?

>>83064132
wish I had a sibling, always wanted one and felt as though I should have one, fink its not rite to have 1 child, its like goldfish, got to have 2.

under communism, nobody would be fat, and women would want to have sex with you.

>>83064489

you would not feel the need to steal because you would already be enjoying the fruits of your labour comrade

but if you did you'd get double executed and your family name erased from history

Gommunism

>>83064523
mental how this is literally happening in new york rn
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=46XoD6RjkjY

>>83064520
>you would already be enjoying the fruits of your labour
> fruits of your labour
hope its bananas, luv em

>>83064546

They wouldn't be as curvy as good proper capitalist latin american slavery bananas though

Right, so that's politics sorted, now what? The financial crisis. Give everyone more money (it's fake and gay, so printing more means nothing).
Bosch, r cuntree fixed.
Phew, just in time for work tomorrow, don't panic wagies, world issues are getting sorted.

Actual Escortlad here
remember on Thursday 6th I sent her a message asking if she was available? she has read that message now, but I've had no reply, which I guess makes sense as the date has gone.

What should I do about the earlier message I sent asking about the 12th? wait until the evening of Tuesday 11th to follow up?

imagine having proper family n that, like a large one that you interact with, cousins, aunties, uncles, nephews, grandparents, cor then imagine having mates on top of that, youd just be proper socially fulfilled wouldn't you

Just to mention also I'm still in the tent and haven't seen any sign of her as of yet.

Do you think she's in trouble and should I actually knock on the door?

>>83064559
Give it a rest now lad. Nobody cares

>>83064566
i somewhat have the first but not so much the second

>>83064559
Are these holes for hire all like this, or just this one?
Send her some pics of escorts in here area and ask her if she knows if they are any good.

>>83064573
i'm asking for advice lad, give me some help ffs

>>83064566

Sounds like a right ballache honestly. What if I just want to stay at home and wank all day

>>83064614
Same answer lad. Leave the poor sex trafficking victim alone

>>83064614
Not him but, why change your posting style?

>>83064578
I've got the second but not the first. Funny how that works.

>>83064665
what posting style?

>>83064246
Idk why people are arguing with you. You're right. Even the USA still has state-owned mail

>>83064680
1 post is grammatically correct, others aren't. That's what I mean.

Me? Cooking 4 (four) chicken breasts because the best before date is tomorrow

>>83064559
I guess she didn't like you.
>>83064614
I already gave you advice, just move on and stop simping for an escort
t.Escort.

>>83064711

So what am I supposed to do with these plane tickets to Slovakia and the tent then?

>>83064704

Best before dates are made up lad, you can easy go 2-3 days over. It's just yet more crony corruption by the jewish lizard mason elites to make you throw away good food.

Under communism food would never go bad and escorts would be free

>>83064738
Sure but then I don't have an excuse to eat copious amounts of chicken

>>83064566
It's knackering. Being in one of these is tiring lad.
>5 group chats. "Brother Chat", "Cousin Chat", "Family Chat", "Wifes spouses chat", "Mates Chat" and they're always talking, constantly, if you don't participate bad things happen
>Bad Things Include
>Getting the piss taken out of you
>People talking shit to your half of the family saying you're a recluse
>The dreaded "Pop-In"
>Chats are normally benign "Have you lads any idea on X", politics, family squabbles, picture sharing, memes and party/gathering planning
There hasn't been a single fucking weekend this year where I've been left to my own devices. Yesterday I was at my 17 year old nieces birthday party. One of her university friends was creepy as fuck and started petting my hair as she sat next to me at the dinner table asking what I did at uni and if I'd ever been to Scotland, when I told her I was in my 30s and what she was doing was uncomfortable as I was almost old enough to be her dad she made a huge deal about how young I looked and how soft my hair was and asked how I have so few wrinkles and felt my face.

She asked for my number and she asked what my twitter was, I told her I'm on LinkedIn and she called me old. No shit I'm old, fuck off slag.

FYI it's avoiding stress and junk food.

>>83064711
Tranny escorts don't count desu

under communism, you could cook the 4 (four) chicken breasts and gradually distribute them to yourself in smaller portions.

>>83064775
Under communism I would have 0 (zero) chicken breasts

>>83063823
Finally lost my v-card a few months ago and then the girl I lost it to killed herself
Gotta love a good joke setup like that

Escort here, I'm fine and I don't need any help but thank you for being concerned Anon. Also I didn't reply because I've got a job at Tesco and I am no longer taking cock for money sorry. Good luck with the rest of your life.

I have seized the means of mass consumption

>>83064730
Uhm i don't know what you were planning but it doesn't sound legal.
>>83064770
Why not? I'm in the same business. Even advertise on the exact same site that he messaged her on.

Under communism, chicks would have big breasts.

>>83064769
oh dear that sounds so terrible, not a slag coming onto you and a large vibrant family that love you how awful, well i'll count myself lucky that I have absolutely none of that and I haven't communicated with a relative in nearly 2 decades, will be having 0 family christmas din dins and no slags.

Do you think Putin will restore Marxism-Leninism once he defeats Europe?

>>83064834

No, the Chinks will have him assassinated once he has served his purpose

>>83064808
Das a funny looking chicken.

Fucking based

https://old.reddit.com/r/unitedkingdom/comments/1osdso6/inquiry_to_review_rise_in_young_people_not/nnwpfe5/

The wagies are waking up.

Lads i found an old tape measure. Shall I measure my cock? Havn't done it since I was 13

>>83064792
>I've got a job at Tesco and I am no longer taking cock for money sorry
A freebie? Ok, what time does your shift finish, also will you grab me a meal deal, I get quite hungry after sex.

>>83064866

Yeah go on, give us the full dimensions. Length and circumference.

>>83064827
Lad I just want to be left alone. In my 20s I took out a rather large loan That I defaulted on because I knew I wouldn't be buying a house until well into my 30s at which point the default would fall off my credit profile. and travelled China and Mongolia with nothing but a backpack and a tourist visa. I was out there for an entire year. It was bliss. I walked everywhere well into the countryside, along roads, followed beaches and coastlines just barely guided by google maps on my phone that I had to keep turning off and on to save power and a USB power bank just in case I ran into trouble. Slept under the stars for days on end. I think my longest streak was 9 days before I absolutely needed a place to do my laundry and take a shower and bath because the local streams were gross. When I absolutely needed to I stayed in 5 star hotels that were cheaper than even the shittiest premier inn over here.

I want to go back. I'd go weeks without talking to anyone and even when I did the language barrier made only the most necessary conversations possible.

>>83064289
Sunday night is normally a frantic night you can do more than one card

>>83064865
"Kid has been diagnosed with autism, bingo"
Is an autism diagnosis really the golden ticket? Lot of people saying this.

>>83064946
>In my 20s I took out a rather large loan That I defaulted on

based, I bought a car for 15 grand and only paid about 3k in the end lmao

gotta play the jew at their own game innit

>>83064970
Autism pays for my zone 2 flat.

right then big glass of orange juice then bed for me, night lads x

>>83064914
quite suprised. 8 inches at full mast. vary between 6 inch and 5.5 circumference as you travel along the old boy

Anyway back to watching gone fishing on iplayer

Have you ever felt depressed by your success?

https://old.reddit.com/r/unitedkingdom/comments/1osdso6/inquiry_to_review_rise_in_young_people_not/nnwqk32/

Meanwhile I do better just by being a NEET. I'm not even smug about this. It's honestly fucked up. Unfortunately the popular solution seems to be to make benefits harder instead of paying people decently.

The stock market is another one. I threw 500 quid on a company and made 80 in a week. Did fuck all yet if I had put in 5000 I'd have made a wage. Showed me how rigged the game really is.

>>83065023
Nighty night lad, hope you have a good sleep.

Redistributed 2 chicken breasts into my tummy

Visiting the psychiatrist on the 22nd should I tell him during one of my depressive phases I was convinced that I had to kill myself. Is this a good idea or not. Or should I keep it to myself.

My plans for the week? Not much, physio home appointment tomorrow, then that's it. Rushed off mi feet. Neurologist the week after, glaucoma stuff at the end of the month. Hopefully starting pilates (sit down) with the local MS massif, after the neurology appointment.
Think I upset a neighbour earlier, he was telling me "get on PIP, my aunty told them she has anxiety and depression and gets 1800 a month" I said I've tried, but I was honest, so got nowhere. Don't think he was happy, but fugg it.
Trying again after I've seen the neurologist, expecting to be turned down again.

>>83065147
Hope things work out for you lad. I think you've got it a lot worse than most of us here.

>>83065147
>I was honest
You're stupid lad. It's really simple, tell them what they want to hear and you get money. Then again there is literally fuck all wrong with you, you don't have MS, you don't have glaucoma, you're just a lazy malingering dosser

Well I've done it now, friendly dnm vendor doing samples and it turns out my monero change has gone up in the last month. 1g of k and .2 of coke shall be winging their way to me this week. I've been good for a long time, I deserve it.

>>83065164
I dunno, I've got family that help me. There's some anons that don't have anyone to help. But thanks.
>>83065175
Could you tell that to my body please, as it's under the impression that all of this is real.

>>83065047
>just start your own cyber security business bro
kek

>>83065195
From what I recall of your incessant ramblings you literally don't have MS, as in you haven't actually been diagnosed

>Be me
>Sad loser living in my mum's attic browsing the internet or playing video games all day long
>Fat and depressed, no friends or prospects of starting a family
>Look up jobs in the British Army
>Various positions from engineering to electronics and even IT jobs that don't require any qualifications, they will train you as long as you promise to work with them for a while afterwards
>Qualifications can be used in the civvie world to propel you to high paying successful jobs once you're done in the Army
>Meet tons of cool people from all walks of life, they know I'm a bit shy and spergy but overlook that and take me under their wings and help me thrive
>Get fit, educated and meet girlfriend on base, no longer a loser and feel ready for successful adult life
>She's pregnant and we're getting a deposit on a three bedroom semi
>Feels good man
Join the army today lads, it changed my life and can change yours as well!
It's never too late!

>>83065265
Damn you know recruitment has fallen off when they start a campaign on /britfeel/

>>83065215
It's not my fault you have memory issues. I have a MS diagnosis, and I'm waiting to find out which type, as there are 3 types of MS, RRMS where symptoms appear, then either go away immediately, or go away after some time, secondary progressive MS, which is what happens to some after RRMS the symptoms being constant, and there's primary progressive MS (my suspected type) where symptoms appear then steadily get worse, no days without symptoms.
You're just a cunt, I don't know why, but it's clear you are 1. I hope things improve for you lad.

WET MANS THROAT LIKE HE'S DRINKING

THEY LOVE ME IN TOTTENHAM LIKE CHICK KING

>>83065287
You're full of shit pal. Just a malingering dosser. Fuck all wrong with you. Get a job.

>>83065215
Sorry, I forgot to say I'm waiting on this final confirmation so I can find out what treatments are available to me. Then when I know, I'll decide whether I'll be taking it (there's only 1 for PPMS). I'm 60/40 at the moment (as to not taking anything), it won't fix me, and maybe gods will be done eh, might be my time to shuffle off this mortal coil.
I got a job, a blowie from yer mum this morning. Wahey.

GAS GANG

THE LITTLE FASSYHOLE IS DEAD

SHOOTIN UP THE BLOCK

GB IN A CASKET

FORENSICS SETTING UP TENTS

just by turning up to your PIP assessments, that proves you can go to them.

>>83065434
That statement makes 0 sense.

film's over Peter Jackson, no need to have 30 minutes of stuff happening still.

THESE NIGGAS SO PHONEY THOUGH

THEY ACTING LIKE YOUR HOMIE THOUGH

>>83065442
say you were an assessor for Asos, and you needed proof someone was capable of turning up to a PIP assessment.
them showing up to one is pretty watertight.

NOBODY GIVES A DAMN THAT SAMWISE GAMGEE GETS MARRIED
WHAT THE *FLYING FUCK* HAPPENED TO SARUMAN, THEATRICAL EDITION???

>>83065466
What are you on about? You're crazy, ket lad.

>>83065466
The irony is that it incentivises people to stay as disabled as possible, ensuring they never leave PIP.

>>83065483
Bet you wish you watched the Extended Editions now eh.

>>83065483
FUCK A WITCH KING

ON A FAG THING

>>83065486
it's like putting 'can you read this?' on a form.

>You're crazy, ket lad.
are you willing to put this in writing?

Just got back from seeing that Predator Badlands and honestly I enjoyed it. It's nothing like any of the other Predator films but it's fun just try not to take it too serious. In beddingtons now, ate and drank too much (I had a large wizza before the film then got nachos at the cinema) so feel tuckered out now. Garn watch Predator 2 then sleeps.

>>83065501
i kinda do, yeah ;_; but tbqh i'm glad there there for a rewatch.
the one time i watched them i remember a few scenes feeling like filler, the way DVDs were in the early days.

>>83065525
SHE IS NO MAN
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xMVTKOoy1uk

>>83064073
lol read this in voice of mark from peep show

>>83065528
>are you willing to put this in writing?
I started to, but then felt bad for writing it out, seems more real doing it in the IRL. Sorry.

>>83065553
>taking a predator film seriously

kek

>>83065564
CREEP UP ON MORDOR

SHOOT THEM UP

"Shit happens."
- wise Yautja's noble saying

don't give Sam the Red Book of Westmarch you tit. you just know he's edited half of this shit to make himself look better.

Should I upgrade my e-bike to 72V yay or nay? Currently getting 30mph on 52V

>>83065632
captain there has been a mordor

This is my e-bike

>>83065736
>Should I upgrade my e-bike to 72V yay or nay? Currently getting 30mph on 52V
What speed would the upgrade give, 45mph ish?

>>83065466
Apparently when you go to these in person assessments they have cameras in the room and the assessor watches you for a few mins to judge you to see how you came in, if you needed any assistance or if you sat in a certain chair with arm rests.

>>83065789
My calculations say 38-40 mph. I don't mind 30 mph but I can be doing 30 in a 20 and cagies are still trying to overtake me.

Snack time lads.

As a long time high-power e-bike rider this is my take on the media reporting on e-bikes

It's complete bullshit. They raise a wheel in the air, turn the throttle and claim a 48V DIY bike can do 50 mph. There are people doing 50mph but it is extremely rare. The reason is that it is very expensive. You need to replace the battery, controller, everything with 1k+ worth of high-end parts. Most don't have the money or the knowledge to do this. Even my 30mph 52V bike I rarely see any other electric bike overtake me.

I want to say they should just legalise e-bikes up to 30mph but the truth is that most people are morons. I am one of the only people who ride in a helmet and hi-vis and stop at the lights. There should be a licence and numberplate but no insurance or tax to incentivise them. Else why would anyone bother with a one-horsepower vehicle with no roof?

we need the lad who did this to post more vocaroos
https://vocaroo.com/17z06wVtEMLt

crossy the MILFslayer x

>>83065961
Not him, just a fan. I got mashed on a pregab the other night, and had this on repeat for about an hour while sat in the dark.
I love it, desu.

>it's NOT a retcon!

did Bilbo's printer also run out of red ink whenever they wouldn't let you have red in the original illustrations?

Damn, I just heard about this guy a few wmonths ago. I was watching old top gear on youtube. R.I.P

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c2lpww7pw72o

I heard he was dodgy, is this true?

>>83065961
corrr this is quality, very talented lad.

how do i know this song from Life is Strange or Garden State or something, if it was released in 2024?

>>83065265
shalom

fdserwewr

>>83065839
Are you just wanting it to go faster than cars in some areas?

it midnight. time to choonpost
nocturnal vibes
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=va4OyeQHbr8

>>83066089
>shalom
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3mfHWmchg_I

Wanted to play Baldurs Gate 3 but after seeing the price (50 fucking quid and can't be arsed pirating it because for some reason its 10 million gb) I'd need it to be worth it and don't think I can be fucked with a huge RPG.

Want something easy to play where I can turn my brain off and jump in and out quickly and don't think BG3 is it. Any suggestions?

Corrrrr! Finally ordered that Small Soldiers Blu-ray. My favourite as a kid, surprised it took me so long. Had a huge crush on Kirsten Dunst did I not?

>>83066164
May I interest you in Diablo 2: Resurrected my friend? Perfect for jumping in and out and has an extremely satisfying loop.

new york cares. britfeel
prime nightwalk material
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GS74Pu_ttN8

>>83066164
Peglin. wot if Peggle had a baby with Slay the Spire.

THE PAST INSIDE THE PRESENT.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n0P1JsMTWc0

nightwalk in a secluded space
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RIajxtdRhEA

>>83066183
Don't like ARPGs.

>>83066202
Already played it lad. Love a good roguelike. I'm looking forward to RACCOIN: Coin Pusher and Slay the Spire 2. I tried CloverPit a week ago but didn't like it.

>>83066141
Yes. I believe that at 40mph it won't be worth trying to overtake me and losing their licence.

triple sonsssssss
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WQf2m14qWis

>you will never be a corporate MILF's boytoy

How do you deal with this feel?

oh aye x
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g_Ko_7m0IWs

>>83066274
If that's the case, I'd say go for the upgrade anon, might as well.
Do you wear a helmet?

>>83066170
corrr rewatched it a few months ago. quite the kino.

played multiplayer on this game loads. watching some videos, the levels are so empty goddamn. when i was 8 they were these complex, mysterious arenas.

>>83066314
I wear a motorcycle helmet.

>>83066347
Good lad, safety first.

Every time I see a post about a stranger being kind to a Redditor I check their post history and they are almost always a woman. This is depressing.

Felt liek making a post byt I dont have anything to say in particular n_n x

>>83066357
kind to a Redditor how?

tbqh sorting shit for people online is one of those stupid things i'd do if i was rich.

>>83066431
>Felt liek making a post byt I dont have anything to say in particular
It do be like that at times lad. Hope you're doing well.

>>83066431
we all hollowposting in life

watching a longplay of this now and fucking hell every last sound is burned into my brain

Na nite Ziggeh, see you in the morning pal

>>83066488
Thanx friend you too x

Not actually bothered that nobody will ever love me anymore. I don't even like other people's company, they always end up fucking me over eventually. You might be thinking of 'The Fox and the Grapes' but it's genuinely how I feel.

>>83066498
Wym hollowposting.dark souls,?

>>83066758
just void of substance innit.
was gonna say 'emptyposting' but that makes it sound like a literally blank post and that would NOT fly on /r9k/.

>>83066431
mammy said anything abt the social club dances?

>>83066752
Can anyone actually really love you? The only possible love that seems to be truly unconditional comes from your parents and a lot of people don't even have that. All other forms of 'love' will always be conditional.

>'realistic' + pkmn name in DeviantArt
>that frog when

>>83066773
No thoughts head empty x

omd Little Witch in the Woods just came out? it's done? i thought it was one of those forever-WIP games.

kinda wonder if AI will just be the end of hand-crafted pixel art. not sure if i can 'trust' graphics going forward since it CAN just do spritesheets/tilesets on par with a pretty SNES game.

>>83066812
Nah she went shopping afternoon n then fell asleep about 3pm lol

>>83066882
O....I want to play it, Good reviews on steam.Hope that haunted choccylatier come out in this decade aswell. The last farm game i ws hopeful would be a good 1 was Kynseed but it flopped.

this isn't AI, but it COULD be AI. no evidence i'm not lying to you (some BagrashPixels fella but what if HE'S lying)

>>83066934
>haunted choccylatier
it looks good so far, i hope the Stardew bloke has a good handle on making it fun.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TIKSGazNOqg
oh my days we're off to Habbo Hogwarts

>>83067015
>it COULD be AI
Me when am listening ambient music on youtube n the channel was made after 2022

>>83063811 (OP)
why do brits use these huge mega kettles instead of gooseneck kettles
literally all you can do with this fuckass type is splash
if you just want high volume buy once cry once with a japanese tank heater

Fucks sake lads
Fell asleep at 10pm intending to sleep the whole night and I've woken up at 2am worrying about stuff

>>83067105
milk and sugar?

>>83067092
crossy i don't want to alarm you but i've heard nightcore is just music sped + pitched up a bit

>>83067105
the fuck is this problem you're having?

i've never had a kettle more than 2 litres. no need for some fancy spout you just do this:
>pour from top into destination
>water arrives there

it's not like tipping from a cup or something, it has a lip.

>>83066752
Same lad. After 30 years I'm stuck in my routine now. Couldn't be doing with all that relationship stuff.

Lads I'm starting to panic that the escort I saw isn't gonna reply. I've got work tomorrow and I've woken up feeling anxious.

I sent three messages across the space of four days last week that haven't been responded to.

Originally, I emailed on Sunday 2nd asking if she was free on Friday 7th. She said no but that she'd like to see me after the 10th when she got back.

The first reply after that was me saying "we'll catch up after the 10th". I sent that on Sunday 2nd. She read that on Tuesday 4th. No reply which is fair since I didn't ask for a date.

The second was me then (on Monday 3rd) suggesting Wednesday 12th as a meeting date. She read that on Tuesday 4th, no response.

Then last Thursday 6th, I messaged her asking if she was free later that evening. She only read that a few hours ago.

Please give me some advice here. Right now, I'm thinking to wait until around 6pm tonight, then send her another message asking her to please let me know. But I don't want to be too pushy. I don't get it because all previous communication has been good.

I'm begging for help here, I need to get to sleep for work but I can't. What's the best way to approach this? I don't know who else to ask.

Currently nomming Sensations Mango & Chilli Chutney Poppadoms, Haribo Tangfastics, and Fox's Half Coated Milk Chocolate Cookies while watching YouTube

What? Don't I have work in the morning? No lad I have never slaved for the capitalist machine in my life and never will :)

>>83067737
go to bed lad. give it until 6pm like you say, then resume panicking.

in fact, for every single minute thing your OCD brain keeps fixating on, give it until 6pm the next day. over and over. i advise doing this for the next 50+ years, see how you get on.

>>83067792
Yeah funny but that doesn't answer my question about how I should interact with her.

>>83067737
Not sure why you are fixated on an escort but it sounds like you need to move on. Making your mental stability dependent on the whims of a woman is stupid in general but especially with a fucking paid actor. You seem autistic from the way you are writing so I have some sympathy but you need to immediately block her, go through the withdrawals and get over it.

>>83067737
Maybe she's too busy with work to reply.

>>83067811
I want to lose my virginity to her, as pathetic as it sounds.

>>83067814
She was away for a few days.

>>83067836
Maybe she doesn't like you or thinks you're ugly. It happens, move on. Plenty of fish in the sea.

Mornin' lid.
I'm here to take you to the Helper Shelter for your wolunteering work as mandated by the Jobcentre.
I got a pair of ear defenders for you de lid. You'll be working in the Seether wing. They've been quite worked up past week de lid, they're screaming at everyone. Oh and here's your bite proof gloves, you'll be needing them as well. Seethers have teeth like a row of burnt fence posts, nasty infections if they nip you. Don't let them corner you in the pens either.
Packed you a brekkie of milky bars and tangfastics, you won't have time to eat till we let you go at three in the afternoon. Off to the car de lid.

>>83067958
Me? I'll never work. Not even for free.

my goal in life: nutting into a fanny

>>83068083
you need an achievable goal lad

>>83068099
whats your goal in life

>>83068105
be a retard and get drunk

>>83068105
thats an achievable goal

>>83068111
thats an achievable goal desu

>>83068123
exactly
i never fail

need to poo urgently but the staff is currently cleaning the toilets

took about 4 days back to remind meyself why i left in first place

attracts all the freaks
hhl is alri
ruthmong annoying but hes alri too
but then get weirdos like xtal poster and others

>>83067791
corr got some of em in cupboard

may hafta break it open sharpish

>>83068161
Dont talk shit about crossy

>>83068196
crossy/footmong are awful.

>>83067866
She left me a review saying I was nice and she said I had beautiful eyes during the meet.

I went back to sleep then, woke up with an erection just now. Positive sign!