I have tremendous difficulty accepting that something I did got my little sister murdered.
I taught her all about gun safety. Taught her to respect people. Taught her that there’s something good in everyone. That you just need to put yourself in their shoes.
At the gun range she made a mistake and dragged the barrel across a crowd, and I flipped out on her. She had never done something that retarded before in her life. It made her cry with rage.
Well, a few years ago, but soon after that event she got robbed and hesitated pulling the trigger. It got her killed. They murdered her. Is it my fault? Did me admonishing her get her smoked?
Guilt. That’s the word I’m thinking. It makes me sick to my stomach, man. I don’t know what to think here.

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Everybody is constantly telling me that I light up the room. That I get along with everyone. That when they think of a philanthropic angel I am who comes to mind.
Well… i am not so sure. How could I test the things people say? I wanna know if I am good.

She’s dead lol

Man this board is ded, and not coming back ever.