UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU NOOOOO MIMIC STOP BANGING MY COMRADES DEAD BODIES UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

>be me, tangle's lovely neurodivergent lesbian girlfriend
>in Mcdonalds for the care bears toy promotion
>get tangle to order me 10 Happy Meals
>she looks at the ground and sheepishly says "But whisper, you're getting a little heavy. Maybe you should only have 6 Happy Meals."
>stand on her feet and refuse to move until she complies with my order
>she cannot move and almost falls as she tries to pull her feet out from under mine
>the lemur bitch begins to cry as she realizes I have trapped her, checkmate whore
>tangle quietly agrees that big girls need ten Happy Meals and she goes to pay for the food
>while she is ordering I get on my hands and knees, she hands the packages of food to me
>I grab the bags with my mouth and begin walking on all fours to the play area
>I slowly crawl up the slide, barely fitting whilst letting out enormous amounts of gas
>once I'm inside the main play area my flatulence has become to over powering that it even brought a tear to my eye
>the children playing inside begin to run out, complaining of the putrid smell
>I yell "uuuu patriarchal heteronormative fascism has infected the youth uuu"
>I sit in the center of the play gym and begin to have a picnic with my happy meals
>I give each care bear a bit of cheeseburger
>I'm setting up an awesome play story with my bears when that cunt tangle and the mcdonalds manager come into the play area
>"Ma'am we have been getting complaints about an adult in the play area. You must be under 8 years old to use it."
>tell him to fuck off
>mcdonalds employees begin entering the play structure
>push my back against the wall and start kicking them as they come towards me
>all of the weight of the invasion plus my 300lb-self breaks the play structure
>I fall through to the ball pit, the entire structure collapses
>as the customers try to save a boy trapped under the structure, we escape
>tangle begins crying in the van
>make her stop at Dairy Queen for dessert