Sometimes I wonder if I got into a relationship with a trans girl because I felt I wasn't worthy of a 'real' girl and just wanted something easy. That or trans girls just excite me more. I'm a straight guy. When I was with my ex (trans girl) and she'd be unbereable sometimes (schizo meltdowns) I wondered if I should just go for a CIS girl so that at least, if she has stupid meltdowns that ruin my day, at she would give me children and a family to my own. So yes, the meme about straight men wanting to give up on their trannies when they realize they're setting themselves up for a genetic dead end is real. What really excites me is crazy obssessed bpd girls that shower you with love. That's why I dated a trans girl. But turns out the love bombing comes with equally terrible lows where she is beyond crazy and has the frontal lobe of a 5 year old.

Dating a trans girl felt like having a little kid. It didn't feel like having a woman I could trust. It felt like someone I had to parent due to how dysfunctional she was.

She was abusive af but I still want her back. What is wrong with me? I keep wishing she texts me one day something like "Do you still love me?". It is so delusional. I am broken. I'm the one who left and ended things because she cheated me and I can't stop to look back and think, what if? I still love her and it hurts. It's been weeks and my heart still sinks. There's not a an hour of the day I don't have a passing thought for her. I miss her, and my heart wants to believe she does too, even though it makes no sense, even though she probably moved on.