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7/22/2025, 11:32:49 AM
>>81915600
>so the only thing that keeps me going are dopamine sinks
like what? those dont work for me anymore
>>81915629
>i don't think any1 can replace u
things and people only have as much value as you put in them. put the same value you put in me into someone else and there you go.
>but that probably wouldn't do much, would it
it wouldnt, so put your mind at ease and stop trying so hard. its pointless to hate yourself for it
>>81915769
i hope they are anon. do your best
>>81915749
>hope you slept well
...eh. ill take juice over tea though.
>it serves no purpose either
then why the hell is it there in the first place. keeping it closed is pointless, keeping it open is a waste. its broken and it can only be in either of those states.
>so you're selfish
...yes. i dont want to think other people are selfish too because then it would make me hate everyone. and i dont want it to be that way. so i blame everything on myself.
>value is completely subjective
i agree... my happiness to me seems so worthless compared to the one of everyone else's. i guess i need to start entertaining the thought that other people value mine too.
>why do you still have 2 kidneys then?
because im lazy and selfish.
>say, how do you expect someone to love you if you refuse being loved, or acknowledging being loved?
i dont know... sorry. i'm so disillusioned i cant even imagine someone caring for me that much. i refuse to believe it because if i did and then it wasnt true, it would hurt so so much. im scared and i push it away. i dont think im undeserving of it (most of the time), but to more it seems more like a fantasy rather than something that can be a reality.
>if you had someone beside you, what would that change in your life?
i'd have a reason to do things, to be alive and not give up. as of now i just grasp to whatever i can come up with and each time it feels more like im slipping.
>what would you want to do next?
...be happy?
>so the only thing that keeps me going are dopamine sinks
like what? those dont work for me anymore
>>81915629
>i don't think any1 can replace u
things and people only have as much value as you put in them. put the same value you put in me into someone else and there you go.
>but that probably wouldn't do much, would it
it wouldnt, so put your mind at ease and stop trying so hard. its pointless to hate yourself for it
>>81915769
i hope they are anon. do your best
>>81915749
>hope you slept well
...eh. ill take juice over tea though.
>it serves no purpose either
then why the hell is it there in the first place. keeping it closed is pointless, keeping it open is a waste. its broken and it can only be in either of those states.
>so you're selfish
...yes. i dont want to think other people are selfish too because then it would make me hate everyone. and i dont want it to be that way. so i blame everything on myself.
>value is completely subjective
i agree... my happiness to me seems so worthless compared to the one of everyone else's. i guess i need to start entertaining the thought that other people value mine too.
>why do you still have 2 kidneys then?
because im lazy and selfish.
>say, how do you expect someone to love you if you refuse being loved, or acknowledging being loved?
i dont know... sorry. i'm so disillusioned i cant even imagine someone caring for me that much. i refuse to believe it because if i did and then it wasnt true, it would hurt so so much. im scared and i push it away. i dont think im undeserving of it (most of the time), but to more it seems more like a fantasy rather than something that can be a reality.
>if you had someone beside you, what would that change in your life?
i'd have a reason to do things, to be alive and not give up. as of now i just grasp to whatever i can come up with and each time it feels more like im slipping.
>what would you want to do next?
...be happy?
7/14/2025, 2:22:35 PM
>>81824151
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-RFdnFV6MAI&pp=ygUecmFkaW9oZWFkIGxldCBkb3duIHBsdXMgY2hvcnVz
honestly the chorus sounds so haunting and i love it (and hate it because it makes me cry)
there's also a version which is only the chrous that is very nice
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-RFdnFV6MAI&pp=ygUecmFkaW9oZWFkIGxldCBkb3duIHBsdXMgY2hvcnVz
honestly the chorus sounds so haunting and i love it (and hate it because it makes me cry)
there's also a version which is only the chrous that is very nice
7/8/2025, 9:31:01 AM
>>81753258
i have so much love to give away and yet i cannot find a single person who is willing to accept it and treat it with care and it makes me want to fucking die
i have so much love to give away and yet i cannot find a single person who is willing to accept it and treat it with care and it makes me want to fucking die
7/4/2025, 8:18:53 PM
>>81713297
i get how you feel im also starting to feel more and more apathethic towards things. although, in a way it has made life more bearable: things that once hurt me or gave me insane anxiety now dont matter to me as much since im gonna die in a few years anyway. if you also find yourself feeling that way, then i suggest you spend everything you got left and do whatever it is you wanna do or that you couldn't do in the past before you kick the bucket.
i get how you feel im also starting to feel more and more apathethic towards things. although, in a way it has made life more bearable: things that once hurt me or gave me insane anxiety now dont matter to me as much since im gonna die in a few years anyway. if you also find yourself feeling that way, then i suggest you spend everything you got left and do whatever it is you wanna do or that you couldn't do in the past before you kick the bucket.
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