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7/12/2025, 7:40:08 PM
>>40342074
(1/2)
Still a student, good. How is your friend circle, do you think the remaining time lends itself to maybe getting to know a few more people to keep in contact with post grad?
>I wish people were more forgiving.
>It's hard to know if I'm the issue, others, or it's simply not meant to be.
It is never "not meant to be" in my limited experience. There are too many people almost exactly in our shoes for this to be possible. It doesn't mean it is easy.. sadly.
>Circumstances and mindset.
The mindset aspects you experience will, most likely, stop being an issue when you are exposed to people enough. All these "not enough" thoughts cannot survive in the face of a contradicting reality. There is, however, also another thought. Take those qualities you named. Pretty, cool, stylish.. and genuinely reflect upon when the last time was you decided against being someone's friend because they were lacking in any such regard. Flip the script, as I often say. Now circumstance is the tough one.
>My parents, they're good people, but are sometimes emotionally stunted.
This is also usually not the kind of thing parents are good for.
>Friends have their own shit to deal with, or are simply not close enough for them to really care.
Okay, this is essential: yes they have their own shit to deal with. But everyone will, always, forever. You got to accept that. And you got to accept that, if everyone were to wait for the right moment like this, which as established never occurs, nobody could lean on anyone. And.. people need to be needed. It is a harrowing experience to not have anyone that relies on you, I find. Sure some people can live without that but they will let you know.
>I sometimes lend a listening ear to their woes, but I just get the feeling the same grace would not be returned to me.
You deny yourself there. You can frame it as something on top of grace: People need to be needed. Be their fulfillment.
(1/2)
Still a student, good. How is your friend circle, do you think the remaining time lends itself to maybe getting to know a few more people to keep in contact with post grad?
>I wish people were more forgiving.
>It's hard to know if I'm the issue, others, or it's simply not meant to be.
It is never "not meant to be" in my limited experience. There are too many people almost exactly in our shoes for this to be possible. It doesn't mean it is easy.. sadly.
>Circumstances and mindset.
The mindset aspects you experience will, most likely, stop being an issue when you are exposed to people enough. All these "not enough" thoughts cannot survive in the face of a contradicting reality. There is, however, also another thought. Take those qualities you named. Pretty, cool, stylish.. and genuinely reflect upon when the last time was you decided against being someone's friend because they were lacking in any such regard. Flip the script, as I often say. Now circumstance is the tough one.
>My parents, they're good people, but are sometimes emotionally stunted.
This is also usually not the kind of thing parents are good for.
>Friends have their own shit to deal with, or are simply not close enough for them to really care.
Okay, this is essential: yes they have their own shit to deal with. But everyone will, always, forever. You got to accept that. And you got to accept that, if everyone were to wait for the right moment like this, which as established never occurs, nobody could lean on anyone. And.. people need to be needed. It is a harrowing experience to not have anyone that relies on you, I find. Sure some people can live without that but they will let you know.
>I sometimes lend a listening ear to their woes, but I just get the feeling the same grace would not be returned to me.
You deny yourself there. You can frame it as something on top of grace: People need to be needed. Be their fulfillment.
7/6/2025, 9:42:10 PM
>>40281912
Yeah, I miss my biflag too!
Spiraling sometimes happens, yeah.. I am glad you weathered the storm. The difficulties many of us are facing are heavy, yeah. At the same time, it makes me glad that, in the face of how powerlessness we often are, we can at least be there for one another like this.
It's definitely worth trying out other therapists to see if you click! But you also make a great point about advocating for yourself. As for the kindness.. Hm, I do you feel you have emotional support?
>I'm kind of thinking of it in terms of energy; what ideas about my future are energizing in the present?
perfect! And your list looks good, too!
>>40282123
>kind of hard for me to tell recuperation/backsliding
It is a tricky thing but I suppose the difference comes down to preventing the break to become an indefinite state.
>I still feel like I'm craving something.
As for the feelings.. you trying to articulate them, name them, trying to explore their purpose or function can and will help. But yes it IS hard.
>cool...
I know it sucks, but it is better to know it can happen than to feel broken and alone right? You aren't broken. Human hardware kinda sucks, is all.
>Or you share stuff externally with other people?
That part. I express my emotions outwardly and work through them with others.
>feels like a lost cause, but I'll keep trying for something like that I guess
If it doesn't work well for you, don't worry too much. It is one approach among many, I could really stand to make a wider array of recommendations, come to think of it.
>I've really liked Heidi Priebe lately
Never heard of her!
>it's closely aligned with a lot of the cptsd & toxic shame stuff on this general
I dug a little and found this to add to the resouces: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y47iJrbO2ug.
The draft for her entry looks like this right now https://sntry.cc/3e7f202071, anything you think I should add to the examples that you might rec in particular?
Yeah, I miss my biflag too!
Spiraling sometimes happens, yeah.. I am glad you weathered the storm. The difficulties many of us are facing are heavy, yeah. At the same time, it makes me glad that, in the face of how powerlessness we often are, we can at least be there for one another like this.
It's definitely worth trying out other therapists to see if you click! But you also make a great point about advocating for yourself. As for the kindness.. Hm, I do you feel you have emotional support?
>I'm kind of thinking of it in terms of energy; what ideas about my future are energizing in the present?
perfect! And your list looks good, too!
>>40282123
>kind of hard for me to tell recuperation/backsliding
It is a tricky thing but I suppose the difference comes down to preventing the break to become an indefinite state.
>I still feel like I'm craving something.
As for the feelings.. you trying to articulate them, name them, trying to explore their purpose or function can and will help. But yes it IS hard.
>cool...
I know it sucks, but it is better to know it can happen than to feel broken and alone right? You aren't broken. Human hardware kinda sucks, is all.
>Or you share stuff externally with other people?
That part. I express my emotions outwardly and work through them with others.
>feels like a lost cause, but I'll keep trying for something like that I guess
If it doesn't work well for you, don't worry too much. It is one approach among many, I could really stand to make a wider array of recommendations, come to think of it.
>I've really liked Heidi Priebe lately
Never heard of her!
>it's closely aligned with a lot of the cptsd & toxic shame stuff on this general
I dug a little and found this to add to the resouces: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y47iJrbO2ug.
The draft for her entry looks like this right now https://sntry.cc/3e7f202071, anything you think I should add to the examples that you might rec in particular?
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