>>40444105
>>40449537
(and more links but the spam filters prevent me..)
Alright, I am now giving things a thorough read.
It's clear the two of you are fundamentally incompatible. From what I gather the /sig/ server is involved too. I must say, from an outsider's pov, it is impossible for me to meaningfully assess the situation, but it is clear you two are better off apart. I usually don't get too involved on the server side but there is no harm in tugging my sleeve over there. This is meant for both of you.
>>40445796
Thank you for your patience with me, bunon.. Been in maintenance mode the past few days, finally catching up with the thread proper.
>I really don't want this to be a waste of time and resources.
>I dont wanna be a waste of space.
I don't think you are either, but I would miss the point focusing on that. It still needs saying because learning to categorically reject such notions is self preservation.
>I just can't seem to pass the tests, my brain just doesn't want to work.
Well, that sounds like you have been burning the candle from both ends trying to achieve independence as quickly as possible.. Are you perhaps about to burn out? If so, taking a week off will allow you to reach your goals quicker than crashing and burning.
>gonna have to catch up on sleep as much as I can.
>Will explain more as I catch some time.
Good idea.
>Thank you for your time and interest, I really appreciate it.
And I appreciate you, rest assured.
>>40487674
Anon, please hit the breaks and let us talk about this first. What is it you lost, what other circumstances make up your life? Have we had the pleasure before?
>>40487676
Oh Tim, it's a pleasure. I do remember! Been a bit.. you are the bright mind that I had some pleasant conversations about intellectual pursuits with, I believe you felt unmotivated and understimulated lacking people to talk to. We had an ongoing conversation across multiple threads. Is that right? How did you feel about it overall?

>>40149768
>had a disastrous therapy session a few days ago.
I'm sorry to hear, Anon. I would like to hear more about this cause:
>this really isn't working!
>I'm the reason why therapy is failing. she's been my therapist for 8 months now.
This... is not a normal thing to say, I think. This is a bit alarming. Look up reviews of that therapist online, if there are any. This is exceptionally sus.
If a therapist causes you to break down (though I would like to know more about the circumstances if you can bear it), then that is not something they should blame you for!
>I think I would've kept spiraling if it weren't for that.
Yes, self isolation is actually surprisingly dangerous. I am glad you pushed the guilt aside. One recommendation I want to make for you, to hopefully alleviate the guilt: People need to be needed, too. It is important to remember. Letting someone be there for you also makes them feel like they give you something. Everyone likes to give and feels selfish to take, but nobody can give anything without the other accepting to take.
>>40154915
I hope it worked out, please don't beat yourself up no matter how it goes.
>I'm shooting for going tomorrow. I hope I can bring myself to. I have a plan to kind of "bribe" myself, I'll know how effective it is by my next update.
>I've isolated myself too much and don't really have anyone that I'd be able to request something like that from.
I think you might be underestimating what people are willing to do for acquaintances. We urgently need to have you in contact with people, then. Jog my memory real quick, do you have any peers you could contact?
Alternatively, what is your time zone? You might have someone on the unofficial sig server you could ask in a pinch, for body doubling specifically at least.
>>40161433
Ah, struggling with it I take it. It must really suck. What are your experiences like?