got a lot done today. think tomorrow might be kinda crazy on the market, hoping to make the best of it. gonna go to the gym.

you need help babe. and i'll keep giving it, offering more. you scorn and spite me and it hurts but i'm going to fix you, and you will apologize someday. you might think my efforts are wasted, but that's peak irony because really it is yours. you're nothing but a cheerleader that has no hand or part in what's going on in the world, and you've lost your moral compass along the way. you've traded a good part of your soul just to be comfortable watching a show, and you should be ashamed of yourself. that's alright though. if i wanted someone perfect i'd be alone for the rest of my life. you have some really good qualities too, they're just being wasted right now. it's hard work getting through to you, thankless and humiliating, but i will reach my goal someday. and at least i have a goal that can be reached. never understood the point of cheerleading, out on the field we couldn't even hear them.

three times ignored by my "new friend," feeling bad about that. but that's all i'm gonna pester him with. i don't love him after all. good luck avoiding me in the gym though, i won't be leaving. and speaking of the gym i'm getting really good gains, over 170 lbs now if i have a meal in me. and getting really great face-gains as well, i saw myself in the gym mirror the other day... sooo cute, probably why i didn't end up crying yesterday. you'll all just have to take my word for it of course, but i'm really feeling good about myself right now, planning to get out a lot more and be seen, and not surprised attractive people (male) are catching feelings. bragging a bit but you all know by now i've been hitting the gym very hard, and it DOES pay off in so many ways, strength, health, and looks, and you should all be doing it.

went to gym. cardio day. improved a bit. added pullups(12). will add chinups next time probably, should have done them tonight but i like improving every trip, left some gas in the tank because i hate cardio so much it's the worst. it's good for you though. you all should do it. me and the biggest guy in my gym agree on that fact. said hi to another one of my gym friends, he was squatting big weight tonight. next time i'll try to make conversation, today i had to ask him his name again though, i'd forgotten. i'll get better, and i initiated all of my gym friendships after all so i can't be doing that bad. only napped one time today, another improvement. so yeah, working hard for what i want still. hope everyone else had a productive day. gains are the goal.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hFDcoX7s6rE

did a lot of chores. gonna go to the gym and hopefully get to bed before 1 am tonight. hope you make it too john, sorry if i miss you tonight, you're doing great though.