All jokes aside why dont you grown men move onto actual skill based more deterministic games? Constructed formats in tcgs literally and I mean literally take 0 skill and brain power and are all following the meta which is solved a week or two after a new sets release.
Try games like pic related, rftg, terra mystica ect.
You cling onto the thematic portion of your favorite childhood artstyles in favor of gameplay and you end up on these threads...