>bring wet food to my wife's cat
>waiting for cat to finish eating
>point at my wife's birth control pills
>whisper "my nemesis"
>wife reassures me that I've been battling it regularly
I'm gonna win eventually. And it has to win every time, I only have to win once.

>>81663654
>why would they reproduce with you instead of someone taller than themselves?
Because she's already married to me and says I deserve to have a kid.

>>81500714
>get back home after walking one of my cats
>neetwife makes drowsy cat sound
>she is drowsing in bed
>go give her a hug
>she asks me to put her weighted blanket on her
>tuck her in with weighted blanket, kiss her on the cheek, and tell her she's the best
>she says "no, you're the best" and goes back to sleep
I'm gonna knock her up