>>40936471
It’s frustrating to fail, and tempting to identify with failure — to think that you failed because you’re you. But thinking that will only discourage you from trying again, which is no way to succeed.

Mistakes can be a constructive part of learning and problem solving. This idea that making mistakes can be a part of learning is a helpful attitude but hard to find because memorization and repetition are faster and easier than promoting creativity and independent thinking. I recently heard the process of making a mistake and trying again as an emotional skill called “frustration tolerance.”

It’s also important not to think of learning as doing something right every time after a minimum of instruction, instead of performing inconsistently with ups and downs as you practice a skill.

If you want more specific advice, tell us what you’re trying to accomplish, what you’ve tried that hasn’t worked, and odds are good someone will talk you through the details of doing what you’re trying to get done.

But you’ve got to be willing to try again first, you know?

>>40693404
I once saw a post that said, “There is a seductive comfort to hopelessness. It has an answer for everything, which is that there’s no point in continuing to try.”

It’s easy to give up. It’s much more intimidating to keep trying, keep working towards goals that feel so frustratingly remote. It’s easier to decide that your latest setback proves you will never accomplish what you’re trying to achieve. It’s hard to keep going and deal with the frustration of false starts and setbacks.

But I have to say, putting a year or two into taking better care of myself, trying to change my life for the better, knowing I’m not putting the work off… that all has felt a whole lot better than staying negative.

I was also afraid for a long time that trying to achieve my goals would hurt more because I was afraid I might not get the outcome I wanted. And let me tell you, right now I still have a long way to go, and I don’t know how close I will ever be able to get to achieving my goals. But continuing to try feels so much better than holding out for some kind of guarantee that I will achieve this ideal result.

Also the stupidly obvious stuff like fresh air and sunlight, going on walks, etc. really can make a difference. They’re cliches for a reason. I also take an antidepressant but I do the other stuff too, you know?