>>536402707
>did she ever do something wife-like?
Well she never stops bitching about events from years ago. That's very much wife-like.

If she were my gf I would like to feed her tacos, tamales, burritos, and especially refried beans. But I would secretly cook all of these with butter and lard. While she’s out I would replace all the mirrors in the house with funhouse mirrors that make her look thinner. What’s that honey? Your diet soda tastes funny? That’s because I poured 50 grams of sugar in it.