The 4th Test of India in England series tomorrow @ Old Trafford.

England lead the series 2-1.

fuck off

England XI for the test:
> Z. Crawley, BM Duckett, OJD Pope, JE Root, HC Brook, BA Stokes (c.), JL Smith (wk), LA Dawson, CR Woakes, BA Carse, JC Archer.

whats happening forum?

>>149902494 (OP)
pretty sure australia play in less than 12 hours “champ”
absolute fuckhead

Mitchell Johnson is one of the scariest bowlers the games ever seen

/COUNTY/ streams for today here:
>>149901470
>>149901470

>>149902528
I can think of at least a dozen scarier

Anyone watching the old cunts match

might turn the heater on (briefly (im not some sort of mega rich guy))

/county/ more like /i could county on my left hand the amount of people who care/ lol

>>149902494 (OP)
not the best painting, strains the eyes to see what the fieldsmen are actually doing

>>149902536
name four

>no peewees, saffas or pakis for >their games

>>149902550
Lillee, Holding, Hughes and Ambrose

>>149902563
name four more

>>149902567
me, myself and i, (and me too)

>>149901569
I think it probably does
Batsmen can't get settled into their rhythm if the bowlers are causing different types of problems for them
I don't think Glenn McGrath would have been as effective without Brett Lee

>>149901578
I don't believe you ever told me that story, but I would like to hear it

>>149901645
Just get Porter to start screaming and shouting at everybody, that's usually successful for getting umpires to wrongly adjudge somebody out

>>149901695
A rather rum ranking system

>>149901776
Wuh-stuh-shuh
Literally as simple as that

"scary" would need to bowlsman average no more than 22 or 23 in test tbhqbwqyw

>>149901714
>>149901865
>>149902000
>>149902000
I think all counties except for one operate the 'free after tea' system
If you made the whole thing free you'd completely disincentive membership, so that wouldn't make sense
Tickets should definitely be cheaper though, given dwindling attendances, probably £10 normal / £5 concession would make sense

>>149902567
Larwood, Trueman, Archer and Willis

watercolour is fake soul

watercolour is fake soul & quoting old threads is freshcunt behaviour

>>149902596
>archer
so fraudulent, i can't even

Archer (horse) (1856–1872), Australian racehorse that won the first two Melbourne Cups in 1861 and 1862

happiness
more or less

Is that why Steve Smith still wakes up in the middle of night having pissed himself from nightmares about him?

>>149902520
I absolute fuckheaded your mum champ

>>149902613
Steve Smith makes many bowlers look more dangerous than they are
When he gets beaten it always looks ugly

Made the mistake of buying my laptop from some Indians
Needed a repair pretty much straight away and when discussing it with them they just tell lie after lie after lie
Why are they such a dishonest people :'(

remember when stuart broad got a little donk on the helmet and he became so terrified that he literally refused to ever bat again kek

this is why when i buy a car i immediately disregard any listing from someone with an indian or muslim name

just assume no one will ever help you and you will die alone
helps with self-sufficiency

Mitchell Johnson and Mitchell Starc are effectively just the same person

truth ICBM &

>>149902633
>this is why when i buy a car i immediately disregard any listing from someone with an indian or muslim name
difficult to do that here
best to just have the gumption to turn up and make your discriminatory decision there
turned up to inspect a car i thought was used by the bloke who responded to me. nope it was a daily used by his wife and on closer inspection the evidence was all over it

>>149902640
Thought they were
>both left handers
>both have soup-strainers on their face

Moustache'd Johnson and Ryano were better bowlers than any of the >le four horsemen of the apoocalypse

Prove me wrong.

mad how mitchell johnson waited until england's best players retired to wizard up an amazing series in a place that gets no viewership here

>>149902652
ive turned up and declined many a car purchase
always from a honkey tho
the first car i ever looked at was from an indian and it had such little oil in it that there was nothing on the dip stick, he told me if i paid the listing price he would throw in a complimentary bottle of oil. luckily i had my dad with me who told me not to buy it because i didnt understand cars at the time. since then ive only bought cars from Whites, and never had a problem (except once)
thanks for reading my blog

>>149902666
I don't think I can

>mentions the four horsemen ]
>those digits

>>149902494 (OP)
ai slop

hold me now
im six feet from the edge

Starc is the evolved Johnson

Thoughts on using the bathroom sink as a urinal? Any reasonable argument against it?

>>149902692
I'm six inches in your mums 'edge champ

>>149902682
there's so many things to look for on an old motor, it's a minefield
sadly being racist and sexist will still only go so far when buying a used car

>bowling average of 28
How terrifying was Ryan Sidebottom in his pomp? Some peewee mothers still whisper his name to get their children to bed

>>149902705
so true. the best move really is to finance a new car at 17.8% over 138 months
cheers

>>149902595
Cheaper tickets and encourage people to buy stuff, hot chips and merch all reasonably priced and turn it into a social pastime like it’s supposed to be. If your ground has a nice grassy hill sell fully loaded picnic baskets and county officially licensed tea thermoses, I’d love to buy a thermos as a keepsake from a day out at the cricket

>>149902666
Which four horsemen? Originally it meant Garner, Croft, Holding, Roberts
Then it was McGrath, Gillespie, Lee, Warne.
Harris was better than Lee and Gillespie, not the others

hats, sunscreen, linen gloves for the ladies

Can’t say I’ve ever been “scared” by fast bowling, I’m too skilled as a batsman to be troubled by it

PORTER GONE GOTTEM

>>149902548
lmao so true

i like to watch the county championship

weather forecast in old trafford has suddenly cleared
draw doesn't loom

>>149902698
misusing toilet appliances is an indian trait

>>149902741
Cummins, Starc, Hazlewood and Lyon obviously

Reminder that Stokes cheated

2 WICKETS in the over for Porter now. Sussex on the ropes

>>149902698
never pissed in a sink in my life (while sober)

Hasn’t rained here all day from what I’ve seen, not really sure if that’s indicative of Manchester weather

i like having a wee out in nature
nature as in the woods or shrubbery. none of that pissing in urban areas

>>149902768
lol we used to piss in the sink in primary school, started because all the boys would go piss at the same time and the trough was full kids had to wait behind other kids

>>149902141

there’s fuck all difference between finishing 1st and 2nd especially when you’re guaranteed to play every final at your home ground kek

>>149902114
fuark heem sleepy

Did he end up marrying this girl?
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/cricket/article-1203052/ASHES-2009-Mitchell-Johnson-facing-mother-battles-Edgbaston.html

bit of a dog isn't she

>one imprint
ummm ackshully johnson was man of the series in south africa against one of the strongest test sides of all time

you can tell how good he was by how much people hate him
same thing as bumrah

now why would you compare johnson to a chucker
makes one hmmm

why is adam milne batting 6 for the peewees lmao

>>149902815
possibly the most mid woman to ever exist

cheeseboard in a cardboard box, I didn't know the nouve had stooped so low

WILL SMEED'S ON FIRE
PAKISTAN SHAHEENS ARE TERRIFIED

>>149902891
>his local chippy doesnt do a charcuterie take away

>>149902886
because he can slog it

Mumrah is an all timer, probably because he chucks. Johnson was hot and cold, thoughbeit very good when he was hot. But so was Jimmy Anderson and we don’t go on about him

>>149902815
finna getting badged by that hairline

>>149902905
Anderson never bowled pace, just a trundler who could get wickets in England. The one notable thing about him was his longevity.

>>149902943
he pretty much played all of his games in England's cyrochamber conditions

Chuckrah should not be allowed to bowl the way he does if he's capable of bowling normally. His advantage is too much of an outlier.

>>149902943
he bowled medium-fast. But in the early part of his career, including when he was first picked for England, he was an out and out fast. Then he learnt to swing the ball and dropped pace.

>archer is 30
wtf

>>149902993
sad to think he'll only play 7 more tests

>>149902815
seems the type to enjoy a finger in the arsehole, just my first impression mind you

>>149903025
who isn’t?

why are you chirping now mate, not getting (You)s?

Anderson averaged 29 in away tests; Johnson averaged 31, so the home track bully thing doesn’t really apply here.
Anyway, the similarity is that they both had hot and cold streaks

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bUzkNSJKLA0
manchester is preparing the open top bus for whoever wins at Old Trafford

Sussex lose two wickets in quick succession. Simpson gone 34 off 88.

>India captain Shubman Gill has criticised England for breaching the spirit of cricket with their go-slow tactics in the third Test, lighting the touchpaper for an ill-tempered encounter at Old Trafford.
bit of a desperate accusation innit

He’s being hypocritical although to be fair England has a pathetic over rate

>>149902784
finishing 2nd you play 4th in the prelim if all games go to the favourites, finishing 1st you play 3rd in the prelim. It’s a shit system and the minor premiers should be rewarded with an easy finals draw, thing is the whole season draw is unfair and unbalanced anyway and the minor premiership is therefore worthless so it’s best not to dwell on these things

Our coach doesn't even have a wikipedia page. How embarrassing.

walking to bouldering

Business idea: shot clock like in tennis or rugby
Start it as soon as the ball goes dead. If you don’t start your run up before the clock reaches zero that’s a no ball.

Imagine spending money on mm6 margiela tee and acne jeans... Go back to 2012

going Scarborough thursday

Ethan Brookes deserves an England call-up

new to the game
looking forward to tomorrow, will be posting some bets
in the meantime, I have watched the extended highlights of the ashes 2005. great stuff.
Any other tests I should watch, preferably not England as i been watching loads of highlights so will have seen most

>>149904791
India vs Australia 1999, kino series

>>149904905
2000/01, even, got the date wrong

>>149904791
New Zealand's tour of India 2024 and the 2025 WTC final if you want something recent.

>>149904912
>>149904955
thanks lads
see you tomorrow, lets see if we cant win some money

just soared, floated up a v6

I seen Bashir the lion has been dropped
Liam Dawson is in, a mere spring chicken at 35
kek

>>149905146
dropped due to injury

>>149905169
I know, he fucked his finger and couldn't field, just messing.

AI response to a Manchester test wicket, condensed to an image, loads of text

>>149905247
Day by Day
Day 1: Fresh, Often Green, Some Pace and Movement
Early Condition: The pitch usually retains a greenish cover before play, especially if there's been wet weather leading up to the match. Groundsmen may trim the grass on the morning of day one.

Bowler-Friendly: Early movement—with swing and seam—favors fast bowlers, partly due to moisture and a grassy surface.

Bounce: Historically, Manchester had good pace and bounce, but in recent years the wicket has become slower and flatter, albeit with reliable, even bounce.

Batting: Challenging for batters in the initial session; conditions ease as the day progresses and moisture is driven out by sun or play.

>>149905256
Day 2–3: Settles, Favors Batting and Big Scores
Flattening Out: The strip typically becomes flatter, and batting gets progressively easier. High scores are possible if weather remains settled.

Consistent Bounce: Ball comes onto the bat reliably; shot-making is easier.

Seamers: The ball offers less lateral movement; bowlers need patience and skill to extract any help

>>149905272
Day 4: Beginning to Show Wear, Spin Slowly Becomes a Factor
Footmarks and Rough: Accumulated wear from bowlers' footmarks begins to provide grip for spinners, especially outside the left-hander's off stump.

Lower Bounce: The wicket may begin to lose a bit of firmness, with some balls keeping low.

Spin Begins: The slow nature of the pitch means spinners start getting more purchase, though not as dramatically as in the subcontinent

OZZY OZZY OZZY
DEAD DEAD DEAD

>>149905419
https://www.rte.ie/entertainment/2025/0722/1524824-ozzy-osbourne-dies-age-76-family-says/

33 quid to watch York in Scarborough on Thursday
What the fuck

lmao poor fag
price set to keep riff raff like you out

33 quid to watch Yorkshire in Scarborough on Thursday
What the fuck

33 mummy points to watch Yorkshire in Scarborough on Thursday
What the fuck

>>149901470
/COUNTY/ Reports & Highlights of, round 11 day 1:

>Division One

Hampshire
v Nottinghamshire 241/5.
https://youtu.be/txVvJiEmH2s
https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/cricket/articles/cz6g24w5092o

Somerset 250.
v Durham 145. & 5/2.
https://youtu.be/cWP5TZe9Jzs
https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/cricket/articles/cvgnz0p4zl3o

Sussex 204.
v Essex 152/4.
https://youtu.be/GQtaXkX2_0A
https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/cricket/articles/cwyk2m0myneo

Warwickshire 262/8.
v Worcestershire
https://youtu.be/NJD7cLr3tE4
https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/cricket/articles/czxe2q0rz75o

Yorkshire 282/4.
v Surrey
https://youtu.be/LJhq4cBZNQQ
https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/cricket/articles/ckgdp64yp4yo


>Division Two

Derbyshire
v Leicestershire 357/3.
https://youtu.be/quZ8sPz5k04
https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/cricket/articles/cx241xrdjjpo

Glamorgan 125/4.
v Kent 155.
https://youtu.be/iLkh4MMiiDs
https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/cricket/articles/cn7dp0ex5m2o

Gloucestershire
v Lancashire 290/6.
https://youtu.be/OS194B-WhGc
https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/cricket/articles/ckg3p7kw148o

Middlesex 319/1.
v Northamptonshire
https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/cricket/articles/c0q82j5zzg4o

YFO

lol the wecricket tarq is a paedo

betting lines for tommorow
I can see a range of bowling being effective, dawson being the outlier
maybe a combo of Archer, Woakes and Carse, with dawson to bump odds

>le most famous moment of his '''''''legendary''''''''' ashes series was bowling the mighty Jimmy Anderson
yes lads let's just ignore the 95% of his career where he struggle to land it on the cut strip though. australian iq on display once again

checked the reddit identity checks thing out for myself after seeing it mentioned in /cric/ the other day
quite grim I'm sorry to report. I expected when it gets implemented here I'd be able to still be in 'read only' mode and hear what you lads are talking about but they completely block access to the page unless you have proof you're you (selfie)
looks like it might be the end of the line for me. maybe it's a good thing. like when chain smokers go to prison and have to give up cold turkey then hit the gym and become huge. who knows? being forced away from this place might make me a shagger or something haha

griggid :DDDDDDDDD

https://youtu.be/0qanF-91aJo
https://youtu.be/CprfjfN5PRs
rip bla x

Aus v Wi starts in just under an hour (not that you would know by looking at the op)

gonna cry? gonna shit and cum?

https://www.instagram.com/reel/DMa1x6gyd1Z/

really strong smell of poo in here all of a sudden

wash yer soon to be btfo arse fella
sheesh

also...tmi†

tabla x

>Jake Fraser-McRetard dropped
based

hang on why is there two friday night games this week?

Doing a poo

>Kieran Hornsby worked as a teaching assistant in a school and is widely known for the YouTube channel wecricket

>>149902815
mitchell johnson has transmogrified into an indian

How to Cooper Connelly keep getting picked for the international side despite never performing in any format?

>>149910994
he was one of the best players in the bbl last season, bat and ball.
he will be one of our best players in 5 years time

>windies shit the bed episode
seen this one before

BIG DRE RUSS

>>149910781
no way

>>149910623
'chabin bla, hope ya stayin' rumba moite x

The problem with Australia is they always try to walk it in

appreciate dre russ, but let's not make this all about him

dre russ is the greatest hitter of 6s since chris brown

>>149911812
kek

>>149911710
I’m the king of the rumba beat

do cricket matches cure depression?

>>149911876
forgot pic

>>149911888
what a beautiful grift. Shame the county cricket teams didnt think of it.

>>149911876
cricket matches are a symptom of depression

memeswell is so fucking finished as a batsman

hes really aged a lot in the last two years

*cracks fingers*
Shmitchell Shmarsh

whyd you move to Canada fella?

my parents. dads a kiwi, mums a canuck.

>mums a canuck, dads a cuck
ftfy

>>149912232
reddit: the family
in all seriousness, seems like a decent country - particularly out of the rat race cities

>>149912253
It really is. I've been big towns my entire life. I did 5 years in Vancouver and that was enough city life for me.

>>149912277
roughly how big is the town you're in now?
we talking 100k people or more?
ive started to think i need to move out of Sydney

>>149912289
Right now 50k, which is about the perfect size

>my parents. dads a kiwi, mums a canuck.

>>149912320
I work in tech so I can work from anywhere with an Internet connection
literally no reason I should be subjugating myself to Sydneys cost of living
maybe ill move after next summer

>I work in tech so I can work from anywhere with an Internet connection
>literally no reason I should be subjugating myself to Sydneys cost of living
>maybe ill move after next summer

>>149912377

smells like shit in here

>>149912377
see you at gabba saar

dont think you will 'canuck'

>>149912378
Not a bad idea. Like I say, 50k is a good size. All the amenities, good public services, and good community. Just try and find a place with some real industry.

why dont you both just move back to india

>>149912442
looks like an abo to me

BIG JO IN

>>149912464
im white tho?

>>149912505
>>149912442

think i got food poisoning
had some runny england cricket this morning and can feel a west indies cricket brewing

Haydos bros....

>not posting the best pic

also this one

>>149912711
>>149912737
>>149912878
>>149912887
reckon haydos has had a cheeky flog over her eh

reminder that ausjeet thinks Sara Tendulkar mogs her

I thought Grace was like 30 years old but just saw she only recently turned 23.
Bit grim.

>>149912973
she does looker older than 23
too much sun me thinks

>>149912878
can someone pls photoshop him out of the photo for me

>>149913107
I can but whats in it for me

>>149913119
My ideas put wojak or pepe in his place wearing a baggy green

>>149913436
would you be happy for me to just green out his body and add the pepe head + baggy then?

>>149913046
that’s weird i thought taking lots of loads on your face was meant to be good for your skin

>>149913469
yes pls

The cricket general /cric/?

More like unimaginable fucking SHIT!

LMAO

how can we possibly recover

>>149912935
you've never seen sara in a bikini mate

Cricket on today lads

>>149913613

>>149913694
I know! excited!

public displays of affection are a massive turnoff for me, and the juxtaposition of the christian cross with the nakedness is quite jarring, sara tendulkar does neither of those things

>>149913782
>nakedness
grow up mate women should be able to rub their tits in your face and not have you assume that theyre "asking for it"

>>149914032
nice projection

Watch Liam Dawson take a fifer and then bashit get selected for the final test

all cricket fans hard drives should be looked at

do have some fire on there ngl

>>149914051
Bashir is out for the series

wonder how the indians will cheat England out of points this week

>bowls 8 overs an hour
HOW COULD INDIA DO THIS???????!!!?!?!

Ah yes England being deducted points again even though we have the lowest percentage of matches ending without a result

>>149904955
I don't think you can find any decent highlights or coverage of the NZ India 2024 series online
At least I couldn't when I looked a month ago
Think the BCCI are being gay cunts again

When Windies can only bowl 60 overs in a day magically that doesn't count as a slow over rate

>>149914333
are you suggesting it should be ruled differently?
if so, have you thought about the incentives it would introduce?

>>149914192
>>149914051
He'll go to oz and get selected to play in Perth even if Dawson pulls off a Laker special.

imagine the deck englel would roll out if they made the wtc final

>>149914333
you wrote the rules m8

the BCCI control the ICC that is a statement of fact

>>149914529
https://youtu.be/x-G28iyPtz0?si=BrkIX0hSgsjkfUoj

>i could get rent my flat out and receive 100% of the ~1100gbp a month, but according to /cric/ I don't own it

>could get rent my flat out

>>149914563
you cunts taught em cricket

what is land ownership anyway if you really get down to it it's just an excuse for violence. Why hasn't anyone organised a pro Israel protest ironically, can't get arrested for that. I think it's a good toss to win for a bowl today, so England should bat when they win it

Oi Zachy you bouldering today mate?

the Arundel paedo

>>149914638
no went last two days, Wednesday a rest day
you?

For me, blood and soil nationalism makes perfect sense when it serves my political purposes, but is a nonsensical social construct when it doesn’t. Same with migration. Scottish Protestants migrating to Ulster is colonial plantation and a bad thing. Global majority populations moving to Britain is just and inevitable in an unequal world

>>149914593
That would be sub-letting, it's a pretty well known phenomenon

i consider zachy to be one of my top five best friends

I consider everyone in this thread that isn't me to be a bot

consider this

>implying Zachy’s mum’s mortgage lender will allow him to let

What exactly is wrong with getting parental assistance when buying a home?

>gonna rain for most of Sunday
grigget

>England win toss and bowl

>>149914813
I got help from my parents for the deposit but I'd be fucking sour if I didn't have that and had to wait another 5 years to cover it myself. The situation for people earning actually decent money is absolutely horrific.

/COUNTY/ Championship, round 11 day 2:

>Division One

Hampshire v Nottinghamshire
https://youtu.be/AblW-KjCAoo

Somerset v Durham
https://youtu.be/KnzUpCBI9jg

Sussex v Essex
https://youtu.be/4JH0RkGgfvM

Warwickshire v Worcestershire
https://youtu.be/Ny_ASq5ClyM

Yorkshire v Surrey
https://youtu.be/ww1Hi1Zi5dw


>Division Two

Derbyshire v Leicestershire
https://youtu.be/RPpBR7Kf02Q

Glamorgan v Kent
https://youtu.be/obyKu-xcurI

Gloucestershire v Lancashire
https://youtu.be/6FT4QMq9fmQ

Middlesex v Northamptonshire
https://youtu.be/ZnC7vX6plCM

yesterdays highlights: >>149906220

when I bought my first home I didn't get financial assistance from my mum or dad as the deposit requirement was low and I had one of those "help to buy" accounts that matched the money I had in it.
but they did help me out a lot getting settled in, my dad bought me a nice bed and a mattress and my mum paid for a new boiler when we discovered the one in the house didn't actually work
helping you get started is what parents are for

>>149914832
not this again

>>149914832
pretty retarded 2bh

>>149914813
literally nothing. If your parents are both willing and able to do such a thing you'd be completely retarded to not take them up on the offer. I think you'll find that not everyone has such a thing.

Subhuman Gill on the radio talking about England not playing in the spirit of the game. while he lays down in the middle of the pitch and receives a massage

I own a unit, but I didn't look after it and now it's a pigsty but I'm too embarrassed to hire a cleaner or get a friend/family in to help until I make it at least presentable. We're talking mould from the piss stains level dirty here

> I'm too embarrassed to hire a cleaner or get a friend/family in to help until I make it at least presentable
feel this

>>149914883
family makes sense but if you are willing to pay to hire a cleaning company it doesn't, just let them pick up the key from somewhere and go out for a day

>>149914862
>You can no longer open a Help to Buy ISA.
kek everything's fucked

>>149914883
just clean it you lazy cunt

mornin' fellas x

>India have now lost 14 international tosses in a row. The odds of that happening are 16,384/1.

Times article headline yesterday
>No team has won when opting to bowl first at Old Trafford: over to you, Ben…
>

really strong smell of poo in this thread

wipe your arse then

Can’t remember any team winning at Old Trafford under any circumstances. Literally always rained off.
If I was a cricket administrator, I would switch all remaining tests to Old Trafford the moment England got a series lead

fascist

>>149914788
why wouldn't they?

the indian anthem
>arghaojifhduoihgiofdfdshgiheighrg marthadfjpsdfjn fsipf clanbunga oooo jallapapa =dfsadkfs

>>149914965
incredibly true

God Save YOUR King
Long live YOUR noble King
God Save the Memes

how many overs are we in for today? 40-50?

In Britain, the only thing that can change its pronouns is the national anthem XD

>>149914973
1, but it will be a really long one, lots of no balls

Old Trafford is such a sad cricket ground
>ruined the pavilion
>ruined the pitch when the turned it round
>two hotel boxes in place of stands
>more boxes
>some scaffolding in place of a proper stand

>>149914973
negative ten seems unlikely

Wouldn't take any captaincy advice from the coward Alistair Cook

>>149914958
Buy to let mortgage is a very different beast because now it’s more a business loan. If you start letting out your flat having bought it with a personal mortgage, you are almost certainly violating the terms.

GONE!!! FIRST OVER

blog brothers be like
>test match is on
>lets talk about ISAs and mortgages
Unsurprising you two have no friends

>>149914981
by the time they have finished remodelling it the Old Trafford compound will have more hotel rooms in it than the rest of Manchester

edged it again

Jimmy would have 2 by now

Should have picked Little Chef rather than old man Woakes, but then he couldn't have taken a wicket for Essex and helped bowl the Sussexers out yesterday.

They should knock the whole thing down and start from scratch and call the new ground New Old Trafford

>>149915037
man united is already doing that
it'll have to be New Old Trafford II

Don't think the Woakes experiment has been going too well this series

should knock it down and build a stadium that is actually in Lancashire, or Greater Manchester should admit it isn't real and be returned to it's rightful owners

The New New Old Trafford

Manchester Original's Stadium brought you by McCoy's

test
cricket

>>149914883

>We'll have a bowl please mate

We need a wicket here.

>We'll spend the entire test talking about how no English team has ever won choosing to bowl first thanks

Just dropped my pizza on the floor and it got a bit of cat shit on it

designated cat shitting floor

Reckon it’s time to take Chris ‘Chris’ Woakes out the back of the barn with the shotgun I’m afraid. The partnership has proven he’s a busted flush at the highest level. He’s all washed up. Stick a fork in his ass and turn him over, he’s done.

broken bat should be out

>>149915140
'risp toxoplasma gondii enjoyer

>>149915140

Here we go with the flow time wasting again

>>149915171
Got the vaccine for that.

RIP homeboy Ozzy tmdwu

>>149915166
>ass
Yanks out. End of.

>vaccine
i expect nothing less from an animefag

>>149915208
Nothing wrong with anime, lad.

>>149915233

Farokh Engineer and Clive Lloyd getting stands at Old Trafford, seems a bit pointless given they'll be knocked down to build hotels in the next 5 years

Will players still be coming out of Jimmy Anderson's end?

Choosing to bowl first and not taking a wicket in the opening hour should be a sackable offence for a capt.

me thinks englel need a wicket

West India would be all out by this point.

OuO
gib us the planet

England would 3 down

>>149915271
brown hands typed this post

THAT'S PLUMB

itt:posh paedophiles

i sense some bias from umpire jabba the jeet

I'm not posh

>>149915268

Why the fuck are they bowling first

>>149915287
I'm not posh

narcissistic neeks and posh paedophiles

I'm not a narcissistic neek

Watching the Pears absolutely demolish the Bears
Ethan Brookes is a talent
Actually, no he's not, he's out (I cursed him, whoops)

why does this ginger mong love batting second so much

>>149915330
le epic bazball chase

wants the thrill of a 4th inning chase

>>149915330
because he is a coward

>>149915330
>>149915334
wants the record for largest chase

Switched over to England now

>>149915268
problematic, archaic, flambe it

old strafford

>>>/o/28530459
>australians

>>149915368
jej

>reading paragraphs of shit
>reading paragraphs of shit in the form of a picture instead
>reading paragraphs of shit in the form of a picture linked from a board nobody cares about
that's a no dawg

>>149915373
Honestly hate hoons. Hope they all crash and die.

>>149915373
i hope he commits sudoku
definitely grew up fatherless

>>149915373
>pozzbournians

execute all umpires

going down leg

Think England could really do with taking a couple of wickets here.

>>149915440
Particularly the one who gave me out on Saturday when it was clearly a little high and a little down leg

>>149915394
stopped reading at "no"

>>149915447
hot take this

Woakes and Archer haven’t been bowling that bad but Carse is going at 5 an over for his three.
>not really quick enough to be considered a real out-and-out fast
>doesn’t swing it as much as others
What does he really bring?

he brings #passion4thegame and #mentalhealthawareness

time for some more bouncers me thinks

bit of chin music eh! haha! i love bit of aggro, a bit of mongrel ya know haha! missing in the modern game

>>149915499

Dab on the haters, Pakibro

Stokes will get bored in a minute and make Dawson bowl 20 overs this innings.

jaiswal needs the phil hughes treatment

>>149915394
>>linked from a board nobody cares about
as opposed to the massive community of sp/cric/
or honestly, /sp/ in general if you minus soccer

>>149915551
You want to drop him from his national side after a string of poor performances?

>>149915556
*jaiswal needs the sean abbot treatment

ppl who hate /o/ are bus riders who put their lives in the hands of low paid retards

>>149915566
Getting selected in every squad regardless of performance or ability?

>essex managed not to have lost a wicket
excellente, hope this continues touch wood. Cox with a ton up.

>>149915567
Hate buses
Hate cars
Hate bicycles
Hate the internal combustion engine
Love walking
Love physical fitness
Love creeks
Love summer days

>we'll have a bowl m8

>>149915582
good god, you're such a useless faggot.

>>149915574
yes

>>149915594
Any reason for this other than epic magical sky daddy?

>>149915596
Says the useless cunt who needs an internal combustion engine to whisk him from place to place along a collection of paths that he did not create and does not maintain. Do you carholes do anything for yourselves?

>>149915622
i ride a horse everywhere you bigot, i run on chaf fed horsepower, cunt.

>>149915567
bus drivers make 100k lad

>>149902815
Solid 7.5. Like an Aussie made Holden Commodore.

>>149915646
So you still don’t do anything yourself?

>>149915567
happiness in being oblivious to a subject isn't hate

>>149915606
it's magical sky daddy
now pray for a collapse heathen

got some caramel king that is so primo, it would make even the most jaded DUDE WEED hater pick up smoking a doob daily

>>149915663
glad you don't hate sex with women then

>>149915594
Why does he have a muslim beard

fucks sake lunch can't come soon enough.

>>149915683
Just reported you to crimestoppers, druggie.

>>149915660
you're just a salty lil faggot retard who cant get a license lmfao, definitely stay off the road clueless cunts like you kill family's.

second batting point up for Essex.

>>149915688
>le sex non sequitur
you should be in hollywood son, making movies with a wit like that

Anyone watching the cricket?

>play 2 hours
>have lunch
these late starts are ridiculous.
Should be 10am at the latest.

I've got TMS and have got the Sussex - Essex game on with the sound turned off.

>>149915713
I have probably forgotten more about motor vehicles than you have ever known. Cope more, slave. Your ICE won’t save you when your heart gives out due to lack of use.

>>149915734
cringelord
kys

>>149915744
No, I am quite based.

>>149915748
says the buswanker

I have forgotten more motor skills than you have ever known.

>>149915622
>along a collection of paths that he did not create and does not maintain
ackuyauly road users generally do pay the fees and duties used to fund road works. must be the case in first world Australia also.

>>149915768
Don’t drive buses. Don’t like ICEs and don’t like relying on others for transportation.

>>149915771
Paying for something is not the same as actually doing it.

>Hey babe i cant pick you up, do you mind if we walk 6km to the restaurant?

>must do everything to please imaginary women

>>149915783
taxpayers rule, tradies drool

>>149915797
LOL CONFIRMED VIRGIN FAGGOT

>>149915800
These skills aren’t difficult to learn, you know. Rather than paying someone to do things for you like a cockroach you can just do it yourself.
>>149915808
Let me know when your wife unlocks your cage.

>>149915826
>wife
you're a clueless lil virgin pleb

>>149915836
Looks like I struck a nerve. Did she lose the key?

*bangs junction*
th-thanks for taxfunding my skills, carLORDS :')

>>149915842
>she
i only fuck men, you FAGGOT.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nra7r_Rn12k

>>149915851
It is full Maytime by the trees and grass now. But the heavens are full of roar and riot. You cannot even hold a shouting conversation in the garden now, save about 1 a.m. and 7 p.m. – unless the day is too foul to be out. How I wish the “infernal combustion” engine had never been invented. Or (more difficult still since humanity and engineers in special are both nitwitted and malicious as a rule) that it could have been put to rational uses—if any.

i forgot 4chan was just filled with spergy buswankers and footpath wanderers

why does carse sound south african?

Currently eating carrot and coriander soup

>>149915896
reckon bc he is

>>149915896
take a wild guess

>be's have a bowl thanks

Based Worcestershire man Khurram Shahzad destroying the brummies
Already much better than that fraud Jacob Duffy

>>149915896
at least marnus doesn't even have a hint of an accent

>>149915937
He moved to Queensland when he was 3. Josh English has a noticeable accent, so does Michael Neser.

>we'll have a 7km walk to the grocery store thanks

Marnus is noticeably a god botherer like many South Africans.

>goes on about how certain areas of the country are no longer English, have no soul and are lost
>"Based Worcestershire man Khurram Shahzad"
all of "worcestershire" one month isn't it? so dumb you could be a soccer fan.

>>149915582
So true
The invention of machines was a mistake
People who rely on cars are all fat lard arses
The humble walker reigns supreme

ffs Lancs game hit Lunch with Green on 98, now there is way they declare over lunch despite having put up 415

>>149915966
Think you may have failed to pick up on my devilish irony there
Can only assume you're an ethnic (proper Englishmen are highly attuned to irony)

>>149915969
LOL

>>149915957
7km isn’t even particularly long. 1km takes roughly 7 minutes to walk at a good pace. So it would only take an hour and forty minutes to get to the shop, do your shopping, and walk back.

>n..n..no no I was being ironic and only pretending

>>149915988
LOOOOL

>>149915988
>1km takes roughly 7 minutes to walk at a good pace
An ok running pace for 1km is around 5:30, walking is more like 10 or 11 minutes

>>149915946
he was like 11 he just had the accent beaten out of him despite having all the other saffa traits

>>149915996
Maybe I’m just a fast walker, then.

anyone know who won the toss?

>>149916005
HOLY LOL
you're beyond retarded

>>149916010
Steady on.

>>149916018
Slow down cowboy

look out we got a speed walker ITT

Wish a certain Indian-born poster would stop ruining the thread.

https://www.worldwideworldrecords.com/post/fastest-to-complete-1-km-walk-by-an-individual-achieved-by-haneef-mohammed
>On 18 December 2024, in Abu Dhabi, United Arab Emirates, Haneef Mohammed achieved the incredible feat of completing a 1 km walk in just 7 minutes, setting a new world record in the process.
Just do seven world record walks in a row to the shops bro.

if you walked at 4mph, which i don't think is too slow or fast, it would take approx. 9 minutes and 20 seconds to walk 1 km by my calculations.

>didn't deny being a virgin

>>149916029
I'm not even half indian

walking to wankering

fucks sake. just been told I now *have* to be in the office tomorrow and friday, means I can only have the test on the radio (and maybe not at all on friday if my boss is in)

wanking to bouldering

just in, hows the pitch been
I am guessing not much in it

>>149916033
This is silly. Race walkers do better than that daily. I do better than that as well. 7 minutes is not that fast for a 1km walk.

Walking at 7 mins per km means a time of precisely 83 days between Dover and Melbourne. If I start walking on 4 October, I'll make the Boxing Day test.

>the virgin walker
his power is unmatched

>>149916105
I’ve reported you to the mods for subverting board culture. Enjoy the three day ban.

lads at Old Trafford brought a whole pie and veggies to the cricket

>>149916119
Announcing a report submission is a flagrant breaking of our site's rules. I'm sorry for what I have to do

I forgot the cricket was on

GONE

>>149916123

>>149916123
fack
starving now

GOTEM

>>149916137
Announcing an actual report is indeed a violation, however, I did not make an actual report. Now that you have outed yourself as reporting me for it you will face a ban and I will face no consequences.

YES I DO BELEIVE YOU'RE OUT MATE

So maccas are pushing that big arch shit in the UK as well? It's just a mcfeast with the tomato taken out.
>>149916123
>massive amounts of carbs from the pie crust
>four potatoes as well

fell asleep and missed that

>>149916177
Spuds are good.

is any cunt actually watching the cricket?

imagine if he'd nicked that and the keeper dropped it cold
>>149916188
never said they weren't, just a bit too much carb loading for me.

>>149916177
Fuck up about carbs cunt, no one cares

>>149916193
im watching and playing rimworld

Simon Mann pronounces Carse "khazi"

>>149916193
we don't do that here

>>149916194
Never worried about carbs and kilojoules and all that. Just eat less if you start getting fat.

>>149916193
I'm not

>carbs
kek, just eat food mate

>>149916193
nah m8 fell asleep

oi Sir Walksalot i hope you get struck by some poojeeta distracted on the phone whilst you speedwalk to your mandated job interview,

they're on track to score a cool 940 here

the betting markets on cricket are shite
why

>>149916228
Don’t associate with anyone who isn’t descended from the British Isles.

Might do a couple months of neeting while the ashes are on. Just cannot see how one could work under such conditions.

>149916228
what is this schizo on about?

>>149916240
good, degenerate gamblers shouldn't be entertained

>>149916240
poolapses are too common

>>149916252
my point is they are
I am looking to win money, not spend it and the options for betting on bowling are horeshit

>>149916250
ya dad

>>149916193
I am

[metapost] keep on falling for it Fremont (2023) sucked shit

if you aren't betting on the outcome of individual balls then you really don't know cricket

Never gambled desu. Don’t even know a bookie.

your mum bet on the outcome of my balls mate

>aaaaaaahhhhhhh no they don't offer options to bet on whether they'll bowl a wide in that over, or the precise number of runs Woakes third over will go for!

>>149916281
GONE GOTTEM
CLEANED HIM UP

games gone

Might have me a nutella sandwich. Maybe even two.

where has it gone?

I was expecting odds on how many wickets this session etc
nope
its literally bowl by bowl with some of the shittiest odds ever

>>149916297
lot of carbs to be eating at midnight

to old trafford

chick a bit of banana on there mate it's lush

>commentator has really good takes but an indian accent

>>149916309
Takes are for wicketkeepers.

Mel just gave us a shout out

>>149916240
ANYTHING COULD HAPPEN IN THE CRICKET! THERE IS STILL EVERYTHING TO PLAY FOR AND FOREVER TO PLAY IT IN!

I think the english need to settle down a bit on the australian top 3 when their 2 and 3 are literally fucking zach crawley and ollie pope

Cox gone on 132, good knock for him

>>149916333
Creepy is usually 1, and Duckett 2.

Nothing worse than sweaty Cox in your face

walking up to the shops, anybody want anything an an hour 40 from now?

>>149916309
take what?

>>149916365
Shops are shut.

>>149916355
lots of those down the Perth Steamworks.

>>149916365
some pillows for my feet, just spent two hours walking to the post office

>>149916365
can of coke thanks, make sure its cold

>>149916374
I was in Perth the other day. Stopped by on my way to Launceston.

>>149916365
get me some coopers stout m8

>>149916365
yeah just some maxibons if you can sprint for me

>>149916384
coopers extra stout is fucking ELITE
>>149916382
>>149916385
literally impossible task to keep these cold im sorry. Can't be done due to physics

>>149916365
Packet of AAA batteries. Energiser or Philips ONLY.

>>149916365
antiemetics

I wish I didn't have to sleep

Green now has 150 and Hartley has got to 80 so presumably any declaration will now wait till he has a century too.
goddammit Jimmy, call them in we have 497

>>149916400
Get a cooler bag or buy some frozen chips.

>>149916410
should have thought about that when you woke up

>>149916431
>>149916431
>>149916431

>>149916365
pack of winny blues mate and an iced coffee ta thx

>>149916365
farmers union and a sausage roll
and a paddle pop banana