tour de kurwa edition

>Current and upcoming races
04.08 - 10.08 Tour de Pologne 2.UWT
05.08 - 09.08 Vuelta a Burgos 2.Pro
06.08 - 08.08 Tour de l'Ain 2.1 M
06.08 - 10.08 Trans-Himalaya Cycling Race 2.1
06.08 - 17.08 Volta a Portugal em Bicicleta 2.1
07.08 - 10.08 Arctic Race of Norway 2.Pro
12.08 - 14.08 Tour de Pologne Women 2.1 WE
12.08 - 16.08 PostNord Tour of Denmark 2.Pro
14.08 - 17.08 Czech Tour 2.1
15.08 - 17.08 Tour de Romandie Féminin 2.WWT
15.08 Grote Prijs Yvonne Reynders 1.1 WE
15.08 Circuit Franco-Belge 1.Pro
17.08 La Polynormande 1.1
17.08 ADAC Cyclassics 1.UWT
19.08 - 22.08 Tour du Limousin-Périgord - Nouvelle Aquitaine 2.1
20.08 - 24.08 Lidl Deutschland Tour 2.Pro
20.08 - 24.08 Renewi Tour 2.UWT
21.08 GP Lucien Van Impe 1.1 WE
23.08 - 14.09 La Vuelta Ciclista a España 2.UWT
26.08 - 29.08 Tour Poitou - Charentes en Nouvelle Aquitaine 2.1
27.08 Muur Classic Geraardsbergen 1.1
28.08 Kreiz Breizh Elites Féminin 1.1 WE
30.08 Classic Lorient Agglomération - CERATIZIT 1.WWT
31.08 Bretagne Classic - Ouest-France 1.UWT
02.09 - 07.09 Simac Ladies Tour 2.WWT
02.09 - 07.09 Lloyds Bank Tour of Britain Men 2.Pro
06.09 Maryland Cycling Classic 1.Pro
06.09 Maryland Cycling Classic Women 1.1
07.09 GP Industria & Artigianato 1.Pro
08.09 - 09.09 Tour of Binzhou 2.1
09.09 - 14.09 Tour Cycliste Féminin International de l'Ardèche 2.1 WE
10.09 Giro della Toscana - Memorial Alfredo Martini 1.1
11.09 Gran Premio città di Peccioli - Coppa Sabatini 1.Pro

>Mecha-Rusbert's webm folders:
https://pastebin.com/Xjeg9zf7

>Bert van Koers' ciclismo quizzes:
https://www.sporcle.com/user/Bert_van_Koers/quizzes/

>Races info:
https://www.procyclingstats.com/
https://firstcycling.com/

>Free streams:
https://tiz-cycling-live.io/
https://cycling.today/live-streaming/
https://thedaddy.click/

>Velodrama league code:
51196855

Previous thread:
>>150069602

Tour de Pologne (2.UWT)
Stage 1
Wrocław - Legnica
199.7km

Startlist:
https://www.procyclingstats.com/race/tour-de-pologne/2025/startlist

Roadbook:
https://tourdepologne.pl/wp-content/uploads/2025/roadbook-2025.pdf

Live stats:
https://www.procyclingstats.com/race/tour-de-pologne/2025/stage-1/live

Streams:
https://tiz-cycling-live.io/
https://cycling.today/live-streaming/
https://thedaddy.click/ (search by "cycling" or by TV channels)
Eurosport / Discovery+ / HBO / TNT / TVP
11:40 CET

Waar dat gurl?

Rusbert hours

>>150094134
why do they both have burn scars all over the body

>>150094276
I don't know..
>How do you know it's not a birthmark, anon?

>Ka3ia

>Movistar is interested in singing Roglič, so much so they're willing to buy out his contract from Red Bull Bora

https://x.com/RuedaPedal/status/1951219670243021143

>>150094404
d2mi

Who wore it better?

>>150094408
at this point it could be actually ideal team for him lmao

>>150094408
Roglic on movistar would be sweet

>>150094408
lol, lmao even

Why aren't you at work? It's monday morning.

>>150094616
I'm shaving my chest, pits and bits so I can see my fat rolls better. How do I stop being a disgusting fat bodied amerimutt?

>>150094616
I'm on cycling holiday in the l'Auvergne

>>150094616
got a week off, will start my bikepacking trip on wednesday according to the current weather

>>150094616
I am working from home, but my first call is at 11 so I have some time to get a bit of gaming in. Still sore so had to skip gym today. What's your excuse?

>>150094408

>>150094648
What bike

lamo

>>150094676
sovl

>>150094630
Your options are diversifying.
>eat less
>eat better
>move more
>take Ozempic

>>150094700
What should I eat

>>150094408
weren't they supposed to sign ay*so?

>>150094671
gravel bike (with tt clip-on bar)

>>150094616
bert its 2am

>>150094635
got any tips for the region?

>>150094717
Less. The generic truths around food are true. Less processed foods, less sugar, less fat. If it tastes good, cut it out. It's not rocket science, it's just hard to execute if you have no impulse control.

>>150094630
have you tried eating less

>>150094408
The only reason they want him is the fact that they think he can still farm Vueltas for them

>>150094834
>2y contract
>fish vuelta this year
>pogi vuelta next year
>he retires

>>150094852
i welcome the rogdawg movistar era

>>150094834
He probably only cares about winning suisse

I just cleaned a sickening amount of body hair off my floor corners and baseboards

>>150094892
why dont you shave in the shower??

we live in Wroclaw

>>150094904
I will now

>>150094828
>If it tastes good, cut it out
That makes no sense

>>150094936
What? It makes perfect sense, as through most of human existence food with high caloric density was scarce as fuck and hunger and appetite were a vital core drive to keep humans alive. Now that drive leads us to eating exactly the things that are worst for our bodies, as they are abundant and overengineered to solely stimulate those cravings instead of satisfying our nutritional needs.

>>150094717
nothing but a healthy diet of burgers, bacon sandwitches and schnitzels

>>150094971
They are good for us that's why we like them.

>>150095013
you have never seen someone who drinks coke like water. obviously not true!

VERY excited to see if this very Tour of Polska 2025 will be the UWT stage race in which Christopher "Clive" FROOME returns to his 2021 form (47th in GC at the Dauphine)

>>150095013
Hopeless or shit troll attempt

>>150095105
Have you seen what remco eats

>>150095125
do tell

>>150095125
>doesn't know how to argue
Hopeless. Can you explain how this contradicts the information laid out by me? Moving more is one of the ways to fix your weight issue. If you match Remco's activity level, you can get away with not focussing on diet as much as you would have to with average levels of activity. I told you, you have options. You're either a combative brainlet or trolling in a very strange way. If you want to engagement farm, you can just offer some hot takes related to cycling instead of making it about your disgusting body and hair removal.

>30 seconds of racing followed by 2 minutes of tourism clips

>>150095138
https://youtu.be/gr2zt2UEJBY
dairy carbs and candy

>>150095253
Tomorrow we shall be treated with the uranian mines again

>>150095159
You're just jealous I'm streamlined now

movistar roglic would be one of the funniest peloton sights of all time

/CYC/ CHAMPIONSHIP 2025
TOUR DE POLOGNE
picks

27 Jan Christen
24 Matthew Brennan
21 Maxim Van Gils
21 Mathias Vacek
16 Ethan Hayter
15 Paul Magnier
11 Brandon McNulty
10 Finn Fisher-Black
10 Matthew Riccitello
9 Olav Kooij
9 Ethan Vernon
9 Vegard Stake Laengen
8 Tim Torn Teutenberg
8 Marco Frigo
8 Thibaud Gruel
7 Dorian Godon
7 Magnus Sheffield
7 Rafał Majka
7 Huub Artz
6 Antonio Tiberi
5 Victor Langellotti
4 Arjen Livyns
4 Florian Vermeersch
4 Timo Kielich
4 Diego Ulissi
4 Max Poole
4 Menno Huising
3 Michał Kwiatkowski
3 Natnael Tesfatsion
3 Jensen Plowright
3 Pepijn Reinderink
2 Madis Mihkels
2 Tomasz Budzinski
2 Darren Rafferty
2 Nicolas Vinokurov
2 Ben Turner
2 Matteo Sobrero
2 Casper Van Uden
2 Lars Boven
2 Yannis Voisard
2 Stefan Küng
2 Michał Pomorski
2 Michael Leonard
2 Jonas Koch
2 Pello Bilbao
2 Rémi Cavagna
2 Paul Lapeira
1 Niklas Behrens
1 Manlio Moro
1 Filippo Baroncini
1 Fernando Gaviria
1 Vlad Van Mechelen
1 Alberto Bettiol
1 Kamiel Bonneu
1 Quinten Hermans
1 Arthur Kluckers
1 Timo Roosen
1 Bob Jungels
1 Arvid De Kleijn
1 Daniel Felipe Martínez
1 Francesco Busatto
1 Johan Jacobs
1 Oscar Chamberlain
1 Hannes Wilksch
1 Max Kanter
1 Stanisław Aniołkowski
1 Johannes Staune-Mittet
1 Tim Van Dijke
1 Clément Davy
1 Casper Pedersen
1 Rudy Molard
1 THIBAULT GUERNALEC
1 Marijn Van Den Berg
1 Edoardo Zambanini
1 SEAN QUINN
1 Colby Simmons

2 ======

20 Jan Christen Matthew Brennan
17 Jan Christen Maxim Van Gils
15 Jan Christen Mathias Vacek

3 ======

12 Jan Christen Matthew Brennan Mathias Vacek
10 Jan Christen Matthew Brennan Maxim Van Gils
9 Jan Christen Maxim Van Gils Mathias Vacek

4 ======

7 Jan Christen Matthew Brennan Mathias Vacek Ethan Hayter
6 Jan Christen Matthew Brennan Maxim Van Gils Mathias Vacek

5 ======

3 Jan Christen Matthew Brennan Mathias Vacek Ethan Hayter Huub Artz
3 Jan Christen Matthew Brennan Maxim Van Gils Mathias Vacek Vegard Stake Laengen

>6 ======

2 Jan Christen Matthew Brennan Maxim Van Gils Mathias Vacek Ethan Hayter Paul Magnier
>/pinot/
>La bande de copains


2 Jan Christen Matthew Brennan Ethan Hayter Brandon McNulty Huub Artz Natnael Tesfatsion
>Marq Qwabendish
>mapeidurer


2 Jan Christen Matthew Brennan Maxim Van Gils Mathias Vacek Finn Fisher-Black Vegard Stake Laengen
>frfr on god
>Lennergy Pharma

>>150095252
WATCH OUT HE'S GONNA HIT Y-

>>150095345
> 0 Christopher Froome

>>150095253
Surprised they let a .UWT race get away with that. I would think UCI would set higher standards.

>>150095547
On the other hand they have a coverage on the entire stage
Not many races can say that
Looking at you San Sebastian with their annual 30 km coverage

>>150095547
Every race does this including TdF and Giro

Which of you knuckleheads gave him an eye infection?

>>150095707
He who goes to bed with an itchy bum wakes up with a smelly finger (and pink eye)

it's over

https://sport.tv2.dk/cykling/2025-08-04-rolf-soerensen-skal-heller-ikke-kommentere-vueltaen

>>150095877
>First, bicycle expert Rolf Sørensen canceled the Tour de France
peculiar

>>150095941
he cancelled last year because he had to go into rehab for alcholism

>>150094828
> If it tastes good, cut it out
it must truly must be awful living above the Med

>>150096298
Obviously it's hyperbole, but in the context of trying to explain food to an amerifat it's a reasonable shorthand. I love med food, even though one of your Portuguese witches ripped my fucking heart out.

>>150096385
Med women are absolutely fucking nuts. They're the forbidden apple.

>>150096341
>T-Rex Gold is an engineered multilayered geomembrane used for water retention applications.

>>150096394
Tell me about it.
>first long-term gf was half Greece
>most recent long-term gf was Portuguese
I am beyond salvation

>>150096385
I gave my father a book about the danish tour de france entrants over the years, i opened a random page and the first paragraph was bjarne riis saying if you ate until you're full you've eaten too much

>>150096404
maybe don't date outside your gene pool is the real lesson here

>>150096385
nah, it's ok bro, I believe every country has nice food if you search hard enough
don't know about the local witches tbqh, haven't been with many but love my wife to bits, it's probably the person most admire in the world.

>>150096404
lol my wife genuinely looks greek face wise but with extreme white skin, like a finish person, even tho she has brown eyes and hair like a sub Saharan woman. very peculiar.
I dunno, maybe the cultural thing is whats getting you, prot countries tend to be more reserved and individualistic societies, while here family and the community is a BIG aspect of life
or maybe they were just crazy kek

>This is a Cat 3 climb in Poland

could at least make cool tattoos instead of schoolkids doodles tier

>>150096501
My driveway would be HC in poland

G2 slurp is out of control today

They're barely in Zone 2

kooijwinslol

volta velogambling team submitted, no adjusting will take place, victory is certain

>>150096720
I can't stand this Velogame, someone give me a soulless basic team please

honestly kurwabert should build a pcs-like website so we could check /cyc/'s historical velogame stats

>>150096720
hardest game of the year

>>150096720
are you going to watch one of the stages live?
my mates want to see Montejunto but I dunno if I can take this heat in that place

bring back the seething Remco
cry baby Remco is cringe

>>150096913
First he put himself beneath god. Now he is beneath his fans. And soon he'll be submitting to his competition. Religion is the biggest psyop know to man.

>>150096913
>Ah, if you knew how much time we've wasted. Trying to save time can disturb us a lot.

CHUTE

Kooij wins

>>150096643
Please refer to my previous post

What was TTT thinking starting the sprint 500m from the finish?

>>150097042

Waar Brennan?

>>150097069
relegated

>>150097069
killing movistar runners

>>150097058

top 10

just rembered this classic from the bebo days
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bEGAIYKTZ9w

>>150097098

>>150094616
What is work. This weird obessions of normies to slave away half of their life is surreal to me. All that time couldve been filled with cyclismo instead.
Paypigging does not get you more cyclismo sirs, only more worries.

>>150094616
Working from home Gang

I'm at the office but still watched most of stage and posting here and elsewhere

>working

>>150097359
Work is the modern religion. Normies do not exist without work. It is much of what they discuss in my experience.

>>150097532
If no one worked, how would you get your neetbux?

Just back from my 5 hour goon. What'd I miss

>>150097556
I wish I could live from neetbux, but German neetbux are too low so I keep slaving away in my soulless middle management consulting job instead. You'd think top 10% income would afford you more than mediocre quality of living, Can't imagine what neetbux qol is like these days

>>150097588
I get 1200 a month but I live at home so that's good. Likely I'd have rent paid for in a grotty apartment. Considering I have all time to myself I am very glad and although others have more spending money, it's not much more and would I trade an extra 400 a month for 40hr of waging? No absolutely not. If you can get away with neeting then it's absolutely the way to go and only ones who scoff at it are turbo wagies.

>>150094789
I sort of make it up as I go. I wanted to try central masif because I've never really been here. I wanted to put it on my route on the way to the pyrenees so I don't have to drive 12 hours in one day but it's a nice area.

The climbs aren't very hard but the landscape is pretty cool and distinct compared to most of your regular mountainous regions.

The puy mary is a must do, cool climb you can do from 3 sides, the puy de dome looks cool but you aren't allowed to climb it because it's protected so that's too bad

>>150097774
nice wheels, what are those?

>>150097612
>I get 1200 a month
That doesn't pay for anything resembling quality of life, even if I were to downgrade to the absolute essentials
>I live at home
That's out of the question for me personally
>extra 400
Try 4000, and it still feels like nothing. Then again I'm discounting the 400 bhp car, the supersports bike I never ride and the area I rent in. Maybe I should restructure and look into giving up entirely and going for the neet life, sounds appealing.

Sorry for blogging, I'll shut up until Vuelta

>>150097801
Everyone is different. I had a nice car I bought a sporty hatchback, I sold that last week partially to save money. You could probably work part time hours or something similar. I found when I worked I spent recklessly because I was so miserable at work and wanted to fill that with stuff, be it expensive food or trinkets. I spend very little now.

>>150097801
What sport bike does cyc?

>>150097795
They are lightbicycle 45cm deep carbon rims for road. I bought the wheelset in 2020, no issues yet. Dt Swiss 350 hubs

>>150097835
I don't think I understand the question. I might have worded it poorly, but my motorcycle is a bigger cost factor than my bicycle (which I also don't ride enough).

/CYC/ CHAMPIONSHIP 2025
TOUR DE POLOGNE
stage 1

Under what circumstances would Kooij be allowed to ride in Le Tour '26

/CYC/ CHAMPIONSHIP 2025
TOUR DE POLOGNE
stage 1

>>150098157
In the circumstances that he is going there as part of AG2R La Mondiale Decathlon Citroen team.

>>150098157
>Under what circumstances
Trine goes apeshit and the fisherman retires

>>150098157
He's not staying, but if he would be staying I'm pretty sure visma lab would take him to the next tour to fluff up their 2nd place in GC with some stage wins

>>150098264
Chances of him signing with Visma for next year are nil.

Evenepoel always has this me against the world seethe attitude. Funny

big dinner tonight my Berts
thank dog I did loads of cycling this past week

>>150098324
holy shit pinot noir with alvarinho is soooooo good

>>150098396
Mixed together??

>>150098408
yeah, some kind of rosé my uncle bought
though it was a meme tbqh but it's perfect for these summer afternoons

They really need to lean into the coomer market when it comes to woman cycling. It has no other appeal. Men are too horny to watch it normally. Women don't give a solitary fuck. All you got left is the humble coomer.

>>150098547
I give a fuck

>>150098324
Thank my dog everyday bert

>>150098565
Jose? Is that you?

>>150098547
Trend is away from any coomer appeal in women's sports. The female atheletes' clothing is increasingly conservative, and frankly, the female cyclists are among the least attractive female atheletes there are. Haggardly face from being in the sun all day, and breasts small due to low body fat.

https://cyclinguptodate.com/cycling/theyre-not-riding-100-for-him-he-could-probably-double-his-salary-if-he-moved-but-jonas-vingegaard-is-warned-against-leaving-visma

I think women cycling should lean into the more race-craft and higher power angle, instead of the coomer gambit

my coworkers were talking about PFP's victory today at lunch and non of them seem like coomers to me

>>150098593
Brian Holm huh. There was something about him, a certain je ne sais quoi

>>150098689
extremely cringe

>>150098689
team vismai. this is capital punishment-worthy from their media intern

>>150098689
THey have to fire their somo intern.

>>150098704
>Hello intern #6. God emperor Plugge himself has ordered you to immediately commit seppuku to preserve the honour of your lineage and most importantly the team. You may feel this is harsh, but you must understand the interests of the team come first. hashtag samenwinnen

>>150098689
they really go for this great by association stick

>>150098689
Is this some kind of psyop to convince Pogi that to avoid nuclear cringe being dropped on the world he has to stop racing against Jonas?

>>150098308
Remco Seethenpoel

It's the 4th of August, and no transfer announcement yet. Lipowitzed?

>>150098736
in 20 years you'll have the kids of zoomers posting here about how jonas was ackually stronger than pog.

>>150098308
he could just admit islam is a problem.

>>150098547
the cute ones are not good riders. womens cycling is interesting as a difference in difference study. it's plenty interesting if you care about sports performance as a science

>>150098689
i hope this was written by AI, not by a human being

>>150098791

>>150098807
track is a different sport. Plenty of cute track femmes

>>150096892
I'm from the norf so I'll just probably make a cheeky visit to the prologue
will probably be the stage with the lowest temperature as well

>>150098818
Ferguson is also rather successful on a road for a 19 y/o neo-pro

>>150098689
Kwab of the day: novax djokobitch

>>150098818
Cat Ferguson's the reigning RR and ITT champion in her age category and she won a WWT stage this year

>>150098834
>>150098838
I wouldn't, I don't follow womens road racing

>>150098593
Meanwhile PFP wins the Tour de France on her first time with visma lab with two Dutch sport directors. And Pogacar was generally more isolated than Vingegaard in the key moments.

How much more help does Vingegaard need? Maybe 7 Danish helpers that all took a blood oath, a Danish sports director with Trine in the passenger seat and his kids in maxicosies in the back seats.

>>150098845
You have to understand, if his teammates had supported him fully he wouldn't have dropped +2mins on the itt.

>>150098807
She is the ultimate cute

>>150098689
Holy cringe, I'm assuming Poggers PR team never responded to this shit?

>>150098845
Their whole plan from the beginning was to tire out the peloton so Wout could mog everyone on stage 21. It worked perfectly. Bravo Visma. And as a bonus the annoyed Pog so much he withdraws from the Vuelta so Jonas gets and easy win. Double victory.

I really like Pauline's voice.

>>150094676
>Belgians
UCI won't do anything

>>150094676
bugs bunny tactics

Cat Ferguson nude calender. These are the ideas that'd skyrocket women cycling.

Would you buy a Ricarda plastic sex arse? I would.

I'm constipated. My belly is growing really big.

This girl finished top 10. Significant sex appeal. She could easily release sexy lingerie aimed at sporty women. Hell I'd even buy some.

>>150099080
Will make extra strong coffee in the morning.

On a side note it's striking how many germans posted about femmes yet they didn't have anyone in the top 30 and they didn't take a stage. That was strange maybe the coomer market is Germany.

>>150099135
Just drink extra strong coffee now. What could go wrong?

>>150099180
I'm drinking beer

>>150098845
This sounds reasonable

Do you think Jonas manages to give Trine an orgasm?

>>150099042
britney spears looking mf

>>150099154
so many of the women are puffy and round and cute faced what's that about

>chabbey
>bredewold
>bauernfeind
>bradbury
>smulders
>jastrab

>>150099332
Jonas and Trine remind me of the plapjak meme.

Where should Vingegaard go for a new team? Visma is the most retarded team I've ever seen in 15 years of watching pro cycling.

>>150099399
Strong facial structure and muscle faces. A lot of them have fairly broad shoulders. Slightly more masculine in general than most women and objectively more attractive because of it. Androgynous is the most sexually attractive type for men and women. The petite popstar or movie stars from the 50s is long dead. Not that people like fat arsed hippopotamus like women. Modern female track athletes are the pinnacle of female attraction.

>>150099364
She doesn't have pooey shit eyes like Spears seems to have so she's better in my books. Although I genuinely don't know what colour these are. Very dark green hazel eyes or something. Needs to get her face creams on point ASAP or she'll age like a pig.

>>150099594
Have you seen his results before he joined Jumbo? He owes them his career

>>150098593
Talking about teammates and all makes sense if you're the strongest because you need a strong team to defend yellow but here? Jonas needs to drop Pogi first of he wants a chance to win

>>150099609
i dunnobro touch grass or something life really isn't what you've been fed through a /pol/ thread