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Thread 212053904

64 posts 10 images /tv/
Anonymous No.212053904 >>212053990 >>212054134 >>212054221 >>212054243 >>212054256 >>212054410 >>212054606 >>212054664 >>212054822 >>212054836 >>212055955 >>212056283 >>212056517 >>212056717 >>212056758 >>212057527 >>212057660 >>212057993 >>212058664 >>212059840
>Can't act
>Practise meme martial art
>Complete asshole off set
>Compulsive liar
How does he have a career?
Anonymous No.212053990
>>212053904 (OP)
he has interesting eastern-european connections and is probably paid to launder money for said connections
Anonymous No.212054049
skinny seagal movies are good. it all went downhill when he became fat seagal
Anonymous No.212054076 >>212054170 >>212054427 >>212057688
im tired of all the steven seagal hate. its such a boomer/genx/millenial meme to hate on him. go through his catalogue, its not as bad as people make it out to be.
Anonymous No.212054134
>>212053904 (OP)
>Based
>Based
>Based
>Based
Anonymous No.212054170 >>212054317 >>212057464
>>212054076
steven seagal movies are the definition of slop but you're an amerimutt so I guess tasteless slop suits you
Anonymous No.212054173 >>212059293 >>212059402
6' 4"
Anonymous No.212054221
>>212053904 (OP)
what career?
Anonymous No.212054243 >>212056434
>>212053904 (OP)
Let me tell you something that might be a bit dangerous. Seagal was raised in Japan. He was schooled in martial arts. He was given the title of master. They take a movie “The Last Samurai.” They have a 5-foot-2-inch little guy, whether he was straight or gay, I don’t know. I don’t care. He had never been to Japan. He doesn’t speak Japanese. He has never held a sword. They make him the Last Samurai. Seagal got 450,000 phone calls [laughs] from everybody in the world saying, “That role was perfect for you. How did that happen?” Most of the people I know didn’t like the film and didn’t go see it. It’s just a classic example of Hollywood and the politics.
Anonymous No.212054256
>>212053904 (OP)
You just had to be there
Anonymous No.212054317 >>212057260
>>212054170
Anon, Seagal can't even get a movie in America anymore. That's why he spends his time jetting between Saudi Arabia and Europe. You're the sole consumer of his slop.
Anonymous No.212054410
>>212053904 (OP)
If you call that a career I guess, the dude is probably broke mooching off oligarchs. He was legit famous for only a handful of years a long time ago before every actor was a millionaire. I'm completely speculating but I bet the guy is pretty broke although I guess Russia is pretty lcol especially if you have friends in high places
Anonymous No.212054427
>>212054076
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EJ0nsaABbDo&ab_channel=Seagallery
Anonymous No.212054606
>>212053904 (OP)
His career is the result of a bet between two directors in the 80s to see if it was possible to turn any random retard into a star
Anonymous No.212054664 >>212056418
>>212053904 (OP)
Under Siege 1 and 2 were Seagal kino. Don't care about the rest but these two are legit great early 90s action movies.
Anonymous No.212054672
Dude got choked in his prime by a 70 year old Verne Gagne, and then he shat his pants while passed out.
Anonymous No.212054822 >>212056450 >>212056537 >>212061535
>>212053904 (OP)
Frank Stallone had a film career just before he was Sly’s brother
Anonymous No.212054836
>>212053904 (OP)
CIA asset who went rouge and now works for Putin
Anonymous No.212055955 >>212056049 >>212056079 >>212056503
>>212053904 (OP)
>literally gets challenged to a fight by a bronze medalist female fighter Ronda Rousey
>backs down
>Ronda doubles down and says she'd be happy to sign a waiver saying she won't sue or bitch if she gest hurts/loses
>still backs down
>says it'll be an exhibition and not strikes so she won't get hurt
>still backs down

kek
Anonymous No.212056049 >>212056240
>>212055955
I mean I get that, that makes sense to me. Who'd want to fight a woman anyway?
Anonymous No.212056079 >>212056240
>>212055955
> If you win the match, people hate you for beating up a woman
> If you lose the match, people mock you for being beaten by a woman
You would have to be an idiot to take the bait
Anonymous No.212056228
he was wicked in machete
Anonymous No.212056240
>>212056049
>>212056079
>you would have to be an idiot to fight someone who would beat you up

Agreed
It's why he was afraid to fight Van Damme also
Anonymous No.212056283
>>212053904 (OP)
The direct to dvd market was a gold mine when you had the right "talent".
Anonymous No.212056418
>>212054664
US2 sucks

US1 is great. As great as Erika Eleniak's tits, and they are pretty big
Anonymous No.212056434
>>212054243
Anonymous No.212056450 >>212057504 >>212061535
>>212054822
He was in Hudson Hawk and ?
Anonymous No.212056503 >>212056737 >>212056920 >>212057344
>>212055955
Nigger Seagal might be the master of a meme martial art, but even a fat old Seagal whipes the floor with her, simply because of his height, mass and, surprisingly, still existent athleticism.
No female mma champion can beat Seagal, this isn't a flex by any means, Seagal probably just doesn't want to be known as the fat old dude who beat up a woman on live television.
Anonymous No.212056517
>>212053904 (OP)
Who is girl? I will watch for she.
Anonymous No.212056537
>>212054822
there's a self-funded Frank Stallone documentary and it is absolutely pathetic.
Also no he didn't.
Anonymous No.212056608
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sT1hA5HDhjs
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Gt-7U1ctao
Anonymous No.212056717
>>212053904 (OP)
His early movies were good, little plot, brutal action, some tits from time to time, the good stuff. Not much more to it
Anonymous No.212056737 >>212057326 >>212057944 >>212059585
>>212056503
>hey let me start with some racism
>now let me point out that a man who can barely move his fucking arms is actually a super duper athlete
>also see here's really a super duper man so I wanna blow him

The average faggot, like yourself, can actually beat him
Segal is, fundementally broken and has been since the mid 2000s when he got exposed multiple times at parties as being a fake retard
Anonymous No.212056758
>>212053904 (OP)
The magic of mob money laundering goes a long way.
Anonymous No.212056859
Reminder that russians literally worship the guy and get trained by him
Is it any wonder they get slaughtered in Ukraine?
Anonymous No.212056920 >>212057944 >>212057944
>>212056503
He won't even walk around for his movies any more. He'd get gassed faster than a one-armed Jew at Auschwitz while Ronda danced around him, and probably give himself a heart attack trying to give her one of his gay slaps.
Anonymous No.212057260
>>212054317
No shut up americmutt not white slop shut up bitch bastard ! U love Stephen seagal fucj uo mutt
Anonymous No.212057326 >>212057344
>>212056737
Type that again but without crying
Anonymous No.212057344
>>212057326
I don't cry
But okay

>>212056503
>hey let me start with some racism
>now let me point out that a man who can barely move his fucking arms is actually a super duper athlete
>also see here's really a super duper man so I wanna blow him

The average faggot, like yourself, can actually beat him
Segal is, fundementally broken and has been since the mid 2000s when he got exposed multiple times at parties as being a fake retard
Anonymous No.212057464
>>212054170
Hard to kill and under siege are solid (stupid) action movies.
I have a soft spot for exit wounds because its one of only two or three movies that references my home town (Wyandotte, MI, a suburb in south detroit).
Anonymous No.212057504 >>212057570
>>212056450
>and ?
Frank Stallone has been in a ton of straight to video trash. He was the original eric roberts.
Anonymous No.212057527 >>212057785
>>212053904 (OP)
Under Siege was nominated for an Oscar.
Anonymous No.212057570
>>212057504
>He was the original eric roberts
No he fucking wasn't. Show people a picture of Eric and they'll go "oh yeah it's that guy", show people a picture of Frank and they'll go "who's that guy".
Anonymous No.212057660 >>212057895
>>212053904 (OP)
Above the Law is his best film. Pam Grier and Sharon Stone are in it.
Anonymous No.212057688
>>212054076
>go through his catalogue, its not as bad as people make it out to be.
He’s been in hundreds of movies and like three of them are good
Anonymous No.212057785
>>212057527
Under Siege is good despite Seagal being in it and the real stars are Gary Busey and Tommy Lee Jones.
Anonymous No.212057895
>>212057660
That's not Marked For Death
Anonymous No.212057944 >>212058012 >>212058504
>>212056737
>>212056920
>>212056920
It doesn't matter, even a female "elite fighter" is ridiculously weak.
Anonymous No.212057993
>>212053904 (OP)
Because complete assholes are his audience
Anonymous No.212058012
>>212057944
Post waist
Anonymous No.212058056 >>212059229
im surprised he was able to get bitches. Dude has no game at all. He just gropes and starred in some movies. Wait I just answered myself with the latter part
Anonymous No.212058504
>>212057944
>a guy who'll give himself a coronary trying to move around a ring somehow doesn't matter because his opponent is weaker
Let me guess, you're another lardass who thinks he'd win any bout with your superior weight, even though you get winded walking up the stairs.
Anonymous No.212058664
>>212053904 (OP)
>How does he have a career?
russia
Anonymous No.212059229 >>212059268 >>212059402
>>212058056
Did he actually get any bitches, though? Every other action hero of that time were dating famous models or pop stars like Madonna but I don't remember any stories about him being attached to anyone except complete nobodies that he basically paid to have sex with.
Anonymous No.212059268 >>212059313
>>212059229
He's kidnapped/trafficked some SEA sex slaves before, yes
Anonymous No.212059293
>>212054173
>Kelly Le Brock
Had no idea she looked so good. I only remember her from Weird Science and she didn't look like a model nor particularly hot in it to me
Anonymous No.212059313 >>212059402 >>212059490
>>212059268
Like I said, paid to have sex. That's not getting bitches.
Anonymous No.212059402
>>212059229
>>212059313
see >>212054173
Anonymous No.212059490 >>212059746
>>212059313
Not paid, kidnapped.
Anonymous No.212059585
>>212056737
what racism lmao
your brain is utterly diseased and broken
Anonymous No.212059611
Does he still get movie royalties in Russia?
Anonymous No.212059746
>>212059490
Nigga he didn't kidnap anyone himself. He paid to have them supplied, like a beta cuck.
Anonymous No.212059840
>>212053904 (OP)
>Can't act
>Practise meme sexual orientation
>Complete redditor off set
>Honest
Anonymous No.212061535
>>212054822
>>212056450
I've been watching old Spoony reviews and there's a coupy he reviews that claim Frank Stallone is in a leading role only for him to either not be in it or not at all