Thread 212075749

>been around forever
>no big roles, movie, or breakthroughs
What's his deal

He's not bad when it comes to sketch comedy but he's insufferable otherwise.

He did coke in a room with Obama, bragged about it later on, and was subsequently banned from any of those events. Based on

>>212075749 (OP)
tobias was a pretty big role. or at least one most people know of.

he was great in arrested development and year one

>>212075749 (OP)
Look at his face.

>>212075749 (OP)
For a while, he didn't want to be labeled a sellout. Then he said fuck it and did a bunch of Alvin and Chipmunks movies.

>>212075749 (OP)
He pissed off the wrong jews after Arrested Development bombed because he blamed the right people for not promoting the show correctly.

he sucked his own cock in that one movie.

his role in rick and morty was kino tho
he is always funny in whatever he is in

slow and steady wins the kino race

>>212076381
Trvke

>>212075749 (OP)
He sucks and has nothing. Fumbling gay doofus isn't a real personality.

>>212075749 (OP)
he's bad honestly
sorry if this you asking, Dave
his dry schtick doesn't land because it's too condescending and unattractive

>>212076588
He has a wife 20 years younger.

>>212075749 (OP)
you come at the queen, you best not miss

>>212076562
Everyone should watch Run Ronnie Run once in their lives. Every now and then I have a flashback to that kick in the cunt song Jack Black does while dressed like a chimney sweeper.

>>212075749 (OP)
NGR LVR

>>212076912
ching chong ding dao fong

>>212075749 (OP)
He's married to Martha M. Masters

>>212076066
I guess you could say he Crossed them.

>>212075749 (OP)
He's like a lamer version of Jason Alexander.

>>212078222
RICO

>>212075749 (OP)

Lazlo?

>>212075749 (OP)
his biggest role is that "america sucks" youtube video he did

>>212075749 (OP)
He moonlights as director Damon Lindelof.

>>212075749 (OP)
I was at a bar in Atlanta one night and people kept mistaking me for him. Apparently he was a regular, which was weird given that it was a bar that appeals mostly to college kids. The next day I started working out again. It was a wake up call that I had let myself go. If I was a bit smarter, probably could have angled it into some GSU or even Emory pussy.

>>212080180
I'm sorry about your face

his deal is getting side character roles. he does them well.

>>212075749 (OP)
he peaked very early. Odenkirk had the opposite arc

>>212075749 (OP)
He was good in The Heart She Holler

>>212080388
Same is true for Judy Greer, but she gets to be hot while doing them.

>>212076912
I hate to say it, but I absolutely would, with full force

my brother saw him do stand up in 2019 and said he was completely mindbroken by Trump
I also think it's very funny amber tamblyn (david's wife, the daughter of russ tamblyn put respect on his name) tried to cancel james woods for hitting on her when she was 16 on the set of some film but she married david cross who is almost 20 years her senior

>>212076912
>queen

>>212077923
Shy slampig

I once had people say I looked like this dude. Then after the person pointed it out everyone stopped talking to me.

I was at a bar in Atlanta one night and people kept mistaking me for a guy who "looked just like" him. Apparently he was not David Cross, just looked like him, which was weird given that it was a bar that appeals mostly to college kids. The next day I started working out again. It was a wake up call that I had let myself go. If I was a bit smarter, probably could have angled it into some B-movie roles or even some voiceover work

>>212081202
Are you sure they weren't mistaking you for this guy: >>212081085

He's an insufferable cunt

>>212075987
I still love that he was forced by executive producers to be in a mascot costume for the entirety of the third movie

>>212077443
Shove your foot right into her muff!!

>>212075885
>hi nice to meet you
>I DIDNT KILL MY BROTHER OK?!

>>212075749 (OP)
Theres something very sinister about his aura

>>212076912
>Accuse them, Charlyne
>Accuse them all

>>212081650
Yeah, he said it was one cock producer who didn't like him. But also that it paid for his vacation home.
I love stories where creatives butt heads with rich, prettyboy producers who have power but zero good ideas. You just know Cross wasn't able to bite his tongue and probably humiliated the guy somehow and brought upon his wrath.
Those types are always resentful of witty, funny people. The sad thing is without those money people nothing would get made. So there's this constant tug of war with "notes" of bad ideas the producers want shoehorned in and the talented people having to choose their battles.
Only on 4chan would people side with the retard producers over the talent. Pure contrarianism here. Same as it ever was.

>>212081357
You probably have terrible social and political beliefs then.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JQYpabhq21c

Wew wew wooo weeewww!!!

>>212081891

I once wore a pair of hookers as shoes to an art opening. Sadly my artistic statement was unappreciated and they accused me of being a misogynist.

>>212081891
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e6eFWPLyDA4

>>212082256
Damn

>>212081949
Oh yeah! I forgot about Year One. I finally got baked and watched it a couple years ago. Not as terrible as I'd assumed. Ramis after all.

>>212082327
Double damn.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xe2pLTnGY7A

Blackface

>>212075749 (OP)
is that comedian tom segura? he just had a new show on netflix recently, he's doing great

>>212082114
>Try.
>Try again.

>>212082114
it's nice to have power
you can't buy wit and humor with money

>>212082114
I side with any producer who makes David cross miserable :)

He’s unfunny and smarmy, a deadly combo. He’s lucky he’s had a career at all, even as marginalized as it is…

>>212082491
There's that contrarianism.

>>212075749 (OP)
20 years ago obsessively rewatching my Mr. Show DVDs it was sad that David had stuff going for him while Bob wasn't really doing much. Still rewatching the same DVDs and it's insane that Jay Johnston was an in insurrection.

>>212082556
Are you for real? You can’t understand why someone wouldn’t think some smarmy Jew is unfunny? Oh that’s right, YOU are a smarmy Jew too :)

remember his open letter to larry the cable guy? what a nutjob

>>212082898
I agree, it’s insane that someone so cool would hang out with the losers from Mr. show

>>212077443
Damn
>Damn
Double Damn
>Damn Damn

>>212082950
Remember when he came out against free speech and said he would determine what's true and what isn't for the world?

>>212082114
Cross is a petty kike that believes whatever he’s told, it’s why he’s pushed for censorship on multiple occasions.

On one hand, he was on Mr. Show which was great. On the other he was on Arrested Development which was like a black hole of comedy.

>>212082898
>it's insane that Jay Johnston was an in insurrection
Even crazier when he freed them all.

https://youtu.be/mRntutn8udw?t=54

>>212075834
And other fantasies trumpanzees indulge in.

>>212076066
Isnt he Jewish himself?

>Cross was born in Roswell, Georgia, to a Jewish family.[3][4][1] His parents are Barry Cross, who emigrated from Leeds, England, and Susi Cross.[5]

He raked in millions 2000-2008 off of spoken word comedy albums, he made like 16 during the Bush presidency. He couldn't stop yapping. He's set for life.

He can be hilarious but apparently he's a huge douchebag. I bet he was a lot more fun in 90's before politics mindfucked him and turned into just another miserable snarky redditor.

>>212082932
No. But I'm educated and have liberal sensibilities, so I don't find intelligence and smugness so off-putting as you do.
I'm sure you resent people who aren't as simple as yourself.

>>212083167
You have strange, conflicting tastes.

>>212075749 (OP)
I saw him do standup a few times and he is one of the funniest guys ever, I'm okay if he wants to just go live his life or whatever. Also, he was in those Chipmunks movies.

>>212083391
It must be very confusing to have these suspicions about jews and have them conflict with other suspicions about jews. Almost as if the whole idea is fucking schizo nonsense.

>>212076642
>jew with lots of money

>>212083054
No. But I remember him being censored on Netflix.
I'm sure you're referring to some measure of moderation on Twitter or something, said before Musk bought it.
You must be very happy with what 'X' has become now

>>212084755
Yes, there's no such thing as real love. It's all just nepotism and power and money.

What's it like seeing the world from your bitter, misinformed, and paranoid perspective?

>>212084824
Who could be behind this post?

>>212076637
>his dry schtick doesn't land because it's too condescending and unattractive
He's a lot like Bill Burr in that he's just one of those small angry men

>>212083502
>He raked in millions 2000-2008 off of spoken word comedy albums, he made like 16 during the Bush presidency.
And a lot of them were good because this style of humor worked at the time. Now he's just another old guy yelling at clouds

Because he's a limo liberal hack

>>212075749 (OP)
Zoomers don't know that he went to China with Gavin McIness under where they ate dog meat and pretending to be American businessmen looking to have apple pies made with prison labor and no real apples

He was quoted on a reddit AMA saying he fucking hated that RC airplane mission on San Andreas not only because he couldn't finish it because he played the OG version that had the plane use fuel even gliding, but because he had to listen to his own whiny voice repeatedly.

>>212085626
Bill Burr made a much more successful career than Dave (not to say Dave Cross' career wasn't successful either).

He's good at voice acting. Did Halo 2 and Archer for a bit

>>212086485
For as much as they are praised, GTA III-San Andreas had a lot of annoying ass bullshit missions

>>212085626
>>212086543
Burr is a way better improver than Cross

>>212075854
Tobias Funke is the worst character of AD but it was a big role, yeah.

>>212084743
You're literally making things up to get angry about based on the post you replied to and calling these strawmen schizos.

>>212075749 (OP)
he looks like allen ginsberg and is probably just as jewish/degenerate

>>212075909
its an amazing character face. you can instantly start conjuring up all kinds of characters in your mind just from looking at him.

>>212086485
That's fucking hilarious. And why I love him.

>>212086607
The worst one is when you have to follow the car with the kidnapped guy in the trunk using only the signal on some receiver to track him.

>>212086734
Not literally.

>>212086607
Rockstar games in general have a lot of bullshit, annoying missions. RDR2, their crown jewel, while a great game still suffers from this problem. Great characters, great dialogue, great mechanics, but every mission still devolves into killing 40 people for there to be no consequences whatsoever story wise. NUKES immersion for anyone with half a brain.

>>212087101
You're spoiled with unrealistic expectations. I guess fantastical escapism video games don't even make sense anymore to autistic people who want there to be real world consequences to contend with.
You should play whatever simulation that kid was playing at the beginning of Hot Tub Time Machine where his character was doing pushups in a prison cell.
I'm sure by now some bullshit like that exists for weirdos like yourself who want "realism".

Wew, erotic letters from Ben Vereen

>>212075749 (OP)
This was the only thing he did that made me cry laughing
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=97CuAQ_xxM4

He god mad at Felix Biederman on Chapo Trap House because he is scared of the nation of Islam

>>212076912
lmao this is the Kim Kardashian of #metoo

>>212075749 (OP)
10x less charisma than Bob Odenkirk had.

>>212087397
lol, I love this.

"Dear Cooahs, I can't get beer in me!"

>>212086682
>Tobias Funke is the worst character of AD but it was a big role, yeah.
Nah that's Sally Sitwell. I can't think of a truely funny moment from her.

>>212076912
It's actually impressive how bad her acting in house is

Donnie wants a beer!

>>212084670
See how smarmy you are, Jew?

>>212084743
Shalom!

>>212087661
What Jew? You're insane. Of the 15 million jews alive in the world you're always in some forum arguing with them. Aren't they too busy running the world?

>>212087661
>>212087698
Hey, you exposed yourself twice in a row. Now you can leave.

>>212086627
What does he improve better at?

>>212087101
GTA IV bored me to fuckin' tears. it was just run'n'gun and escort missions the whole time with that lame ass character Nico complaining about how hates killing

>>212087780
On his podcast

(212087720)
You and I both know you are paid to make these lame posts defending Jewish bullshit everyone hates. But I do appreciate you using me to get (You)s, you won’t be getting anymore :(

SKIBIDEE BOP OOOM DAHTDAH

Oh, well I hope you stop replying entirely instead of just replying to the ether like you are now. You and I both know you're crazy, and no one gets paid to spend time on fucking 4chan. And why would you appreciate me using you? You're alone in this. You're brainwashed to think whatever isn't racist hate is 'jewish bullshit'. No one hates it but you. Go back to being a bitter virgin and post anime or something.

>>212084670
Maybe you're not smart enough to realize how trite and banal you and David are, not humble enough to admit it.

>>212075749 (OP)
I love how you can STILL, right now, go on HBO Max and watch Mr. Show making fun of religions and showing a cartoon of 'the prophet Mohammad", when that same shit was pulled from South Park and has gotten foreign journalists murdered.
I don't know if no one knows it's there or it's just that everyone who loves Mr. Show is too cool to ever complain about it.

>>212087523
Wow. Hilarious.

>>212087865
>>212087968
Hey you guys forgot to tag each other

>>212087534
(I had to look her up)
Yeah, I get ya. I meant the main cast though. I had a think about it and I rate Tobias above Buster.

Donny wants to climb a tree!
(that's a metaphor, you're the tree)

>>212087255
I would buy your argument if RDR2 presented itself as fantastical escapism like the GTA games do. Instead it insists it's masterful storytelling when the "story" itself is completely undermined by the gameplay. As I stated, I actually enjoyed RDR2 overall but the main story missions are by far the worst part of the game. Every one is almost exactly the same.

>>212088335
>sanest coors enjoyer

>>212084779
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=msPTG_ORwbA

Some actors are just b listers anon.
You gotta deal with it

>>212076066
Who were the right people and why did this piss off the wing jews?

>>212082114
TRY
TRY
TRY AGAIN
HEAD FIRST THIS TIME
DIVE RIGHT IN!

>>212076912
I actually met Charlyne the other day in a bookstore in San Fran. She told me she was raped by Phil Spencer in 1995. Put a gun to her head and told her if she told anyone he'd kill her. She also slept with Richard Pryor.
>captcha NGAAJ

>>212077923
this is one fuckable bitch.

>>212075749 (OP)
That´s Tobias ,he´s gay

>>212086959
True. Kind of like clint howard or don davis, a couple of "that guy's" but for all the right reasons.