I hated this fucking movie on day one with a passion. Picrel is 95% of the reason.

Brundle McReddit comes in with his smug hippy-dippy Luddite faggotry under the guise of 'muh science', totally giving away the plot, and the movie spends the following two hours tripping over itself to prove his stupid pussyfaggot nonsense right.

>Why would Hammond invite some mathematician soi-fag to the park in the first place?
"Muh Chaos Theory" - fuck off. Hammond doesn't even listen to his horseshit anyway. And by his logic you couldn't have so much as a lion in a zoo outside Africa because it 'doesn't belong there' because 'muh nature' and if 'muh Kayoz Feary' made it escape it would be 'bad'. Get fucked faggot.
Oh noes a fucking Giraffe escaped from a circus and mule-kicked a car. Ban circuses!! And just think what would happen if a elephant got loose!!! Oh the humanity! SHUT IT DOWN!! Circuses are a total failure because that happened the first time we tried it!
How about you just fucking deal with shit instead? Unnatural Selection over time is how humans turned wolves into fucking toy poodles, you just kill the ones you don't want - it's not rocket science.
No, let's do nothing because there's no such thing as zero 'Chaos'. Doing nothing still has chaos. Like if don't kill every butterfly I see, how do I know that they wont flap their wings and cause a hurricane on the other side of the world. WE HAVE TO KILL ALL BUTTERFLIES ON SIGHT BECAUSE MUH SCIENTH HURR DURR!!

>'Muh frogz jeanz'
They are monitoring these dinosaurs 24/7 for health and behaviour and never did any testing or saw them fucking or laying eggs. Okay whatever.
Not particularly relevant to the immediate problem of Newman cutting the power and the T-Rex escaping.
What if the frog genes cause the dinosaurs to be able to hop and they hop right over the fence or off the island onto another continent? Maybe their hopping causes earthquakes. That would be as stupid but at least less plebbit.

>>212359678 (OP)
TL;DR

>>212359704
Go back to Twitter homo.

Not reading your chatpgt thread

>>212359713
Cringe

>>212359732
I suspect you've never read anything longer than 140 character in your whole pathetic Zoomer life.

Seethe and dilate.

>Why would Hammond invite some mathematician soi-fag to the park in the first place?
if you can't even grasp basic plot points of the movie why should I care about the rest of your opinion

I could see this rant applying to Goldblum's character in Independence Day, where he is an Earth loving super-genius recycling-advocate. But in Jurassic Park he has good, memorable lines, turn your brain off.

>>212359808
There's literally no fucking logical reason he'd invite that clown except for the plot to conveniently prove his load of dinosaur shit right later. You're the one who doesn't understand basic shit.

>>212359678 (OP)
Calm down there, Hemingway. This isnt your personal blog. Summarize your point in 10 words or less cause I aint reading all that shit.

>>212359678 (OP)
Hammond needed experts to examine the park for safety approval and got people from different fields. He was hoping they'd be amazed enough to just agree and move on but they don't. Malcolm brings up issues and Hammond gets angry. It's supposed to be a "dumb rich guy doesn't care about safety and just wants money" but the science guy provides a rational discussion.

>>212359678 (OP)
I'm so glad my mother didn't drink while she was pregnant with me and I dont have oppions like this.

>>212359881
>Summarize your point in 10 words
No. What I write isn't specially engineered for your Zoomie attention span. Never had been, never will be. So fuck off.

Also if you'd ever actually read anything longer in your life, or how paragraphs work, you'd know that the first part is the most relevant, introduces the basic idea, and all the rest of the 'zomg wordz' back it up. But you've never backed up any of your retarded soundbite opinions in your life and couldn't if you tried you retard.

>I aint reading all that shit
And I ain't going to care. Not now, not ever.

>>212359967
>oppions
Looks like your mother is a lying whore.

Imagine missing the point of the book and movie this much.

Fake and gay op

>>212359678 (OP)
>maybe maybe, get a peice of pussy from the dinosaurs?
Also, saged

>>212360106
Imagine being this plebbit and thinking you just watched something smart, even though it was obvious Luddite hippie anti-capitalist envirofaggotry parading around in a 'muh science' veneer like you in your mother's underwear.

>>212360185
>Also, mad
Fixed that for you.

>>212359678 (OP)
>>212359872
>>212359887
>I bring scientists, you bring a rock star.
The Lawyer brought Ian Malcolm. Hammond brought Alan and Ellie. Dumb fucking idiots whine and complain but don't understand the most basic plot points.

>>212360373
Hammond just allowed anyone to bring anyone to his secret dinosaur island without knowing who beforehand.

Nice try.

God I hope this is real

>>212360442
he is right, dumbass. after goldblum goes on one of his rants on the helicopter ride in, hammond scoffs and tells the lawyer "i brought scientists, you brought a rockstar"

>>212360753
So if the lawyer who works for Hammond wanted to bring a plumber he'd be on the helicopter too and Hammond would be saying, "I bought scientists, you brought a plumber"?

Then we'd see a scene where a plumber argued that it wouldn't work because there was no way that any size pipes could possibly handle all the dinosaur shit?

>>212359678 (OP)
Yeah but...
>Alan cucks him
>T Rex rekt him
>we find out he's a womanizer with three kids
>has a black daughter in the second film
Malcoms life is shit.

I want a retelling of Jurassic Park but everything is working so swimmingly and without flaws that Malcom, incensed at the lack of "chaos" begins a campaign of sabotage to prove his point, but Hammond's elite team of scientists and security experts are simply too good at their jobs for any of his attempts to work. Malcom's attempted reign of terror ends with him jumping into the T-rex enclosure and repeatedly kicking the tired dinosaur to get it to eat him before he is removed by the security team and deported from the island in disgrace.

>>212361205
Nedry still ruins this you imbecile.

>>212361002
both parties were supposed to bring experts. the lawyer was representing the investors so he/his expert were a third party that hammond had no control over.

>>212362088
So if the investors decided to send a plumber ...

>>212361205
If Chaos Theory worked the way Goldblum and muh science fags are all wetting their pseud pants over, then you could apply that both ways and the second the T-Rex escaped it might stub its toe and fall backwards into the fence strangling itself in the power lines, so there's nothing to worry about and never was because nature finds a way.

Also one of the stupidest lines is about the dinosaurs having their time and "nature" taking them out. An asteroid. I wonder if he'd be so sanguine about an asteroid coming to wipe out humans. Well that's what the great god "Nature" wants I guess. Retarded.

Humans are never part of "nature" in the minds of people like this, and what about us "finding a way" with technology and shit? Why is that against the rules?

>>212359678 (OP)
God Adam Friedland really does look like him.

Spielberg tongues my anus.

>>212362702
Sounds like your fantasy.

>>212362129
are you going to bother making a point or are you just slapping at "post" now and then?

>>212359732
I like how people who write well thought out, detailed responses get called AI by rewards now

>>212362619
>I wonder if he'd be so sanguine about an asteroid coming to wipe out humans.
well, yeah. that's the point of chaos theory

>>212364882
No it isn't retard.

>>212364892
yes it is, retard

>>212364925
>exactly the kind of pseud who 'loves the science' but doesn't understand it one bit

>>212364949
yeah? and you're ugly

>>212365011
And U R faggit.

>>212359678 (OP)
This is what mental illness looks like.

>>212360750
>High Jackman
Jej now this is kino

>>212359678 (OP)
uuuuuh can you.. shove it up your ass Steve?

Ur gay

>>212359678 (OP)
Malcolm is the best character. Fucking retard.

Lauren Derp and those 2 stupid kids were the WORST. Jeff wasn't that bad.

>>212360199
OP actually stuck around to defend his indefensible "point"?

LOL
'plebbit'
Get a fucking life, you contrarian cunt.

>>212359678 (OP)
He invited him because he was a popular public figure, kind of like Neil deGrasse tyson. The guy appealed to the broad general audience while still maintaining an academic background, and thus he brought him a long for PR reasons. Are things like this difficult for people with autism to understand?

>>212359872
See: >>212367637

>>212360750
There are far too many retarded misspellings for it to be real.

>Wolveriae
>REDARCTED
>R-Rtated Fhsenble
>SECERT-WARS
>known oly

And that's just at first glimpse. That was concocted by someone who'd never get a resume by HR. Shit bait.

>>212367637
These little zoomy 'tards don't have a leg to stand on in an argument.

>>212367592
>does nothing for the whole film except spout reddit lines
>gets sidelined like a bitch
Great "character." Alan is and always will be better.
Not even OP.

>>212359678 (OP)
Solid take. Jurassic Park failed because of Hammond's mismanagement. The morale of that story is that incompetence and corruption fucks good things up, not muh hubris of man or some shit. Man was given dominion over animals by God himself, and we've done a pretty good job so far apart from the odd retard.

>>212360750
Is high jackman, like Hugh Jackman except tall?

>>212361205
Is it just me or does this sound like the plot to an episode of mash?
I think I might rewatch mash.

>>212359678 (OP)

>>212367774
I don't remember where I saved it but I really like that reaction image of that British TV host laughing and pointing at the camera and it says your brown in really big text on top of the top and then at the bottom

>>212359678 (OP)
>This got the nostalgia faggots seething.
Jurassic Park (1993) is indeed mid.
As soon as the dinos break out 90% of the park workers just disappear from the island apart from the main cast.
The movie just feels empty and no death scenes are shown of the park workers.
Its just the owner and 3 people were running the park after the break out.
Jurassic World is better than JP although its the same 1 own
>JW steals the story of JP but does the Dino park scenario better
>JP has an original story and Dino park scenario is medicore

>>212367884
>As soon as the dinos break out 90% of the park workers just disappear from the island apart from the main cast
They left for the mainland before the storm, the park was automated anyway so they weren't needed

>>212364865
my first reflex was also to wonder if it was chatgpt. we are already at the point where any text longer than a few sentences is suspected to be AI. strange world we're heading to. i wonder what malcolm would say about it

>>212367705
Why are you building a fake competition and choosing sides between characters on the same team? No one would even think to say which of Malcolm or Alan is "better".

I don't know if it was the election or your general stupidity or what, but you people create bullshit divisions where there exist none.

It was humans vs. dinosaurs. There's no 'reddit' involved in any of this. Alan and Malcolm didn't even seem to have any disagreements beyond some unspoken romantic chest puffing unrelated to dinosaurs.

Fucking bitter terminally-online incels like you and OP are ruining everything by trying to make sides and create fights.

>>212361002
Yes, deal with it

>>212368001
tl;dr, Grant's still better.

>>212364865
As a verbose and thorough poster on this website, I absolutely hate it. I've even been compelled to post a fucking timestamp and then STILL the paranoid fucktard refused to back down and suggested that not only does AI come into the threads and argue with people, but that these bots also make fake AI pictures and submit them along with their arguments.

Do people now believe there is malicious software not only capable of doing any of that but also that it's deployed here and acting independently?
Being called a 'bot' when you're not one is way more frustrating than being called 'jewish' or a 'tranny' or 'brown' or anything else. Someone questioning my humanity pisses me off.

>>212359678 (OP)

You know Goldblum slammed prime Laura Dern on that shoot.

Did the asteroid that allegedly killed the dinosaurs kill any other animal classes that are no longer around today?

>>212367919
3 workers still doesn't make sense while having guests in the park during a test run and the guest have not left yet.

>>212368077
I bet hes got a huge cock too

>>212368090
Yeah

>>212368179

He's one of the guys who lures them in by acting like a sensitive faggot.

>>212367637
>like Neil deGrasse tyson
Funniest own goal ever. Doesn't even know he's proving point in the OP about pseud plebbit I-love-science fucktards.

>>212368064
fucking bots

>>212368064
The worst part is these faggots ACTUALLY BELIEVE bots are incapable of writing short posts which are going to be less obvious than ChatGPT writing a long post, which is still obvious, and OP is clearly not. But even shitty bots have been able to flood sites like this with gay one-line shit indistinguishable from actual human faggotry for a lot longer. Just Zoomers who can't read - or bots themselves. Pathetic.

>>212368237
I agree, I don't like ndt, just explaining the reasoning for including Malcom. Not because authority, but popsci popularity

>>212368111
Hammond was cutting costs. The park was designed to run with only bare essential crew, and most of the workers who were there were builders, they had nothing to do with the visitors, and couldn't build anything during a storm. Even the kitchen closed, after a last serving of chili and sea bass.

>>212368237
Are you confusing science with pseudoscience? Are you some christian creationist type who thinks "science" as a whole is wrong or fake or bad or something?

I don't understand this new anti-intellectual stance where I guess you think you're dunking on people for being stupid for "believing" science.
Are you suggesting Neil deGrasse Tyson is some sort of charlatan who's been proven wrong about a lot of things? Or do you just think science education is 'corny' or something?

lol, why the fuck am I engaging someone as retarded as you in a discussion? Nothing fruitful can come of this.

I keep thinking I'll just age out of using this website but year after year I put myself through it.

>>212368402
probably antivax schizo stuff

>>212368370
Still not credible justification. You don't need to bring Nigger deGrasse Tyson to a dinosaur island or anywhere else. You already know his opinion on literally everything, and it's retarded and gay as fuck.

Would you have to bring Greta fucking Thunberg on a tour of a new oil refinery to find out what she thinks?

>>212368402
Such a fag he actually confuses what Nigger deGrasse Tyson does with actual science.

>>212359678 (OP)
Let me take a wild guess, you hate jews, you want a genocide of billions of the untermenschen, and you spend all day shitposting on 4chan?

>>212368485
>Let me take a wild guess, you 'love science', you want to spend billions of taxpayer money on Leftarded bullshit, and you have a shitload of faggot points on plebbit?

He's actually the funniest character in the movie. When I rewatched it as an adult I was more entertained by the human characters than by dinosaurs.

>>212368439
This shit happens all the time, they're flying politicians to Fiji to look at a tree or some shit when they could just google it

>>212368439
You seem really angry about this. Malcolm was there as a PR stunt, that's literally all there is to it.

>>212359678 (OP)
I like the cut of your jib, feller. I will consider this. Await my sign.

>>212368439
>Invite critic of your work
>Impress him
>He admits so publicly
Like it or not that was hammonds plan. The book makes it's pretty clear.

>>212359678 (OP)
>Brundle McReddit
i bet you thought this shit would pop off

>>212368192
Okay, thanks.

>>212368585
No problem I like being helpful

>>212359678 (OP)
>>212360199
>Luddite
what youtuber introduced the zoomies to this term

>>212368577
The book doesn't fucking matter, moron

>>212368604
My prison computer class teacher

>>212368556
I have thought it over and decided that OP is based and you're all reddit. That is all.

>>212368515
Those ARE the two choices of personality after all.

>>212368697
>based good, reddit bad

You have to be 18 to post here

>>212368697
Fuck off, OP. You've lost the 'argument' many times over. Remain ignorant if you must.

>>212368395
>The park was designed to run with only bare essential crew.
Didn't know AI existed back then.20 empty workspace for Unix system department are shown but sure bare essential crew.
>most of the workers who were there were builders
Park was already completed.Scientists,Heli pilots,people assembling bones in the main building and others just disappear.
>Even the kitchen closed
Not even 1 chef is present for Main cast.
The guests were VIPs i.e experts in the field,A Lawyer,Mathematician for some reason and owner's grand children.
Mid movie is Mid.Only 3 people are running a Dino park cus Storm.Jurassic World is just a better movie.

>>212369254
Hi ryan

>>212369254
Read the book lmao

>>212369488
>Read the book lmao
Go back this is /tv/

>>212368577
>>212369488
Take that shit to /lit/ faggot.

>>212369488

I read it when I was 12. I've forgotten most the contents but I remember there is a lot more background on the corporate espionage and the genetic science.

>>212369580
>>212369532
How about you both suck my fucking cock instead you cavemen

>>212359678 (OP)
Watch the movie again without looking at your phone you retarded faggot. How could you miss such basic plot points you absolute bitch

>>212369955
Yeah, we need a mathfag in here to tell us there's a non-zero probability of something going wrong who can't tell us how. Then lecture us on the environment and how man shouldn't play God or whatever.

Investors understand risk and would give zero shits about his gay non-specific opinions. You can't even justify it with some PR bullshit because they wouldn't hire him in the first place. Also a bit fucking late after they already built the fucking park.

Like hiring a 'safety expert' to tell you what's wrong with a nuclear reactor after you build it, but it's Ralph fucking Nader. Gee if we can just get his approval it will be good PR. Genius move.

>>212359678 (OP)
Ok so when we are talking about reddit movies, what is up with the worship of Gattaca? It is a good movie about a retard that risks the life of others because he's a whiny little bitch and redditcoded wa waa gene editing is bad waeee. Reminds me of christcucks and their crusade against having fun with embryos.

>>212369532
>huh huh, reading is for gay hipsters smarter than me, duh huh

>>212368395
Fun fact, the construction workers you see in the film are the actual construction crew in the process of actually building the set, they just decided to shoot with them there to make it seem more realistic.

>>212367884
>Jurassic World is better than JP

Fuck off, Colin

>>212370193
Funny, reminds me of Leftards trying to make companies like Boeing hire niggers as engineers, women as pilots, and trannies as executives when their actual qualifications are obviously INVALID.

Something else annoying about this film is it's obviously 'overengineered' to the point that even shit that should be kinda cool like the sign falling behind the roaring T-Rex at the end is stands out in such an 'on the nose' kinda way that it gives you an eyeroll reaction instead.

It's not through the whole movie or anything, and I can forgive it a bit considering the complexity of the effects at the time and level of preplanning required, (not so easy to just recut and retool shit back then so you'd want to get it right the first time), but it's still there - like some kind of off-putting Spielbergian stank.

Add to that the over-rehearsed force-meme lines before there were even Internet memes like, "Mommy's very angry", and, "Clever girl" and it really grates on anyone with an IQ above the average redditor. Especially that last one is just stupid due to the timing. What in the fuck is that faggot doing taking the time to compliment a fucking dinosaur on its intelligence when he has a fucking gun in his hand and impending death? Yet faggots act like this is some kind of brilliant scene. It could have been good - or at least less annoying if it was re-edited to do something about the timing. Maybe say the line as you're pointing the firearm at the fucking dinosaur. Maybe be in a position where you actually have more time to flap your gums. Something.

Just one of the examples of where this movie is SUPPOSED to be clever instead of ACTUALLY being clever. I can't believe the number of retarded faggots who clap like seals at this obvious fucktardation.

Of course the effects and underlying concept are good. Anyone - especially a young boy - would want to see a fucking dinosaur movie any day or the week, but that doesn't mean you can just insult my fucking intelligence while you're at it.

>>212361002
>So if the lawyer who works for Hammond
The lawyer worked for Hammond's investors

>>212359678 (OP)
>Why would Hammond invite some mathematician
I'm pretty sure Hammond says to the lawyer, "I bring scientists, you bring a rock star" after one dose of Malcolm talking.

>>212371287
>"Clever girl" and it really grates on anyone with an IQ above the average redditor. Especially that last one is just stupid due to the timing. What in the fuck is that faggot doing taking the time to compliment a fucking dinosaur on its intelligence when he has a fucking gun in his hand and impending death? Yet faggots act like this is some kind of brilliant scene. It could have been good - or at least less annoying if it was re-edited to do something about the timing. Maybe say the line as you're pointing the firearm at the fucking dinosaur. Maybe be in a position where you actually have more time to flap your gums. Something.
I remember reading the book and liking his character more there. He also survives at the end, which makes sense given that he's the only character that had a real chance of survival due to his experience. Having him die in the movie was retarded.

>>212360199
Jurassic Park is very pro-capitalist or specifically pro-free-market. The whole point is that human systems of control are destined to fail. It's anti-command-economy. This is more explicit in the book because the movie is less concerned with philosophical ramblings and more with exciting dinosaur chases.

>>212361002
The lawyer works for the investors you utter dumb fuck. Delete this thread

>>212371287
>the sign falling behind the roaring T-Rex at the end
It's kino and you know it

>>212371631
You seem really mad. Rage faggot, rage.

>>212364882
>>212364925
Chaos theory is about the instability of complex systems and sensitivity to initial conditions. It's not about random events like meteors fucking systems up.

>>212359678 (OP)
I didn't hate it, but I saw it opening weekend, and admittedly I was a little kid, but I got bored in the second half. Like wanted to leave bored. Watching it again as an adult, the third act is still really weak with a borderline deus ex machina conclusion that feels less like an ending and more like they got bored of chase scenes and just stopped the film.

I fking love Jurassic Park, boys. It kickstarted my life long obsession with dinosaurs when I saw it when I was 5. 30 years laters, I'm still amazed by how perfect this movie is.
The brilliant score. The overwhelming acting talent. The amazing special effects, with that incredible blend between CGI and practical effects. (The rex animatronic that pushed Grant and Malcolm's car, spots the lights in the kid's car and seemingly smoothless transitions from animatronic to CGI in half a second) . The dialogue is top notch, the action leaves you on the edge of your seat, the story is truly one of a kind.
My god, I need to see it again for the 50th time

>>212364865
Just because you happen to like it doesn't make it well thought. It's just a overly long rant about hating Jeff Goldblum.

>>212371287
you're watching it from the perspective of someone who's been saturated with references to it and who was born 20 years after it was made.
it wasn't supposed to be 'clever', it was a family dinosaur film with good effects and a bit of a darker tone than usual.
note the explanation for any of the genetics stuff was done as a cartoon reel for the audience in the film.
speilberg stuff in most of his films feels like going on a disney ride - each area has a set piece which is rigged to go off in the ssme way every time.
boulder in indiana jones, boat in goonies.
trex nose punching the car.
you're the reason imdb scores for old films should have been frozen in 2005, because your consciousness isn't natural, and instead exists on a fearful, self-referential meta plane where you gripe about everything like a nutcase.
>I saw a meme 680,000 times before I saw the film it came from and now that scene stands out!! help meeee!

>>212368064
seen this exact post numerous times, it's a bot

>>212360753
he was referring to him wearing leather and shades and acting like a degenerate.

I watched a film the other night where Jeff Goldbum played an incel who worked as a famous stage comedian's sidekick, played by Rowan Atkinson

>>212370193
>semite revels itself

>>212359678 (OP)
TL:DR

>>212359678 (OP)
Fucking die you honosexual!

>>212368395
>Hammond was cutting costs
we've spared no expense
>Hammond was cutting costs
we've spared no expense
>Hammond was cutting costs
we've spared no expense

>>212371697
There's a lot of problems near the end. Just look at this scene and see how gay the triumphant music is. Makes a dinosaur flick come off like some kind of faggoty E.T. type crap:
https://youtu.be/NI8plnMkJWk?t=242

Actually that music belongs at the end of a fucking Harry Potter film when he wins the Quidditch Cup, not here.

I mean, I get what we're going for here. The skeleton, the T-Rex being the 'human bean and a real hero', but that shit compounds and compounds upon itself to sheer faggitation levels. Hammond's response to what is a decent line is also just wrong. Just another example of people falling to their knees and admitting how wrong they were because the other person beat them with the 'muh science', (the same way the kid doesn't just tell Sam Neill to shove his raptor claw up his faggot arse at the start because he gets an emotional 'muh science' lecture from a 'muh scientists' and becomes enlightened to his evil bullying ways because dinosaurs are really cool so have some respect for the them and my plebbit scienth powers. Nigger deGrasse Tyson wet dream shit, but the reality is faggots like this mouth off and get told to STFU and stop being a gay pseud faggot.

And what boy, (or heterosexual man for that matter), is interested in sitting through stutter-fuck Brundlefly shmoozing Admiral Holdo while using the shittiest uncinematic example of chaos that you could possibly come up with? At least if he could figure out how to do it by sticking a pencil through a folded sheet of paper like the FTL shit it would have been funny to see her reaction to the subtext.

It didn't have to have boring and/or gay shit like that at all with just a few changes

>>212372168
bot post

>>212371940
Now who can't fucking keep up. I said I saw it when it came out retard. When every faggot was wetting their pants over it and I knew shit in it sucked.

I like Spielkike movies, and I know how beat sheets work, and appreciate why they work unlike Zoomers, but this one is way overcooked.

>>212372168
You write like a channel awesome contributor, consider being less of a faggot.

I think the choas theory anyle relates better to the genetic manipulation.

>is this what dinos looked like? Is this what they acted like? I dunno, we've done so much gene splicing on top of releasing them in an environment different from what they evolved in.

And then all the dinos just die from shitty alleles or cancer or birth defects etc.

The escaping stuff is dumb. Just dig big pits around the enclosures like zoos have done for 100 years.

>>212372265
You write like a tranny, consider not shaming your own parents.

>>212359678 (OP)
Imagine this is your life - writing idiotic rants about thirty year old blockbuster seeking validation. I understand, to err is human, but for the grace of God.

>>212372325
Imagine replying to them with pics from movies that are about as old. One of these lives has a future ...

>>212372252
sure you did.
>when it came out on the disney channel 2 weeks ago

>>212372369
>implying anyone actually watches Disney's shit these days

The real reason the literal homos ITT are defending this character and the film.

No heterosexual man could see this character as anything other than an annoying reddit fag.

/thread

>>212359678 (OP)
>Why would Hammond invite some mathematician soi-fag to the park in the first place?
In the opening scene one of the park workers is killed by a dinosaur and this causes the investors to get cold feet. Hammond decides to show the park to some experts to try to reassure the investors. These experts include some chosen by the investors(Gennaro and Malcolm).
>"Muh Chaos Theory" - fuck off. Hammond doesn't even listen to his horseshit anyway
Why would he? Hammond's whole character is believing they have total control, that every problem can be solved by throwing more money at it, and nothing will go wrong.

>>212372611
>Hammond's whole character is believing they have total control, that every problem can be solved by throwing more money at it, and nothing will go wrong.
And he was right. They just hadn't installed any solar-charged battery-powered automatic laser turrets. Now we know. Problem solved.

The same fags who praise the 'muh science' in this film are also the homos who are whining about public overreaction when a NASA rocket blows up on the pad and politicians want to delay or defund 'muh science'.

Pick one.

Do you have any idea how much shit can go wrong with a fucking rocket engine - let alone an entire space mission?

Also the same faggots getting triple-boosted if you want to talk about biology and chaotic unforeseeable consequences.

>>212372733
>triple boosted
that was the end of humanity, or evidence that it had already been wiped out on a mental level.
it's the fact that it was the whole world, with very few exceptions, at least that we were allowed to know about.
no alternative allowed, no escape.
it felt like invasion of the body snatches, with humanity diminishing in magnitudes day by day.

>>212372824
At least I got to laugh at this lazy attention-seeking cunt and her orbiting cucks getting consequences for her unquestioning belief in I-love-science and getting what SHE FUCKING DESERVED after rejecting Saint Terry Davis:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vqeIeIcDHD0

>'muh Long-COVID'
Yeah sure, suffer you quadruple-boosted cunt.

Where is your chaos god now?

>>212372733
>And he was right. They just hadn't installed any solar-charged battery-powered automatic laser turrets. Now we know. Problem solved.
So your issue is that John Hammond becomes disillusioned instead of just correcting the mistakes he made? You'd probably prefer the book, where Hammond continues to believe in the project even as he's eaten alive.

>>212372941
>actually thinking him being eaten alive somehow disproves his position
How gay pseud plebbit can you get?

>>212359678 (OP)
I'm glad you're finally confident enough to come out publicly, anon.

>>212372968
I didn't say that, I said you'd prefer the book where Hammond doesn't get disillusioned.

>>212369254
>Didn't know AI existed back then
Are you literally retarded?

>>212372159
>>Hammond was cutting costs
>we've spared no expense
Sparing no expense doesn't mean "we were deliberately wasteful". Automation is expensive in the short term.

>>212372891
I can't laugh about any of it - humanity's been destroyed.
fuckwits like that cunt are likely lying or mentally ill anyway - you can tell by the croaky voice her and her fag boyfriend put on - especially him.
why would they take pictures and post them to PROVE she's going to a hospital.
it's all attention seeking retardation.
as for the rest of normal people who were coerced, lied to and tricked into it, nothing funny about that. it's resulted in 2/3rds reduced fertility in young girls, nuked their ovaries over absolute lies.
it's horrific and the top 30 million people involved in the scam should have their entails pulled out in public for the harm they did to billions.

>>212373077
>fuckwits like that cunt are likely lying or mentally ill anyway - you can tell by the croaky voice her and her fag boyfriend put on - especially him.
All the talk about the effect of her emotions on her physically and the other subjective feels as fact must be her idea of 'science' too. Also we need to 'raise awareness' about shit I suddenly care about, even though she's never questioned all the boosters and just believed whatever cope story she was told.

Fuck I hate this whore and her cuck husband. There's a video of her with a black eye not long before this. Probably all some reaction to realising she married someone who smacks her around, but acts like a soi-fag male feminist in public.

Here's the 'lady doth protesteth too much' muh science cope story because she thinks she's too smart to just say she walked into a door like any other pathetic whore:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hZjFYFWZJe4

>>212373343
seems like a typical hypochondriac attention seeker.
in the comments she even adds she had a secret hidden super special concussion which actually alters mood!! as well, and actually her thing is soooo rare but it's actually like super common!! croak croak croak
glad I don't watch any internet talking heads because I'd be battering the monitor every week

>>212373536
Video starts: I want people to know about this disease.

Spends whole video throwing out gay abbreviations for fake diseases and talking about her feels.

No detailed scientific explanation of how this disease is even supposed to work, just a bunch of whining about unlikely selective and subjective symptoms, and ME-ME-ME sympathy seeking. She had a "crash" and muh "depression" over pen pal in the Nebulous Bullshit Disorder, (NBD), community, which physically caused her to "crash". So scientific, I can so feel all the science in this video.

Kek at her looking like shit. Blessed Terry dodged a bullet with this crazy self-absorbed hypochondriac cunt. I would have hoped she'd die from this, but somehow I knew she wouldn't, so imagine my shock.

>>212373536
>in the comments she even adds she had a secret hidden super special concussion

>@physicsgirl (3 years ago)
>Fun fact: concussions can change your mood. When filming this, I didn't realize I had a concussion. (The doctors checked my eyesight and helped me craft my story about the 50 ft wave, with the shark and the child I saved, but they didn't mention a concussion). The day after I filmed this, I felt really down and depressed. Then 2 days letter, felt happy again, like mood whiplash. I found out a week later I had a concussion and would have definitely not filmed the JWST video the same day, had I known. A dire warning for the lot of you!

Holy shit. Thanks for the belly laugh, I didn't see that. What an obviously crazy bitch. Even less surprise soon after she got a self-diagnosed disease.

Reminds me of Jordan Peterson's whore daughter and her beef diet shit. She claimed that after eating the wrong food she would be fucked for months after. Yet somehow she managed to guess that eating only beef would fix it, even though she'd only have been able to try the correct food or combination of foods every few months. How lucky she got it right. Then convinces science man Peterson to do it too and he retardedly believes it. That's not how science works. Also it 'working' for a day or a month or a year isn't proof it's a smart diet, and he should know that.

The absolute state of 'muh science' these days, I fucking swear. The exact kind of retards who wouldn't notice anything amiss with Jurassic Park. The exact same faggots who start every sentence with, "I FEEL like ... ".
>"I feel like that's not true."
>"I feel like the science says climate change will kill us all in a year."
>"I feel like the science in Jurassic Park is mostly right and chaos is bad because mother nature."

>>212359678 (OP)
>I hated this fucking movie on day one with a passion
You wouldn't talk like that had you seen it when it came out.
Now kill yourself, brainfried zoomer retard.

>>212374684
I also hated The Force Awakens day one - an experience you have when you can think for yourself - but I bet you were seal-clapping along with all the other sheep.

>>212374557
>The exact kind of retards who wouldn't notice anything amiss with Jurassic Park.
You couldn't follow basic plot points.

>>212362129
Why do you keep using this retarded plumber analogy? They sent a, in universe, respected mathematician as a consultant to do what's essentialy a risk analysis, which is something that mathematicians do pretty often. At most, you can argue they could have picked a more serious but less knonw one, but with them being retarded investors they probably insisted on hiring the pop famous one.

>>212360199
Anon, I genuinely think you are reading into this too much. Being gainst recklessly trying to control nature with no regards for the consequences is not necessarily an anti-capitalist message unless you want to read it that way.
Pic related.

>>212359678 (OP)
not reading, faggot

>>212359678 (OP)
>And by his logic you couldn't have so much as a lion in a zoo outside Africa because it 'doesn't belong there'
CONDORS!

>>212368439
>Would you have to bring Greta fucking Thunberg on a tour of a new oil refinery to find out what she thinks?
I can see some rich dumbass trying something like that to try and score good boy points, honestly.

>>212359732
ChatGPT, write me a 4chan post through the lens of 2025 movie criticism

>>212359704
YOU CANT CONTROL NATURE BECAUSE.....BECAUSE FAT EMPLOYEES DISABLE SECURITY OK

>>212359678 (OP)
Compared to the Director's Cut of DAWN OF THE DEAD, it's awful... it has no lulls, tension, twists or extended conversations and was just meant to be a nice 90min distraction in theaters before it was forgotten. It remains a hallmark of blockbuster filmmaking, but it has significant problems despite the amazing cast and crew.

>>212378234
I mean, structurally it has its lulls but it's not highly dramatic after the first watch, it's just very well calibrated for bsckground noise on VHS
>the relationship between Grant and Sadler
>the first tour with the missing t-rex
>the electric fence test
>getting stuck in the tree
>also highly quotable
those lulls are what make it so rewatchable, wish more movies had them.

>>212359678 (OP)
this was Crichton's self insert, the chad who shows up and is immediately proven right about everything and his arc is concluded so he gets hurt to get him off screen and the movie can focus on the family building aspect. He was the best character desu senpai

>>212359678 (OP)
>I hated this fucking movie on day one
I saw this movie day one when I was 5 years old, and I dropped a whole bucket of popcorn before I'd even sat down.

>>212378544
JAWS is full of improvised character moments that are essentially lulls, but somehow it all works so much better maybe because the beach is so near the islanders on Martha's Vineyard. If they wanted to celebrates JAWS 50th in Jurassic Park, they should've set it in the USA, maybe even having the balls to set the story right in Martha's Vineyard.

>>212378685
if they made JP today, the voice of reason would be a sheboon instead of a high IQ chad, be grateful

>>212360442
>Hammond just allowed anyone to bring anyone to his secret dinosaur island without knowing who beforehand.
Wow, almost like Hammond says he spares no expense and takes everything seriously, but doesn't think things through properly and this causes him some chagrin! A bit like main plot of the 1993 movie "Jurassic Park" in a way.

>>212367884
>I watch movies with the sound off
Wow.

All entertainment is just a distraction, so goyim don't focus on more important info, issues or skills. It's offered under the guise of making you "less bored". Oh, you're bored? Go watch a movie, a TV show. That's how we were treated as children and that's why it carried over into teens and adulthood. And we're told it's also a key part of our "culture". Movies, shows, online media, it's all useless slop.

>original JP sucked
i'm glad someone finally had the clarity to say this. classic slop just looks good compared to how bad current slop is.

>>212378945
>Boy, do I hate being right all the time.

>>212359678 (OP)
I just liked the dinos running around and eventually killing some people

>>212378927
semi-improvised on the set

>>212372482
sort of a Byronic nerd.

>>212359678 (OP)
His character is the worst thing about the movie
It's like a guy with a doctorate from r*ddit university plus they should have portrayed him as way more scummy for accuracy

>>212359678 (OP)
>cool action movie makes no sense
many such cases, terminator 2 involves time travel

>Brundle McReddit
the movie was made in 1993 how do you associate it with reddit

>>212359678 (OP)
>>'Muh frogz jeanz'
>They are monitoring these dinosaurs 24/7 for health and behaviour and never did any testing or saw them fucking or laying eggs. Okay whatever.
>Not particularly relevant to the immediate problem of Newman cutting the power and the T-Rex escaping.
>What if the frog genes cause the dinosaurs to be able to hop and they hop right over the fence or off the island onto another continent? Maybe their hopping causes earthquakes. That would be as stupid but at least less plebbit.
this film came out about the same time they discovered frogs changing sex due to human pollution. Just a coincidence right?

>>212374212
>Nebulous Bullshit Disorder
ha
succinct.
I have MMNBLDS, mild malaise not bed leaving disorder syndrome, yeah it's actually science that I can't be bothered to get up.
update: I also have WSOTFHADD, Watch Shit on TV for hours a day disorder. it means I can't stop filling the hours with mindless channel surfing and is actually due to a virus I caught once, which is visible and can't actually be tested for.

I like him much more in the book where his arrogance and constant philosophizing are still correct, but he's such an asshole that it's only out of basic human decency that they don't leave him for dead and nobody cares when he dies after spending days boredline comatose ranting incomprehensibly every once in awhile. Also he stopped breathing and they firebombed the island but he survived apparently and acts very different by book 2

>>212359678 (OP)
>>212360199
>>212360442
zoomers aren't beating the charges

>>212380951
>hello. I am a newfag and/or bot
>explain your claim
>my 2d mind can't understand
>time frame incorrect
>error
>error

>>212378945
was just a ww2 program on TV talking about the development of the V rockets.
seemed to be standard fare, mediocre, cheap shit made from most flash animated archive photos - then they went on site to one of the still standing buildings - heard the name, the voice, then saw it and turned it off.
was a sheboon from a ghetto in london that could barely pronounce normal words that they'd announced as being a top ww2 weapons expert.
>yeah dis is uhhh metal, init an dis bit prolabi frum a - uhh rokit or sumfink

>>212376578
>ChatGPT write me an ironic post in response to this OP because I'm a Zoomer who can't read or think for myself
ChatGPT said:
ChatGPT, write me a 4chan post through the lens of 2025 movie criticism

>>212376230
Oh fucking spare me. Remember that time only 5,000 years ago when 'muh nature' created the Sahara fucking Desert and a significant portion of the entire human fucking race had to move?

Do humans even get any credit for all the artificial lakes and combating of 'muh natural' desertification to a tune mulitple times the surface area and volume of shitty salt water body drained by literal Communist central planning? Let alone the fact that the water formerly feeding the Aral Sea is actually providing some kind of benefit else, it didn't just evaporate off the face of the planet before doing so even with typical inefficient Soviet shitarsery.

If we collected all the envirohippie tears we could refill the Aral Sea, but unfortunately not Lake Mega-Chad because the hippies have no tears to shed for bodies of water wiped out by 'muh nature' even if they are ten times bigger and wipe out more species of fish and animals - least of which in their eyes is fucking humans.

>>212371287
Eat shit, faggot. You're jaded and bitter because you're an incel virgin. Stop mentioning reddit here.

Where are the janitors and why are they allowing racism outside of /b/??

>>212384761
Triggered and can't win the argument so appealing to fucking jannies to try to make it go away. How pathetic can you get?

>>212384723
Oh I'm sorry, did I insult the site you need to go back to?

>>212381591
You just wouldn't understand. She has it so much worse than you. Her disease is a very severe strain of BCoA&MEEDE4MD, (Be Centre of Attention and Make Everyone Else Do Everything for Me Disorder).

It makes it so you literally can't do anything, and even gives you super scientific 'brain fog', but even with all every physiological system in your body affected, never seems to kill anyone. It's like when your phone is running on super battery saver. It will be on 1% power, but will waste some of that remaining power to light up the screen to tell you that it's power is low. Likewise this cunt can just manage to muster up the energy to whine about shit and do shit she actually cares about like writing a text to some guy she likes the look of on the other side of the planet, but then she 'crashes' and can't talk to her cuck husband who is in the same room feeding her.

My fucking sides in orbit when faggots actually believe this shit.

>>212360753
>>212361002
it's a metaphor

>>212385303
reading your post just made me shit my pants with exhaustion, i have BRWICBBTUTTS bowel release when I can't be bothered to use the toilet syndrome, and that means I have to have a support elephant whenever I fly, so it can lightly constrict its trunk around my midsection and reduce my likelihood of pooing myself out of laziness by 15%. it costs the airline an extra 250k for every trip, as they need to hire out half an airbus for me, but I have special requirements. what am I supposed to do? not fly to bali twice a month for parachute lessons?
while her case is very important and should have the public spectacle it deserves, not many people know about my LTMTFDD lying through my teeth for donations disorder.
if you can spare enough for a cup of coffee for me, say 2,000 bucks, per day, it would really make a difference and I'll even put your name in a lottery to perhaps win the chance for me to put your name flashed briefly on the screen at the end of one of my videos.

>>212368402
Where does your hatred stem from?

>>212368192
whoa

>>212385686
Your Mom is a metaphor.

The Lost World is the better film

>>212359678 (OP)
You sound young, you had to be there. It was peak kino in the 90s